Tessa had bent down and kissed him, her lips cool from the wine. “You should have told me,” she’d whispered. “Peter wanted me to find someone else, would have gladly given me a divorce if he’d known. And as I’ve told you, he pushed me in that direction over and over.”
Ian had given a firm shake of his head. “And I’ve told you, love, that it had to happen this way between us. You had to come to me of your own free will, because it was what you wanted. You were so shy and innocent back then it would have taken very little to try and seduce you. But that’s not the way I wanted you, Tessa. So everything unfolded exactly the way it was meant to. However, when I learned that you were having lunch with your ex-husband today, it brought all of those old feelings of mine back - the desperation, the hopelessness. In my mind, Peter was always the one thing standing in the way of you and I being together. Having him back in town, even temporarily, is a reminder of those two very long years I longed for you in silence.”
“But I’m yours now,” she’d reminded him, flashing her engagement ring. “Even without this ring or any sort of vows or promises, I’d be yours. Peter will never, ever be any sort of threat, will never come between us. And he’s only here for three more days, Ian, before he heads back to Bahrain. It would make me very, very happy if you’d agree to join us for dinner. Please?”
He’d set his wine glass down before pulling her close and tumbling her back onto the pillows. Teasingly, he had run a finger down the bridge of her nose before giving it a playful little pinch.
“You know I can never say no to you,” he’d admitted. “And especially when you ask so sweetly. So, yes, I’ll go along. Provided that Peter is okay with it.”
Tessa had nodded happily. “I’ll check with him, but I can’t imagine why he wouldn’t agree. Thank you, Ian. This means a lot to me.”
He’d dropped a kiss on her forehead. “Anything to make you happy, love.”
She had smiled up at him, her hands running caressingly up and down his arms and shoulders. “You make me happy. Just by being close. And especially being this close.” A more sober expression had crossed her lovely face then. “You know, I doubt I would have been even half as understanding or accepting as you’ve been about Peter if the situation was reversed. You’ve explained about your relationship with Davina to me, but when I met her in London last month it was pretty obvious that she still cares for you. I would have been a raving jealous witch if you’d had lunch with her.”
He had cupped her cheek in his hand tenderly. “That wouldn’t have happened,” he’d assured her. “Unlike you and Peter, Davina and I most certainly did not part as friends. I doubt she’d understand the concept of being friends with a former fiancé, or with a man in general. And you have no cause at all to be jealous of her, not for any reason. My relationship with her was so completely different than what you and I have it doesn’t even warrant a comparison.”
Tessa had covered his hand with her own, nibbling on her bottom lip the way she did when something was troubling her. “But you did have a - a physical relationship with her, didn’t you? A sexual one?”
Ian had sighed, falling back onto the pillows beside her. “A very bland, very infrequent, and very unsatisfying one, yes. At times it felt more like I was fulfilling an obligation, going through the motions because it was expected, or because the occasion called for it. I certainly never spent entire afternoons and evenings in bed with her, the way you and I have. The way we’ve been doing – good Lord, is it really that late? I never craved Davina so badly that I felt like I’d go out of mind if I didn’t have her right then and there. And I never, ever loved her or cherished her or wanted her the way I do you, Tessa. You are my one and only, darling. The only one I’ve ever obsessed over, and the only one I’ll ever love this way.”
She’d flung herself into his arms then, twining her limbs about his the way she liked to do. “Good,” she’d murmured huskily. “Because if I knew another woman had experienced the same sort of things with you that I have, I’d be tempted to wring her neck. Or pull her hair out by the roots. Or - or push her into a swamp filled with hungry alligators or something.”
He had chuckled, his own legs and arms intertwined with hers until they were so tightly joined it was like they shared one body. “Well, then. I suppose it’s a very good thing that you are my one and only, isn’t it? This way I won’t ever have to worry about bailing you out of jail for inflicting grievous bodily harm on some helpless female.”
