My eyes widened as I listened to my boyfriend greet my ex-boyfriend. It was...odd. I knew they still talked, I still talked with Denny too, it just rarely happened when I was in the room. Tilting my head, I considered leaving Kellan to have a private conversation with the man that I knew he still considered family, despite everything.
Just as my body turned away, Kellan's voice stopped me. "Yeah...she's right here...hold on."
I twisted back to Kellan holding the receiver of the clunky, green phone out to me. Shrugging a little, he whispered, "He called here for you."
His face and voice were smooth as he said it, but I thought I saw a slight crease in his brow, and I wondered how he really felt about me still talking to Denny. Knowing he had nothing to worry about there, since Denny and I were completely over, not to mention distanced by thousands of miles since Denny was back home in Australia, I smiled comfortingly and grabbed the phone from him. Kellan remained where he was against the counter, making no attempt to leave me to my privacy. I could understand why.
The butterflies in my stomach flared up again as I brought the receiver to my ear. It had been a while since I'd talked with Denny last, a couple of months actually. The time apart was making me nervous to talk to him again. Well, that and Kellan standing a foot away from me. Remembering that Denny was still a good friend to both of us, I relaxed as I greeted him. "Good morning, Denny."
He laughed, the sound instantly taking me back to the countless lazy afternoons we'd spent together in Ohio. It tightened my heart a little bit. Over or not, I still missed him. "Actually, it's evening here. Did I wake you?"
His accent was thicker now that he was back at home. It was delicious to the ear and I smiled and laughed at his comment, remembering the massive time change between us. "No, Kellan and I are up."
I bit my lip, also remembering that he'd called me here, and had asked if I was awake, which meant he figured I'd spent the night, which meant he probably also assumed I'd slept with Kellan, in the figurative sense. And he'd be right, if he thought that. I hated him thinking about it, much like I still hated to think about him with his current girlfriend, a sweet woman named Abby that he'd been with for a while now, longer than Kellan and I had officially been together.
He didn't react to me lumping myself together with the man who'd stolen me away from him, though. Kellan, however, smiled devilishly. "Ah, good. Did I miss it?" Denny asked anxiously.
I furrowed my brow and shook my head. "Miss what?" Kellan repeated my gesture and I shrugged at him.
Denny quickly filled in the blanks for me. "Your first day back to school. Is it today, or did I miss it?"
My mouth dropped open as I understood why he was calling. "Did you call just to wish me good luck on my first day of school?" Tears stung my eyes that he would still be so sweet to me. He shouldn't, not after everything I'd done to him. He should curse my name and vow eternal vengeance on me. But that...just wasn't Denny.
I heard him clear his throat and pictured him running a hand through his piecey, dark hair, a goofy smile on his beautiful face. "Well, yeah, I know how nervous you get about stuff like that." He paused and my throat dried up, amazed and stunned by his level of forgiveness. Kellan narrowed his eyes at my reaction, but didn't say anything. In the silence, Denny asked, "Should I not have called, Kiera? Is this...weird?"
Swallowing repeatedly, I shook my head. "No, no, I'm sorry. Yes, of course you should call me. And no, you didn't miss it, and yes, I'm a little nervous." Not liking the tension that had built up, I said all of that really fast.
Kellan crossed his arms over his chest and tilted his head, but Denny laughed. "Oh, okay, good. Well, I just wanted to wish you well, and let you know that I was...thinking about you today."
He cleared his throat again while I blinked back the tears again. God, he was just too good of a person. Sometimes I thought I was an idiot for ever hurting him. Okay, all the time I thought I was an idiot for hurting him.
"Thank you, Denny...for remembering. That was incredibly sweet of you." I felt a flush creep over my face as I peeked up at Kellan. He sniffed and quickly looked away. I felt that age-old guilt wash over me. And just when I thought I'd never have to feel guilty again too.
Softly, Denny responded with, "No problem, Kiera. I know that Kellan," he swallowed after saying his name, "is probably doing a lot to help you out today, so you probably don't need to hear it from me, but, good luck."
