Clipped by Love
Page 18
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When he glances back at me, he just looks at me with a hooded gaze, and like it’s the easiest thing in the world, he steals my breath away.
And I hate it.
But I can’t control it. His eyes are so intoxicating, so beautiful, and the look on his face, the confident, sexy one has me hot all over. It’s insane and I honestly don’t understand my response to this caveman. Why does he affect me so?
With a grin on his lips, he says, “No, sweetheart, be ready to spill your guts.”
When the door shuts, I glare even more. I don’t like him. Not one fucking bit, and it’s gonna be a cold day in hell before I spill my guts to him.
“I kind of hope you lose,” Delanie says, and I cut a look toward her.
“Why would you say that?”
“Because it would be good for you to spill your guts and then fuck your feelings out. Maybe then you can remove the stick from your ass.”
“He’s good for you,” Mandie sings, very off-key, I might add.
“How is he good for me? I don’t even know him and screw you!” I yell at Delanie, but she ignores me, laughing.
“But you like him, which means something,” Mandie says, meeting my gaze.
Letting out an annoyed breath, I say, “Even if that was the damn case, I’m never gonna see him after this.”
“Exactly, so could you really walk away and not regret ripping his clothes off and riding him until you can’t walk?”
“Oh my God, Mandie!” I exclaim.
“No, really, I promise I’ll carry you to the car so you don’t have to walk as long as you let him fuck you into oblivion,” Delanie says then and I groan, dropping my head to the counter. There is something seriously wrong with the people I choose to be friends with.
“You two are killing me,” I moan, but somewhere deep inside me, I’m asking myself the same question.
The scary thing is I don’t think I can answer it with a no.
After setting the table, I try my best to sit nowhere near Jayden, but he sits across from me, a stupid, sexy grin on his beautiful face. I can feel him looking at me, drinking me in, and because of that, I look everywhere but at him as I eat. Delanie and everyone else is talking about various stuff, but I stay silent. I am having an ongoing battle with myself.
Do I have sex with Jayden or not?
The question is killing me because a part of me wants to, but the other part of me doesn’t think it’s a good idea. I don’t think I’m one of those girls who can have one-night stands. I’ve always dated guys and then had sex. The one time I did sleep with someone without dating them was because I wanted to lose my virginity and I knew he was safe. Even then, our friendship ended because he fell for me.
Dumbass.
When they start to talk about Jude’s girlfriend, who is a burlesque choreographer in Vegas, I finally look up to listen, letting go of my internal struggle. It’s obvious Jude is completely smitten with her. The love is radiating off him, and it’s sweet listening to him speak of her. Sometimes, I feel like I’m a hopeless romantic, but the psycho, driven hockey player in me keeps her locked up. I don’t have time to let my heart lead the way. The one time I did, shit went south and I was a blubbering mess. It almost ruined everything. Who I thought I was. My game. My heart. Everything was almost ruined. Thankfully, I’m a strong girl, and I can’t allow that to happen again until I’m ready for it. Still though, I can’t help but be entranced listening to Jude. I hope one day that the guy I fall for loves me as much as Jude loves Claire.
“She’s perfectly imperfect,” he says with a grin.
And I smile back. That’s me. I’m so perfectly imperfect that it’s crazy. Too bad no one will ever understand that.
“I love her for every bad and good thing about her, and I can’t wait to marry her,” he says, and Delanie and Mandie swoon. I have to admit, I do too.
“Oh my God, you guys are so sickening,” Jace says with a laugh. “The funny thing is, he used to be a player to the extreme.”
Jude smiles. “Yeah, but it takes one person to change everything.”
Isn’t that the damn truth, I think. For good or bad, all it takes is one person. To either ruin you or lift you. Unfortunately, I had the bad, but even so, I still crave the good. But first, I gotta get in the NHL.
“It’s awesome that you got picked up by the Kings so you can be close to her,” Mandie says. “I’ll probably follow Jason wherever he goes.”
Jude nods. “Yeah, but no matter what, we were gonna be together.”
“That’s sweet,” I say, surprisingly, not only to me but everyone at the table. Looking up, I see that everyone is looking at me, and I shrug. “What?”
“I’m not sure if you are being sarcastic,” Jude says with a grin. “You’re hard to read.”
“Yeah, she is,” Delanie says, but I smile.
“I’m not. I really do think it’s sweet,” I say, and before I can look down, Jayden steals my gaze. That grin he wears is lethal, and I have to look away just to find my breath. Ugh, how does he do this to me?
“Thanks,” Jude says then, but I don’t look at him as I cut up my steak and drench it in mustard. “So I have to ask, Baylor, where did you learn to play the way you do?”
I look up, ignoring Jayden to look at his brother. “My dad taught me. He played for the Bruins, won the Cup, and then when I was born, he quit.”
“Why?” Jace asks incredulously.
“Because he loved me more than the game.”
“Wow,” he says with his face scrunched up. “I’m not quitting for anyone.”
“You say that now,” Jude says with a shake of his head.
“No, I mean that. Hockey is everything.”
“Agreed,” I say with a shrug.
When Jayden scoffs, I look over at him and I say, “What?”
“You don’t mean that.”
Everyone goes silent as my eyes cut to slits. “How do you know?”
“Because there is no way that you can feel that when your dad made the ultimate sacrifice,” he says so matter-of-factly.
“Sure I can, because I want to repay him by being the best I can,” I say back, but he shakes his head.
