Dark Desire
Chapter Twelve

Raven stood in the comparative shelter of the porch, her face turned up toward the sky, eyes closed. Tiny beads of perspiration dotted her forehead, and her fingers twisted together compulsively over her stomach. She was not with the others, rather somewhere out of her body and concentrating on attempting to find Byron's location. Beside her stood her dark, intimidating husband, his mind obviously locked with hers. Mikhail was so like Jacques that Shea could not tear her gaze from him. As she moved onto the porch a step behind Jacques, she could clearly see that Mikhail was furious. He was seething with anger, violence swirling very close to the surface, yet his posture was purely protective. He had placed himself between Raven and the ferocity of the storm.
Gregori was as still as a statue, his face a blank mask, his silver eyes as empty as death, yet Shea gave him a wide berth. There was something dangerous in his utter stillness. Shea felt she had no way to sorting out the complexity of the Carpathian male's nature. Gregori was watching Raven through narrowed, restless eyes, eyes that saw far too much. Suddenly he cursed, low and vicious, startling from someone of his stature and power. "She should not put herself at risk. She is with child."
His eyes met Jacques', silver lightning and black ice. Total understanding between the two men. Shea merged her mind with Jacques' quickly to try to understand the hidden currents. Raven's pregnancy, if she was pregnant, changed everything as far as the men were concerned. Shea could see no evidence of a child - Raven appeared as slim as ever - but she couldn't believe the healer would be wrong. He seemed so infallible, so completely invincible. The child was everything, all-important to the men. It surprised, even shocked her, the way they regarded the pregnancy. It was a miracle to both of them. The baby was more important than any of their lives. Shea was confused. Despite Jacques' fractured memories, his protective streak was extremely strong.
"He's aware of his surroundings, but he can't move. Even his mind is locked and still. He is paralyzed somehow." Raven's voice startled Shea, brought her back to the stormy weather and their rescue mission. Raven was clearly speaking of Byron. "He can't move or call out, not even mentally. It is dark and damp, and he knows he will suffer greatly before they are done with him." Raven swayed, her hands protectively covering her stomach.
The healer moved, a blur of speed, catching her arm and wrenching her out into the driving rain. Gregori snagged Mikhail's shirt, too, and yanked him into the fury of the storm. "Break off now, Raven," Gregori commanded. He shook her, shook Mikhail. "Let go of him now!"
Jacques leapt forward, grabbed his brother, and hit his face, once, twice. "Come back!" It was a hoarse cry.
Shea bit her lip, suddenly terrified. The couple seemed somehow bound, caught in the vampire's trap with Byron. Gregori pulled Raven farther into the driving rain. Jacques pushed Mikhail after them. It was Mikhail who recovered first. He blinked at his brother, looked around him as if unaware where he was. Then, instinctively, he reached for Raven.
"Bring her back, Mikhail. Go after her. Guide her back. This is too dangerous for her. Even with my connection to her, she is trapped," Gregori said. "We are dealing with more than just any vampire. This one is skilled in the black arts and the use of herbs and power stones. I know what he has done and how he is doing it."
Mikhail pulled Raven tightly against him, his black eyes hard with mental strain. Raven blinked, looked around her, seemed surprised to find herself in the rain. Her hand went to her temple in a gesture of pain. "Stop staring at me. I feel like some kind of freak show." She sounded hurt, hid her face on Mikhail's chest.
His arms circled her, drew her into the shelter of his body, his head bent lovingly toward hers. It was such an intimate gesture, Shea had to turn away. To her dismay, she found the healer studying her. Shea moved closer to Jacques, unconsciously seeking protection from the scrutiny.
"You need nourishment." The healer spoke gently.
"When I'm hungry, I'll eat," Shea told him haughtily. "You don't need to worry about all of us. I know how to care for myself."
The silvery eyes slashed through the lie. "Your hunger radiates from you, and your weakness could place all of us in jeopardy." He turned his powerful stare on Raven.
Raven squirmed visibly. "Oh, shut up, Gregori," she snapped, her blue eyes flashing fire at him. A faint smile curved his mouth, failing to light his eyes. "I did not speak."