Not knowing how else to respond, I only whispered, "Thank you, Denny." Kellan, still not looking at me, took a step away. I immediately grabbed his arm. He paused, but still wouldn't look back at me.
Denny laughed a little into the receiver. "Uh, and tell your sister sorry for me. I called there first and I'm pretty sure I woke her up."
Smiling, I laughed. Anna did not like being woken up early in the morning. "Yeah, I'll be certain to do that." Kellan's arm under my fingers turned rigid, but he stayed where he was, staring at the coffee pot like it was the most important thing in the universe. I hated that this was bothering him, but it shouldn't. Denny and I were nothing anymore, and he knew that.
I soothingly stroked his arm with my thumb as Denny laughed and said, "Well, Abby and I are at a party for work, so I should get going. She'll fillet me if I stay on the phone all night."
Laughing lightly, I told him, "Alright. Tell Abby hi for me, and have fun." After he responded that he would, I turned from Kellan, angling my head away from him. "Hey, thank you so much for remembering, Denny...that means a lot to me." Before he could respond, I added, "I'm so sorry, Denny, about everything."
He sniffed and was quiet a moment, then, "Yeah, I know, Kiera. Have a great day at school. I'll talk to you later, goodbye."
Closing my eyes for a second, I exhaled, "Bye."
Hanging up the phone, I kept my eyes closed as I twisted back to Kellan. When I opened them, he was still staring at the dark coffee resting in the full pot. Although his face was blank, a myriad of emotions were shifting through his eyes. He took another long second, then finally looked back at me.
Smiling encouragingly, I brushed a strand of hair off his forehead. "Hey, you okay?"
He nodded, a smile seamlessly brightening his face, if not his eyes. "Of course, I'm fine. Denny called to wish you luck, that was nice of him." There wasn't a trace of jealousy or sarcasm in his voice, but I heard it anyway.
Sighing, I laced my arms around his neck. "You know that doesn't mean anything, right? You know that I love you, and Denny is nothing more than a friend now, don't you?" I searched his eyes as his smile faltered. "Don't you?"
He started to look towards the pot again and I caught his cheek, making him look at me. His smile returned, perfectly natural. "Yes, I know, Kiera." In a softer voice he added, "I know exactly what you and Denny are."
Not entirely sure what he meant by that, I decided to just take it at face value. Leaning up, I gave him a soft kiss. "Good. Because, although he's important to me, you're more important, and I don't want me talking with him to hurt you."
His eyes widened as he stared down at me, like he really was surprised to hear me say that. It hurt my heart a little that he still didn't understand-I'd chosen him, I loved him. Kissing him again, I whispered, "I know what you're thinking, and you're wrong. You're not second. I could have fled to him, but I went to you. I couldn't live without you. I chose you. I love you."
Swallowing, his eyes searching mine moistened. "It still feels...unreal...I guess. I'm not used to being...loved by someone. I keep waiting to wake up."
Biting my lip, I shook my head. "Well get used to it. I'm not going anywhere, Kellan."
After a leisurely breakfast, Kellan helped me get ready for school. Well, okay, Kellan laid out on his bed and stared while I got dressed. I'd already had to tell him that he couldn't help me in the shower. Firmly pointing at him to stay put on his pillows, I proceeded to slip my bra on under my towel. Kellan shook his head at me, rolling his eyes. "I've seen you nak*d, you know?"
Flushing as I turned around, I muttered, "I know, but you just staring at me like that is...different."
He snorted and I peeked over my shoulder at him as I slipped on some clean underwear, also under my towel.
Grinning crookedly, he raised an eyebrow. "It's just skin, Kiera." Sitting up and scooting to the edge of the bed, where he could just reach me, he grabbed my knee. His hand started to slide up my leg. "And it's far too beautiful to keep covered up."
Loving the shivers he was sending up my body, but knowing that I couldn't lounge in a bed with him today, unfortunately, I stepped away and again pointed to his pillows. "I don't need to get you any more riled up than you constantly are, by giving you a peep show."
