She looked back up at me, her face desolate. "It's Griffin's..."
Now my face was desolate. "Oh my God, I was afraid you were going to say that..." If there was one person on this earth that should never procreate...it was Griffin. But he had, and now my sister was possibly carrying his seed.
Clutching her arms, I grabbed my bag and pulled her towards the door. "Come on, we have to get you a test."
Surprisingly, she jerked on my arm. She was shaking her head as I looked back at her, her face looking genuinely terrified. "I can't..."
Running my hand down her arm as soothingly as I could, I whispered, "You have to know, Anna. Either way, you have to know."
She still looked spooked, but she didn't argue with me so I very gently pulled her forward. Feeling like I was trying to break in a wild mare that was going to bolt at any sudden movement or sharp sound, I finally got the freaked-out Anna into Kellan's car.
But when I turned the ignition, she opened the door and bolted. Twisting my lips at her through the window, I shook my head. "Get back in the car, Anna."
She slammed the door shut and shook her head. "You do it, I'll wait upstairs." Sighing at her reluctance to face the facts before her, I nodded and backed the car out of the lot. Hopefully, she'd still be home when I got back. Anna could avoid responsibility with the best of them. I had no idea what she'd do if the stick turned blue.
At the drugstore, I picked up one of each kind of test, and two of the kind that detected pregnancies early. If she'd gotten pregnant from Griffin, then it had to have happened in Boise, and that had been just a few weeks ago. It seemed too early to me for her to test positive, but then, I wasn't an expert on the subject. I'd leave that up to EPT.
Wishing my sister had been here to buy these, wishing the person at the register was a girl tonight and not a twenty-something guy, I set down my basket full of pregnancy tests, muttering, "They're for my sister..."
The man smirked at me, but said nothing. I was sure he thought I was lying. I oddly felt like covering up, even though I was already wearing a thick jacket. I don't know, but buying pregnancy tests was sort of like buying condoms. It was a flashing neon sign hovering above you that screamed-I'm hav**g s*x! Well, I supposed the tests screamed-I had sex!
I hoped I didn't run into anyone I knew...
Luckily, I didn't, and I got out of there with bright red cheeks and most of my pride intact. When I got back to the apartment, my sister was still there. In fact, she was huddled on the couch under a blanket, shaking like she'd just watched a horror movie. Sighing at her, I handed her the paper bag. She wouldn't take it. Instead, she dropped her head in her hands and started crying again.
Sinking down to my knees, I put the bag out of sight behind me and brushed her silky hair behind her ears. "Hey, it will be okay, sis." In what I thought was a hopeful voice I added, "I mean, you're probably not pregnant. Don't you use the pill?" I'd used it diligently ever since Denny and I had started getting serious. I just assumed Anna did the same.
She looked up at me, her face forlorn. "Most days..."
I bit my lip to contain the rant I wanted to give her. You can't go around and sow your wild oats so carelessly. But, she was freaking out, and the last thing she needed was a lecture from me. Smiling instead, I patted her leg. "Do you want me to help you?"
Rolling her eyes, she glared over at the bag I was hiding with my body. "No, thank you. I can pee all by myself."
Sighing, I watched as she stood up, grabbed the bag, and stormed out of the room. I tried to imagine the free-spirited vixen pregnant...but I couldn't.
She came out of the bathroom a couple of minutes later, holding five sticks in one hand. She stared at them, horrified, like they were going to start calling her Mommy at any moment. "Okay, now what?"
Walking up to her, I eyed the freshly wet sticks...they were blank. "Well, I think you have to wait a few minutes, Anna."
She looked up at me, color in her cheeks. "I have to wait? I have to sit here and wait to see if my life is over or not?"
"Anna, your life doesn't have to be over if you are preg-"
She put her finger up to my mouth, silencing me. "Don't say the p-word. It's bad luck." I rolled my eyes at her, hoping she'd washed that finger, but I didn't comment on her ridiculous superstition.
Running her hand through her hair, Anna continued to stare at the sticks in her other palm. "I need a drink," she muttered.