"You spoke volumes, and you know it." Her chin went up belligerently. "Your male sense of superiority is enough to make a woman want to scream. Honestly, Gregori, all that cold logic makes a person crazy." She allowed Mikhail to lead her onto the porch.
"Logic works, unlike emotional women," Gregori returned unruffled. "Your first duty is to protect your child. Our first duty must be to protect you." His silver gaze clearly censured Mikhail.
"You don't know for sure if I'm pregnant."
"Do not play games, Raven. Sometimes your rebellious ways grow tedious. I know you are with child. You cannot hide such a thing from me. Mikhail knows it to be true, and he knows he cannot allow your dangerous involvement in this mission to continue with you in such a condition."
Raven flung out her ebony hair. "No one allows me to do anything. I decide. I was born and raised human, Gregori," she pointed out. "I can only be myself. Byron is my friend, and he is in desperate trouble. I intend to help him."
"If your lifemate is so enthralled with you that he would allow you such foolishness," Gregori replied softly, menacingly, "then I can do no other than protect you myself."
"Don't you talk about Mikhail like that!" Raven was furious.
You really know how to stir up the hornets' nest with the women, do you not?
Mikhail demanded, even though he understood Gregori completely and felt him justified.
Gregori did not look at him but stared out into the storm.
The child she carries is my lifemate. It is female and belongs to me.
There was an unmistakable warning note, an actual threat.
In all their centuries together, such a thing had never happened. Mikhail immediately closed his mind to Raven. She could never hope to understand how Gregori felt. Without a lifemate, the healer had no choice but to eventually destroy himself or become the very epitome of evil. The vampire. The walking dead. Gregori had spent endless centuries waiting for his lifemate, holding on when those younger than he had given in. Gregori had defended their people, lived a solitary existence so that he might keep their race safe. He was far more alone than the others of his kind, and far more susceptible to the call of power as he had to hunt and kill often. Mikhail could not blame his oldest friend for his possessive, protective streak toward the unborn child. He spoke calmly and firmly, hoping to avoid a confrontation. Gregori had held on for so long, this promise of a lifemate could send him careening over the edge into the dark madness if he felt there was a danger to the female child.
Raven is not like Carpathian woman. You have always known and accepted that. She will not remain in seclusion during this time. She would wither and die.
Gregori actually snarled, a menacing rumble that froze Shea in place, put Jacques into a crouch, and had Mikhail shifting position for a better defense. Raven pushed past Mikhail's strong body and fearlessly laid a hand on the healer's arm. Everyone else might think Gregori could turn at any moment, but he had held on for centuries, and she believed implicitly that he would no more hurt her than he would her child.
"Gregori, don't be angry with Mikhail." Her voice was soft and gentle. "His first duty to me is to see to my happiness."
"It is to see to your protection." Gregori's voice was a blend of heat and light.
"In a way it's the same thing. Don't blame him for having to make adjustments for what you consider my shortcomings. It hasn't been easy for him, or for me, for that matter. We could have waited to conceive until I'd had time to become more familiar with Carpathian ways, but that would have taken more time than you have. You're far more than a close friend to us - you're family, a part of our hearts. We weren't willing to risk losing you. So we both pray this child is a female and that she grows to love and cherish you as we do, that this is the one who will be your other half."
Gregori stirred as if to say something.
Do not say anything!
Mikhailhissed in the healer's head.
Shebelieves the child will have a choice.
Gregori bowed his head mentally to Mikhail. If Mikhail chose to allow his wife the comforting if false thought that the female child would have a choice in such a matter, then so be it.
Shea was astonished that a man so powerful, obviously such a leader as Mikhail, could calmly allow another man to snarl at him and rebuke him as Gregori had. She was beginning to suspect that Jacques' brother was a man of strong character, and the love and emotion apparent in both him and Raven brought tears to her eyes. This was Jacques' family, his legacy, and there was real love, real affection, among them, making them capable of great sacrifice. She slipped her hand into Jacques' and clung to him, feeling she had something in common with Raven.
