Chesapeake Blue
Page 73
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Whatever there was of Gloria inside him had been drowned out by the decency and pride and compassion given to him by the Quinns.
Maybe that alone was part of the reason she hated him—hated all of them. It didn't matter why. She was part of his life, and he had to deal with her.
One way or the other.
He sat drinking by that single light in a room filled with his paintings and the tools of the work he loved. He'd already made his decision, and he would live with it. But for tonight, he'd cloud his future with Irish whiskey and the throb of the mournful blues he'd chosen as his drinking music. When his cell phone rang he ignored it. Picked up the bottle, poured another shot.
* * * * *
DRU HUNG up and paced her living room. She'd tried Seth's number half a dozen times, had worn a path on the floor over the last two hours. Since Aubrey had called, looking for him. He wasn't with Aubrey, as he'd told Dru he would be that evening. Nor was he with Dru—as he'd told Aubrey and his family he would be.
So where the hell was he?
He'd been off. Something had been off, she decided, since the night before. Even before the party, she thought now. Before the drive. There'd been some kind of repressed violence in him—viciously repressed, she realized. It had, eventually, taken its form in rough sex.
And even then, after they'd exhausted each other, she'd sensed an underlying turbulence. She'd let it go, Dru admitted. It wasn't in her nature to pry. She resented the way her parents questioned and picked apart her every mood. Moods, she liked to think, were often private matters. Now he'd lied to her. That, she felt strongly, was not his nature.
If something was wrong, she needed to help. Wasn't that part of the duty of love?
She checked her watch, barely stopped herself from wringing her hands. It was after midnight. What if he was hurt? What if he'd been in an accident?
And what if he'd simply wanted an evening to himself?
"If he did, he should have said so," she mumbled and marched to the door. There was one place she imagined he could be. She wasn't going to rest until she checked. On the drive into town she lectured herself. Her relationship with Seth didn't mean he had to account to her for every minute of his time. They both had lives, interests, obligations of their own. She certainly wasn't the sort of woman who couldn't be content and productive with her own company. But that didn't give him the right to lie to her about his plans for the evening. If he'd just answer his goddamn phone, she wouldn't be driving into town in the middle of the night to look for him like some clichéd, nagging sitcom wife.
And she was going to ream him inside out for making her feel like one.
She'd worked up a good head of steam by the time she turned toward the rear lot and saw his car parked. The insult of it nearly had her driving right past and back home again. He couldn't have told her, and everyone else, that he'd wanted to work? He couldn't just pick up the phone and…
She slammed on the brakes.
What if he couldn't get to the phone? What if he was unable to answer because he was unconscious, or ill?
She whipped the car into the lot, leaped out and charged up the stairs.
The image of him lying helpless on the floor was so strong that when she burst in, saw him sitting on the bed pouring liquor from a bottle into a short glass, it didn't register.
"You're all right." The relief came first, made her knees weak. "Oh, Seth, God! I was so worried."
"What for?" He set the bottle down, studied her out of bleary eyes as he drank.
"Nobody knew where…" Realization came next, made her blood boil. "You're drunk."
"Working on it. Got a ways to go yet. What're you doing here?"
"Aubrey called looking for you hours ago. Your stories got crossed. Since you didn't answer your phone, I was foolish enough to worry about you."
He was still much too sober. Sober enough to consider her mood could make it easier on both of them.
"If you came running in here hoping to catch me in bed with another woman, I'm sorry to disappoint you."
"It never occurred to me that you would cheat." Nearly as baffled as she was angry, she walked toward the bed, noted the level of whiskey in the bottle. "Then again, it never crossed my mind that you'd need to lie to me either. Or that you'd sit here alone drinking yourself drunk."
"Told you there's a lot you don't know about me, sugar." He jerked a thumb at the bottle. "Want one?
Glasses in the kitchen."
"No, thank you. Is there a reason you're worrying your family and having a drinking marathon?"
"I'm a big boy, Dru, and I don't need you crawling up my ass because I want a couple drinks. This is more my style than a couple polite belts of champagne at some boring political gala. You can't deal with it, it's not my problem."
It stung, and had her chin lifting. "I was obliged to go. You weren't. That choice was yours. You want to drown yourself in a whiskey bottle, that's certainly your choice as well. But I won't be lied to. I won't be made a fool of."
He gave a careless shrug and, riding on the whiskey, decided he knew what was best for her. A few more jabs to the pride, he thought, and she'd be gone.
"You know the problem with women? You sleep with them a few times, you tell them what they want to hear. You show them a good time. Right away, they start crowding you. Take a little breather, and they're all over you like lice on a monkey. Jesus, I knew I should never've gone to that deal with you last night. Told myself it'd give you ideas."
"Ideas?" she repeated. She felt her throat fill and burn. " Ideas?"
"Can't just let things be, can you?" He shook his head, poured another drink. "Always got to be looking ahead. What's the deal for tomorrow, what's going to happen next week? You're plotting out a future, sugar, and that's just not what I'm about. You're a hell of a lot of fun to be with once you loosen up, but we'd better quit while we're ahead."
"You—you're dumping me?"
"Aw now, don't put it like that, sweetheart. We just need to throttle back some." Grief rolled up, and numbed her. "All this, all this was just for, what, for sex and art? I don't believe that. I don't."
"Let's not make a big thing out of it." He reached for the bottle again. Poured whiskey onto whiskey. Anything to keep from looking at her, at the tears swimming in her eyes.
