I never understood why she couldn’t see through the lies, but now I wonder if maybe she wanted to believe in love so badly that she convinced herself that her slimy boyfriend was telling the truth, just so she could have someone around.
“Of course you’re going to deny it. What else are you going to say?” I let out a shaky breath. “Let’s just forget this ever happened.”
“You really think I could forget this?” His voice is low, edgy. “You kissed me back. You still want me.”
“Don’t flatter yourself. I would’ve kissed anyone just now. Did kiss anyone. Remember? If it was Wade here and not you, I’d be kissing him instead.”
Reed frowns. “Wade’s a good guy. Don’t break his heart to get back at me. That’s not who you are.”
“You don’t know who I am.”
“Yeah, I do. You said it yourself—I see you. I see your hurt and your loneliness. I see your pride, and the way it stops you from leaning on anyone. I see your big heart, and how you want to save the world, including an ass like me.” His voice catches. “I’m done playing games, Ella. No other girls exist in this world for me. If you see me talking to one, know that I’m talking about you. If you see me walking next to someone, I’m wishing it was you.” He steps toward me. “You’re the only one for me.”
“I don’t believe you.”
“How can I change your mind?”
I push at him. He’s standing way too close to me, and I need distance.
“Do you want me to beg? Because I’ll do that.” He starts to lower himself to the ground.
“Dude! Royal’s whipped,” a loud voice crows. The comment is followed by a whip sound and lots of drunken laughter. A group of guys stumble past us on their way to the side of the mansion.
I grab Reed before he can hit his knees. As much as I hate him, I hate the Astor kids more. But Reed doesn’t seem bothered at all that these jerks overheard him. He just smirks and flips up his middle finger.
Tears prick my eyes, and I avert my face so he can’t see them. “I hate this place,” I whisper. “Astor is officially the stupidest school in the entire world.”
Silence weighs heavy between us until he sighs deeply. “Come on. I’ll take you home.”
Since my car is disgustingly out of commission, I slump in defeat and climb into his SUV, but I make sure to sit as far away from him as possible.
“What happened to your jersey?” he asks gruffly. “It’s soaking wet.”
“Jordan happened.”
His hands tighten around the wheel. “I’ll deal with her.”
“How?”
“You let me worry about that.”
I stare out the window and shut down the flutters of hope that are trying to rise in my heart. This is Reed Royal. He’s a guy who screwed his dad’s girlfriend. He has no morals or principles. All he cares about is what he can get for himself.
So no, I won’t allow myself to hope. My heart can’t take it. Not again.
18
Reed
Winning my girl back is taking longer than I thought it would. And it’s harder, too. I thought that the kiss at Shea’s party signaled a change of heart. If anything, it ended up having the opposite effect. Ella still doesn’t believe me, and short of a DNA test, I don’t know how I’m going to convince her.
Dad hasn’t mentioned a paternity test, but he’s got to be getting one, right? He can’t tie himself to that snake without some kind of proof.
I spent the entire miserable weekend getting ignored by everyone in the family except my dad and Brooke. Ella, Easton, the twins, Gid. They’re all pissed at me.
Don’t get me wrong, I deserve it. One hundred percent. Sleeping with Brooke was the stupidest decision I ever made. The fact that I’ve always been choosy as hell when it comes to chicks makes it even worse, because someone like Brooke shouldn’t have made the short list. I should’ve resisted her. I should’ve resisted the urge to punish my dad. I know from experience that every boneheaded thing I do only ends with me punishing myself.
But I did it and I can’t change that. I can hate myself for it, I can feel like shit every time I remember it, but I can’t rewrite the past.
And Ella can’t hold it against me forever, right?
“You’re staring.”
I turn to find Wade rolling his eyes at me. Yeah. Busted. I was totally staring at Ella’s table. She’s sitting with Val on the opposite side of the dining hall, and I know she chose that spot on purpose. She’s putting as much distance between us as humanly possible.
And she positioned her chair so that her back is to the room. To me. She wants me to know it’s over, but we both know it’s not. She hated me before and still fell for me. Nothing’s really changed between us. We’re still sparring, still circling each other like well-matched opponents, but we’re there, in the ring, together. And that’s all that matters.
“I’m allowed to stare.” I scowl at him. “You, on the other hand, are not. So keep your eyes off my girl. Your lips, too.”
He just grins. “Hey, it’s not my fault she shoved her tongue in my mouth.”
I growl. “Bring it up again and I’ll lay you out.”
“You’d never hurt your quarterback,” Wade taunts, laughing as he rises from his chair. “I’ll catch you bros later. Got someone waiting for me in the bathroom.”
All the guys roll their eyes. Wade is notorious for his bathroom hookups.
“Hey, East,” someone else says from the other end of the table. “Heard you hooked up with Savannah Montgomery.”
I jolt upright. Seriously? First Abby, and now Sav?
When Abby pulled me aside at the party, it was to apologize for hooking up with East. She claimed she was mad at me and that it was her way of lashing out. It was hard to stop myself from saying I don’t give a damn who you screw. But it’s true, I don’t. I was over Abby even before Ella entered the picture, and I honestly don’t care who she sleeps with.