Raven's blue eyes were steady on Gregori. "If you wish to examine me to determine the sex of the child, you may do so." Her chin lifted. "But as you wish me to accept you for yourself, for your predatory nature, you must accept me as I am. My heart and soul may be Carpathian, but my mind is human. I will not be put on a shelf somewhere because you or my husband deems it necessary. Human women moved out of the dark ages a long time ago. My place is with Mikhail, and I must make my own decisions. If you feel the need to add your protection to Mikhail's, I will be most grateful."
There was a long silence, and the red glow faded slowly from the slashing silver eyes. Gregori shook his head slowly, with infinite weariness. This woman was so different from his kind. Reckless. Compassionate. Unaware of every taboo she broke. His hand went to her stomach, fingers splayed. He focused, aimed, sent himself out of his body. His breath caught in his throat, and his heart seemed to melt. Deliberately he moved to surround the tiny being, merging his light and will for a heartbeat of time. He was taking no chances. This was his lifemate; he would ensure it with every means at his disposal, from blood bonding to mental sharing. No one was as powerful as he. This female child was his and his alone. He could hang on until she came of age.
"We did it, didn't we?" Raven said softly, bringing Gregori back to his own body. "She's a girl."
Gregori stepped away from Raven, holding on to his composure with his great strength of will. "Few Carpathian women carry to full term. The child rarely survives the first year of life. Do not be so certain we are out of the woods. You must rest and be cared for. The child comes first. Byron would say so also. Mikhail must take you far from this place, away from the vampire and the assassins. I will hunt and rid our people of the danger while your mate looks after you." Gregori's voice was low and pitched in silver tones, tones of light that beckoned and danced. Nearly impossible to resist. So calm and soothing and reasonable.
Raven actually had to shake off the compulsion to do as he wished. She glared at him. "Don't even try that with me, Gregori." She included Mikhail in her stare. "And you, you big lunk, you would have gone along with him like the tree-swinging macho man you are. Watch these guys, Shea, they're impossible. They'll do anything to get their way."
Shea found herself smiling. "So I've noticed." It was reassuring to see that Raven had learned to hold her own with the men. Shea was every bit as strong.
"I can't leave Byron out there to suffer the same fate as Jacques," Raven insisted stubbornly. She looked beyond Gregori to Shea for support.
"We can't."
Shea had seen firsthand what the human butchers were capable of, and she could no more leave Byron to such a fate than she could walk away from Jacques. She nodded in agreement. "Once we have Byron's location, you men can go after him. I'll stay with Raven, and we'll wait for you here. The vampire can't come out with the sun up, and we have guns if the humans show up."
"In any case, Mikhail, you know you could protect us from humans, even from a distance," Raven reminded him.
"Shea is right, healer." Jacques suddenly threw his support to the women. He owed Byron. He could not allow anyone to suffer as he had. He glanced at Gregori. "You knew Raven and Mikhail were in trouble when their minds were connected to Byron's. What is it? How does the vampire trap us?"
"He ensnared Raven and me through Byron, a monumental feat," Mikhail admitted. Then he rubbed his jaw ruefully. "Is it possible, little brother, you enjoyed hitting me just a bit too much?"
Jacques' teeth gleamed white in the semblance of a smile. He could not help but admire Mikhail's coolness in the midst of a threat as lethal as the healer's and the vampire's combined. To be able to joke, to put aside the ego of the Carpathian male, was nothing short of a miracle. Fragments of memory rushed over him, memories of greatness, of a powerful being dedicated to the preservation of their people. His arms crept around Shea, his anchor to reality, his bridge from his lost past to the present. Shea responded at once, so in tune with him she needed no second hint. She leaned into him immediately, flooding his mind with warmth and soothing comfort.
"There is a root," Gregori explained. "One can grind it into a fine powder, mix it with two types of berries and sage. It is boiled until it becomes thick, all liquid evaporated, and the remaining gel is then mixed with the venom from a tree toad. I am positive the vampire is using it. The recipe is an ancient one and lost to all but those of us who studied alchemy and black magic. I know of only two others besides me who would have this knowledge."