She started to twist her body, like she was headed to the kitchen. I grabbed her arm. "Anna, you can't drink, not if you're preg-" She glared at me nearly saying the dreaded word again and I quickly changed it to, "not if you're with child."
I smiled at my turn-of-phrase, Anna frowned. "Damn it! This sucks already."
Forcefully taking the sticks from her, I made her sit on the couch, away from them. Her eyes watched the various tests in my hand. I almost felt like I could wave her into a trance with them, like a snake charmer at a circus. I wished I could, since every ten seconds she asked, "Anything?"
Glancing every time, I responded with, "No, be patient."
Around the tenth time she asked and I glanced, I noticed something. When I didn't answer her immediately, Anna stood up. I held her back with a hand, trying to remember if, on this particular brand, two dashes was a good thing...because I was definitely seeing two.
"What? What's the verdict?" she asked, agitated as she grabbed my hand keeping her back.
"I don't know yet, Anna."
Narrowing my eyes, hoping that I was remembering the directions wrong, I looked for the one that used plain English to spell out your fate. As the words blossomed to life right in front of my eyes, I nearly felt like crying.
My sister was nearly frantic with worry when I looked up at her. In the loudest voice I could muster, I whispered, "You're pregnant...they're positive."
Her eyes widened and glossed over. Dropping my arm, she quietly asked, "All of them?" like somehow if just one said no, it would negate the rest.
I glanced at them again, then up to her. All of the ones without words were similar-two dashes, a dash and a plus sign, one even had a smiley face. Adding that to the one that joyfully pronounced PREGNANT and it could only mean one thing.
I nodded and gave her a sad smile. "All of them. Congratulations, Anna, you're gonna have a baby."
She started sobbing...and not because she was happy.
When Anna gathered herself, she seemed convinced that she could change the outcome of technology. "No!" Grabbing the sticks, she started marching her way to the bathroom. On the way, she screamed, "No f**king way! These are wrong. I am NOT pregnant!"
I gingerly followed behind the angry-at-fate woman, trying to help her without getting my head torn off. After she slammed the bathroom door shut, I timidly knocked on it. "Anna? What are you doing?"
Her voice trembling with fear and rage, she yelled, "I'm taking the rest of them! Because they're wrong! There's no way that f**ker knocked me up! None!"
I sighed, not wanting to tell her that it was possible. Griffin may be an idiot, but his sperm could still swim...apparently. Very quietly, I asked, "Are you sure it was Griffin?"
I cringed after I asked, knowing the temperamental woman would probably throttle me for kind of calling her a slut for a second time. The door cracked open and twin emerald eyes blazed at me. "Yes...I'm...sure."
She slammed the door shut again and I winced. "Okay, just checking..."
When it was silent for a long time, I slowly opened the door. Anna had every test lined around the small sink. They were all various colors and styles, and the results screens showed various forms of words or symbols, but the results were the same on every single one of them.
Confirmed by a dozen different tests...Anna was pregnant.
She looked back up at me, teary eyed, her anger sapped. "What do I do, Kiera?"
I stepped into the room and hugged the lost woman. She seemed completely thrown, and I'd never seen my sister thrown. She tended to roll with whatever life gave her, breezing from place to place, man to man, job to job. A child though...that was a permanent responsibility that she couldn't flit away from.
"You'll do the best you can, Anna, and I'll help you as much as I can."
I pulled back to look at her and she broke away from me, taking a step back in the small room. Shaking her head, she sputtered, "No, I can't do this, Kiera. I'm not you. I'm not responsible or reliable or even that smart." She tossed her hands up in the air. "I work at Hooters for fuck's sake. All I have is nice hair and a great rack. What the hell do I have to offer a kid?"
Sighing, I put my hand on her arm. "You'll do better than you think, and I know you, you'll love that baby...so much. And what more does a baby need, but love?"
Tears down her cheeks, she shook her head again. "I can't do this...I don't want to. I don't want kids, I've never wanted kids." She ran her hands back through her hair, groaning. "Oh my God...Dad! He's going to kill me. Mom...she'll never look at me the same..."
