Falling Fast
Page 38

Dropping my forehead to my arm resting over the bedrail, I start to cry. It takes a long time for me to get myself under control, and when I finally do, Grandma’s eyes are closed. I pull in one more shaky breath as I stand and lean over the bedrail, pressing a kiss to her wrinkled cheek. “I’ll be back tomorrow. I love you.” Her fingers tighten around mine as I speak, and I pretend she knows who I am and that she’s saying “I love you, too” before I let her go.
Pulling up in front of the Rusty Rose thirty minutes later, I put my Jeep in park then get out. I called Colton as soon as I left the nursing home and told him what happened. Before I even got done speaking, he told me he was going to come home. I reminded him that he couldn’t leave; it’s Saturday, and everyone works Saturday, including his parents. That’s when he told me to get my ass to him so he could see for himself that I was okay. His reaction isn’t a surprise. He’s been worried about me. He doesn’t have to say it, but I can see it in his eyes whenever we talk about my grandmother.
I open the door to the bar and am greeted by the sound of people having a good time and loud music. It’s not a surprise the place is packed. Since the weather started to warm up, it’s always packed. Making my way through the people gathered here and there, I head toward the bar, and the minute I spot Colton, his eyes lock with mine and fill with worry. Taking my hand once I’m close, he pulls me with him into the office then closes the door behind us.
“You’ve been crying,” he accuses once he’s turned around to face me.
“I’m okay,” I tell him, and he shakes his head, pulling me into his chest, wrapping one arm around my back and the other around my skull.
I circle my arms around him, fighting back a fresh wave of tears. “Fuck, I shouldn’t have let you drive like you are. I didn’t even fucking think.”
“I’m okay,” I repeat as I tip my head back to look up at him, and his hand slides to wrap around the side of my neck, making me wince.
“Jesus.” He tips my head back farther and his eyes zero in on the three claw marks on my neck. “She did that to you?”
“She didn’t do it on purpose,” I defend, and his face softens.
“I know that, baby,” he replies gently. “From now on, I’m going with you when you go to visit her.”
“That’s not necessary.”
“From now on, I’m going with you,” he repeats roughly, and I don’t argue, because I know that tone and understand it would be pointless. “I’m so sorry.”
“Me too.” I drop my forehead to his chest. “I hate that she’s suffering. I mean, I know she’s not in pain, but still, what she’s going through seems worse,” I say, and he doesn’t agree or disagree; he just holds me. I need him to hold me. I feel safest when I’m in his arms, safest when I’m with him. “I should let you get back to work,” I sigh after a few minutes, and his hold tightens.
“You should let me hold you,” he corrects, kissing the top of my head. So I do. I let him hold me for a long time before he uses his fingers on my chin to tip my head back toward him. “I’ll drive you home.”
“You need to work.”
“I can leave to drive you home,” he says, sounding agitated, and I look up at him, seeing that same aggravation in his eyes.
“I have my Jeep.”
“Your Jeep will be fine here for the night. I’ll drive you back here in the morning.”
“Are you sure?”
“I’m sure,” he answers, running his fingers along my cheek. “Let me tell Dad that I’m leaving.”
“Sure.” I nod and he kisses me softly then lets me go to open the door.
Following him out into the bar, I watch him go to his dad and as he speaks, Kirk’s eyes find mine and his face softens. Clapping Colton on the shoulder, Kirk makes his way toward me then wraps his bulky arm around my shoulders.
“You gonna be okay, honey?” he asks, tipping his head down toward mine, and my chest gets warm. I’ve not only fallen for Colton, but also for his family.
“I’ll be okay,” I assure him, and I will be. Having Colton, his family, and Nat, I know I will always be okay.
“Do you want a drink?”
“I’ll wait until I’m home to have a glass of wine.”
I smile up at him and he smiles back then he kisses the side of my head before he lets me go, saying, “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“See you tomorrow,” I agree, taking Colton’s hand when he holds it out to me. Grabbing his jacket, he leads me out the back door of the bar then over to his bike. I totally forgot he rode his bike to work today.
“I—” I start to tell him that he should use my Jeep, but before I can do that, he puts his helmet on my head and snaps it in place. “You need a helmet,” I point out, and he goes over to the bike parked next to his and takes the helmet off the seat.
“I’ll borrow Dad’s,” he explains, putting on his dad’s helmet that’s the same black as his, and then he helps me into his leather jacket that smells like him. I watch him get on the bike then he holds out his hand to me.
“I don’t know what I’m doing,” I tell him, and he smiles.
“It’s easy, baby. Just toss your leg over then hang onto me.”
“I’m—” As I begin to tell him that I’m not sure about this, he doesn’t let me. He grabs my hand and pulls me toward him.
“Leg over,” he instructs, so I do. I toss my leg over the seat behind him then wrap my arms around his waist as tightly as I can. “Loosen up a little, Dimples. Promise you’re going to love this.”
“I don’t know about that,” I mumble, and he ignores me as he starts the engine, bringing the bike to life. Holding onto him, I squeak as he pulls off, but then feel my body relax as he drives us onto the road. Even with the cool night air whipping against my skin, I start to overheat. His body between my thighs and the bike vibrating under us, is like nothing I have ever felt before. Unfortunately, as quickly as the ride begins, he’s pulling up in front of the house and cutting the engine.
“What’d you think?” he asks, turning his head to look at me over his shoulder.
“I want to do it again,” I breathe, and he smirks, obviously reading the look in my eyes.
“Tomorrow. Then whenever you want after that.”
“Good,” I say quietly as I slide off the seat behind him. Helping me take off my helmet, he attaches it to the back of the seat then takes off his own. He gets off the bike so he can walk me to the door, with Loki following us.
“If you need me, call the bar,” he instructs once we’re at the door, and I nod then tip my head back to accept a kiss. Once he’s touched his mouth to mine, he pulls back and his eyes scan my face. “You gonna be okay?”
“I’ll be okay.”
“Call me before you go to sleep.”
“I’ll call,” I promise, resting my hands to his chest when I see he’s torn about leaving me. “Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine. I’m going to go through some more of Grandma’s stuff and work on the blankets for the girls, so I’ll be busy.”
“All right.” He presses his mouth to mine then his tongue to my bottom lip before he releases me and opens the door for me. Stepping inside, Loki follows me in then sits at my feet. “Lock up,” Colton demands, and I roll my eyes as I shut the door and lock it. Moving to the window in the living room, I watch him head down to his bike, put on his helmet, then back up, and take off.
Once he’s out of sight, I head for the kitchen and pour myself a glass of wine then carry that with me into the garage. Opening up one box after another, I sort things into a pile I started for donations, and another pile I have to keep. As I reach the last box from Grandma’s room, I open it up and find a beautiful wooden box with butterflies carved into the surface. Taking the box out, I flip the brass latch and open the lid. I find dozens of letters in sealed envelopes all addressed to me, with ‘Return To Sender’ written on them in Colleen’s handwriting. I take a seat on the floor, and Loki comes and lies down next to me.