"Aidan," Mikhail said softly. "Or Julian."
"It cannot be," Gregori denied. "I would feel their presence in our land. Even changed, I would know either of them."
"What exactly does this drug do?" Shea asked. The identity of the vampire seemed secondary; she was far more intrigued with the results of such a mixture as Gregori described. She had studied plants and herbs extensively. Common ones like foxglove and rhododendrons could produce paralysis. She knew, too, that toad venom of itself could be lethal. Certain tribes in various parts of the world had discovered its properties and used it to tip their darts, spears, and arrows. Somehow the blend of root and berries and toxin must paralyze the nervous system, even affect the mind. "How is it administered?"
"It has to be in the bloodstream," Gregori said.
"Who could get close enough to inject a Carpathian? Even a vampire cunning enough to disguise his true self would not have the strength to overcome someone of Jacques' stature. It is inconceivable." Mikhail said. "Jacques was a hunter, a dispenser of justice. At the time the murders were decimating our people, he would have been doubly cautious."
"The vampire tricked him. It is the usual weapon of a deceiver, is it not?" Gregori informed them calmly. "Dawn is here. We must hurry."
The rain beat down into the silence; the wind shook the trees. Jacques stared sightlessly into the forest. Fragments of memory teased and whispered at him. "Blood. So much blood." The words came out of their own accord. His fingertips stroked absently over his neck, a frown creasing his forehead. "It was a hunter's trap, a crude, nearly invisible wire. It cut my throat."
Nobody moved or spoke, not wanting to break Jacques' concentration. Shea found herself holding her breath. Memory was so important to Jacques, and right now it might save Byron's life. She could feel the pain splintering through his mind, felt him blocking it out, focusing his will to remember. He rubbed his thumb back and forth across an eyebrow, then frowned slightly. "I was weak. He came then, offered his blood. I did not want to offend him, but I was reluctant. He was... he disturbed me." Jacques broke off, gripping his temples hard with his fingertips. "I cannot see him." He looked at Shea with desperate, anguished eyes. "I do not know who he is."
She wrapped her arms around him both mentally and physically, hating the worn, tortured lines etched into his beautiful face.
Two days ago you could barely stand, could not remember anything. This is a miracle, Jacques. What you've accomplished is a miracle.
She tried to reassure him, reading accurately that he loathed the fact that he could not eke out another detail.
"It is enough to piece it together," Gregori said, his voice a soothing balm. He touched his fingertips to Jacques' temples, inhaled slowly, and focused, sending himself outside his body.
Shea could actually feel the pain melting away, leaving Jacques whole and calm. The healer's power was extraordinary.
She wanted it, felt it moving within her, rising to follow where the healer's light led.
Gregori's voice broke the spell. "You must have accepted his offer. The poison was in the betrayer's blood."
"What prevents the betrayer from being paralyzed?" Mikhail hissed it, a venomous sound that sent a shiver through Shea. There was something very lethal about all these men, something far different from their human counterparts. They accepted violence as easily as the animals in the surrounding forest did. They were predators. It was in the way they moved, in the way they held themselves, in their very thoughts.
Gregori made a slow circle of the porch. Shea found it interesting that all three men had positioned their bodies between the dawn and the women. "There are ways, but we have no time for such a discussion, for we must act now if we are to do this. Raven, while you were connected to Byron, could you get a sense of direction, anything at all?"
"He was not alone. He was somewhere underground, a cave maybe. It was damp, musty. He was not so very far from us." Raven looked up at Mikhail with sad eyes, afraid she had not come up with the information they needed to find the Carpathian in time. One day in the company of the two human butchers and Byron was surely going to die a hideous death. Mikhail laced his fingers through hers, brought her knuckles to the warmth of his mouth in understanding and unity.
"The cellar, Jacques," Shea suddenly said, excited. "They took him to the cellar. They can't know this land very well, and they would go where they had already been successful. I know what they're like, very arrogant, particularly the one called Don Wallace. It would be just like him to use the same place, thinking he was thumbing his nose at all of you."