Sniffling, she covered her face for a second and I patted her arm. "They'll...come around, Anna. They'll be proud grandparents, and you and Griffin-"
She dropped her hands, her jaw dropping. "Griffin...oh my God. Griffin is going to be a father!" She said it like she just now realized what his role in all of this was going to be.
I rubbed her arm supportively. "Yeah, that's kind of how it works, Anna."
Shaking her head, her face still in disbelief, she said, "Griffin can't be a dad, Kiera. He just can't." She pointed out the bathroom window, to where our boys were miles and miles away from us. "He blows pot into puppy's faces, Kiera! Can you picture him around a child?"
I cringed. Nope, not in a million years. I tried to switch it to a placating smile, but Anna noticed my expression. In some attempt to reassure her, I said, "Well, you'll have me and Kellan and Evan, and Matt especially, since he's family. They'll...keep Griffin in check."
Sighing, she closed the toilet seat and sat on it. "Griffin...he'll think I did this on purpose, like those groupies they were warned about." She looked up at me, fresh tears in her eyes. "He'll never want to be with me again."
Tears in my own eyes, I shook my head. "Anna, he won't..." I closed my mouth. No, Anna was right. It's exactly what he would think. Shaking my head, I shrugged. "I'm sorry."
I swallowed back the tears threatening to spill over as sympathy washed through me. Whatever was between her and Griffin, it was clear that Anna genuinely did like him, maybe love him even. I wasn't sure, but I knew it was over now, and I knew how much an ending relationship hurt.
Watching my struggling emotions, Anna suddenly stood up. "I'm gonna be sick..." I moved to hug her, thinking her pain was emotional, but she held one hand out to me and one to her mouth. "No, I'm really gonna be sick."
Turning around, she quickly opened the toilet lid and proceeded to throw up in it. Holding her hair back, I rubbed her shoulder while she rested her head on her arm. She sniffled a few times, breathing heavier, then her anger seemed to resurface.
Now my face was desolate. "Oh my God, I was afraid you were going to say that..." If there was one person on this earth that should never procreate...it was Griffin. But he had, and now my sister was possibly carrying his seed.
Clutching her arms, I grabbed my bag and pulled her towards the door. "Come on, we have to get you a test."
Surprisingly, she jerked on my arm. She was shaking her head as I looked back at her, her face looking genuinely terrified. "I can't..."
Running my hand down her arm as soothingly as I could, I whispered, "You have to know, Anna. Either way, you have to know."
She still looked spooked, but she didn't argue with me so I very gently pulled her forward. Feeling like I was trying to break in a wild mare that was going to bolt at any sudden movement or sharp sound, I finally got the freaked-out Anna into Kellan's car.
But when I turned the ignition, she opened the door and bolted. Twisting my lips at her through the window, I shook my head. "Get back in the car, Anna."
She slammed the door shut and shook her head. "You do it, I'll wait upstairs." Sighing at her reluctance to face the facts before her, I nodded and backed the car out of the lot. Hopefully, she'd still be home when I got back. Anna could avoid responsibility with the best of them. I had no idea what she'd do if the stick turned blue.
At the drugstore, I picked up one of each kind of test, and two of the kind that detected pregnancies early. If she'd gotten pregnant from Griffin, then it had to have happened in Boise, and that had been just a few weeks ago. It seemed too early to me for her to test positive, but then, I wasn't an expert on the subject. I'd leave that up to EPT.
Wishing my sister had been here to buy these, wishing the person at the register was a girl tonight and not a twenty-something guy, I set down my basket full of pregnancy tests, muttering, "They're for my sister..."
The man smirked at me, but said nothing. I was sure he thought I was lying. I oddly felt like covering up, even though I was already wearing a thick jacket. I don't know, but buying pregnancy tests was sort of like buying condoms. It was a flashing neon sign hovering above you that screamed-I'm hav**g s*x! Well, I supposed the tests screamed-I had sex!
