Everwild
Page 15

 Neal Shusterman

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"If the McGill was your cousin," Mikey said, "I can guarantee he'd disown you."
Allie reached over and secretly squeezed Mikey's hand, leaving him to wonder what the squeeze meant. Was it a show of affection, or was she trying to tell him he was revealing too much information?
"Now it's your turn," said Allie, changing the subject. "Tell us about Jackin' Jill."
Clearly this was a sore spot with the other skinjackers, because they all looked away. Finally Milos spoke up.
"She and I were very close," he said.
"How close?" Mikey asked, realizing Milos had a nice wound worthy of being prodded and poked.
"Close," was the only answer he gave. "We traveled together, doing jobs for other Afterlights, in exchange for crossed objects."
"Jobs?" asked Allie. "What kinds of jobs?"
"Jobs that could only be accomplished by skinjackers," Milos said. "We would tell family members that their loved one in Everlost was all right. We would pass on some information that they otherwise would have taken to the grave. We would finish their unfinished business in the living world."
"Yeah, yeah," said Squirrel. "There was one kid who was obsessed with finishing his model airplane. So Moose and I skinjacked a couple of neighbor kids and finished it for him."
"And don't forget the time we got hired by that kid in Philly to beat up the fleshie that got him killed." Milos sighed. "Some tasks were more appropriate for Moose and Squirrel than others."
"Impressive," said Mikey, in spite of himself. The idea of using skinjacking as a profitable skill tickled Mikey where he lived.
"Yeah, yeah--we were very impressive--and we were rich, too," said Squirrel.
Milos nodded. "By Everlost standards. We had quite a collection of crossed objects--and these were not just ordinary items. We had gold and diamonds--our customers would trade us their prized possessions in return for what we could offer. We even had a Porsche."
"No way!" said Allie.
"It's true, it's true," said Squirrel, "but it was a pain in the neck, 'cause it could only drive on roads that don't exist no more."
"Jill would be the one to pass on messages to the living. She was best at convincing the living that the message was real." Milos looked off, caught in the memory. "Then, one day we woke up, and Jill was gone, along with the car and all of our finest things--and she even stole things from the vapor of Afterlights that had taken us in. There were many, and they were all furious."
"Yeah, yeah--they thought we had done it. We had to skinjack our way to safety. Lucky there were some fleshies around."
"Jackin' Jill took everything worth taking," said Moose. "Everything! But we're gonna find her. And when we do ..."He smashed his fist into his palm.
"I'm sorry," Allie said to Milos, with a level of compassion that made Mikey sick. "Serves them right!" Mikey said. "It's what you get for being greedy."
Allie threw him a disapproving glare. "You of all people shouldn't talk about greed!"
When she turned her eyes back to Milos they were all sympathetic again, and Mikey just couldn't stand it. He stood up and strode away.
"Where are you going?" Allie asked.
"I don't know," he said. "Maybe I'll catch up with Jackin' Jill."
Allie started after Mikey, but snared herself on a barbed wire fence that, for reasons unknown, had crossed into Everlost. A sharp steel barb tore a deep gash on her arm that felt momentarily weird before it zipped itself closed. By the time she looked up, Mikey was gone.
"Let him go," said Milos, coming up behind her. "Clearly he has ... what is that expression?'Skeletons in his closet.' "
"Yeah, and bats in his belfry," Allie said.
Milos looked at her, puzzled. "This expression I do not know."
"Never mind," she said, not wanting to get into it. Mikey's temper tantrums had gotten fewer and further between, but they never went away completely. His moodiness always surfaced in the company of other Afterlights. Social skills were never his strong point. As for "skeletons in his closet," that implied he had secrets Allie didn't know-- but she knew all his secrets, didn't she?
"Whatever bee he's got in his bonnet, he'll get over it," Allie said. Milos smiled. "Bats in belfries, bees in bonnets--this is why I love English."
Allie turned to return to their campsite on the highway, but then Milos said something that stopped her.
"You know ... I could teach you things."
She slowly turned back to him. "What do you mean?"
Milos sauntered closer to her, hands in his pockets. "If you came skinjacking with us, there are many things I could teach you. Skinjacking is more than just climbing inside fleshies and putting them to sleep."
"If you're talking about your little business of delivering messages to the living, no thank you. I don't want to be a part of ... of DeadEx."
"This is not what I mean," said Milos, his voice brimming with hushed excitement. "I am talking about the joy of it!"
Allie immediately thought to the time she had gone out into the rain. She understood the joy he was talking about, but it was always overshadowed by the guilt she felt stealing moments that weren't hers.
"Have you never dreamed of being someone else?" Milos asked. "Someone rich, or beautiful, or powerful. Have you never longed, if only for a few minutes, to live someone else's life?"
