“I was too focused on how good your hands felt to remember to use a condom. I could have accidently gotten you pregnant.”
“Yeah, that was five days of waiting I’ll never forget.”
“This time will be different.”
“No. I’m done with casual sex.”
“There’s nothing casual between us.”
“My point exactly.”
He lifted one leg and gently nudged hers. She locked them together, shaking her head. “No.”
“Spread open for me.”
“Darkness, don’t seduce me just to be an ass**le.”
“I’m not.”
“Right. We have sex and then what? You tell me to leave again? That the job offer and living in the apartment were just bullshit?”
“You’re not living in the women’s dorm.”
“You said that’s where Missy was.”
“She is. That’s her new home.”
“She gets to stay at Homeland but I don’t?”
“You’re going to stay here with me.”
She had to be hearing him wrong.
“This is our house,” he said as he nudged her leg again. “Our bedroom. Our bed.” He rolled over suddenly, taking her with him. “And there will be no more regrets.”
Kat ended up sprawled on top of him. She spread her legs and straddled his lap, pushing against his chest until she sat atop him. “What kind of game are you playing?”
“I’m not. You’re important to me. I don’t want to lose you.”
He looked sincere and it made her angry. “Are you kidding me?”
Darkness growled, his mood matching hers. “Do I look as if I’m telling a joke? I got us a house. We shouldn’t have to live in the men’s dorm where other males can hear everything through the walls.”
“You don’t do relationships. You don’t let anyone get too close to you. What changed? I almost died? That’s what you’re saying?”
“Yes.”
“What about tomorrow or next week when you get over the fact that I had a close call? You shut down again and build up the walls? No thanks.”
He sat up, almost knocking her off his lap. His arms hooked around her waist and he jerked her tightly against his chest until they were almost hugging. “I tried to resist the emotions you bring forth. I regretted it when you left Homeland.”
“Which time?”
“Both.”
“But you let me go a second time.”
“What do you want from me, Kat? I got us a house and I promise not to restrain you during sex anymore. I’m offering to share my life with you.”
“Do you want a list?”
“Yes.”
“You’re never home. I lived with you before.”
“I’ll work fewer hours and spend more time with you.”
She wanted to believe him. “You don’t like to talk. I do.”
“I’m talking to you now.”
“That’s only because you want to have sex. That motivates any guy to be a chatterbox if he thinks it’s going to get a woman’s pants down.”
“You want proof that I’m going to do everything to be the kind of male a female mates?”
She couldn’t believe he used that word. “Mates?”
“Mates,” he growled. “That’s what you want.”
“It’s not what you want.”
“I want you.”
“For sex.”
“Work with me this time, Kat.” His tone softened. “I’m trying.”
Tears filled her eyes and she blinked them back. “I don’t want to get my heart stomped on.”
“I won’t hurt you.”
“You won’t mean to. That, I believe.”
Darkness was frustrated. He’d expected Kat to allow him to kiss her and just agree to move in with him. Instead she was sitting on his lap and he felt as if he were holding her in place. She might put space between them if he allowed it. He wasn’t going to.
She wanted him to talk to her. It wasn’t easy to express his feelings. Losing her wasn’t an option. “I feel things for you.”
She wiggled on his lap. “I feel. You’re hard.”
“You’re in my arms.”
“I need more than just sex.”
“I had a nightmare when you were sleeping next to me.”
“I bet.”
He flashed his fangs. “May I finish talking?”
“Sure.”
“You were on top of me, touching me, and it turned into a nightmare.”
“This is just getting better and better. I’m sorry that’s traumatizing to you.”
He rolled, pinning her under him again. This time she couldn’t close her thighs—his h*ps pinned them open. He was careful to keep most of his weight off her and was aware of her bandages. He didn’t want to hurt her in any way.
“It was about that female who betrayed me. I trusted Galina. She tried to stick a blade in my heart after I learned she was the reason my brothers died. In the dream you became her and she actually killed me. I’d let my guard down for you and I died in the dream because of it.”
Kat’s expression showed sadness. “That’s rough.”
“It motivated me to keep you distanced. I thought I could ignore the emotions you stirred in me and they would fade if you weren’t a part of my life. They didn’t. You said it would happen and you were right. Distance isn’t going to make me want you any less. It just makes me miserable when you’re gone.”
