Angelfire
Page 70

"Wow" was al I could say.
"It was quite a night," he said. "You were amazing."
"Sounds like you were amazing."
He shook his head. "You've always astounded me. Your strength has kept me with you and it's why I fol ow you."
I smiled. "I wish I remembered."
"You wil ," he insisted. "I keep tel ing you that, because it's true. There are many things I wish you would never remember, but they al make you who you are. I've never known anyone else who's seen such unspeakable tragedy in their lives, and stil you're more human than the entire rest of the world."
"You sound so sad," I noted.
"I am." He didn't elaborate.
My fingers wove through his hair, and he leaned back into my hand, turning his face so that his eyes met mine. "Don't be. I'm sorry."
"There's nothing for you to apologize for," he said. "No matter how many times I tel you how sorry I am, it'l never make up for al the times I've failed you and let you die."
"Wil . . ."
He looked fiercely into my eyes. "I meant it when I told you I've never broken a promise to you. You wil survive Bastian, I swear it."
"I believe you."
He sat motionless and silent for some time. I laid my head back down and watched him. He seemed deeply lost in his thoughts, and it broke my heart to see him so tormented.
"I have a question about the Grigori," I said, struggling to think of something to take his mind off whatever was bothering him. "Didn't some of them have children with humans?"
He nodded. "The Grigori weren't truly wicked like the Fal en were when they rebel ed against Heaven, but somehow being bound to Earth as punishment caused them to develop mortal desires and emotions. Instead of silently watching over the human world as they were supposed to, they slept with mortal women and fathered powerful halfhuman, half-angel creatures cal ed the Nephilim."
"Could that be what I am?" I asked. "I'm mortal, but I use the power of angelfire."
"No," he said gently. "The Nephilim were monsters. They were born out of fal en spirit, and nothing good came from them. They were enormous and violent, more monster than the most frightening of reapers. God flooded the Earth to destroy them, and then He made the Grigori infertile so that no more abominations would be created. A handful of the Nephilim may have survived, but I've never seen one. It's not possible that you are one of them. You'd be ten feet tal and looking for a fight left and right."
"They sound nasty."
"They were," he said. "Nasty enough for God to flood the world to kil them al off. He's only ever done that once, and you know of al the horrible things out there now. He was pretty desperate."
I couldn't imagine monsters more terrible than the reapers I'd seen. It made me wonder what the Fal en were like and about the truth behind Lucifer, Sammael, and Lilith. "Why did Lucifer rebel? Why would he risk something like a war against Heaven?"
"I don't real y think I'm qualified to answer that."
"But what do you think?" I asked. "I'm sure you have a theory."
He closed his eyes as I smoothed my hand over his hair again. "Love, I think."
"Love?" I gave a smal laugh. "I thought Lucifer was evil. He can't love anything."
"He did," Wil said, looking at me again. "He loved God very much, but an angel isn't supposed to feel love. God does, however, and he loves humans more than anything. An angel isn't supposed to feel jealousy, either, but Lucifer did. He was jealous of humans because God loves them more. And he rebel ed. And lost."
"This sounds weird, but I kind of feel bad for him."
"Love is a beautiful but terrible thing," he said. "You have to be careful with it. It can destroy you. That is why the angels aren't supposed to feel emotion. They must be infal ible and without doubt."
"Sounds like a rough gig. It must suck to have to be perfect."
He smiled. "Good thing we don't have to be."
I pul ed the covers up to my chin and was quiet for a little while. His face was so close to mine that I could taste his breath. I wondered what it would be like to kiss him. "Thank you for coming with me tonight."
"Of course."
"And for staying with me. Thank you again."
"Anything for you, El ie."
I smiled, but his selfless words broke my heart. He meant that ful y, and I trusted his oath. "I always feel better when you're close to me."
He studied my face for a few moments as his expression became tranquil. "You should try to sleep."
I nodded. "Yeah. You'l be here when I wake?"
"I won't leave the room."
My eyes closed. "Thank you."
The vir erupted into flames as her head spun off her shoulders. Ashes settled around me, clinging to my hair and the thick folds of the skirts around my legs. I relinquished my swords, and when the angelfire died, the city street turned dark again. Will called my name as he finished off the other reaper, its body turning to stone and crumbling to the ground. The pain in my abdomen was mind numbing and my throat kept filling with blood. I choked on it and pulled my hand away from my belly to see how much damage the reaper had done when she'd stabbed me. The fabric was shredded and there was too much blood for me to even see my skin. I squeezed my eyes shut as another torrent of pain shot through me. I staggered dizzily on my feet as Will called my name again. He touched my shoulder and I ground my teeth in pain. Every inch of my body hurt, and cold rushed through me, spreading from the wound in my belly.