Crouching Vampire, Hidden Fang
CHAPTER 9

"Boy, am I glad you're... here...." The sentence trailed off as I saw who it was knocking at my door. "Oh, hello. When I called the dial-a-reaper number, I hadn't expected you two would be the ones to make the pickup."
"The director thought it would be best if we limited exposure of Brotherhood members to one who so clearly does not embrace the true glory of the light," Janice Mycowski said primly as she pushed past me into the hotel room. "You have Kristjana and Mattias here?"
"Yes." I closed the door behind Rick, trying to summon up a welcoming smile.
"You look well," Rick said politely. "Iceland must agree with you."
"Thank you. No!"
Rick looked startled for a moment until he realized I wasn't shouting at him.
Mattias, who had been forbidden to leave his chair, grabbed the seat and chair-hopped his way toward me. "Pia!" he called as I reentered the living room of our hotel suite.
"I told you to stay!" I said, pointing back at the corner where he'd been.
His face shifted into a pout. "But Kristoff is not here. You said I had to stay out of his way, but he is gone. Smooches!"
Rick and Janice looked at Mattias with obvious surprise, the former turning a bemused glance upon me.
"Er... he's a bit... affectionate," I said, blushing a little as I hissed to Mattias, "I told you there will be no kissing!"
"Piiiia," he said, drawing out my name in a depressed sigh.
"You've light-bound him!" Janice declared after giving him a good long look. She turned her fierce gaze upon me. "You dare!"
"You bet your butt I dare," I said, squaring my shoulders and looking like I would be prone to light-binding anyone who annoyed me.
She took a step back.
"It's keeping him happy and me sane, so I don't want to hear one word about that. Kristjana is through the bedroom to your left." I gestured toward the appropriate door.
She marched to it with a glare that probably could have cracked cement. "I shall be sure to tell the director just how you treated our members!"
"Oh, I'm sure Frederic has a much worse image of me than as someone who dazzles a couple of troublesome reapers," I said, following her into the room. I was braced for a scream of outrage, which was forthcoming immediately.
"What have you done to her?" Janice yelled. I stood in the doorway and smiled somewhat weakly as Janice fussed around the prone woman lying on the bed. "Goddess above! You've killed her!"
"No, no, she's not dead. She's just sedated. She was a wee bit upset when we got her out of the room she was being kept in, and the doctor thought it would be best if she had a little downtime to recover. I'm not quite sure why, but she was resistant to the light-binding, so we gave up trying to make her happy and just let her go to sleep instead."
"Downtime!" Janice shot me a look of purest venom before she began patting Kristjana's cheeks in an attempt, I assumed, to bring her around. "You have become one of the monsters you should be destroying."
"She appears to be injured," Rick said, peering over his wife's shoulder.
"Not really," I said quickly. "Not seriously, anyway. There was a little incident on the fire escape when she tried to break free, and Kristoff was slow in grabbing her, so she went over the edge, but we were at the bottom of the fire escape, so she didn't fall very far. The doctor said it looks far worse than it really is. The black eye should fade in no time."
Both of them gave me identical looks of horror.
"We had her X-rayed and everything," I reassured them. "I managed to get her light-bound for the duration of the hospital visit, and she checked out fine, so really, there's nothing to worry about."
"Do you need me? I'm here if you need licking anywhere," Mattias called from the doorway, blowing me a kiss as he beamed at Rick and Janice.
"His things are all packed and ready," I told Rick with an urgency that I feared was unmistakable. "I'm afraid we didn't have time to get Kristjana's things, but with the town crawling with vampires, we thought it best to sit tight and not worry about her clothes and such."
"Kristoff!" Mattias called happily from where he still sat in the doorway, his head turned to the door of the suite. "Pia said I must sit in the chair until you returned. Now I can go to her. She needs me."
Kristoff! I told you the Brotherhood people would be here to pick up Mattias and Kristjana! Go away before they see you!
Dio , he swore. I thought they would be gone by now. Did you find out where Alec is?
No, I haven't even brought that up.
"Kristoff?" Janice said, suspicion tainting the word.
"Yes, he's my... er..."
"Husband," Kristoff said, appearing in the doorway. He eyed the two Brotherhood folk for a moment. I do not know them. Where are they from?
Seattle.