“Oh, there he is. The table on the left towards the back.”
Tessa gave a little wave in the direction of the table she’d indicated, then grasped Ian’s hand in hers and tugged him along in her wake. As they approached the table, Peter stood to greet them, and Ian was more than a little surprised at the obvious physical changes in the boy.
But, no. He couldn’t really think of him that way any longer, could he? It seemed that being out on his own and seeing something of the world agreed with Peter, had helped to mature him into a man. He had filled out, no longer the skinny boy he’d been during his marriage to Tessa, and was wearing a neatly pressed pair of khaki slacks and a button down chambray shirt. He’d cut his hair into a short, close-cropped style, and appeared to be growing out a beard. Living in the Middle East had also put some much needed color in his formerly pale cheeks, and overall he looked more confident, happier, and more at peace with himself.
Ian stood back a bit as Tessa and Peter embraced, but to his observant gaze the hug seemed casual, friendly, and not the least bit romantic in nature. Tessa was quick to grab his hand and urge him forward, and the way she beamed at him made him feel like a silly fool for ever having been jealous of her ex.
“Ian, you remember Peter.”
Ian nodded, extending his free hand across the table. “Yes, of course. A pleasure to see you again, Peter. I hope you’ve been enjoying your visit these last few days.”
Peter shook his hand. “It’s been a nice change from the Middle East,” he acknowledged. “Though I swear I’ve been half-frozen since I got off the plane. I’m glad the conference wasn’t in Chicago or Denver, where it’s been snowing nonstop for weeks!”
Ian had feared that the conversation over dinner would be stilted and more than a little awkward, but he was relieved to find that it was anything but. Peter was a gifted storyteller, and regaled Ian and Tessa with tales of his various travels through Egypt, Syria, Iran, and other areas in the Middle East where the political and social tensions often ran high. He obviously loved his work, despite the risks that living in that part of the world often entailed, and Ian realized that ending his marriage to Tessa had in fact set Peter free to pursue his dreams. The fact that their divorce had also greatly benefitted Ian was something he tactfully declined to mention this evening.
Ian had given a firm shake of his head. “And I’ve told you, love, that it had to happen this way between us. You had to come to me of your own free will, because it was what you wanted. You were so shy and innocent back then it would have taken very little to try and seduce you. But that’s not the way I wanted you, Tessa. So everything unfolded exactly the way it was meant to. However, when I learned that you were having lunch with your ex-husband today, it brought all of those old feelings of mine back - the desperation, the hopelessness. In my mind, Peter was always the one thing standing in the way of you and I being together. Having him back in town, even temporarily, is a reminder of those two very long years I longed for you in silence.”
“But I’m yours now,” she’d reminded him, flashing her engagement ring. “Even without this ring or any sort of vows or promises, I’d be yours. Peter will never, ever be any sort of threat, will never come between us. And he’s only here for three more days, Ian, before he heads back to Bahrain. It would make me very, very happy if you’d agree to join us for dinner. Please?”
He’d set his wine glass down before pulling her close and tumbling her back onto the pillows. Teasingly, he had run a finger down the bridge of her nose before giving it a playful little pinch.
“You know I can never say no to you,” he’d admitted. “And especially when you ask so sweetly. So, yes, I’ll go along. Provided that Peter is okay with it.”
Tessa had nodded happily. “I’ll check with him, but I can’t imagine why he wouldn’t agree. Thank you, Ian. This means a lot to me.”
He’d dropped a kiss on her forehead. “Anything to make you happy, love.”
She had smiled up at him, her hands running caressingly up and down his arms and shoulders. “You make me happy. Just by being close. And especially being this close.” A more sober expression had crossed her lovely face then. “You know, I doubt I would have been even half as understanding or accepting as you’ve been about Peter if the situation was reversed. You’ve explained about your relationship with Davina to me, but when I met her in London last month it was pretty obvious that she still cares for you. I would have been a raving jealous witch if you’d had lunch with her.”