"Of course I have... ."
"And yet you do not do it? Why is this?"
"Because it's wrong!"
"Who told you it was wrong? Was it Mikey?"
"No!" said Allie. "I don't need him to tell me the difference between right and wrong."
Milos took a long look at Allie. "Skinjackers are not like other Afterlights, Allie, and we all must learn to accept this. Because not only are we given this power, but also a powerful hunger to use it."
"A hunger that we should resist!" insisted Allie.
"Resist our nature? Do you not think that would be wrong?"
Allie found that Milos was standing just a bit too close, and she took a step back. He was making far too much sense, and it troubled her. She had wanted another skinjacker to talk to--someone who could understand the things she felt. She thought it would be a case of misery-loves-company. She never expected to find a skinjacker who reveled in possessing the living, turning it into an art form. A way of life. What if he was right, and resisting that powerful pull to flesh was the wrong thing for her to do?
"Flesh and bone deserves to be appreciated," Milos said. "Those who have it take it for granted, but not us! We appreciate every breath, every breeze, every beat of the heart. And so, by borrowing their flesh, we are the ones who give their bodies the dignity they have lost."
All the reservations that held Allie back--that slapped her down every time she skinjacked--were beginning to feel insignificant, and she was torn. If skinjacking truly was her nature, shouldn't she embrace it?
"Please," said Milos, "let me teach you. Let me show you some of the things I know. I promise you will not be disappointed!"
Allie shook her head, then nodded, but then shook her head again. Finally she settled on telling him, "I'll think about it." Then she turned and hurried back to the others, for once glad to be in the company of Moose and Squirrel.
It was hard for Afterlights to hide at night. Their afterglow always gave them away. Mikey just wanted some time alone, to brood, maybe sit on a rock, look at the moon, and let all those unpleasant feelings work themselves out, if indeed they ever would. The problem was, the only rock large enough to sit on was living-world, and Mikey had to continually pull himself up out from it. It was annoying.
Then, the last person he wanted to see emerged through a tree trunk, easily finding him by his glow. Mikey wasn't sure whether to stare Milos down or just ignore him. So he did one, then the other.
"Allie is worried about you," Milos said.
"I really don't care," grumbled Mikey.
"This does not surprise me."
"Why is it your business anyway?" Mikey snapped. When Milos had no response to that, Mikey said, "Tell her I'm fine, and I'll come back when I feel like it."
Milos lifted his feet to keep himself from sinking, but didn't leave. He just regarded Mikey with a detached kind of curiosity.
"Why do you hold her back?" Milos asked.
"Excuse me?"
Milos took a step closer. "She could go so much further. She could be so much more. But you--you keep her from using her skills. You are very much an anchor around her neck. This is very selfish." Mikey came off of his rock to face him. "You don't know what you're talking about!"
But Milos remained calm, and sure of himself. "Is it my words that anger you," he asked, "or is it because you know I speak the truth?"
If there was any hope that Mikey might warm to Milos-- maybe even become a reluctant friend, that hope was now gone. "Allie and I ... Allie and I care for each other. We've been through a lot together--you have no idea!"
"You are right," said Milos, "but I do know that she bears a certain sadness. You must see it."
Yes, of course Mikey had seen it, but he wasn't about to admit it to this skinjacking outsider. "Like I said, you don't know anything."
"You claim to care for her, but I do not see this. If you cared for her, perhaps you would see that your destinies now lie on different paths."
"Do not anger me!" Mikey roared. "I am not to be trifled with!"And he heard in his own voice a roughness and a rawness he hadn't heard in a long time. Overtones of the McGill.
Milos put his hands up in surrender, as if he were backing down--but Mikey knew this was just another calculated move. "Then pardon me." Milos said, "I meant no disrespect."
"You say that a lot," Mikey pointed out, looking him right in those weirdly distracting speckled eyes. "But I think disrespect is exactly what you mean."
"I am only thinking of what is best for Allie," said Milos with a gaze that penetrated uncomfortably deep. "Are you?"
Then he left Mikey alone with his rock, his thoughts, and the moon. * * *
The next day, they came to the town of Lebanon, Tennessee, and again Milos asked Allie if she wanted to come skinjacking with him. She broached the topic as gently as she could with Mikey.
"There are things he can teach me about skinjacking," Allie told him. "Things that could probably help us."
"Why are you telling me?" Mikey snapped. "If you want to go, then go. Why should I care?"
"I'd feel much better about it if you weren't acting so childish."
"Maybe I don't want you to feel better about it."
Allie clenched her fists and growled in frustration. "I swear, Mikey, sometimes ..."
"Sometimes what? Sometimes you wonder why you put up with me?"
Allie took a moment to calm herself down. "I know why I put up with you. What I don't understand is why you don't trust me."