Expertly slipping on my jeans while still having the towel firmly around my chest, I watched him chuckle and relax back down on his mattress. "Fine," he muttered sullenly. "I'll just remember that the next time you're staring at my body."
I paused in pulling my blouse out of my bag and met his eye. Knowing that I actually did stare at him quite a bit, I sighed and let the towel drop to the floor. His smile was glorious as he took in my plain, cream-colored bra and I looked away, embarrassed and a little turned on by his attention.
Quickly counting to five, figuring that was long enough for him to have a decent mental picture for the day, I tossed on my fitted, button-up shirt. Pulling my long hair out of the back, the bulk of it still damp, I rolled my eyes at the heat in his expression while he continued to stare at my covered-up chest. Men.
Clearing my throat finally brought his eyesight up. Locking gazes with me, he smiled devilishly. "Well now I'm turned on and you can't go. You're just going to have to stay here with me today."
Laughing, I leaned over the bed to kiss him. He seemed to think that was a green light and grabbed my body, pulling me on top of him. Giggling in his mouth while we softly moved against the other, I was grateful that his mood had improved from the conversation earlier this morning. I really didn't like him down about Denny, especially since he had no reason to be. I understood though. I'd hurt him so many times while I'd been with Denny. Both of them really. I had no desire to ever hurt a man again.
As our kiss got more intense, Kellan's body started telling me that he really hadn't been kidding about being in the mood. I reluctantly pulled away from his mouth. "I wish I could stay with you." Frowning, I sulked. "I'm not really looking forward to today."
Sighing, he cupped my cheeks and searched my eyes. "Someday, I'll get you to feel like the confident woman who was prancing around in her underwear last night, all of the time." Running his hand back through my hair, he added. "You are a beautiful, intelligent woman with a boyfriend who adores you. You have nothing to fear...ever."
Smiling, I blushed and looked away. "Easy for you to say, rock star."
Pulling back, I stood and found my comb. Running it through my locks, I watched him laugh and sit up. "I get nervous."
I gave him a very wry smile as I stopped mid-stroke. Yeah, right. Kellan Kyle was never nervous. Not around people. Not about his body or his looks. He oozed confidence in nearly everything he did.
Just as my body turned away, Kellan's voice stopped me. "Yeah...she's right here...hold on."
I twisted back to Kellan holding the receiver of the clunky, green phone out to me. Shrugging a little, he whispered, "He called here for you."
His face and voice were smooth as he said it, but I thought I saw a slight crease in his brow, and I wondered how he really felt about me still talking to Denny. Knowing he had nothing to worry about there, since Denny and I were completely over, not to mention distanced by thousands of miles since Denny was back home in Australia, I smiled comfortingly and grabbed the phone from him. Kellan remained where he was against the counter, making no attempt to leave me to my privacy. I could understand why.
The butterflies in my stomach flared up again as I brought the receiver to my ear. It had been a while since I'd talked with Denny last, a couple of months actually. The time apart was making me nervous to talk to him again. Well, that and Kellan standing a foot away from me. Remembering that Denny was still a good friend to both of us, I relaxed as I greeted him. "Good morning, Denny."
He laughed, the sound instantly taking me back to the countless lazy afternoons we'd spent together in Ohio. It tightened my heart a little bit. Over or not, I still missed him. "Actually, it's evening here. Did I wake you?"
His accent was thicker now that he was back at home. It was delicious to the ear and I smiled and laughed at his comment, remembering the massive time change between us. "No, Kellan and I are up."
I bit my lip, also remembering that he'd called me here, and had asked if I was awake, which meant he figured I'd spent the night, which meant he probably also assumed I'd slept with Kellan, in the figurative sense. And he'd be right, if he thought that. I hated him thinking about it, much like I still hated to think about him with his current girlfriend, a sweet woman named Abby that he'd been with for a while now, longer than Kellan and I had officially been together.
He didn't react to me lumping myself together with the man who'd stolen me away from him, though. Kellan, however, smiled devilishly. "Ah, good. Did I miss it?" Denny asked anxiously.