“How is thinking hockey is everything, and not quitting if needed for love, going to repay him?”
And I hate it.
But I can’t control it. His eyes are so intoxicating, so beautiful, and the look on his face, the confident, sexy one has me hot all over. It’s insane and I honestly don’t understand my response to this caveman. Why does he affect me so?
With a grin on his lips, he says, “No, sweetheart, be ready to spill your guts.”
When the door shuts, I glare even more. I don’t like him. Not one fucking bit, and it’s gonna be a cold day in hell before I spill my guts to him.
“I kind of hope you lose,” Delanie says, and I cut a look toward her.
“Why would you say that?”
“Because it would be good for you to spill your guts and then fuck your feelings out. Maybe then you can remove the stick from your ass.”
“He’s good for you,” Mandie sings, very off-key, I might add.
“How is he good for me? I don’t even know him and screw you!” I yell at Delanie, but she ignores me, laughing.
“But you like him, which means something,” Mandie says, meeting my gaze.
Letting out an annoyed breath, I say, “Even if that was the damn case, I’m never gonna see him after this.”
“Exactly, so could you really walk away and not regret ripping his clothes off and riding him until you can’t walk?”
“Oh my God, Mandie!” I exclaim.
“No, really, I promise I’ll carry you to the car so you don’t have to walk as long as you let him fuck you into oblivion,” Delanie says then and I groan, dropping my head to the counter. There is something seriously wrong with the people I choose to be friends with.
“You two are killing me,” I moan, but somewhere deep inside me, I’m asking myself the same question.
The scary thing is I don’t think I can answer it with a no.
After setting the table, I try my best to sit nowhere near Jayden, but he sits across from me, a stupid, sexy grin on his beautiful face. I can feel him looking at me, drinking me in, and because of that, I look everywhere but at him as I eat. Delanie and everyone else is talking about various stuff, but I stay silent. I am having an ongoing battle with myself.
Do I have sex with Jayden or not?
The question is killing me because a part of me wants to, but the other part of me doesn’t think it’s a good idea. I don’t think I’m one of those girls who can have one-night stands. I’ve always dated guys and then had sex. The one time I did sleep with someone without dating them was because I wanted to lose my virginity and I knew he was safe. Even then, our friendship ended because he fell for me.
Dumbass.
When they start to talk about Jude’s girlfriend, who is a burlesque choreographer in Vegas, I finally look up to listen, letting go of my internal struggle. It’s obvious Jude is completely smitten with her. The love is radiating off him, and it’s sweet listening to him speak of her. Sometimes, I feel like I’m a hopeless romantic, but the psycho, driven hockey player in me keeps her locked up. I don’t have time to let my heart lead the way. The one time I did, shit went south and I was a blubbering mess. It almost ruined everything. Who I thought I was. My game. My heart. Everything was almost ruined. Thankfully, I’m a strong girl, and I can’t allow that to happen again until I’m ready for it. Still though, I can’t help but be entranced listening to Jude. I hope one day that the guy I fall for loves me as much as Jude loves Claire.
“She’s perfectly imperfect,” he says with a grin.
And I smile back. That’s me. I’m so perfectly imperfect that it’s crazy. Too bad no one will ever understand that.
“I love her for every bad and good thing about her, and I can’t wait to marry her,” he says, and Delanie and Mandie swoon. I have to admit, I do too.
“Oh my God, you guys are so sickening,” Jace says with a laugh. “The funny thing is, he used to be a player to the extreme.”
Jude smiles. “Yeah, but it takes one person to change everything.”
Isn’t that the damn truth, I think. For good or bad, all it takes is one person. To either ruin you or lift you. Unfortunately, I had the bad, but even so, I still crave the good. But first, I gotta get in the NHL.
“It’s awesome that you got picked up by the Kings so you can be close to her,” Mandie says. “I’ll probably follow Jason wherever he goes.”
Jude nods. “Yeah, but no matter what, we were gonna be together.”
“That’s sweet,” I say, surprisingly, not only to me but everyone at the table. Looking up, I see that everyone is looking at me, and I shrug. “What?”
“I’m not sure if you are being sarcastic,” Jude says with a grin. “You’re hard to read.”
“Yeah, she is,” Delanie says, but I smile.
“I’m not. I really do think it’s sweet,” I say, and before I can look down, Jayden steals my gaze. That grin he wears is lethal, and I have to look away just to find my breath. Ugh, how does he do this to me?
“Thanks,” Jude says then, but I don’t look at him as I cut up my steak and drench it in mustard. “So I have to ask, Baylor, where did you learn to play the way you do?”
I look up, ignoring Jayden to look at his brother. “My dad taught me. He played for the Bruins, won the Cup, and then when I was born, he quit.”
“Why?” Jace asks incredulously.
“Because he loved me more than the game.”
“Wow,” he says with his face scrunched up. “I’m not quitting for anyone.”
“You say that now,” Jude says with a shake of his head.
“No, I mean that. Hockey is everything.”
“Agreed,” I say with a shrug.
When Jayden scoffs, I look over at him and I say, “What?”
“You don’t mean that.”
Everyone goes silent as my eyes cut to slits. “How do you know?”
“Because there is no way that you can feel that when your dad made the ultimate sacrifice,” he says so matter-of-factly.
“Sure I can, because I want to repay him by being the best I can,” I say back, but he shakes his head.
“How is thinking hockey is everything, and not quitting if needed for love, going to repay him?”