I hoped I didn't run into anyone I knew...
Luckily, I didn't, and I got out of there with bright red cheeks and most of my pride intact. When I got back to the apartment, my sister was still there. In fact, she was huddled on the couch under a blanket, shaking like she'd just watched a horror movie. Sighing at her, I handed her the paper bag. She wouldn't take it. Instead, she dropped her head in her hands and started crying again.
Sinking down to my knees, I put the bag out of sight behind me and brushed her silky hair behind her ears. "Hey, it will be okay, sis." In what I thought was a hopeful voice I added, "I mean, you're probably not pregnant. Don't you use the pill?" I'd used it diligently ever since Denny and I had started getting serious. I just assumed Anna did the same.
She looked up at me, her face forlorn. "Most days..."
I bit my lip to contain the rant I wanted to give her. You can't go around and sow your wild oats so carelessly. But, she was freaking out, and the last thing she needed was a lecture from me. Smiling instead, I patted her leg. "Do you want me to help you?"
Rolling her eyes, she glared over at the bag I was hiding with my body. "No, thank you. I can pee all by myself."
Sighing, I watched as she stood up, grabbed the bag, and stormed out of the room. I tried to imagine the free-spirited vixen pregnant...but I couldn't.
She came out of the bathroom a couple of minutes later, holding five sticks in one hand. She stared at them, horrified, like they were going to start calling her Mommy at any moment. "Okay, now what?"
Walking up to her, I eyed the freshly wet sticks...they were blank. "Well, I think you have to wait a few minutes, Anna."
She looked up at me, color in her cheeks. "I have to wait? I have to sit here and wait to see if my life is over or not?"
"Anna, your life doesn't have to be over if you are preg-"
She put her finger up to my mouth, silencing me. "Don't say the p-word. It's bad luck." I rolled my eyes at her, hoping she'd washed that finger, but I didn't comment on her ridiculous superstition.
Running her hand through her hair, Anna continued to stare at the sticks in her other palm. "I need a drink," she muttered.
She started to twist her body, like she was headed to the kitchen. I grabbed her arm. "Anna, you can't drink, not if you're preg-" She glared at me nearly saying the dreaded word again and I quickly changed it to, "not if you're with child."
I smiled at my turn-of-phrase, Anna frowned. "Damn it! This sucks already."
Forcefully taking the sticks from her, I made her sit on the couch, away from them. Her eyes watched the various tests in my hand. I almost felt like I could wave her into a trance with them, like a snake charmer at a circus. I wished I could, since every ten seconds she asked, "Anything?"
Glancing every time, I responded with, "No, be patient."
Around the tenth time she asked and I glanced, I noticed something. When I didn't answer her immediately, Anna stood up. I held her back with a hand, trying to remember if, on this particular brand, two dashes was a good thing...because I was definitely seeing two.
"What? What's the verdict?" she asked, agitated as she grabbed my hand keeping her back.
"I don't know yet, Anna."
Narrowing my eyes, hoping that I was remembering the directions wrong, I looked for the one that used plain English to spell out your fate. As the words blossomed to life right in front of my eyes, I nearly felt like crying.
My sister was nearly frantic with worry when I looked up at her. In the loudest voice I could muster, I whispered, "You're pregnant...they're positive."
Her eyes widened and glossed over. Dropping my arm, she quietly asked, "All of them?" like somehow if just one said no, it would negate the rest.
I glanced at them again, then up to her. All of the ones without words were similar-two dashes, a dash and a plus sign, one even had a smiley face. Adding that to the one that joyfully pronounced PREGNANT and it could only mean one thing.
I nodded and gave her a sad smile. "All of them. Congratulations, Anna, you're gonna have a baby."
She started sobbing...and not because she was happy.
When Anna gathered herself, she seemed convinced that she could change the outcome of technology. "No!" Grabbing the sticks, she started marching her way to the bathroom. On the way, she screamed, "No f**king way! These are wrong. I am NOT pregnant!"