Maybe that alone was part of the reason she hated him—hated all of them. It didn't matter why. She was part of his life, and he had to deal with her.
One way or the other.
He sat drinking by that single light in a room filled with his paintings and the tools of the work he loved. He'd already made his decision, and he would live with it. But for tonight, he'd cloud his future with Irish whiskey and the throb of the mournful blues he'd chosen as his drinking music. When his cell phone rang he ignored it. Picked up the bottle, poured another shot.
* * * * *
DRU HUNG up and paced her living room. She'd tried Seth's number half a dozen times, had worn a path on the floor over the last two hours. Since Aubrey had called, looking for him. He wasn't with Aubrey, as he'd told Dru he would be that evening. Nor was he with Dru—as he'd told Aubrey and his family he would be.
So where the hell was he?
He'd been off. Something had been off, she decided, since the night before. Even before the party, she thought now. Before the drive. There'd been some kind of repressed violence in him—viciously repressed, she realized. It had, eventually, taken its form in rough sex.
And even then, after they'd exhausted each other, she'd sensed an underlying turbulence. She'd let it go, Dru admitted. It wasn't in her nature to pry. She resented the way her parents questioned and picked apart her every mood. Moods, she liked to think, were often private matters. Now he'd lied to her. That, she felt strongly, was not his nature.
If something was wrong, she needed to help. Wasn't that part of the duty of love?
She checked her watch, barely stopped herself from wringing her hands. It was after midnight. What if he was hurt? What if he'd been in an accident?
And what if he'd simply wanted an evening to himself?
"If he did, he should have said so," she mumbled and marched to the door. There was one place she imagined he could be. She wasn't going to rest until she checked. On the drive into town she lectured herself. Her relationship with Seth didn't mean he had to account to her for every minute of his time. They both had lives, interests, obligations of their own. She certainly wasn't the sort of woman who couldn't be content and productive with her own company. But that didn't give him the right to lie to her about his plans for the evening. If he'd just answer his goddamn phone, she wouldn't be driving into town in the middle of the night to look for him like some clichéd, nagging sitcom wife.
And she was going to ream him inside out for making her feel like one.
She'd worked up a good head of steam by the time she turned toward the rear lot and saw his car parked. The insult of it nearly had her driving right past and back home again. He couldn't have told her, and everyone else, that he'd wanted to work? He couldn't just pick up the phone and…
She slammed on the brakes.
What if he couldn't get to the phone? What if he was unable to answer because he was unconscious, or ill?
She whipped the car into the lot, leaped out and charged up the stairs.
The image of him lying helpless on the floor was so strong that when she burst in, saw him sitting on the bed pouring liquor from a bottle into a short glass, it didn't register.
"You're all right." The relief came first, made her knees weak. "Oh, Seth, God! I was so worried."
"What for?" He set the bottle down, studied her out of bleary eyes as he drank.
"Nobody knew where…" Realization came next, made her blood boil. "You're drunk."
"Working on it. Got a ways to go yet. What're you doing here?"
"Aubrey called looking for you hours ago. Your stories got crossed. Since you didn't answer your phone, I was foolish enough to worry about you."
He was still much too sober. Sober enough to consider her mood could make it easier on both of them.
"If you came running in here hoping to catch me in bed with another woman, I'm sorry to disappoint you."
"It never occurred to me that you would cheat." Nearly as baffled as she was angry, she walked toward the bed, noted the level of whiskey in the bottle. "Then again, it never crossed my mind that you'd need to lie to me either. Or that you'd sit here alone drinking yourself drunk."
"Told you there's a lot you don't know about me, sugar." He jerked a thumb at the bottle. "Want one?
Glasses in the kitchen."
"No, thank you. Is there a reason you're worrying your family and having a drinking marathon?"
"I'm a big boy, Dru, and I don't need you crawling up my ass because I want a couple drinks. This is more my style than a couple polite belts of champagne at some boring political gala. You can't deal with it, it's not my problem."
It stung, and had her chin lifting. "I was obliged to go. You weren't. That choice was yours. You want to drown yourself in a whiskey bottle, that's certainly your choice as well. But I won't be lied to. I won't be made a fool of."
He gave a careless shrug and, riding on the whiskey, decided he knew what was best for her. A few more jabs to the pride, he thought, and she'd be gone.
"You know the problem with women? You sleep with them a few times, you tell them what they want to hear. You show them a good time. Right away, they start crowding you. Take a little breather, and they're all over you like lice on a monkey. Jesus, I knew I should never've gone to that deal with you last night. Told myself it'd give you ideas."
"Ideas?" she repeated. She felt her throat fill and burn. " Ideas?"
"Can't just let things be, can you?" He shook his head, poured another drink. "Always got to be looking ahead. What's the deal for tomorrow, what's going to happen next week? You're plotting out a future, sugar, and that's just not what I'm about. You're a hell of a lot of fun to be with once you loosen up, but we'd better quit while we're ahead."
"You—you're dumping me?"
"Aw now, don't put it like that, sweetheart. We just need to throttle back some." Grief rolled up, and numbed her. "All this, all this was just for, what, for sex and art? I don't believe that. I don't."
"Let's not make a big thing out of it." He reached for the bottle again. Poured whiskey onto whiskey. Anything to keep from looking at her, at the tears swimming in her eyes.
