Carnal Secrets
Page 5

He winced. “I was hoping I wouldn’t need to use them…but I can’t say I don’t like the look of them on you. Notice that I didn’t pin them behind your back. I don’t want you uncomfortable. I just want us to be able to talk without you grabbing a bat and swinging it at my head.”
“Thanks for the small mercy,” she spat with heavy sarcasm.
Wearing a forlorn, hopeless expression that plucked at Nick’s heart, she dropped her head and her shoulders sagged. Then she was sniffling. Shit. Guilt prickled his skin. He did the only thing he could do. He rose from his seat and went to her. Shocking the shit out of him, she suddenly sprang to life; she stomped hard on his foot, used her wrists tied in front of her to deliver a mean blow to his jaw, and then kicked his kneecap hard, making him stagger backward. Before Nick could reach for her, she was up and heading for the kitchen.
Nick should have been pissed—not only had she played him by acting the sad, stoic victim accepting of her fate, she had run from him. Instead, he found himself smiling at her deviousness. He could respect deviousness.
He was going to catch her. Shaya knew it. That didn’t mean she was just going to lie back and take this shit. That wasn’t who she was. Still, it was no more than five seconds later when a hard body folded itself around her from behind and she was tackled to the hardwood floor, pinned onto her stomach with her arms squashed beneath her. This was familiar. “Get off me, you son of a bitch!”
“You’re fast, I’ll give you that.” Nick grunted as she jammed her elbow into his rib cage. He placed more of his body weight down on her, but if anything, that only intensified her struggles. “There’s no point in doing this, baby. Stop.”
She snickered, forcing herself to ignore the authority in his voice. “Fuck you!” She reared her head back, smirking as it connected hard with his forehead, and he cursed again. When wooziness momentarily came over her, she realized that that might not have been wise.
“Christ, woman, will you stop!” That move had hurt like a bitch. Ignoring the trickle of blood he could feel spilling from the top of his forehead, Nick trapped her cuffed wrists above her head. “I swear if you don’t stop struggling, Shay, I’ll spank your ass.” She didn’t stop. Of course she didn’t stop. So he slid his free hand down to rest on her ass. Well, “rest on” wasn’t quite accurate. More like he’d cupped her ass. He could say with all honestly that it was the hottest ass he’d had the pleasure of touching.
“What the f**k?” Shaya wished she felt as outraged as she sounded.
“Stop trying to fight me or I will spank you. Don’t test me.” He was hoping she did. “I never make a threat that I don’t intend to follow through.” Did she stop? No. She tried to head-butt him again. Nick tsked and sharply brought his hand down on her ass, smiling when she gasped and froze. “I told you not to test me. Or maybe you wanted me to do it.” He placed his mouth to her ear and spoke in a teasing tone. “Maybe you like that. It’ll be no hardship for me to spank you again, so if you don’t like it, quit fighting me.”
As much as she hated to acknowledge it, there was no way that Shaya could get out from under him. She was just so tired, and he was so strong, the a**hole. Her wolf lowered her head and tail, acknowledging his dominance. Shaya couldn’t bring herself to openly admit defeat to him, so rather than speaking she simply went lax beneath him.
“Very good.” Nick’s voice was thick with the lust he felt at watching her submit. “Now, we’re going to slowly stand up.” He should have known that she’d try to run again. He should have expected it merely because the female could clearly be counted on to do the exact opposite of what he told her. Being much faster than she was, he caught her easily enough, looping an arm around her and pulling her back against him. “Now that wasn’t very good behavior, was it?” The crazy bitch bit into his arm, kicking him wildly. Grunting, he slung her over his shoulder and landed a harsh slap on her ass as he stalked back to the living room.
Shaya’s outraged gasp turned into a lengthy growl. “Put me down, you a**hole!” She clawed at the skin of his lower back.
