Double Dare
Page 43
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“Since I was fifteen,” she finally admitted, making him shake his head in disgust, because everything made sense now.
“That was the real reason that you dropped out of school, wasn’t it?” he asked, already knowing the truth and realizing that there was one more lie that he could add to the list.
“I couldn’t keep up with the work after the first surgery and-”
“Surgery?” he snapped, cutting her off as he turned around to face her.
“They tried to remove the scar tissue,” she said, sitting on the edge of the loveseat, staring down at her trembling hands, “but it just kept growing back.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked, choking out the words as he remembered the time when she’d started skipping school.
He remembered sneaking into her room at night and bitching about how much he hated school without her, bitching about homework, chores and all the bullshit that fifteen year old boys bitched and whined about, hoping to get her to tell him what was going on all while she laid there, resting her head on his shoulder and toying with the buttons on his shirt. They usually lay there talking about absolutely nothing or watched movies until her mother either called them for dinner or kicked him out. He also remembered the times when he’d snuck in her room only to find a note telling him that she was spending some time at her Dad’s, which had never made sense to him since her father was a fucking asshole, who couldn’t be bothered with her.
Now it all made sense.
“I didn’t want to worry you.”
“You didn’t want to worry me?” he asked with a humorless chuckle as he thought about how much he used to worry about her when she’d suddenly disappear or when he found her crying and she wouldn’t tell him why.
He’d been scared out of his fucking mind.
“I asked you what was going on!” he snapped, furious at her, at himself for not pushing the issue and making her tell him, and at this whole fucking situation in general.
No children…
They were never going to have children, he realized, gasping for air as he turned around and grabbed onto the windowsill. He closed his eyes and dropped his head forward, trying to keep it together, but it was a losing battle. There would be no little boys wearing the Bradford smile stealing his food or little girls with the devilish glint in their eye that matched their mother’s, wrapping him around their little fingers. They would never hold their baby, watch him grow up and have children of his own one day. They would never have the family that he’d dreamed of giving her.
“It had nothing to do with you, Dar-”
“It had every fucking thing to do with me!” he shouted, gripping the windowsill as grief slammed into him. “You should have told me. You should have fucking told me!”
“Darrin, I’m so-”
“Don’t,” he said, cutting her off as he squeezed his eyes shut, because he didn’t think that he could handle hearing her tell him how sorry she was.
“I never planned on telling you,” she explained, confirming what he should have known all this time.
“Because you were never planning on giving me anything more than sex.”
“I have nothing else to give you!” she screamed as he suddenly found himself yanked back until he was facing her. She shoved him back against the wall until he found himself staring down at the beautiful tear streaked face of the woman that had fucking played him.
“You had everything to give me!” he shouted back, getting in her face.
He was so fucking angry that he could barely see straight.
She’d wasted six fucking years!
Six fucking years that they could have been happy together! He would have been devastated that they couldn’t have children, but he would have had her.
“You want a family,” she said, getting back into his face, “and I can’t give that to you!”
“You are my fucking family!”
“No, I’m not,” she bit out, glaring up at him through watery eyes as she stepped away from him, “and I’m not going to be the one that keeps you from having one.”
“No,” he said, shaking his head, glad that they were finally in agreement about something, “you won’t.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” she asked, her expression instantly shifting to wary and for damn good reason.
She’d been around him and his family long enough to know when something seriously fucked up was about to happen.
“It means that you have a choice to make,” he said coldly, not caring that she was going to hate him for this, not after what she did.
“Darrin,” she said, suddenly looking every bit as exhausted as he felt, “let’s just talk about this.”
He ignored her, because there was nothing to talk about as far as he was concerned. “You have a choice to make. Marry me today or let me walk away.”
She shook her head slowly, the tears rolling down her beautiful face, giving him his answer without a word. “I can’t,” she choked out around a sob. “I just can’t do that.”
Jaw clenched shut tightly, he nodded as he stepped past her and headed for the door. “Goodbye, Marybeth.”
Chapter 21
Three Weeks Later…
“Are you still mad at me?” Jake asked as they sat there, waiting to pull up to the curb so that she could get out and be miserable in a different state for the next two weeks.
