My heart aches. “I know you did, and I let you down. For that I’m so incredibly sorry.”
“I didn’t mean what I said, you weren’t just sex, it wasn’t meant to come out like that. You know what I was saying. I told you I didn’t want anything serious that soon, you agreed to that, but I also know I fucked up so bad because I shouldn’t have done it to begin with. I’m fucking sorry for being such a dick.”
“You’re not a dick, and honestly, I shouldn’t have done it either because I did care about you.”
“Yeah, I know. But that was then. I’m going to fuck up sometimes now, I’m trying not to hurt you, I don’t want to hurt you. I fucking hate myself for what I’ve put you through. Honestly, I really did want things to work out between us then, it was just too soon. I feel like a pig for the way I’m treating you. I can’t get hold of myself, but I should never lead you on.”
I hold his eyes. “Let’s just leave it in the past where it belongs. We can’t change it, and honestly, I think we both kind of rebounded a little on each other when we probably shouldn’t have. That was a mistake we both made, but we came through the other side, we adore each other, let’s just get past this as the friends we are now, and leave the rest where it needs to be, in the past.”
He nods. “Yeah, sounds good to me.”
“Do you forgive me?”
He looks to me. “Yeah, of course. Do you forgive me?”
“Gosh yes. Can we hug and pretend yesterday never ever, ever, ever happened?”
He laughs and stands, opening his arms to me. “Get over here, punk.”
I step up to him and let him wrap his arms around me, and I hang on tight.
Dammit, do I hang on tight.
~*~*~*~
ONE MONTH LATER
“I’m so freaking excited!” I squeal, bouncing up and down in the chair of Roman’s truck.
We’re finally heading out to his property to go camping. We planned it a while back, but after our fight it just didn’t feel right. Now things are back to normal, and he’s heaps happier and finally moving on properly from his ex, it’s finally time to get out here and spend some time on the land.
I’m super excited about it.
“You’re not going to cry that it’s scary and you don’t like sleeping in tents or anything, are you?” Roman teases.
I snort. “No! I’m totally okay with sleeping in a tent and making a fire.”
“I brought a lighter, you know, just in case. We all know how good you are at lighting fires.”
I feign horror. “Don’t pay out on my fire lighting skills, Roman. It might take me approximately eighteen days of rubbing sticks together, but you will get a fire!”
He laughs. “Or, I could just use the lighter and save us all the embarrassment.”
I roll my eyes and bounce around as the truck goes over the dirt road leading up to his place.
“You’re staring at me,” he says and I blink.
“What?”
“You ... always stare at me when I drive.”
I giggle. “I do not.”
“Yes, you do. Always.”
I gape. “What? Are you serious?”
“Yep.” He grins. “Every time I’m driving, you’re just sitting there, staring, like a weirdo.”
“Oh, my god,” I moan, covering my face. “I’m a total creeper.”
He nods with a grin. “I can’t figure out if you’re checking me out or if you’re just weird.”
I lower my hands and grin. “I’m totally checking you out, and I think that alone makes it worse.”
He nods. “I think you’re right. Weirdo.”
I smile and turn and stare out the window.
“Well, now you’re putting your back to me,” he teases lightly.
I flip him the bird over my shoulder. “You can’t have your cake and eat it too, Roman.”
“What a stupid statement,” he pipes up and I turn back to him. “Cake is supposed to be eaten, is it not?”
I laugh. “I think they mean you can’t keep it there, looking all pretty and perfect, and eat it at the same time. You have to pick one or the other. You’re either eating it or admiring it, but you can’t do both.”
He grunts. “Stupid statement.”
I giggle. “Men.”
“Women!”
We both laugh.
“Did you bring jeans on this camping trip?” he asks. “I don’t want you running around in your underwear—you’ll scare off the wildlife.”
I reach over and punch him in the arm. “If I want to scare off the wildlife, I’ll scare off the wildlife. I’m okay with that. At least they won’t harm me, then.”
“Well, maybe that was my plan.” He wiggles his brows.
“I knew it all along, you’re a serial killer!”
He winks at me. “I was wondering how long it would take you to figure out.”
I press a hand over to my mouth and fake gasp. “How are you going to kill me? Can I at least know before I die?”
“I’m going to tie you up like a star to two trees and leave you naked. Then I’m just going to see what happens. I vote the town people figure it out first and all the men get in there and have a great time with you.”
I roll my eyes. “How original.”
“There will be dicks hitting you from all angles, just—” he puts his hands up quickly and makes out like there is dicks hitting him all over his face “—like that.”
“You’re a pig.” I chuckle. “Seriously.”
He reaches over and shoves me playfully. “Nah, don’t stress, I’m just going to shoot you.”
“Wow, you just get better and better.”
He winks at me.
This should be a fun night.
CHAPTER 25
I shove the stick into the fire place and growl. Roman laughs behind me. “Not so savvy now are you, beautiful?”
“Shut up,” I grumble, leaning down and trying to light it again. It flickers, but nothing happens.
“I could do it for you if-”
“Do not touch my fire!” I snap, shuffling the sticks around again.
Roman snorts and I turn, glaring at him. He gives me a shit eating grin, and flops down into a chair, cracking a beer. He looks gorgeous tonight, in a black tee and a pair of faded jeans. His hair is freshly cut, and only slightly messy on his head. His eyes are light, happy. It’s the best I’ve ever seen him. “Well, if you won’t let me help, then by all means, I’ll sit back and enjoy the show.”
