Blood Queen
Page 14

 Connie Suttle

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"Lissa? Who is that?" Tony asked, curious.
"Nobody. I was wondering if you'd ever met anyone with that name." Charles had the answer to his question, now.
"Not that I recall. Gavin is shaking his head, too," Tony passed off the additional information; Gavin was listening in.
"Transmission done," Charles said. Tiny cameras, attached to every Enforcer's clothing, made recording data so much easier. The microscopic devices were incorporated into clothing in ingenious ways; front, back, high and low, and were difficult to detect. Cleaning the clothing failed to harm them, they were built so efficiently. The cameras were also quite expensive; therefore, the Council provided them and had them installed. Enforcers and Assassins faced a heavy fine if they hunted their quarry without the appropriate clothing, unless it was an emergency. Charles terminated the communication and went to report the successful hunt to Flavio.
* * *
"And just where do you intend to take me?" I jerked my arm from Kifirin's grasp. He was attempting to persuade me to come away with him, rather than traveling with the High Demons and the comesuli. Honestly, I wouldn't mind getting away from the comesuli. They were following me now wherever I went, Breth included, many with pure adoration in their eyes. Breth wasn't high on my good list right then. My hair still looked like a mess, although Kifirin offered to use his power to grow it out again. I'd refused. Kifirin brought in clothing for me, though, that actually fit. At least he hadn't brought dresses or skirts; we were still traveling over ash and with the rains on the Southern Continent, it was hardening and causing problems.
"Away from here," Kifirin replied to my question. I was getting on his nerves and he was certainly on mine. Of course, he'd already been there before he'd shown up out of the blue.
"You made this mess," I grumbled.
"I thought my mate was dead."
"Yeah, well, whose fault is that?" I snapped.
"Avilepha, I am no good at apologies. I have never made them," Kifirin explained. I almost felt sorry for him.
"Maybe you should have thought about that before sticking your teeth in my neck," I smacked his chest. We were having our latest argument in the middle of camp. Gardevik had already gotten his food and was eating with Larevik and the others. Well, the High Demons didn't have television, so they were settling for the latest episode of Lissa is Pissed at Kifirin.
"Lissa my love, I was attempting to save all the worlds, not just this one," Kifirin said. "They would all have fallen if this one fell. Did I realize how much pain it would cause me? No. Nor the pain it has caused you. It was my hope that I could find you in your next life and make things as easy for you as I could. My arms are empty and my heart will be empty as well if you reject me."
"Are you saying you don't deserve those things? Where were you before, Kifirin? Hanging out with dear old Dad?" I wanted to growl at him. Every High Demon and most of the comesuli were leaning forward to catch Kifirin's next words.
"I was sleeping." Kifirin sounded sad.
"Kifirin, I can't do this anymore," I tossed up a hand in a helpless gesture. "Do I love you? Probably. Do I expect you to hurt me again? Yes. I don't trust you. You didn't tell me anything, did you? How can I trust that? Why am I alive now, Kifirin? Can you explain that, please?" I turned away from him. The High Demons had now stopped eating, content to watch the soap opera unfolding before them.
"Lissa, you are killing us both." Kifirin's arms were around me, and he was breathing warm air against my neck. We weren't in the camp any longer. "I know I hurt you. I know I was instrumental in your death. I felt you die, love. That's what truly woke me. The Dragon's Teeth require blood. Other blood was offered, but yours was what brought me out of my long sleep. You willingly sacrificed yourself in the end. Tell me you didn't know what you were doing. Tell me you didn't give your life freely, making your own decision that very last time. You could have backed away, yet you did not. You saw the opportunity to leave the Copper Ra'Ak leaderless and fighting among themselves for control. That would give the others a chance to win the battle and save this world, as well as all other worlds."
"You know that's not why I'm angry now, don't you?" I tried to get away from him.
"Shhh, avilepha," Kifirin kissed the back of my neck gently. "I was sleeping when you were birthed. I cannot go back and change any of that for you. What would you have done, love, if I told you that you were created to save the worlds? It would have frightened you. And overshadowed any happiness you might have had afterward. Tell me this is not so."
"What happiness?" I snapped, struggling against him. He wasn't letting me go. Yeah, I wasn't a long-suffering heroine. Far from it. Nobody would be singing my praises in any paperback novel, that's for sure.
