Bite Me
Page 38
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Vic dropped his head into his hands.
Chuckling, she tapped the sides of the horses flanks with her heels and rode to the field. True, she might not have ridden the horses at her fancy private school, but that didnt mean the gym teacher wasnt a bitch who hated Livy so much she made the fourteen-year-old sit and watch the others for the entire period. At the time, Livy hated Mrs. Webb, but at the moment, shed discovered a newfound appreciation.
Once Livy was led into position, she looked around at the crowd. The faire was surprisingly big and had a lot of attendees. Even the cats from the town next door came to the Honeyville Annual Renaissance Faire.
And apparently the joust was the most popular attraction; the makeshift arena was already packed, with the audience continuing to grow.
Honey stick?
A seven-foot, older grizzly stood next to her, his face obscured by an enormous beard and long brown and gray hair. Another hippie, she was guessing. Like Rita.
Livy took the offered honey stick, bit off the tip, and sucked out the honey inside while the grizzly studied her a moment before asking, I know you honey badgers are tough and all, but you do know that were going to crush your tiny little body into the dirt, dont ya?
Yeah. I know that.
You dont mind?
Not as much as I probably should. She shrugged. Trying to work out some issues.
Ahhh. I see. The grizzly leaned in. Well, me and the guys had a thought. You see, the reason we have this first night of jousting is because we always have to work through the cats from next door before we can get to a good rousing joust with the rest of us. The felines bring a lot of money to this faire, so we put up with em. But it gets a bit boring.
Livy again looked around at the audience, which was still growing . . . with bears.
You want me to take out the cats . . . dont you? Livy asked.
Cat humiliation and bear entertainment all rolled in one. Think you can do that?
What do I get out of it? Because at the end of the day, Livy was still her mothers daughter.
Years supply of your favorite honey from Ritas store?
Livy immediately thought of the cinnamon-infused honey and she sort of shuddered. A good shudder, though. A delicious, honey-filled shudder.
Im in.
The grizzly patted her leg. Have fun, sweetie.
Livy planned to . . .
Vic rested his forearms against the wood barriers used to block off the jousting area from the crowd surrounding it and watched Livy.
He didnt know what the hell she was up to. Why was she doing this? What had happened when she went into that damn womans apartment?
Is she your girlfriend? Rita askedhim.
Who? Livy? He shook his head. No. No. Just a friend. A good friend, he quickly added. Ive got her back or whatever. But just . . . um . . . were just . . . ya know . . .
Rita placed her hand on his shoulder and rested her head against his arm. Breathe, sweetie. Breathe. Its going to be okay.
Dont start, Rita.
She laughed. You always get so flustered over the strangest things.
Livy isnt a strange thing. She is currently, however, suicidal.
Shell be fine. Shes just going up against the cats. Vic glanced at Rita and she quickly added, No offense.
Yeah, the bears did like to forget that he was half-feline, but that was still more than most cats were willing to do for him.
Livy hefted her lance like she was trying to get used to the weight.
This is crazy, Vic growled. Stupid and crazy.
Ive never heard honey badgers called stupid before.
Vic waited for Rita to say more. When she didnt, he looked at her, and she shrugged. Really. I havent heard them called stupid.
Sighing, Vic returned his focus to the field just as the signal was given and the joust was on. Livy lowered her lance and spurred her horse into a full gallop. At least this time she didnt try to talk the horse into going.
The two riders charged toward each other until their lances rammed into the others shield. Livy fell back against her horse, but she held her seat. Her opponent, however, didnt seem to even flinch. Hard to tell, though, with that helmet on his head.
The crowd cheered as Livy and her opponent rode to the end of the barrier and turned to face each other again. Livys helmeted head tilted to the side and Vic knew she was sizing up her opponent. She readjusted her grip on the new lance that had been handed to her and moved around a bit in her saddle. Then she nodded.
The signal was given, and the two riders charged toward each other. Livy lowered her lance just a bit seconds before it hit her opponent, sending him flipping off his horse so that he landed hard on the ground.
The bears in the crowd went wild. The cats . . . not so much. But at least they had the decency not to hiss.
Sadly, as the joust progressed into the evening, that decency didnt last. Not with Livy knocking each and every cat that came along off their horse. Leopard. Bobcat. Cheetah. Bengal tiger. Cougar. On and on it went. Finally, it was down to a massive lion male who had openly shown his dislike of Livy when hed walked by her at the end of a break and roared in her face, baring large fangs.
Livy didnt even look at him. She just let one of the bears pick her up and put her back on her horse.