Then they will not know me, either. I have not worked in the United States. "Kristoff von Hannelore," he added, making a little bow.
Von Hannelore? I asked, somewhat surprised by his surname. I had been too flustered at our rushed wedding to notice what name was listed for him on the papers, and hadn't thought to ask him about it since. Isn't that German? I thought you were Italian.
My parents were from a small principality in what is now Germany. I lived there in my youth.
"But... you're married to the sacristan," Janice said, frowning.
Mattias took my hand and kissed my fingers. "Yes, she is. My Pia. My wife. She needs me. Licks?"
Kristoff pried Mattias's fingers off my hand, taking it himself. "She was married to me first."
"It's a bit complicated," I said, wondering how on earth I could explain Kristoff.
"Kristoff is my friend, too," Mattias added, beaming at him and trying to take his hand.
Kristoff growled, I am not used to having to be explained.
Yeah, well, people who charge in on meetings with their mortal enemies just have to tough out what they find.
"You have two husbands?" Rick asked a bit hesitantly. "Is that legal?"
"Well... technically-"
"Yes," Kristoff said quickly.
They don't seem to realize you're a vampire. I'm glad, but I have to say that it surprises me a bit.
It's not like we walk around with a big sign pointing to us proclaiming, "Dark One," you know.
Yes, but you're their area of specialty. Shouldn't they at least sense something different about you?
Experienced reapers might. These two appear innocuous.
"I like licking," Mattias said, apropos of nothing.
"You try and you'll find yourself without a tongue," Kristoff threatened as Mattias grinned at him.
"Mattias! Sit!" I ordered, pointing to the chair. "No licking! No kissing! And stop trying to hold Kristoff's hand."
"Pia, Pia, Pia," was his sad little refrain as he obeyed my command and sat in a chair next to me, pouting slightly as he clutched the hem of my gauze skirt.
"What you have done to that poor man-to both of them..." Janice said, her face dark with malevolence. "You will answer to the governors for these crimes; oh, yes, you will!"
Rick had been giving Kristoff a thorough visual examination, and said finally, a puzzled frown between his brows, "You are not a member of the Brotherhood?"
"No," he said, tensing.
"Kristoff is helping me with... er... finding Ulfur," I improvised, hoping the mostly true statement would pass muster. "Which isn't going to be easy at all. An Ilargi has taken his soul."
"Ilargi!" Janice gasped. "Here? You must stop him!"
"Easier said than done. Kristoff is here to help me find Ulfur's remains, his essence, so we can raise him as a lich and get him away from the Ilargi."
"You are a vespillo," Rick said to Kristoff, nodding at my deception. "You have a necromancer already?"
I am not a vespillo!
No, but it won't hurt if they think you are. I'd rather not have them poking around and figuring out you're a vampire.
Bah!
"Yes, her name is Eve." I glanced at my watch. "In fact, we have an appointment to meet with her and her... er... assistant in half an hour, so we really should get down to business."
"What business would that be?" Rick asked politely as Janice gently shook Kristjana.
"She's asleep," Mattias said helpfully. "She was not nice to Pia, so we put her to sleep. She threatened to rip my lips off, too."
"You have fulfilled only part of your bargain," Janice said, giving up on Kristjana. "You must also retrieve the spirit left behind and escort him to Ostri. Which"-a slow, evil smile crept over her face-"considering he is now a phantasm, is going to be very difficult."
"But not impossible once he's a lich," I said, hoping that was true.
Evidently it was, because her face darkened again, and she turned away with a muttered word.
"I'm afraid we cannot help with your spirit, if that's what you are asking," Rick said. "It would violate the terms of the agreement, you see. I wish we could help, but our hands are tied."
"My hands were tied earlier," Mattias piped up. He sent me a loving look. "Pia tied my hands to my feet and made me lie on the floor while she took a bath. I pretended I was her bath mat."
"We weren't going to tell people about that," I reminded Mattias with a weak smile at the others. "It wasn't like it sounds...." Kristoff's look had me stammering to a halt. "But enough about that. The business I referred to actually concerns the board of governors. You see, there's a vampire I want to find, and I think they can help me."
Janice bristled. "You dare to use us in that way?"