He had cupped her cheek in his hand tenderly. “That wouldn’t have happened,” he’d assured her. “Unlike you and Peter, Davina and I most certainly did not part as friends. I doubt she’d understand the concept of being friends with a former fiancé, or with a man in general. And you have no cause at all to be jealous of her, not for any reason. My relationship with her was so completely different than what you and I have it doesn’t even warrant a comparison.”
Tessa had covered his hand with her own, nibbling on her bottom lip the way she did when something was troubling her. “But you did have a - a physical relationship with her, didn’t you? A sexual one?”
Ian had sighed, falling back onto the pillows beside her. “A very bland, very infrequent, and very unsatisfying one, yes. At times it felt more like I was fulfilling an obligation, going through the motions because it was expected, or because the occasion called for it. I certainly never spent entire afternoons and evenings in bed with her, the way you and I have. The way we’ve been doing – good Lord, is it really that late? I never craved Davina so badly that I felt like I’d go out of mind if I didn’t have her right then and there. And I never, ever loved her or cherished her or wanted her the way I do you, Tessa. You are my one and only, darling. The only one I’ve ever obsessed over, and the only one I’ll ever love this way.”
She’d flung herself into his arms then, twining her limbs about his the way she liked to do. “Good,” she’d murmured huskily. “Because if I knew another woman had experienced the same sort of things with you that I have, I’d be tempted to wring her neck. Or pull her hair out by the roots. Or - or push her into a swamp filled with hungry alligators or something.”
He had chuckled, his own legs and arms intertwined with hers until they were so tightly joined it was like they shared one body. “Well, then. I suppose it’s a very good thing that you are my one and only, isn’t it? This way I won’t ever have to worry about bailing you out of jail for inflicting grievous bodily harm on some helpless female.”
“Oh, there he is. The table on the left towards the back.”
Tessa gave a little wave in the direction of the table she’d indicated, then grasped Ian’s hand in hers and tugged him along in her wake. As they approached the table, Peter stood to greet them, and Ian was more than a little surprised at the obvious physical changes in the boy.
But, no. He couldn’t really think of him that way any longer, could he? It seemed that being out on his own and seeing something of the world agreed with Peter, had helped to mature him into a man. He had filled out, no longer the skinny boy he’d been during his marriage to Tessa, and was wearing a neatly pressed pair of khaki slacks and a button down chambray shirt. He’d cut his hair into a short, close-cropped style, and appeared to be growing out a beard. Living in the Middle East had also put some much needed color in his formerly pale cheeks, and overall he looked more confident, happier, and more at peace with himself.
Ian stood back a bit as Tessa and Peter embraced, but to his observant gaze the hug seemed casual, friendly, and not the least bit romantic in nature. Tessa was quick to grab his hand and urge him forward, and the way she beamed at him made him feel like a silly fool for ever having been jealous of her ex.
“Ian, you remember Peter.”
Ian nodded, extending his free hand across the table. “Yes, of course. A pleasure to see you again, Peter. I hope you’ve been enjoying your visit these last few days.”
Peter shook his hand. “It’s been a nice change from the Middle East,” he acknowledged. “Though I swear I’ve been half-frozen since I got off the plane. I’m glad the conference wasn’t in Chicago or Denver, where it’s been snowing nonstop for weeks!”
Ian had feared that the conversation over dinner would be stilted and more than a little awkward, but he was relieved to find that it was anything but. Peter was a gifted storyteller, and regaled Ian and Tessa with tales of his various travels through Egypt, Syria, Iran, and other areas in the Middle East where the political and social tensions often ran high. He obviously loved his work, despite the risks that living in that part of the world often entailed, and Ian realized that ending his marriage to Tessa had in fact set Peter free to pursue his dreams. The fact that their divorce had also greatly benefitted Ian was something he tactfully declined to mention this evening.