"You have the opportunity now, love," Kifirin murmured against my throat. "Take it. Use me. Use your father. He would welcome the chance to make things up to you. Ask us for anything you want and if we can get it for you, it will be yours."
"I don't want things," I muttered, tears beginning to fall. "I just want somebody I can trust. Somebody who doesn't want to use me as a means to an end. I want to make up my own mind instead of having somebody telling me what I can do or where I can go, or with whom." Kifirin let me go then and I walked a short distance away from him, keeping my back to him as I wiped tears away.
"Your father and I will do our best to win your trust from this point forward," Kifirin said softly. "We thought we were saving the universes, little mate. We didn't. Our Lissa did it for us."
"Yeah. Just send your kid out to take the hit. Griffin has never been a parent to me. He just showed up one day, announcing he was my dear old Dad, missing in action all those years. He was only waiting for the right moment to snatch me away and toss me in front of an army of Ra'Ak, knowing I'd do the right thing. Does that sound about right? Would you treat your child like that, Kifirin? Would you?"
"Avilepha, it is over." Kifirin's beautiful face held agony—for both of us. "I know this pain is in you and it will be next to impossible to set it aside. Please try. For your own happiness, if not ours."
I looked around me, then, still wiping tears off my cheeks and seeing my surroundings with blurred vision. We stood in a high mountain meadow, and it was lovely there. Snowcapped peaks surrounded us, while tiny white flowers and long-stemmed grasses bloomed and grew at our feet. I had no way to tell where we were and I wasn't about to ask.
"So now what, Kifirin?" I asked, turning toward him. "You want me to go back and be Gardevik's cook for the rest of my life?" I flung up both arms hopelessly. "Wait on the fucking High Demons like a common servant? Is that what my life is going to be? I save their ass and they still expect me to cook?"
"You do not have to cook again unless that is your desire. If you wish for the High Demons to bow to you, then I will command it." Kifirin was the god now, standing in a high meadow, his face stern and full of power.
"You know I don't want that. I just want someplace to go where I can be left alone," I muttered. "I'm tired, Kifirin." I looked up at him; he'd come to stand before me. "Just tired. I still look like death warmed over and my haircut doesn't help."
"You are depressed." He lifted fingers to my face. When I didn't pull away from his touch, he reached down and lifted me up, encouraging me to wrap my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck. His hand was gentle as he rubbed light circles on my back while I clung to him. "I am here, avilepha. For you."
We were still connected—Kifirin and I. He was giving me mental words of love while he kissed me and the grass was soft beneath my back when he made my clothing disappear. My little love, you are so thin, his inner voice sounded sad. Have they starved you? I will never let that happen again. He ran his hands through my hair and it grew in his fingers. He kissed tears away, murmuring tender words. His lovemaking was passionate and gentle at the same time, as if he were afraid he might hurt me. Yes, I'd made love before while I wept, and I was doing it then, too.
* * *
"I desire to keep her safe while I tend to things," Kifirin said later. He'd appeared inside Merrill's study, a sleeping Lissa in his arms. She was dressed again, as was he, but he'd placed a healing sleep after he'd loved her. "Do not confine her; that will be too much. Provide companions or guards if you can and I will return soon."
Merrill was shocked—not only to see Kifirin, but to find Lissa in his arms. So much time had passed since she'd been inside his home. He rarely stayed there now; he had a place at Gryphon Hall, Adam Chessman's old family home, where Kiarra and Adam were and Pheligar came upon occasion. He used his old study for business—to find some time alone, here and there. Griffin and Amara stayed at Merrill's old manor now.
"She won't want to stay; Griffin is here," Merrill whispered as if he were afraid she might wake.
"He will have to make his own peace with her," Kifirin said softly. "She is very angry with him. She does not understand why or how a father could sacrifice his child."
"I don't understand it either." Merrill accepted Lissa's sleeping body into his arms. "I will take her to Grace and Dragon and the others. Radomir is there, as is Karzac, so there are three she knows in that house. Perhaps they can help her somehow. We won't ask anything of her that she isn't prepared to give."
"If she needs funds or anything else, I will reimburse you for whatever you spend," Kifirin said, stroking Lissa's cheek. "She is so pale and thin. I beg you to do something about that, too."
"She will never want for money," Merrill huffed. "Wlodek and I kept her assets before; he couldn't bear to take anything else from her, although we thought her dead. The investments were placed in my name when we forgot about her all those years. The accounts sat there, gathering interest. I invested it as well as I could, too. She will not have need for anything else."