Broken Dove
Page 151
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“But then he saw you.”
She studied me a moment before she declared, “You want me with him.”
I shook my head. “I want you to have what you want. What you deserve. I just can’t help but think that you wanted him before, very much so, and although I totally get why you wouldn’t want him now, I can’t forget how you felt before. But in the end”—I gave her hand another squeeze—“I just want you to be happy.”
“I…well…” she stammered then looked away and suddenly exclaimed, “Oh blast!”
“What?” I asked.
Her eyes came back to mine. “Now I’m angry he stopped.”
I blinked before I repeated, “What?”
“I am…I have…well, Miss Maddie, I must admit, I wanted to know this time his interest was genuine, was more, so I was”—she made an embarrassed scrunchy face—“testing him.”
Oh boy.
“And he gave up,” she continued.
Crap.
“Now I don’t know what to do,” she confided. “Because now he’s only doing what I told him to do, which is leave me be, and not doing what I want him to do, which is work to win me.”
“Do you want me to have a word with him?” I asked, hoping she didn’t because Hans liked me but I had a feeling he wouldn’t like me getting involved.
Still, I’d do it.
For my Loretta.
To which she immediately (and thankfully) cried, “No!”
“Okay,” I said hurriedly. “I won’t.”
“I’ve made a terrible mistake,” she declared. “He’s very handsome and he’s of a House and since Brunskar, when he wasn’t being bossy and annoying, he was very sweet. I was lucky to catch his eye in the first place.”
Oh no she didn’t.
“That’s where you’re absolutely wrong,” I told her. “He was lucky to earn your attention. You’re lovely, honey, every part of you. Inside and out.”
She smiled a small smile as her hand in mine squeezed but then the smile faded and she looked back to her knees.
“I don’t know what to do.”
“Well, I’m no relationship expert, not by a long shot,” I started and she looked back at me.
“A long shot?”
“A….well, let’s just say I’m not very good at this kind of thing,” I explained.
“But, Lord Apollo adores you.”
He did indeed.
I couldn’t bite back the grin that reminder caused, so I didn’t.
Then I kept on target.
“What I’m saying is, although I landed my guy, and he’s a good one, it was a bumpy road before that where I made some mistakes. So, take my advice knowing that. But I’m thinking you both need to quit playing games and get real.”
Her brows drew together. “Get real?”
“Talk to him. Share your feelings. Tell him how he hurt you before, explain you admire him and you don’t want a roll in the hay.” When she looked confused again, I stated, “Just bedplay. If he’s not interested, tell him you want to know that so you both can move on. But if this is more to him, then you’ll know.”
“He may be angry with me for playing these…games.”
“He might,” I agreed. “Then again, he might realize he bought that and suck it up.”
She stared at me. “Sometimes you speak very strangely, Miss Maddie.”
It sucked I had to keep the secret of who I really was from a friend and this was the kind of time when it sucked more.
Still, she couldn’t know so I couldn’t tell her.
Instead, I said, “We have different ways of saying things where I come from in the Vale.”
“I’ve noticed,” she murmured.
It was time to leave her alone, so I bumped my shoulder against hers and lifted our hands, doing this while offering, “If you ever need to talk about this kind of thing, or anything, I’m here. And if you don’t want to talk about it, that’s okay too. I just want you to know you have both from me. Yes?”
She smiled and this time it wasn’t small. “Yes, Miss Maddie.”
I smiled back. “Now, you sleep tight, sweetheart.”
“You too.”
I let her hand go but twisted to her to give her a hug. She gave it back. And when her arms closed around me, I wondered how I’d existed for so long in a life untouched by good people.
Then again, it didn’t matter.
Because I lived that life no longer.
I let her go, straightened from the bed and winked at her before I headed out the door.
When I got into the hall, I noticed Gaston was down at the other end and Lund was still at his position at the top of the stairs.
But as I moved toward my room, I also noticed one of the doors in the hall was cracked open.
It was Christophe’s.
I thought Apollo had left it open for some reason and was wondering why when I got closer and saw Christophe’s eye peering out the crack.
I looked quickly away, his position telling me he didn’t want to be caught peeking out, and made note to tell his father he was still awake and something was up as I walked by his door, pretending I didn’t know he was there.
I got two steps past it when I heard him call, “Miss Maddie.”
My heart jumped in my chest as I turned and saw he’d stuck his head out of the door.
His eyes were on me.
And he was addressing me.
Directly.
“Are you all right, Chris?” I asked.
His head turned to look toward the other end of the hall then he looked back to me.
“Did you talk Loretta into being with Hans?”
I stared at him, surprised at his question.
A question that laid testimony to the fact that Chris didn’t only watch his father, sister and me.
It would seem Chris paid attention to everything.
Then I forced myself to speak. “Um…well, no. Not exactly.”
He looked disappointed.
“She is…” I didn’t know what to share and decided on, “She has some issues.”
“Hans likes her,” he stated.
“Well, yes,” I replied.
“The handsome soldier is supposed to get the maiden he desires at the end of the story,” he declared and I felt my lips twitch as I fought back a smile.
“You’re absolutely right,” I told him.
“So what’s wrong with Loretta? She’s ruining the story,” he told me.
I again beat back my smile, doing it thinking that I wanted to walk to him. To get close. To crouch in front of him and hold his eyes when I spoke my next words.