“Just so you know, I like it rough. But I should point out something. You’ve used your claws and teeth a few times on me. If you do it again even once—whether it’s out of anger or not—my wolf is finally going to rise to that and push me to mark you right back. With the mating urges beating at me and your scent wrapped around me and your skin under my hands, I know for a fact that I won’t be able to resist biting you any longer. If you don’t want that, stop.”
The warning had been delivered in such a soft, sensual, velvety voice that a tremor rippled through Shaya. She hated knowing he’d feel her need for him.
Returning her to the sofa, Nick looked down into Shaya’s snarling face and sighed inwardly. She was beyond pissed, which was the last thing he wanted. Conscious of the blood trickling down his forehead, he snatched a tissue from the box on the coffee table and used it to stanch the flow.
Realizing she was scowling at him, Shaya lowered her eyes—a submissive wolf wouldn’t be able to hold an angry dominant’s powerful gaze for very long. However, she wasn’t an average submissive. There were things about her that many people didn’t know. But as she had no wish to tell him, she forced herself to look away. “You’ll regret this, Beavis.”
“I’ll remember to watch my back,” he said with a smile.
“Oh no. When I come at you, I’ll come at you from the front.”
Her sassy response made his smile widen. “That’s my girl.” Sitting on the armchair again, he watched as she struggled against the cuffs. Sighing, he dug out the key from his pocket and unlocked them. At her suspicious look, he shrugged. “I think at this point you’re as tired of all the running around as I am…although it was fun to chase and spank you.”
“Had you honestly expected me to be quiet and compliant like a good little girl? I might be submissive, but I’m not a pushover.”
“Oh, you’re definitely not a pushover,” he agreed. “I never, for even one minute, thought that you were.” She had the strength of will to match any dominant female, to match his.
“You can’t ignore me for months and then expect me to welcome you with open arms.”
“I didn’t ignore you—”
“You didn’t even look at me, let alone speak to me or—”
“Because I didn’t trust myself not to pick you up and carry you off.” He sighed. “You’re not dumb, Shay. You know that your being submissive is a problem. If the situation was reversed and claiming me would put me in danger, what would you have done?”
“Talked to you. I’d have talked to you and explained how I felt. If I hadn’t thought that there was a way I could be with you, I’d have given you the space to live your life, but you couldn’t even give me that.”
He arched a brow. “Are you going to tell me that you’re not feeling the same pull as I am? That your wolf isn’t hounding you? That the urge to mate isn’t close to controlling you? I can see you shaking with it, Shay. So don’t make out like staying away from you should be simple for me. It never was.” He inhaled deeply, wanting that scent he’d missed to be nestled deep in his lungs. God, she smelled like the ocean, fresh crisp air, and home. He had to fist his hands to keep from touching her. It was painful to resist.
He took a calming breath, inhaling deeply again. And that was when he smelled it—her arousal. It was the sweetest smell that seemed designed to torture both him and his wolf. He wanted to find out if her taste was just as alluring. His wolf was clawing at him, growling at his lack of action, at not claiming what was theirs.
“My name is Shaya. And yes, I do feel that same pull. Yes, the urges are a pain in the ass. And that’s exactly why you’re here—for the wrong reasons. Not because you truly want me, but because your wolf’s pushing you too hard and the urges are bugging you too much. Well that’s not good enough for me.”
“I stepped down from Alpha.”
She was so startled she couldn’t speak for a few seconds. “What?”
“My old Beta is now Alpha.”
She’d met his old Beta a few times, sensed his very dominant wolf, and she’d sensed something else too—extremely dominant or not, Jon was nowhere near as powerful as Nick. She wasn’t sure whether or not he was lying about having stepped down from Alpha, but she knew one thing: “Your wolf wouldn’t be able to take orders from someone less powerful than he is—he wouldn’t obey him. Plus, everyone in your pack would still see you as the person to go to and answer to because you’re more powerful than Jon.”
“I know. That’s why I left.”
She gawked. “What?”
He spread his arms wide before crossing them behind his head and leaning back in his seat. “I’m now a lone wolf.”