Chuckling, she tapped the sides of the horses flanks with her heels and rode to the field. True, she might not have ridden the horses at her fancy private school, but that didnt mean the gym teacher wasnt a bitch who hated Livy so much she made the fourteen-year-old sit and watch the others for the entire period. At the time, Livy hated Mrs. Webb, but at the moment, shed discovered a newfound appreciation.
Once Livy was led into position, she looked around at the crowd. The faire was surprisingly big and had a lot of attendees. Even the cats from the town next door came to the Honeyville Annual Renaissance Faire.
And apparently the joust was the most popular attraction; the makeshift arena was already packed, with the audience continuing to grow.
Honey stick?
A seven-foot, older grizzly stood next to her, his face obscured by an enormous beard and long brown and gray hair. Another hippie, she was guessing. Like Rita.
Livy took the offered honey stick, bit off the tip, and sucked out the honey inside while the grizzly studied her a moment before asking, I know you honey badgers are tough and all, but you do know that were going to crush your tiny little body into the dirt, dont ya?
Yeah. I know that.
You dont mind?
Not as much as I probably should. She shrugged. Trying to work out some issues.
Ahhh. I see. The grizzly leaned in. Well, me and the guys had a thought. You see, the reason we have this first night of jousting is because we always have to work through the cats from next door before we can get to a good rousing joust with the rest of us. The felines bring a lot of money to this faire, so we put up with em. But it gets a bit boring.
Livy again looked around at the audience, which was still growing . . . with bears.
You want me to take out the cats . . . dont you? Livy asked.
Cat humiliation and bear entertainment all rolled in one. Think you can do that?
What do I get out of it? Because at the end of the day, Livy was still her mothers daughter.
Years supply of your favorite honey from Ritas store?
Livy immediately thought of the cinnamon-infused honey and she sort of shuddered. A good shudder, though. A delicious, honey-filled shudder.
Im in.
The grizzly patted her leg. Have fun, sweetie.
Livy planned to . . .
Vic rested his forearms against the wood barriers used to block off the jousting area from the crowd surrounding it and watched Livy.
He didnt know what the hell she was up to. Why was she doing this? What had happened when she went into that damn womans apartment?
Is she your girlfriend? Rita askedhim.
Who? Livy? He shook his head. No. No. Just a friend. A good friend, he quickly added. Ive got her back or whatever. But just . . . um . . . were just . . . ya know . . .
Rita placed her hand on his shoulder and rested her head against his arm. Breathe, sweetie. Breathe. Its going to be okay.
Dont start, Rita.
She laughed. You always get so flustered over the strangest things.
Livy isnt a strange thing. She is currently, however, suicidal.
Shell be fine. Shes just going up against the cats. Vic glanced at Rita and she quickly added, No offense.
Yeah, the bears did like to forget that he was half-feline, but that was still more than most cats were willing to do for him.
Livy hefted her lance like she was trying to get used to the weight.
This is crazy, Vic growled. Stupid and crazy.
Ive never heard honey badgers called stupid before.
Vic waited for Rita to say more. When she didnt, he looked at her, and she shrugged. Really. I havent heard them called stupid.
Sighing, Vic returned his focus to the field just as the signal was given and the joust was on. Livy lowered her lance and spurred her horse into a full gallop. At least this time she didnt try to talk the horse into going.
The two riders charged toward each other until their lances rammed into the others shield. Livy fell back against her horse, but she held her seat. Her opponent, however, didnt seem to even flinch. Hard to tell, though, with that helmet on his head.
The crowd cheered as Livy and her opponent rode to the end of the barrier and turned to face each other again. Livys helmeted head tilted to the side and Vic knew she was sizing up her opponent. She readjusted her grip on the new lance that had been handed to her and moved around a bit in her saddle. Then she nodded.
The signal was given, and the two riders charged toward each other. Livy lowered her lance just a bit seconds before it hit her opponent, sending him flipping off his horse so that he landed hard on the ground.
The bears in the crowd went wild. The cats . . . not so much. But at least they had the decency not to hiss.
Sadly, as the joust progressed into the evening, that decency didnt last. Not with Livy knocking each and every cat that came along off their horse. Leopard. Bobcat. Cheetah. Bengal tiger. Cougar. On and on it went. Finally, it was down to a massive lion male who had openly shown his dislike of Livy when hed walked by her at the end of a break and roared in her face, baring large fangs.
Livy didnt even look at him. She just let one of the bears pick her up and put her back on her horse.