"It would be damp and musty all right, but they would find Jacques' coffin gone. They would know the place had been disturbed recently," Mikhail argued thoughtfully.
"True, but wouldn't the vampire tell them Jacques is alive? He saw Jacques and me in the forest earlier with Byron," Shea said. "They would feel safe because you're all supposed to be under cover during the day, I'm telling you, this is exactly the kind of thing a man like Wallace would do. He believes you're all vampires and can't move in the daylight hours."
"This Wallace," Mikhail said softly, "he is the nephew of Eugene Slovensky, enemy to all Carpathians. We have met briefly before. I believe the young lady is correct. He believes he is smarter and more cunning than we."
"Aidan would have done our race a huge service had he killed him when he had the opportunity," Gregori observed. "We were hard-pressed that night, with Mikhail injured and Raven in the hands of madmen."
"Maybe this Aidan had already turned?" Shea speculated.
Gregori shook his head slowly. "He had not turned then, nor has he turned now. He is powerful, such as Mikhail and I. The world would know if one of our stature had become the most feared creature of all. No, it is not Aidan. In any case, he has a twin brother, one even more powerful, who would know instantly had Aidan turned." Gregori's voice was low and smooth, filled with certainty.
Shea shook her head to rid herself of the hypnotic effect. Gregori's power frightened her. His voice alone could do just about anything, produce any reaction in any of them. No one should have that kind of power.
"So why can we not detect the vampire when he is near?" Mikhail asked no one in particular. "I have scanned the area and can detect none of our kind, not even Byron."
"Shea was able to detect the vampire when I could not," Jacques said. "I was not certain I believed her at first, but I could feel as she did when we merged."
Shea lifted her chin in challenge. "Do you think you can explain how all this was done, healer? How anyone could have done it?"
Gregori turned the full power of his magnetic silver eyes on her. "I can make the earth shake beneath your feet and bring lightning from the sky to do my bidding. I can close off your airway with a thought. I am all things from a mouse to a wolf running free. Is this not enough for you to believe?" he inquired softly.
His voice was a black-magic weapon. That was what Shea believed. She shivered and moved closer to Jacques. They all trusted Gregori, yet wasn't he one of the ancients? They had all told her a vampire could hide itself, appear normal. None of them even suspected him. It was agreed he was the most dangerous, his knowledge acquired unceasingly through the centuries. And he was their healer, had given blood to all of them. Her brain worked at the pieces of the puzzle.
It is impossible.
Jacques caught her thoughts.
Why?
Shea demanded.
Mikhail would know. I do not know how I know this, but Gregori could not hide this from Mikhail.
She gave an exasperated little sigh.
Jacques hid his grin at her feminine petulance. She really had an aversion to the way Gregori dictated to the women.
"There is one human a few miles away," Mikhail stated. "I can detect no others. He is in the direction of Jacques' old home. Do we go?"
Light was streaking the sky now, gray patches despite the dark, roiling clouds and the steady drizzle of rain. "Go, Mikhail," Raven insisted softly. "You have to. Otherwise I would always feel I killed him. If you do not go, it will be because of me."
"You have to," Shea added, looking into Jacques' black eyes. He did, too; Shea felt it with great conviction. There would come a time when Jacques would remember his childhood, his great friendship with Byron, and how he had backed away from Byron's attempt at reconciliation. He needed to do this for the sake of his own sanity.
I know.
Hisreply was a soft assent in her mind as he shared her thoughts. "I will go, Mikhail," he said aloud. "You stay and protect the women. It is the only way."
"It could very well be a trap," Gregori cautioned. "More than likely it is a trap. Otherwise this would be very careless on the part of one so cunning."
"That's why all of you should go," Raven said. "Shea and I will wait here. We can destroy all evidence of her research while we wait."
Shea could not prevent the gasp that escaped her. She lifted her chin defiantly. She was not going to be intimidated by these powerful creatures. Her eyes flashed from one to the other. "I spent several years of my life gathering that data," she said hotly.
