I shot him an angry look. “What?”
“I’m taking you home.”
“I can get there by myself.”
“Nah. Consider me your chaperone to make sure you don’t sneak back here and try to stick your tongue down his throat again.” He looked over his shoulder. “Roth, go with Connor on patrol. Zach, you take care of my darling soulful brother. Make sure he doesn’t follow after us. Looks like he wants to.”
“Wait a minute,” Connor said. “Bishop’s your brother?”
As Kraven dragged me away, I craned my head over my shoulder to look back at Bishop, anguished at the thought of leaving him like this. His blue eyes burned into mine. Confusion, madness, anger—and desire—all mingled together there in his gaze.
Mix in an extra helping of guilt, and that was exactly how I felt, too.
I wanted to cry, but my tears had dried up. Now my eyes just stung. I wanted to close them and try to shut out every memory of what just happened.
When I first found him, sitting on the sidewalk, lost and confused and unable to find the searchlights, I’d helped him then.
I’d helped destroy him tonight. Less than a week to go from one extreme to the other.
“So you finally got a taste of angel cake,” Kraven said after a few minutes of walking. Each step away from Bishop felt heavy and forced. “Was it worth it?”
“I didn’t mean to do that.”
He finally loosened his grip on me and put some space between us. We’d exited the run-down area of town and entered a neighborhood with tall trees, manicured lawns and fashionable condos. Like night and day in the space of a couple of blocks.
“Right. You’re just an innocent teenager looking for love in all the wrong places.”
Kraven had a truly amazing talent for pissing me off. “You knew about this and you didn’t say anything before. You could have warned him.”
“It was just a hunch. He got the fuzzy end of the lollipop by being the one to enter the city without being shielded. The crazy easily could have come from that. What am I, psychic? That’s your job, sweetness.”
“Will he be all right?”
“From your first kiss? Yeah. He’ll recover. Pretty sure it would have taken a lot longer for you to suck the whole thing out. As for the future…I don’t know. He’s a survivor. Kind of like a cockroach. Just when you think he’s finally dead, he’ll pop right back up again and start flapping his wings.”
All I could do was concentrate on putting one foot in front of the other. My arms were crossed tightly over my chest and I kept my eyes on the sidewalk stretching in front of me. My throat felt so thick it was nearly impossible to swallow. “So what about me?”
“Good question. What about you?”
“Are you really walking me home? Or are you walking me to my doom?”
He eyed me. “Your doom? Sweetness, you watch way too many movies.”
I let out a shuddery breath. “So what do I do now? What you said before? Stay home, close the blinds and hide from the world?”
“Nah. I’m sure you’d end up getting in trouble even there.” He grinned darkly at me. “Go to school like a good girl and keep an eye on that little friend of yours. Also, I’d suggest you stay away from Bishop until this is all over.”
That actually made me laugh sharply.
He frowned. “What’s so funny?”
“You sound like you might just give a crap about what happens to your brother. And here I thought you two hated each other way more than just angel/demon animosity.”
“I feel nothing for him.” His jaw tensed. “Whatever you might think about us is wrong. We had some biology in common once upon a time. That was a long time ago. There’s nothing between us except some bad memories.”
“So you don’t hate him?”
“Hate can be a useful emotion.”
That wasn’t really an answer, not that I was expecting one. I concentrated on him for a moment, surprised that his walls were down. “You do hate him. But not nearly as much as you hate yourself, right?”
I was sorry I said it as soon as the words left my mouth. Due to the lack of a snappy comeback, I thought I’d struck a nerve.
“You shouldn’t feel that way,” I said. “I mean, I don’t know what happened between the two of you when you were both human, but—”
“Just shut up, gray girl. Is that even remotely possible for you?”
I flinched. I took it back: he didn’t just hate himself down deep. He’d made plenty of room in there for me, too.
Twenty long minutes later, when we reached the end of my driveway, I finally chanced a look at him, but he’d already turned and started walking away.
I quickly let myself in the house. The only indication that my mother had been there earlier was the empty wineglass in the sink. As I stood in the dark kitchen, feeling utterly and completely alone in the universe, I noticed something important.
For the first time in nearly a week, I wasn’t hungry at all.
* * *
When my mother got home at a little after ten o’clock, she guessed that my bleak mood was due to the fact I’d finally learned I was adopted. She was so guilty about keeping it from me, it was hard for her to look me in the eye.
I was upset about that, but not as much as she might think. It had been a shock, but it had also helped many things start to make some sort of sense. I wondered what she might think if she found out who my biological parents were.