I furrowed my brow and shook my head. "Miss what?" Kellan repeated my gesture and I shrugged at him.
Denny quickly filled in the blanks for me. "Your first day back to school. Is it today, or did I miss it?"
My mouth dropped open as I understood why he was calling. "Did you call just to wish me good luck on my first day of school?" Tears stung my eyes that he would still be so sweet to me. He shouldn't, not after everything I'd done to him. He should curse my name and vow eternal vengeance on me. But that...just wasn't Denny.
I heard him clear his throat and pictured him running a hand through his piecey, dark hair, a goofy smile on his beautiful face. "Well, yeah, I know how nervous you get about stuff like that." He paused and my throat dried up, amazed and stunned by his level of forgiveness. Kellan narrowed his eyes at my reaction, but didn't say anything. In the silence, Denny asked, "Should I not have called, Kiera? Is this...weird?"
Swallowing repeatedly, I shook my head. "No, no, I'm sorry. Yes, of course you should call me. And no, you didn't miss it, and yes, I'm a little nervous." Not liking the tension that had built up, I said all of that really fast.
Kellan crossed his arms over his chest and tilted his head, but Denny laughed. "Oh, okay, good. Well, I just wanted to wish you well, and let you know that I was...thinking about you today."
He cleared his throat again while I blinked back the tears again. God, he was just too good of a person. Sometimes I thought I was an idiot for ever hurting him. Okay, all the time I thought I was an idiot for hurting him.
"Thank you, Denny...for remembering. That was incredibly sweet of you." I felt a flush creep over my face as I peeked up at Kellan. He sniffed and quickly looked away. I felt that age-old guilt wash over me. And just when I thought I'd never have to feel guilty again too.
Softly, Denny responded with, "No problem, Kiera. I know that Kellan," he swallowed after saying his name, "is probably doing a lot to help you out today, so you probably don't need to hear it from me, but, good luck."
Not knowing how else to respond, I only whispered, "Thank you, Denny." Kellan, still not looking at me, took a step away. I immediately grabbed his arm. He paused, but still wouldn't look back at me.
Denny laughed a little into the receiver. "Uh, and tell your sister sorry for me. I called there first and I'm pretty sure I woke her up."
Smiling, I laughed. Anna did not like being woken up early in the morning. "Yeah, I'll be certain to do that." Kellan's arm under my fingers turned rigid, but he stayed where he was, staring at the coffee pot like it was the most important thing in the universe. I hated that this was bothering him, but it shouldn't. Denny and I were nothing anymore, and he knew that.
I soothingly stroked his arm with my thumb as Denny laughed and said, "Well, Abby and I are at a party for work, so I should get going. She'll fillet me if I stay on the phone all night."
Laughing lightly, I told him, "Alright. Tell Abby hi for me, and have fun." After he responded that he would, I turned from Kellan, angling my head away from him. "Hey, thank you so much for remembering, Denny...that means a lot to me." Before he could respond, I added, "I'm so sorry, Denny, about everything."
He sniffed and was quiet a moment, then, "Yeah, I know, Kiera. Have a great day at school. I'll talk to you later, goodbye."
Closing my eyes for a second, I exhaled, "Bye."
Hanging up the phone, I kept my eyes closed as I twisted back to Kellan. When I opened them, he was still staring at the dark coffee resting in the full pot. Although his face was blank, a myriad of emotions were shifting through his eyes. He took another long second, then finally looked back at me.
Smiling encouragingly, I brushed a strand of hair off his forehead. "Hey, you okay?"
He nodded, a smile seamlessly brightening his face, if not his eyes. "Of course, I'm fine. Denny called to wish you luck, that was nice of him." There wasn't a trace of jealousy or sarcasm in his voice, but I heard it anyway.
Sighing, I laced my arms around his neck. "You know that doesn't mean anything, right? You know that I love you, and Denny is nothing more than a friend now, don't you?" I searched his eyes as his smile faltered. "Don't you?"
He started to look towards the pot again and I caught his cheek, making him look at me. His smile returned, perfectly natural. "Yes, I know, Kiera." In a softer voice he added, "I know exactly what you and Denny are."