Raven caught her hand and squeezed it in warning. She tugged Shea away from Jacques and right up to the door of the cabin. "All right, Shea, we'll talk about it."
"You are to leave this place and go to safety if the hour becomes too late or you receive warning from us," Mikhail cautioned his lifemate. "No playing the heroine. On this I will have your word."
Raven smiled into his eyes, an intimate, tender acknowledgment. She nodded. "I would never endanger our child, my love."
Mikhail reached out and touched Raven's face, trailing his fingertips tenderly down her skin even as his form wavered, contorted, began to snap and pop. Fur shimmered along his arms, his back. His powerful frame bent, and he leapt away, landed running, a large black wolf.
Shea's eyes widened, astonished at the quick change. Seeing the man become a wolf was incredible. Her heart was slamming so loudly she was afraid it might burst. She was uncertain whether it was from excitement and awe or from sheer terror.
Jacques! It is all right, my love.
Tocalm her he leaned close, brushed her forehead with his mouth.
It is the way of our people to utilize the animals around us. It is natural for us. And it helps to protect our skin and eyes from the sun. I'm fine now, wild man. It was a shock.
Shea breathed deeply to overcome her trembling. She found she was clinging to Raven's hand and self-consciously dropped it.
Jacques dropped another kiss on her forehead before he deliberately walked off the porch and into the dense forest, making sure he was out of her sight before his body began to change.
Gregori's silver eyes moved over both women, then settled on Shea. "The child must be protected. It is no use appealing to Raven for logic, as she has none, and Mikhail is so besotted with her that he does not see his first duty, so it is up to you. For the sake of all of us, you must protect this child. Do you understand?"
Shea felt ensnared by those molten eyes. She might not fully comprehend his reasons, but she felt his genuine urgency. She nodded. "I'll watch over her, healer."
"It is not for my sake only, but for humans and Carpathians alike. This child must live, Shea," he reiterated. "She must."
Shea clearly felt the warning, the plea from his otherwise damned soul. This child was his only hope. For the first time she believed he was not the vampire, that his fear of turning was great, the child his only chance of survival. She nodded, meeting his eyes steadily so that he could see she comprehended the dangers.
Out of respect for her, Gregori, too, walked into the forest out of Shea's sight before shape-shifting and loping away toward the ruins of Jacques' old home.
Raven opened the door to the cabin and stepped out of the storm into the shelter of the room. "You'll get used to it. When I first met Mikhail, I didn't have a clue what he was. I thought he was a psychic like me. Believe me, it was a real shock when I found out. I had no idea such a species even existed."
Shea managed a small smile. To be back in her cabin was comforting, with all her familiar things around her. "I'm still not certain I believe any of this. I keep expecting to wake up in my office back in the States." Snagging a towel, she tossed it to Raven and caught up another for herself. Her hair was dripping wet. It was soothing to her to do something so mundane as towel it dry.
"We live relatively normal lives, Shea. Mikhail and I have a beautiful home in this breathtaking land. Mikhail has several businesses. We have friends, good friends. We travel. What happened to Jacques was a terrible tragedy for all of us. I'm glad he has you now, all of us are." Raven curled up in a chair. Daylight was taking its toll on her pregnant body.
Shea leaned against the bed and studied Raven. She was a beautiful woman, a little pale, with unusual blue-violet eyes. "Jacques is still quite ill. He's struggling to remember his life. It's difficult." She paced restlessly. "I worry about him. He doesn't believe he is always sane. There is such torment in him."
Shea? you need me?
Jacques' voice was clear in her mind, anxious, as if he had caught her thoughts.
She realized that Jacques was unable to release her completely. She should have felt resentful, cornered, but the truth was, she felt safe. Already she was becoming accustomed to their closeness.
I'm fine, Jacques. Just take care of yourself.
It was an exhilarating feeling that she could talk across time and space, that she could touch him whenever she wanted or needed, that he would always know when she was troubled.