What I do care about is East. My brother’s out of control and there’s nothing I can do to stop it. That’s what keeps me up at night. Well, that, and Ella.
“Of course you’re going to deny it. What else are you going to say?” I let out a shaky breath. “Let’s just forget this ever happened.”
“You really think I could forget this?” His voice is low, edgy. “You kissed me back. You still want me.”
“Don’t flatter yourself. I would’ve kissed anyone just now. Did kiss anyone. Remember? If it was Wade here and not you, I’d be kissing him instead.”
Reed frowns. “Wade’s a good guy. Don’t break his heart to get back at me. That’s not who you are.”
“You don’t know who I am.”
“Yeah, I do. You said it yourself—I see you. I see your hurt and your loneliness. I see your pride, and the way it stops you from leaning on anyone. I see your big heart, and how you want to save the world, including an ass like me.” His voice catches. “I’m done playing games, Ella. No other girls exist in this world for me. If you see me talking to one, know that I’m talking about you. If you see me walking next to someone, I’m wishing it was you.” He steps toward me. “You’re the only one for me.”
“I don’t believe you.”
“How can I change your mind?”
I push at him. He’s standing way too close to me, and I need distance.
“Do you want me to beg? Because I’ll do that.” He starts to lower himself to the ground.
“Dude! Royal’s whipped,” a loud voice crows. The comment is followed by a whip sound and lots of drunken laughter. A group of guys stumble past us on their way to the side of the mansion.
I grab Reed before he can hit his knees. As much as I hate him, I hate the Astor kids more. But Reed doesn’t seem bothered at all that these jerks overheard him. He just smirks and flips up his middle finger.
Tears prick my eyes, and I avert my face so he can’t see them. “I hate this place,” I whisper. “Astor is officially the stupidest school in the entire world.”
Silence weighs heavy between us until he sighs deeply. “Come on. I’ll take you home.”
Since my car is disgustingly out of commission, I slump in defeat and climb into his SUV, but I make sure to sit as far away from him as possible.
“What happened to your jersey?” he asks gruffly. “It’s soaking wet.”
“Jordan happened.”
His hands tighten around the wheel. “I’ll deal with her.”
“How?”
“You let me worry about that.”
I stare out the window and shut down the flutters of hope that are trying to rise in my heart. This is Reed Royal. He’s a guy who screwed his dad’s girlfriend. He has no morals or principles. All he cares about is what he can get for himself.
So no, I won’t allow myself to hope. My heart can’t take it. Not again.
18
Reed
Winning my girl back is taking longer than I thought it would. And it’s harder, too. I thought that the kiss at Shea’s party signaled a change of heart. If anything, it ended up having the opposite effect. Ella still doesn’t believe me, and short of a DNA test, I don’t know how I’m going to convince her.
Dad hasn’t mentioned a paternity test, but he’s got to be getting one, right? He can’t tie himself to that snake without some kind of proof.
I spent the entire miserable weekend getting ignored by everyone in the family except my dad and Brooke. Ella, Easton, the twins, Gid. They’re all pissed at me.
Don’t get me wrong, I deserve it. One hundred percent. Sleeping with Brooke was the stupidest decision I ever made. The fact that I’ve always been choosy as hell when it comes to chicks makes it even worse, because someone like Brooke shouldn’t have made the short list. I should’ve resisted her. I should’ve resisted the urge to punish my dad. I know from experience that every boneheaded thing I do only ends with me punishing myself.
But I did it and I can’t change that. I can hate myself for it, I can feel like shit every time I remember it, but I can’t rewrite the past.
And Ella can’t hold it against me forever, right?
“You’re staring.”
I turn to find Wade rolling his eyes at me. Yeah. Busted. I was totally staring at Ella’s table. She’s sitting with Val on the opposite side of the dining hall, and I know she chose that spot on purpose. She’s putting as much distance between us as humanly possible.
And she positioned her chair so that her back is to the room. To me. She wants me to know it’s over, but we both know it’s not. She hated me before and still fell for me. Nothing’s really changed between us. We’re still sparring, still circling each other like well-matched opponents, but we’re there, in the ring, together. And that’s all that matters.
“I’m allowed to stare.” I scowl at him. “You, on the other hand, are not. So keep your eyes off my girl. Your lips, too.”
He just grins. “Hey, it’s not my fault she shoved her tongue in my mouth.”
I growl. “Bring it up again and I’ll lay you out.”
“You’d never hurt your quarterback,” Wade taunts, laughing as he rises from his chair. “I’ll catch you bros later. Got someone waiting for me in the bathroom.”
All the guys roll their eyes. Wade is notorious for his bathroom hookups.
“Hey, East,” someone else says from the other end of the table. “Heard you hooked up with Savannah Montgomery.”
I jolt upright. Seriously? First Abby, and now Sav?
When Abby pulled me aside at the party, it was to apologize for hooking up with East. She claimed she was mad at me and that it was her way of lashing out. It was hard to stop myself from saying I don’t give a damn who you screw. But it’s true, I don’t. I was over Abby even before Ella entered the picture, and I honestly don’t care who she sleeps with.
What I do care about is East. My brother’s out of control and there’s nothing I can do to stop it. That’s what keeps me up at night. Well, that, and Ella.