Not entirely sure what he meant by that, I decided to just take it at face value. Leaning up, I gave him a soft kiss. "Good. Because, although he's important to me, you're more important, and I don't want me talking with him to hurt you."
His eyes widened as he stared down at me, like he really was surprised to hear me say that. It hurt my heart a little that he still didn't understand-I'd chosen him, I loved him. Kissing him again, I whispered, "I know what you're thinking, and you're wrong. You're not second. I could have fled to him, but I went to you. I couldn't live without you. I chose you. I love you."
Swallowing, his eyes searching mine moistened. "It still feels...unreal...I guess. I'm not used to being...loved by someone. I keep waiting to wake up."
Biting my lip, I shook my head. "Well get used to it. I'm not going anywhere, Kellan."
After a leisurely breakfast, Kellan helped me get ready for school. Well, okay, Kellan laid out on his bed and stared while I got dressed. I'd already had to tell him that he couldn't help me in the shower. Firmly pointing at him to stay put on his pillows, I proceeded to slip my bra on under my towel. Kellan shook his head at me, rolling his eyes. "I've seen you nak*d, you know?"
Flushing as I turned around, I muttered, "I know, but you just staring at me like that is...different."
He snorted and I peeked over my shoulder at him as I slipped on some clean underwear, also under my towel.
Grinning crookedly, he raised an eyebrow. "It's just skin, Kiera." Sitting up and scooting to the edge of the bed, where he could just reach me, he grabbed my knee. His hand started to slide up my leg. "And it's far too beautiful to keep covered up."
Loving the shivers he was sending up my body, but knowing that I couldn't lounge in a bed with him today, unfortunately, I stepped away and again pointed to his pillows. "I don't need to get you any more riled up than you constantly are, by giving you a peep show."
Expertly slipping on my jeans while still having the towel firmly around my chest, I watched him chuckle and relax back down on his mattress. "Fine," he muttered sullenly. "I'll just remember that the next time you're staring at my body."
I paused in pulling my blouse out of my bag and met his eye. Knowing that I actually did stare at him quite a bit, I sighed and let the towel drop to the floor. His smile was glorious as he took in my plain, cream-colored bra and I looked away, embarrassed and a little turned on by his attention.
Quickly counting to five, figuring that was long enough for him to have a decent mental picture for the day, I tossed on my fitted, button-up shirt. Pulling my long hair out of the back, the bulk of it still damp, I rolled my eyes at the heat in his expression while he continued to stare at my covered-up chest. Men.
Clearing my throat finally brought his eyesight up. Locking gazes with me, he smiled devilishly. "Well now I'm turned on and you can't go. You're just going to have to stay here with me today."
Laughing, I leaned over the bed to kiss him. He seemed to think that was a green light and grabbed my body, pulling me on top of him. Giggling in his mouth while we softly moved against the other, I was grateful that his mood had improved from the conversation earlier this morning. I really didn't like him down about Denny, especially since he had no reason to be. I understood though. I'd hurt him so many times while I'd been with Denny. Both of them really. I had no desire to ever hurt a man again.
As our kiss got more intense, Kellan's body started telling me that he really hadn't been kidding about being in the mood. I reluctantly pulled away from his mouth. "I wish I could stay with you." Frowning, I sulked. "I'm not really looking forward to today."
Sighing, he cupped my cheeks and searched my eyes. "Someday, I'll get you to feel like the confident woman who was prancing around in her underwear last night, all of the time." Running his hand back through my hair, he added. "You are a beautiful, intelligent woman with a boyfriend who adores you. You have nothing to fear...ever."
Smiling, I blushed and looked away. "Easy for you to say, rock star."
Pulling back, I stood and found my comb. Running it through my locks, I watched him laugh and sit up. "I get nervous."
I gave him a very wry smile as I stopped mid-stroke. Yeah, right. Kellan Kyle was never nervous. Not around people. Not about his body or his looks. He oozed confidence in nearly everything he did.