“I’m taking you home.”
“I can get there by myself.”
“Nah. Consider me your chaperone to make sure you don’t sneak back here and try to stick your tongue down his throat again.” He looked over his shoulder. “Roth, go with Connor on patrol. Zach, you take care of my darling soulful brother. Make sure he doesn’t follow after us. Looks like he wants to.”
“Wait a minute,” Connor said. “Bishop’s your brother?”
As Kraven dragged me away, I craned my head over my shoulder to look back at Bishop, anguished at the thought of leaving him like this. His blue eyes burned into mine. Confusion, madness, anger—and desire—all mingled together there in his gaze.
Mix in an extra helping of guilt, and that was exactly how I felt, too.
I wanted to cry, but my tears had dried up. Now my eyes just stung. I wanted to close them and try to shut out every memory of what just happened.
When I first found him, sitting on the sidewalk, lost and confused and unable to find the searchlights, I’d helped him then.
I’d helped destroy him tonight. Less than a week to go from one extreme to the other.
“So you finally got a taste of angel cake,” Kraven said after a few minutes of walking. Each step away from Bishop felt heavy and forced. “Was it worth it?”
“I didn’t mean to do that.”
He finally loosened his grip on me and put some space between us. We’d exited the run-down area of town and entered a neighborhood with tall trees, manicured lawns and fashionable condos. Like night and day in the space of a couple of blocks.
“Right. You’re just an innocent teenager looking for love in all the wrong places.”
Kraven had a truly amazing talent for pissing me off. “You knew about this and you didn’t say anything before. You could have warned him.”
“It was just a hunch. He got the fuzzy end of the lollipop by being the one to enter the city without being shielded. The crazy easily could have come from that. What am I, psychic? That’s your job, sweetness.”
“Will he be all right?”
“From your first kiss? Yeah. He’ll recover. Pretty sure it would have taken a lot longer for you to suck the whole thing out. As for the future…I don’t know. He’s a survivor. Kind of like a cockroach. Just when you think he’s finally dead, he’ll pop right back up again and start flapping his wings.”
All I could do was concentrate on putting one foot in front of the other. My arms were crossed tightly over my chest and I kept my eyes on the sidewalk stretching in front of me. My throat felt so thick it was nearly impossible to swallow. “So what about me?”
“Good question. What about you?”
“Are you really walking me home? Or are you walking me to my doom?”
He eyed me. “Your doom? Sweetness, you watch way too many movies.”
I let out a shuddery breath. “So what do I do now? What you said before? Stay home, close the blinds and hide from the world?”
“Nah. I’m sure you’d end up getting in trouble even there.” He grinned darkly at me. “Go to school like a good girl and keep an eye on that little friend of yours. Also, I’d suggest you stay away from Bishop until this is all over.”
That actually made me laugh sharply.
He frowned. “What’s so funny?”
“You sound like you might just give a crap about what happens to your brother. And here I thought you two hated each other way more than just angel/demon animosity.”
“I feel nothing for him.” His jaw tensed. “Whatever you might think about us is wrong. We had some biology in common once upon a time. That was a long time ago. There’s nothing between us except some bad memories.”
“So you don’t hate him?”
“Hate can be a useful emotion.”
That wasn’t really an answer, not that I was expecting one. I concentrated on him for a moment, surprised that his walls were down. “You do hate him. But not nearly as much as you hate yourself, right?”
I was sorry I said it as soon as the words left my mouth. Due to the lack of a snappy comeback, I thought I’d struck a nerve.
“You shouldn’t feel that way,” I said. “I mean, I don’t know what happened between the two of you when you were both human, but—”
“Just shut up, gray girl. Is that even remotely possible for you?”
I flinched. I took it back: he didn’t just hate himself down deep. He’d made plenty of room in there for me, too.
Twenty long minutes later, when we reached the end of my driveway, I finally chanced a look at him, but he’d already turned and started walking away.
I quickly let myself in the house. The only indication that my mother had been there earlier was the empty wineglass in the sink. As I stood in the dark kitchen, feeling utterly and completely alone in the universe, I noticed something important.
For the first time in nearly a week, I wasn’t hungry at all.
* * *
When my mother got home at a little after ten o’clock, she guessed that my bleak mood was due to the fact I’d finally learned I was adopted. She was so guilty about keeping it from me, it was hard for her to look me in the eye.
I was upset about that, but not as much as she might think. It had been a shock, but it had also helped many things start to make some sort of sense. I wondered what she might think if she found out who my biological parents were.