"You know, you keep asking me if I dare to do things, and I think by now we can take it as read that yes, I dare. I dare a lot, actually. Why? Because I have to. So if we could move past the dramatic gasps of horror and bugging-out eyes and pointing fingers and whatnot, and stick to the facts, I'd be really grateful."
"I love you," Mattias told me, and proceeded to suck on the bit of my skirt hem that he held.
Janice's face turned beet red. "You dare-" She caught herself in time. "You can't seriously believe that the governors would in any way aid someone who so clearly does not follow the precepts of the Brotherhood. You think we would turn over to you our database of vampire locations?"
"No, but that's interesting that you have one." Did you know that they have a database?
Yes. It is sorely out-of-date.
Good.
"That's good, because I can assure you that the governors will do nothing-nothing-to aid one of the evil undead. Unless, of course, you're referring to cleansing them of their darkness and bringing them into the light, as they all should be."
Kristoff stiffened beside me.
Relax. That's how they all talk.
That is not a thought prone to inducing relaxation, he answered with a mental grimace.
I fought the urge to touch him, knowing full well that I couldn't do so without wanting to jump him.
Kristoff's lips curled slightly.
You could at least pretend you don't hear my smutty thoughts about you.
Why not? I enjoy them. I particularly liked the one you had about massage oil, although I prefer cherry flavor to orange.
"What exactly did you want to know?" Rick asked.
"I have reason to believe that one of the vampires has been held by the Brotherhood," I said, picking my words carefully. I didn't want to outright accuse them of nabbing Alec if he had gone along willingly. Then again, I didn't know if he had done that. "I'd like to know where he is, and if he's OK."
"No," Janice said abruptly.
"You don't seem to understand," Kristoff said, wrapping his arm around my waist. "Pia is not asking. She is telling you what it will take in order for her to turn over these two reapers."
Mattias rubbed his head on my hip.
"You will turn them over because that is part of the agreement," Janice said slowly.
"I'm changing that," I said simply. "Now in order to get them, I want to know where Alec is."
"Alec?" She frowned and glanced at her husband.
He shook his head, shrugging.
"Alec Darwin. He's a vampire who was in Iceland two months ago. He disappeared not long after I went home."
"Why do you care?" Janice asked.
I thought for a few seconds of lying, but I'd done enough indulging in half-truths for the day. "I had a relationship with him at one time, and although it's over, I am concerned for his well-being."
"Relationship?" Janice asked, horrified. "You gave yourself to a vampire?"
"Pia was not a Zorya at the time," Kristoff said, taking us all a bit by surprise.
"That's right," I agreed. "And we weren't together for very long, but I still would like to know what's happened to him."
"I'm sure he's dead by now," Janice said with malicious enjoyment. She bared her teeth. "If he is in the power of the governors, then he has been cleansed."
"So they'd take him to the Brotherhood headquarters?" I asked.
Janice looked sullenly at her husband when he answered, "Most likely. That's where the big storage facility is, you see. Where they keep the vampires before they are cleansed."
I felt a bit sick to my stomach at the thought of such a thing.
Beside me, pain spiked through Kristoff. I leaned into him, offering him wordless comfort.
"Do not tell her any more," Janice ground out through her teeth. "You have said enough."
"Alec may well be dead," I said calmly as he tensed up again. "But I'd like to hear that from Frederic himself."
"Monsieur Robert does not wish to speak to you," Janice said, whipping out her cell phone before she remembered that it wouldn't work in Europe. She jammed it back into her bag. "But if you demand proof of that yourself, I will call the Brotherhood headquarters. I will use this phone." She gestured to the phone next to Kristjana.
"Be my guest. Mattias, come along. Rick, can I offer you some coffee while we wait for Janice?"
Beloved, these are reapers, Kristoff protested as he followed Mattias and me out of the room and into the living area. You do not offer them beverages.
You may not, but I do. I like Rick. He's not at all snarky like his wife. Besides, he said he was a historian, and I'd like to know more about the Brotherhood.
Why? he asked quickly.
Just curious about how they got started going after you guys. "So, Rick, you're a historian, right? You must know a lot about the origins of the Brotherhood. How do you like your coffee?"
"Black is fine," he said, sitting down on the couch next to where I parked Mattias, giving me a bit of a bemused look. Kristoff sat gingerly on the chair next to him, eyeing long fingers of sunlight as they spilled onto the highly polished oak floor. "And I know something about it, but unfortunately not a lot. The archives dealing with the history of the Brotherhood really only included resources that cover the time after the Lodi Congress."