“That was the real reason that you dropped out of school, wasn’t it?” he asked, already knowing the truth and realizing that there was one more lie that he could add to the list.
“I couldn’t keep up with the work after the first surgery and-”
“Surgery?” he snapped, cutting her off as he turned around to face her.
“They tried to remove the scar tissue,” she said, sitting on the edge of the loveseat, staring down at her trembling hands, “but it just kept growing back.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked, choking out the words as he remembered the time when she’d started skipping school.
He remembered sneaking into her room at night and bitching about how much he hated school without her, bitching about homework, chores and all the bullshit that fifteen year old boys bitched and whined about, hoping to get her to tell him what was going on all while she laid there, resting her head on his shoulder and toying with the buttons on his shirt. They usually lay there talking about absolutely nothing or watched movies until her mother either called them for dinner or kicked him out. He also remembered the times when he’d snuck in her room only to find a note telling him that she was spending some time at her Dad’s, which had never made sense to him since her father was a fucking asshole, who couldn’t be bothered with her.
Now it all made sense.
“I didn’t want to worry you.”
“You didn’t want to worry me?” he asked with a humorless chuckle as he thought about how much he used to worry about her when she’d suddenly disappear or when he found her crying and she wouldn’t tell him why.
He’d been scared out of his fucking mind.
“I asked you what was going on!” he snapped, furious at her, at himself for not pushing the issue and making her tell him, and at this whole fucking situation in general.
No children…
They were never going to have children, he realized, gasping for air as he turned around and grabbed onto the windowsill. He closed his eyes and dropped his head forward, trying to keep it together, but it was a losing battle. There would be no little boys wearing the Bradford smile stealing his food or little girls with the devilish glint in their eye that matched their mother’s, wrapping him around their little fingers. They would never hold their baby, watch him grow up and have children of his own one day. They would never have the family that he’d dreamed of giving her.
“It had nothing to do with you, Dar-”
“It had every fucking thing to do with me!” he shouted, gripping the windowsill as grief slammed into him. “You should have told me. You should have fucking told me!”
“Darrin, I’m so-”
“Don’t,” he said, cutting her off as he squeezed his eyes shut, because he didn’t think that he could handle hearing her tell him how sorry she was.
“I never planned on telling you,” she explained, confirming what he should have known all this time.
“Because you were never planning on giving me anything more than sex.”
“I have nothing else to give you!” she screamed as he suddenly found himself yanked back until he was facing her. She shoved him back against the wall until he found himself staring down at the beautiful tear streaked face of the woman that had fucking played him.
“You had everything to give me!” he shouted back, getting in her face.
He was so fucking angry that he could barely see straight.
She’d wasted six fucking years!
Six fucking years that they could have been happy together! He would have been devastated that they couldn’t have children, but he would have had her.
“You want a family,” she said, getting back into his face, “and I can’t give that to you!”
“You are my fucking family!”
“No, I’m not,” she bit out, glaring up at him through watery eyes as she stepped away from him, “and I’m not going to be the one that keeps you from having one.”
“No,” he said, shaking his head, glad that they were finally in agreement about something, “you won’t.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” she asked, her expression instantly shifting to wary and for damn good reason.
She’d been around him and his family long enough to know when something seriously fucked up was about to happen.
“It means that you have a choice to make,” he said coldly, not caring that she was going to hate him for this, not after what she did.
“Darrin,” she said, suddenly looking every bit as exhausted as he felt, “let’s just talk about this.”
He ignored her, because there was nothing to talk about as far as he was concerned. “You have a choice to make. Marry me today or let me walk away.”
She shook her head slowly, the tears rolling down her beautiful face, giving him his answer without a word. “I can’t,” she choked out around a sob. “I just can’t do that.”
Jaw clenched shut tightly, he nodded as he stepped past her and headed for the door. “Goodbye, Marybeth.”
Chapter 21
Three Weeks Later…
“Are you still mad at me?” Jake asked as they sat there, waiting to pull up to the curb so that she could get out and be miserable in a different state for the next two weeks.