She studied me a moment before she declared, “You want me with him.”
I shook my head. “I want you to have what you want. What you deserve. I just can’t help but think that you wanted him before, very much so, and although I totally get why you wouldn’t want him now, I can’t forget how you felt before. But in the end”—I gave her hand another squeeze—“I just want you to be happy.”
“I…well…” she stammered then looked away and suddenly exclaimed, “Oh blast!”
“What?” I asked.
Her eyes came back to mine. “Now I’m angry he stopped.”
I blinked before I repeated, “What?”
“I am…I have…well, Miss Maddie, I must admit, I wanted to know this time his interest was genuine, was more, so I was”—she made an embarrassed scrunchy face—“testing him.”
Oh boy.
“And he gave up,” she continued.
Crap.
“Now I don’t know what to do,” she confided. “Because now he’s only doing what I told him to do, which is leave me be, and not doing what I want him to do, which is work to win me.”
“Do you want me to have a word with him?” I asked, hoping she didn’t because Hans liked me but I had a feeling he wouldn’t like me getting involved.
Still, I’d do it.
For my Loretta.
To which she immediately (and thankfully) cried, “No!”
“Okay,” I said hurriedly. “I won’t.”
“I’ve made a terrible mistake,” she declared. “He’s very handsome and he’s of a House and since Brunskar, when he wasn’t being bossy and annoying, he was very sweet. I was lucky to catch his eye in the first place.”
Oh no she didn’t.
“That’s where you’re absolutely wrong,” I told her. “He was lucky to earn your attention. You’re lovely, honey, every part of you. Inside and out.”
She smiled a small smile as her hand in mine squeezed but then the smile faded and she looked back to her knees.
“I don’t know what to do.”
“Well, I’m no relationship expert, not by a long shot,” I started and she looked back at me.
“A long shot?”
“A….well, let’s just say I’m not very good at this kind of thing,” I explained.
“But, Lord Apollo adores you.”
He did indeed.
I couldn’t bite back the grin that reminder caused, so I didn’t.
Then I kept on target.
“What I’m saying is, although I landed my guy, and he’s a good one, it was a bumpy road before that where I made some mistakes. So, take my advice knowing that. But I’m thinking you both need to quit playing games and get real.”
Her brows drew together. “Get real?”
“Talk to him. Share your feelings. Tell him how he hurt you before, explain you admire him and you don’t want a roll in the hay.” When she looked confused again, I stated, “Just bedplay. If he’s not interested, tell him you want to know that so you both can move on. But if this is more to him, then you’ll know.”
“He may be angry with me for playing these…games.”
“He might,” I agreed. “Then again, he might realize he bought that and suck it up.”
She stared at me. “Sometimes you speak very strangely, Miss Maddie.”
It sucked I had to keep the secret of who I really was from a friend and this was the kind of time when it sucked more.
Still, she couldn’t know so I couldn’t tell her.
Instead, I said, “We have different ways of saying things where I come from in the Vale.”
“I’ve noticed,” she murmured.
It was time to leave her alone, so I bumped my shoulder against hers and lifted our hands, doing this while offering, “If you ever need to talk about this kind of thing, or anything, I’m here. And if you don’t want to talk about it, that’s okay too. I just want you to know you have both from me. Yes?”
She smiled and this time it wasn’t small. “Yes, Miss Maddie.”
I smiled back. “Now, you sleep tight, sweetheart.”
“You too.”
I let her hand go but twisted to her to give her a hug. She gave it back. And when her arms closed around me, I wondered how I’d existed for so long in a life untouched by good people.
Then again, it didn’t matter.
Because I lived that life no longer.
I let her go, straightened from the bed and winked at her before I headed out the door.
When I got into the hall, I noticed Gaston was down at the other end and Lund was still at his position at the top of the stairs.
But as I moved toward my room, I also noticed one of the doors in the hall was cracked open.
It was Christophe’s.
I thought Apollo had left it open for some reason and was wondering why when I got closer and saw Christophe’s eye peering out the crack.
I looked quickly away, his position telling me he didn’t want to be caught peeking out, and made note to tell his father he was still awake and something was up as I walked by his door, pretending I didn’t know he was there.
I got two steps past it when I heard him call, “Miss Maddie.”
My heart jumped in my chest as I turned and saw he’d stuck his head out of the door.
His eyes were on me.
And he was addressing me.
Directly.
“Are you all right, Chris?” I asked.
His head turned to look toward the other end of the hall then he looked back to me.
“Did you talk Loretta into being with Hans?”
I stared at him, surprised at his question.
A question that laid testimony to the fact that Chris didn’t only watch his father, sister and me.
It would seem Chris paid attention to everything.
Then I forced myself to speak. “Um…well, no. Not exactly.”
He looked disappointed.
“She is…” I didn’t know what to share and decided on, “She has some issues.”
“Hans likes her,” he stated.
“Well, yes,” I replied.
“The handsome soldier is supposed to get the maiden he desires at the end of the story,” he declared and I felt my lips twitch as I fought back a smile.
“You’re absolutely right,” I told him.
“So what’s wrong with Loretta? She’s ruining the story,” he told me.
I again beat back my smile, doing it thinking that I wanted to walk to him. To get close. To crouch in front of him and hold his eyes when I spoke my next words.