The what?
It is the name given to the body that organized the first hunt of Dark Ones.
"Huh. I know they used to just deal with helping dead folk, but then something happened to switch their attention to vampires. What exactly was that?" I asked, giving Mattias a cup before taking one for myself and plopping down on the arm of Kristoff's chair.
Kristoff shifted uncomfortably. The finger of sunlight was creeping ever closer to our feet.
"It's a little hard to piece together precisely, but I gather that there was a Bavarian Zorya who killed a vampire's mate in a jealous fit. The vampire, in revenge, slaughtered both the Zorya and her husband, the sacristan for that area. The Brotherhood was so outraged at their deaths, it started a movement to cleanse the darkness that threatened to consume not just Brotherhood members, but all who stood in the way of the vampires."
"A vampire started it?" I asked, finding it hard to believe.
Kristoff swore in Italian, fortunately only in my head. I had to admit I agreed with his sentiment. What do you bet there's more to the story than that? I asked him.
There is.
I peeked at him out of the corner of my eye. That sounded like more than just a general condemnation of the reapers. Do you know how the Brotherhood got started on their vendetta against you guys?
All who hunt the reapers are familiar with their history.
Good, then you can tell me what happened. "Are you absolutely sure that a vampire started it?" I asked.
"Without a doubt, yes. I've seen the primary sources."
"I'm surprised primary sources survived so long." Kristoff?
Why do you care how the war started? It's ending it that I care about.
Rick said as he set down his coffee, "There is only one that I've seen. Or, rather, seen photocopies of. It is a diary that mentions the origin of the Lodi Congress."
I was a bit surprised at Kristoff's snappish tone but kept my smile serene. "Fascinating stuff. I wonder-"
"I have spoken to the director," Janice announced with a dramatic wave of her hand as she entered the room. Judging by the gloating smile on her face, she was enjoying every moment of this. "The director, as I told you, has no desire to speak with you personally, and asked me to inform you that your agreement to the original terms is binding, and is not open to amendment. Further, he was appalled and shocked to hear how you've been abusing the priestess and sacristan, and asked me to tell you that separate charges may be made on those accounts."
No surprise there, I said. But we got what we wanted.
They didn't confirm that they have Alec, Beloved.
They didn't deny it, either, and thanks to Rick, we now know where he would be likely to be held.
"We will take them now," Janice said, gesturing to her husband. "I just pray to the goddess that they will survive your abuses without permanent damage."
"Mattias, how would you like to go to Los Angeles?" I asked as she and Rick went into Kristjana's room.
He thought for a moment. "Would I?"
"Yes, you would. You'd have fun there, and meet new people, and see new things."
"New things are good. Are you going?"
I leaned forward to whisper in his ear, "Not right now. Don't tell anyone, but I will be there soon, and I'll see you then."
"Piaaaa," he said, his eyes filled with adoration. He turned his head to kiss me, but I jumped back. He smacked his lips a couple of times at me. "Good-bye kiss?"
"No," Kristoff said, slamming Mattias's bag into his arms, sending him staggering back a couple of steps. "Don't let the door hit you on the-"
"Kristoff!" I glared at him. You don't have to be rude to him! He can't help being like a gigantic human puppy when he's under the influence of my womanly wiles.
He might not be able to help it, but I'm tired of him always trying to fondle you.
Jealousy ill becomes you when it concerns someone light-bound. "The doctor says she should be out for another hour or so," I told Rick as he emerged from the room with a limp Kristjana in his arms. "But she should be fine. Go with Janice and Rick, Mattias. They will take you to LA."
"I am going with Janice and Rick," he repeated, following them to the door. "I will be good."
"I'm sure you will," I said, standing at the door to the suite and waving at Mattias until the door of the elevator closed on them. I slumped against the wall, relieved to be rid of the stress of keeping Mattias under control. "Whew. That's done. I can feed you now. I know you're hungry, and we should have a few minutes before we have to go spirit hunting-"
"Pia!" I de-slumped when a familiar dark-haired woman emerged from the other elevator, tugging a tall, thin woman after her. "Hi! We're a bit early. You don't mind, do you?"