Falling for Rachel
Page 44

She knew very well what he was thinking of, and she’d put off dealing with it long enough. “Rio—” she set the plate aside “—I need to talk to Nick for a minute. Can you handle things without him if we go upstairs?”
“No problem. He just wash twice as fast when he come back.”
She would be calm, Rachel promised herself as they started upstairs. She would be logical, and she would be in control. “Okay, Nick,” she said the minute they stepped into the apartment. And that was all she said, because she found herself being thoroughly kissed. “Stop.” Her voice was muffled, but it was firm, and the hands she shoved against his shoulders did the rest.
“I’ve missed you, that’s all.” He gentled his grip, then released her completely when she stepped back. “It’s been a long time since we had a chance to be alone.”
Pressing her hands to her temples, she sighed. “Oh, Nick. I’ve made a mess of this.” The confused churning of emotion was clear in her eyes as she stared at him. “I kept telling myself it would resolve itself, even though I knew it wouldn’t.” In a gesture that mirrored the helplessness she was feeling, she let her hands drop to her sides. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
There was a quick warning twist in his gut. People only said that stuff about not hurting you in that particular tone of voice when they were about to. “What are you talking about?”
“About you and me—about you thinking there’s a you and me.” She turned away, hoping she could find the right words. “I tried to explain it to you before, but I did a poor job of it. You see, initially I was so surprised that you would think of me that way. I didn’t—” With a sound of disgust, she turned to face him again. “I’m not handling it any better now.”
“Why don’t you just say what you mean?”
“I care about you, not only as my client, but as a person.”
That all-too-familiar light came into his eyes. “I care about you, too.”
When he took a step toward her, she lifted her hands, palms out. “But not that way, Nick. Not…romantically.”
His eyes narrowed, and she watched, hurting, as he absorbed the rejection. “You’re not interested in me.”
“I am interested in you, but not the way you think you’d like me to be.”
“I get the picture.” Trying to tough it out, he hooked his thumbs in his front pockets. “You think I’m too young.”
She thought about the way she’d just been kissed, and let out a long breath. “That argument doesn’t seem altogether valid. It should, but you’re not a typical teenager.”
“So what is it? I’m just not your type?”
When she thought of how much he and Zack had in common, she had to block a quick laugh. “That doesn’t work either.” Sorry that she was going to hurt him, knowing she had to, Rachel did her best with the truth. “What I feel for you is the same sort of thing I feel for my brothers. I’m sorry it’s not what you want, Nick, but it’s all I can give.” She wanted to reach out, touch his arm, but she was afraid he’d shrug her off. “I’m sorry, too, that I didn’t put it just that way weeks ago. I didn’t seem to know how.”
“I feel like an idiot.”
“Don’t.” She couldn’t keep herself from reaching out now, taking his hand in hers. “There’s nothing for you to feel like an idiot about. You were attracted, and you were honest about it. And underneath all my confusion and dismay,” she added, trying out a smile, “I was very flattered.”
“I’d rather you said you were tempted.”
“Maybe.” Her smile warmed, squeezing his battered heart. “For a moment. I hope it doesn’t hurt you to have me say it, but I do want to be your friend.”
“Well, you gave it to me straight.” And he supposed he would have to accept it. A babe was just a babe, he tried to tell himself. But he knew there was no one else like Rachel. “No hard feelings.”
“Good.” She wanted to kiss him, but figured it was best not to push her luck. Or his. She did take his other hand. “I always wanted a younger brother.”
He wasn’t quite ready to take that position. “Why?”
“For the purest of reasons,” she told him. “To have somebody I could push around.” When he smiled, she felt the first genuine tug of relief. “Come on, get back to work.”
She walked down with him, certain they had progressed to the next stage. To reassure herself, she stayed in the kitchen for a few minutes, pleased when she felt no lingering tension from Nick’s direction.
When she slipped out, she looked immediately for Zack.
“In the office,” Pete told her, grinning. “You should go right on in.”
“Thanks.” She was puzzled by the chuckles that rumbled around the bar, but when she glanced back, everyone looked busy and innocent. Too innocent, Rachel thought as she pushed open Zack’s office door.
He was there all right, big as life, standing in front of his shipshape desk. There was a curvy blonde wrapped around him, clinging like cellophane.
With one brow arched, Rachel took in the scene. The blonde was doing her best to crawl up Zack’s body. She nearly had him pinned to the desk, and Zack was tugging at the arms that roped his neck. The expression on his face, Rachel mused—a kind of baffled embarrassment—was worth the price of admission all by itself.
“Listen, honey, I appreciate the offer. Really. But I’m not—” He broke off when he spotted Rachel.
That expression, she decided, was even better. This one had traces of shock, chagrin and apology, all seasoned with a nice dollop of fear.
“Oh, God.” He managed to pry one arm from around his neck, and he tried to shake her off, but she transferred her grip to his waist.
“Excuse me,” Rachel said, her tongue firmly in her cheek. “I can see you’re busy.”
“Damn it, don’t shut the door.” His eyes widened when the blonde shifted to give his bottom a nice, intimate squeeze. “Give me a break, Rachel.”
“You want a break?” She glanced back to where the regulars had moved closer, craning their necks to catch the show. “He wants a break,” she told them. Very casually, she strolled across the threshold. “Which leg would you like me to break, Muldoon? Or would you prefer an arm? Maybe your neck.”