“I didn’t mean what I said, you weren’t just sex, it wasn’t meant to come out like that. You know what I was saying. I told you I didn’t want anything serious that soon, you agreed to that, but I also know I fucked up so bad because I shouldn’t have done it to begin with. I’m fucking sorry for being such a dick.”
“You’re not a dick, and honestly, I shouldn’t have done it either because I did care about you.”
“Yeah, I know. But that was then. I’m going to fuck up sometimes now, I’m trying not to hurt you, I don’t want to hurt you. I fucking hate myself for what I’ve put you through. Honestly, I really did want things to work out between us then, it was just too soon. I feel like a pig for the way I’m treating you. I can’t get hold of myself, but I should never lead you on.”
I hold his eyes. “Let’s just leave it in the past where it belongs. We can’t change it, and honestly, I think we both kind of rebounded a little on each other when we probably shouldn’t have. That was a mistake we both made, but we came through the other side, we adore each other, let’s just get past this as the friends we are now, and leave the rest where it needs to be, in the past.”
He nods. “Yeah, sounds good to me.”
“Do you forgive me?”
He looks to me. “Yeah, of course. Do you forgive me?”
“Gosh yes. Can we hug and pretend yesterday never ever, ever, ever happened?”
He laughs and stands, opening his arms to me. “Get over here, punk.”
I step up to him and let him wrap his arms around me, and I hang on tight.
Dammit, do I hang on tight.
~*~*~*~
ONE MONTH LATER
“I’m so freaking excited!” I squeal, bouncing up and down in the chair of Roman’s truck.
We’re finally heading out to his property to go camping. We planned it a while back, but after our fight it just didn’t feel right. Now things are back to normal, and he’s heaps happier and finally moving on properly from his ex, it’s finally time to get out here and spend some time on the land.
I’m super excited about it.
“You’re not going to cry that it’s scary and you don’t like sleeping in tents or anything, are you?” Roman teases.
I snort. “No! I’m totally okay with sleeping in a tent and making a fire.”
“I brought a lighter, you know, just in case. We all know how good you are at lighting fires.”
I feign horror. “Don’t pay out on my fire lighting skills, Roman. It might take me approximately eighteen days of rubbing sticks together, but you will get a fire!”
He laughs. “Or, I could just use the lighter and save us all the embarrassment.”
I roll my eyes and bounce around as the truck goes over the dirt road leading up to his place.
“You’re staring at me,” he says and I blink.
“What?”
“You ... always stare at me when I drive.”
I giggle. “I do not.”
“Yes, you do. Always.”
I gape. “What? Are you serious?”
“Yep.” He grins. “Every time I’m driving, you’re just sitting there, staring, like a weirdo.”
“Oh, my god,” I moan, covering my face. “I’m a total creeper.”
He nods with a grin. “I can’t figure out if you’re checking me out or if you’re just weird.”
I lower my hands and grin. “I’m totally checking you out, and I think that alone makes it worse.”
He nods. “I think you’re right. Weirdo.”
I smile and turn and stare out the window.
“Well, now you’re putting your back to me,” he teases lightly.
I flip him the bird over my shoulder. “You can’t have your cake and eat it too, Roman.”
“What a stupid statement,” he pipes up and I turn back to him. “Cake is supposed to be eaten, is it not?”
I laugh. “I think they mean you can’t keep it there, looking all pretty and perfect, and eat it at the same time. You have to pick one or the other. You’re either eating it or admiring it, but you can’t do both.”
He grunts. “Stupid statement.”
I giggle. “Men.”
“Women!”
We both laugh.
“Did you bring jeans on this camping trip?” he asks. “I don’t want you running around in your underwear—you’ll scare off the wildlife.”
I reach over and punch him in the arm. “If I want to scare off the wildlife, I’ll scare off the wildlife. I’m okay with that. At least they won’t harm me, then.”
“Well, maybe that was my plan.” He wiggles his brows.
“I knew it all along, you’re a serial killer!”
He winks at me. “I was wondering how long it would take you to figure out.”
I press a hand over to my mouth and fake gasp. “How are you going to kill me? Can I at least know before I die?”
“I’m going to tie you up like a star to two trees and leave you naked. Then I’m just going to see what happens. I vote the town people figure it out first and all the men get in there and have a great time with you.”
I roll my eyes. “How original.”
“There will be dicks hitting you from all angles, just—” he puts his hands up quickly and makes out like there is dicks hitting him all over his face “—like that.”
“You’re a pig.” I chuckle. “Seriously.”
He reaches over and shoves me playfully. “Nah, don’t stress, I’m just going to shoot you.”
“Wow, you just get better and better.”
He winks at me.
This should be a fun night.
CHAPTER 25
I shove the stick into the fire place and growl. Roman laughs behind me. “Not so savvy now are you, beautiful?”
“Shut up,” I grumble, leaning down and trying to light it again. It flickers, but nothing happens.
“I could do it for you if-”
“Do not touch my fire!” I snap, shuffling the sticks around again.
Roman snorts and I turn, glaring at him. He gives me a shit eating grin, and flops down into a chair, cracking a beer. He looks gorgeous tonight, in a black tee and a pair of faded jeans. His hair is freshly cut, and only slightly messy on his head. His eyes are light, happy. It’s the best I’ve ever seen him. “Well, if you won’t let me help, then by all means, I’ll sit back and enjoy the show.”