I gingerly followed behind the angry-at-fate woman, trying to help her without getting my head torn off. After she slammed the bathroom door shut, I timidly knocked on it. "Anna? What are you doing?"
Her voice trembling with fear and rage, she yelled, "I'm taking the rest of them! Because they're wrong! There's no way that f**ker knocked me up! None!"
I sighed, not wanting to tell her that it was possible. Griffin may be an idiot, but his sperm could still swim...apparently. Very quietly, I asked, "Are you sure it was Griffin?"
I cringed after I asked, knowing the temperamental woman would probably throttle me for kind of calling her a slut for a second time. The door cracked open and twin emerald eyes blazed at me. "Yes...I'm...sure."
She slammed the door shut again and I winced. "Okay, just checking..."
When it was silent for a long time, I slowly opened the door. Anna had every test lined around the small sink. They were all various colors and styles, and the results screens showed various forms of words or symbols, but the results were the same on every single one of them.
Confirmed by a dozen different tests...Anna was pregnant.
She looked back up at me, teary eyed, her anger sapped. "What do I do, Kiera?"
I stepped into the room and hugged the lost woman. She seemed completely thrown, and I'd never seen my sister thrown. She tended to roll with whatever life gave her, breezing from place to place, man to man, job to job. A child though...that was a permanent responsibility that she couldn't flit away from.
"You'll do the best you can, Anna, and I'll help you as much as I can."
I pulled back to look at her and she broke away from me, taking a step back in the small room. Shaking her head, she sputtered, "No, I can't do this, Kiera. I'm not you. I'm not responsible or reliable or even that smart." She tossed her hands up in the air. "I work at Hooters for fuck's sake. All I have is nice hair and a great rack. What the hell do I have to offer a kid?"
Sighing, I put my hand on her arm. "You'll do better than you think, and I know you, you'll love that baby...so much. And what more does a baby need, but love?"
Tears down her cheeks, she shook her head again. "I can't do this...I don't want to. I don't want kids, I've never wanted kids." She ran her hands back through her hair, groaning. "Oh my God...Dad! He's going to kill me. Mom...she'll never look at me the same..."
Sniffling, she covered her face for a second and I patted her arm. "They'll...come around, Anna. They'll be proud grandparents, and you and Griffin-"
She dropped her hands, her jaw dropping. "Griffin...oh my God. Griffin is going to be a father!" She said it like she just now realized what his role in all of this was going to be.
I rubbed her arm supportively. "Yeah, that's kind of how it works, Anna."
Shaking her head, her face still in disbelief, she said, "Griffin can't be a dad, Kiera. He just can't." She pointed out the bathroom window, to where our boys were miles and miles away from us. "He blows pot into puppy's faces, Kiera! Can you picture him around a child?"
I cringed. Nope, not in a million years. I tried to switch it to a placating smile, but Anna noticed my expression. In some attempt to reassure her, I said, "Well, you'll have me and Kellan and Evan, and Matt especially, since he's family. They'll...keep Griffin in check."
Sighing, she closed the toilet seat and sat on it. "Griffin...he'll think I did this on purpose, like those groupies they were warned about." She looked up at me, fresh tears in her eyes. "He'll never want to be with me again."
Tears in my own eyes, I shook my head. "Anna, he won't..." I closed my mouth. No, Anna was right. It's exactly what he would think. Shaking my head, I shrugged. "I'm sorry."
I swallowed back the tears threatening to spill over as sympathy washed through me. Whatever was between her and Griffin, it was clear that Anna genuinely did like him, maybe love him even. I wasn't sure, but I knew it was over now, and I knew how much an ending relationship hurt.
Watching my struggling emotions, Anna suddenly stood up. "I'm gonna be sick..." I moved to hug her, thinking her pain was emotional, but she held one hand out to me and one to her mouth. "No, I'm really gonna be sick."
Turning around, she quickly opened the toilet lid and proceeded to throw up in it. Holding her hair back, I rubbed her shoulder while she rested her head on her arm. She sniffled a few times, breathing heavier, then her anger seemed to resurface.