Her mouth bobbed open and closed a few times. What he’d done wasn’t by any means a small thing. Not that she believed Nick had ever or would ever actually need anyone, but to be without a pack or territory or the social contact provided by a pack would be hard as all shit for any shifter. If Shaya hadn’t been half human, she was pretty sure the lone-wolf lifestyle would have been too much for her to handle. As it was, she found it pretty difficult, but that wasn’t so much to do with her shifter side as it was to do with her issue with being alone. “But…why?”
“Because if being Alpha means I can’t have you, then I don’t want the position. You’re what I want.”
Struggling to think clearly, she got to her feet and began to pace. She honestly didn’t know what to say, what to do. Here he was, claiming to have made some major changes to his life just for her. Hell, he’d left his pack, his family, his territory, and his position behind! She would have been impressed, but it made no sense. If she had really been so important to him, he would have done this in the very beginning…which made her wonder if this was nothing more than a grand gesture. Even if he truly intended to never return to his pack, she very much doubted that it would work for him or his wolf. It would only be a matter of time before the urge to go back became too much.
He rose from the chair and went to her. “Come back to California with me. I don’t have to tell you how dangerous it is to be a lone shifter right now—the human extremists are making themselves a huge problem. So if you want to return to the Phoenix Pack, fine, I’ll go with you. I won’t lie—obeying Trey would be hard because I’m as powerful as he is, but as he’s not weaker than me, it could still work. Come with me.”
Shaya looked at the hand he held out to her and swallowed hard. She could admit to herself that the temptation to go with him was like nothing she’d ever felt. Six months ago, she’d have given anything to hear those words. But not now. It was too late; betrayal still sat like lead in the pit of her stomach. She shook her head. “You walked away from me.”
“And you ran from me.” He slowly reached out and gently straightened one of her red corkscrew curls, watching with an inner smile as it bounced back into place. It took him by surprise how soft and silky her hair was. “But it was the best thing you could have done.” At her questioning look, he elaborated. “It made me realize a few things. Namely that living without you isn’t an option.”
“Because the urges won’t ease.”
“Because you’re more important than anything else,” he corrected, taking a step toward her so that there was only a hairbreadth between them. As her scent wrapped around him, he barely resisted the temptation to bury his face into the crook of her neck. “I’ve missed your scent. It drives me crazy.” Drinking in every detail of her face, he smoothed the pad of his thumb across her cheekbone. “I’ve missed looking at you. Watching you.”
She told herself to step back, but it simply didn’t happen. As if the mating urges weren’t enough to deal with, she now had his scent—the guy smelled like cedar, cinnamon, danger, and a dark masculinity—swirling around her. The scent caressed her senses and made her tingle all over. Finally her legs began to work, and she backed away, shaking her head. “I want you to leave.”
His wolf growled at not only her words but the distance she’d created between them. Nick quickly closed it. “I can’t do that. Six months I’ve searched for you. Six f**king long months. I didn’t do it just to walk away from you.”
She snorted. “Why? You did it easily enough the first time.”
“Nothing about it was easy.” He ran his hand through her curls, glad when she didn’t step away. “You’re so full of life, and I’m broken and jaded, so you deserve better. But I’ve discovered that I’m not selfless enough to leave you alone.” Resting his forehead against hers, he cupped her neck and began breezing his thumb up and down the column of her throat. “I’m a bastard for what I put you through, and I’m sorry. I won’t let you down again, I promise. Just come with me.”
Her chest ached at the plea in his eyes—eyes that always looked so haunted and shadowed that it made her wonder what he’d been through that had stained them that way. His thumb traveled up to her mouth and traced the outline of her lips as if he was claiming them. Shaya had every intention of pushing him away. Any second now she would do it.
“Since the first day I saw you, I’ve wondered if your lips are as soft as they look.” A low growl rumbled up his chest when she nervously licked her bottom lip, making him want to do the same. She had the most enticing mouth—soft, sensual, and plush. He realized he wasn’t going to be able to move without tasting it. “And I’ve wondered if you taste as good as you smell.”