“Yeah, that was five days of waiting I’ll never forget.”
“This time will be different.”
“No. I’m done with casual sex.”
“There’s nothing casual between us.”
“My point exactly.”
He lifted one leg and gently nudged hers. She locked them together, shaking her head. “No.”
“Spread open for me.”
“Darkness, don’t seduce me just to be an ass**le.”
“I’m not.”
“Right. We have sex and then what? You tell me to leave again? That the job offer and living in the apartment were just bullshit?”
“You’re not living in the women’s dorm.”
“You said that’s where Missy was.”
“She is. That’s her new home.”
“She gets to stay at Homeland but I don’t?”
“You’re going to stay here with me.”
She had to be hearing him wrong.
“This is our house,” he said as he nudged her leg again. “Our bedroom. Our bed.” He rolled over suddenly, taking her with him. “And there will be no more regrets.”
Kat ended up sprawled on top of him. She spread her legs and straddled his lap, pushing against his chest until she sat atop him. “What kind of game are you playing?”
“I’m not. You’re important to me. I don’t want to lose you.”
He looked sincere and it made her angry. “Are you kidding me?”
Darkness growled, his mood matching hers. “Do I look as if I’m telling a joke? I got us a house. We shouldn’t have to live in the men’s dorm where other males can hear everything through the walls.”
“You don’t do relationships. You don’t let anyone get too close to you. What changed? I almost died? That’s what you’re saying?”
“Yes.”
“What about tomorrow or next week when you get over the fact that I had a close call? You shut down again and build up the walls? No thanks.”
He sat up, almost knocking her off his lap. His arms hooked around her waist and he jerked her tightly against his chest until they were almost hugging. “I tried to resist the emotions you bring forth. I regretted it when you left Homeland.”
“Which time?”
“Both.”
“But you let me go a second time.”
“What do you want from me, Kat? I got us a house and I promise not to restrain you during sex anymore. I’m offering to share my life with you.”
“Do you want a list?”
“Yes.”
“You’re never home. I lived with you before.”
“I’ll work fewer hours and spend more time with you.”
She wanted to believe him. “You don’t like to talk. I do.”
“I’m talking to you now.”
“That’s only because you want to have sex. That motivates any guy to be a chatterbox if he thinks it’s going to get a woman’s pants down.”
“You want proof that I’m going to do everything to be the kind of male a female mates?”
She couldn’t believe he used that word. “Mates?”
“Mates,” he growled. “That’s what you want.”
“It’s not what you want.”
“I want you.”
“For sex.”
“Work with me this time, Kat.” His tone softened. “I’m trying.”
Tears filled her eyes and she blinked them back. “I don’t want to get my heart stomped on.”
“I won’t hurt you.”
“You won’t mean to. That, I believe.”
Darkness was frustrated. He’d expected Kat to allow him to kiss her and just agree to move in with him. Instead she was sitting on his lap and he felt as if he were holding her in place. She might put space between them if he allowed it. He wasn’t going to.
She wanted him to talk to her. It wasn’t easy to express his feelings. Losing her wasn’t an option. “I feel things for you.”
She wiggled on his lap. “I feel. You’re hard.”
“You’re in my arms.”
“I need more than just sex.”
“I had a nightmare when you were sleeping next to me.”
“I bet.”
He flashed his fangs. “May I finish talking?”
“Sure.”
“You were on top of me, touching me, and it turned into a nightmare.”
“This is just getting better and better. I’m sorry that’s traumatizing to you.”
He rolled, pinning her under him again. This time she couldn’t close her thighs—his h*ps pinned them open. He was careful to keep most of his weight off her and was aware of her bandages. He didn’t want to hurt her in any way.
“It was about that female who betrayed me. I trusted Galina. She tried to stick a blade in my heart after I learned she was the reason my brothers died. In the dream you became her and she actually killed me. I’d let my guard down for you and I died in the dream because of it.”
Kat’s expression showed sadness. “That’s rough.”
“It motivated me to keep you distanced. I thought I could ignore the emotions you stirred in me and they would fade if you weren’t a part of my life. They didn’t. You said it would happen and you were right. Distance isn’t going to make me want you any less. It just makes me miserable when you’re gone.”
