Alaskan Holiday
Page 16

“Don’t cry,” he murmured, groaning. “Your tears are kryptonite.”
“That’s the problem. You think you’re Superman.”
Not wanting it to end, we begrudgingly broke apart, knowing we had to get to the party. Palmer placed his arm around my shoulders, bringing me close to his side. I leaned against him, needing his strength.
“We’d better go, or we’ll be late.”
The last thing I felt like doing was attending a party, especially a party celebrating me.
* * *
—
Despite my initial mood, we had a wonderful evening. Angie and Steve were gracious hosts. Angie had cooked a delicious dinner, and then games followed that included the adults and the two boys. When it was time for Mason and Oliver to go to bed, Steve carried his sons, one under each arm, up the stairs to their bedroom. Jack and Palmer tagged along because they were recruited to tell the boys a story before their lights were turned off for the night.
With the men out of the room, I helped Angie with the dinner dishes, scraping the plates before setting them in the dishwasher. “It’s going to be hard to leave come morning,” I commented.
Angie dried her hands on a dishtowel. “I remember Steve driving me to the airport after our first three days together. We’d known each other such a short time; I was already half in love with him. I almost missed my plane because neither one of us could find a way to say good-bye. I realize it sounds trite, but I believe things turn out the way they were meant to be.”
More than anything, I wanted to believe that was true. “It’s hard to go…hard to leave…”
“Trust me, I know that all too well,” Angie said, reassuring me with a gentle pat on my shoulder. “I did, and it was for the best. It was months before we saw each other again. It all worked out in the end, and it will for you and Palmer, too.”
“Keep an eye on Palmer for me, will you?”
“Of course.”
“He works too hard and skips meals.” I needed to know that someone would look after him.
“I’ll make sure we have him over for dinner at least once a week.”
“Jack, too?” I’d grown especially fond of the old sourdough.
I could feel the tears gathering in my eyes and blinked several times to keep them at bay.
“You want me to feed Jack?” she cried in mock horror. “That man eats more than six hungry lumberjacks.”
“He does,” I agreed.
“Now, stop those tears,” Angie said, swiping at the moisture gathering under her eyes. “Much more of this and we’ll both be sobbing.”
I knew she was right, and we half laughed and half cried, unable to decide which emotion was the strongest, each of us flipping between the two. “I’ll keep in touch,” I promised.
“I will, too.”
Angie turned back to the sink. Then, almost as if she found it necessary to share the realities of life near the tundra, she added, “If you do decide to marry Palmer, you should know that living in Ponder won’t always be easy. Love will carry you only so far.”
“You made the transition,” I reminded her. I appreciated Angie’s words of advice. I’d enjoyed the six months I’d spent in the area, but it wasn’t anywhere close to being Shangri-la. It was the first time in my life I’d lived in a place where I couldn’t reach a fresh market within twenty minutes, not to mention an emergency medical facility. Even the Ponder post office closed in the off-season. I’d never heard of such a thing.
“Steve asked me to give it a year,” Angie explained. “He told me that at the end of that time, if I wanted to move, then he agreed that we would move to a larger town.”
“You chose to stay, though.”
“I did, although I was pregnant with Mason before our first anniversary. By then I’d come to love the town and the people. Could I really leave Lilly or Jack and the other friends I’d made? In the end, I realized Ponder had become my home, too.”
“But you found a way to make use of your degree. There isn’t that opportunity for me here,” I argued. Angie could write her books in this remote place, and yes, of course, I could always cook for the lodge, but that wasn’t going to be enough for me. Not after all the sacrifices I’d made to get a culinary degree. Angie brought up the idea about writing a food blog, but without access to fresh ingredients year-round, it seemed out of the question. As far as I could figure, few, if any, employment options existed for me in Ponder.
Angie and I had finished the dishes when the men returned from putting the boys to bed. We all gathered in front of the fireplace, and Steve brought out a bottle of wine.
“Been saving this for a special occasion,” he said and sighed. “Guess Josie leaving tomorrow is it, although I don’t think any one of us is celebrating the fact.”
Angie joined her husband and placed her arms around him. “Actually, I have a piece of good news. It looks like Mason and Oliver are going to be big brothers.”
It took Steve a couple seconds to understand that he was about to become a dad for the third time. When he did, he let out a whoop of joy, grabbed Angie around the waist, and whirled her around.
Once he released Angie, I hugged her, while Jack and Palmer slapped Steve across the back. Steve poured wine for us all, and Angie grabbed a glass of apple juice as we all saluted the latest addition to the population of Ponder, Alaska.
When the evening was over, Palmer walked me back to the lodge. We had our arms around each other the entire way, clinging to each other before it became necessary to part.
“Sawyer said he’d be landing around nine-thirty, right around sunrise.”
I already knew the time and wished it wasn’t so early. I wanted to delay my departure as long as possible.
“Will you walk me out to the dock in the morning?” I asked, not wanting to waste a single minute we had left.
His hesitation surprised me.
“Palmer?” I asked, when he didn’t respond.
“Forgive me, Josie, but I don’t know that I can.”
His refusal shocked me. I understood his reluctance; I had my own. A good-bye, no matter how brief, would be difficult.
“I don’t know if I have the strength to let you go,” he admitted. “It might be best if we said our good-byes now.”
I didn’t like it, but I understood.
With his arms around me and his lips close to my neck, he said, “I need you to do one last favor for me.”
“Anything.” I was struggling not to cry.
“When you get back to Seattle, please don’t tell me anything about Chef Allen.”
“Anton.”
He grinned sheepishly. “You know who I mean.”
I considered his request and frowned, needing to make sure I understood what he was asking and why. “You don’t want me to tell you anything about him? That’s nuts. Why not?”
Palmer eased away from me and rubbed a hand down his beard. He looked utterly miserable. “He’s perfect for you, and—”
“Palmer!” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.
“No, hear me out. Please. I’m already jealous that he’s going to be spending all that time with you. He’s everything I’m not. I realize I sound like a whiny little boy and I apologize, but for my sanity, keep that relationship with the chef entirely to yourself.”
“I’m not going to be dating him, Palmer. Not ever. I know better than to mix my professional and personal life. You have nothing to worry about.”
“Maybe not. Time will tell.”
His request shocked me. I didn’t know what he’d read about Chef Anton that made him think I’d fall for the renowned restaurant owner. I wasn’t a fickle teenager, after all. And I loved Palmer.
“You need to trust me. First off, I’m not the least bit attracted to him, and second, I refuse to jeopardize my career by dating my boss.”
“You say that now, but—”
“Palmer,” I said, “you’re being ridiculous.”
“Maybe.”
“You are!” I insisted. “It’s you I love.”