Shea watched Raven and, noting her elevated breathing, automatically walked over to her to take her pulse. Raven laughed and pulled away. "My husband is being naughty. He likes to keep me thinking about him while he's away from me. I'm fine. They'll drive you crazy, but they're always intriguing and usually lots of fun. It's a good thing, as they have long life spans. Wouldn't it be hell to be stuck for centuries to someone you found incredibly boring?"
"How dangerous is the healer?"
Raven inhaled sharply. "The truth is, Gregori is the most dangerous of all Carpathians. Mikhail thinks Gregori is more powerful than he is, and that's saying quite a bit. He knows things, more than any other. Mikhail fears for him all the time now. If he turned vampire, we'd all be in grave danger. Mikhail loves him. We both do. That's why we decided to try for a baby now rather than later. To produce a lifemate for him. Carpathians never have female children anymore. No one knows why, but the children that are born rarely survive the first year of life. Mikhail and Gregori both believe a human lifemate can produce them a female child, and I guess they're right, since Gregori says this child is a girl. He would know."
"That's why my father wanted a female child so much. My mother never got to tell him she was pregnant, but in her diary she said he had been disappointed when Noelle gave birth to a male child."
"I met your father briefly," Raven said softly. "He was very distraught over Noelle's murder. He wanted to hunt the assassins, but Mikhail told him it was too dangerous, he was too involved. He was sent to sleep for several years."
"He just went to sleep?" Shea was furious for no reason she could actually name. To think of the man sleeping while his wife lay murdered, his mistress pregnant and alone, and some one else raising his son, made her very angry. She had a feeling she would not like her father very much.
"You need to understand these people, Shea, the kind of power they carry, the kind of devastation they're capable of. They can command the land, cause an earthquake that could destroy whole cities. Control is a huge issue with them at all times. Someone like Gregori is a time bomb. He knows it, Mikhail knows it, all of us do. Rand was so distraught, he was dangerous to everyone around him. Mikhail did what he thought was right for the protection of humans and Carpathians alike. Rand obeyed because Mikhail is their chosen leader. He never seemed very attached to anyone, least of all his son. Even now, he is a loner rarely seen. He spends most of his time in the ground."
"And Rand neglected to say anything about my mother to anyone," Shea said bitterly. "My mother's life was destroyed. He could have prevented that."
"I'm sorry, it must have been terrible for you growing up. If your mother was Rand's true lifemate, then she would have been unable to live without him. It is a bonding of the soul." Raven sighed, looked away from the distaste on Shea's face. "Noelle was not Rand's true lifemate. I would like to think she loved him, but by all accounts she was simply obsessed with him. I have no idea why Rand went along with it. Noelle was a foolish woman not to have waited for her true lifemate. Rand is a very good-looking man. She mistook lust for love."
"I have wanted to tell Rand what a worm he is from the first day I ever read my mother's diary. And I don't want to feel about Jacques the way she felt about Rand. Not to the extent that I would neglect a child, live as if I was already dead, just waiting until she was old enough to be on her own."
"Not everyone is strong, Shea," Raven counseled gently. "Look at how long Gregori has lasted without his lifemate. Mikhail and Jacques, Aidan and his brother Julian, have all lasted far longer than most of the others. There have been so many over the years that have turned, not strong enough to hold out. Why? Why Gregori and not this vampire? What happened to your mother would not happen to you because you are not the same person. You're very strong. And your mother had no way of knowing what was happening to her."
Shea paced the length of the room, suddenly restless. The conversation was giving her a knot in her stomach. Was Gregori really capable of creating an earthquake that could destroy cities? Keeping the unborn child safe was even more important than she'd thought. Hundreds, perhaps thousands of lives could depend on it. That was what Gregori was trying to convey to her. He needed this child in order to survive much longer without turning vampire.
"I'm sorry, Shea, you've been thrown into deep water and told to swim without a lesson. I wish I could help you," Raven said softly.
"I feel as if I've been afraid for so long now, I don't know any other way of life," Shea confided. "Jacques depends on me to keep him sane, and now all this is happening. I hope you're right, Raven. I hope I'm very strong."