Falling Under
Page 91
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“My brother needs some major help,” Duke said finally. “He needs a type of program that can deal with the type of problems he has. I think I convinced my parents to support that plan. His doctors and the ones at the hospital in Los Angeles all agree that it’s the best option. My parents are going to get counseling too. Danny’s ex is pretty cool. She’ll help if he makes a commitment to get treatment. He’ll lose everything if he doesn’t.”
“Did you work on anything with your parents?”
“Most of the time I was just around. I did a lot of listening, gathering up all the information I could get so I could understand what was going on. Once I did, and once I was convinced what they were recommending was the best for him, my parents and I were able to talk a lot more. It was difficult and it’s not solved by any means. I don’t know that I’ll ever be as close as the other four are. But it’s okay for me to be whatever kind of close we are.”
“Are you truly?” He heard the challenge in her question. Most people would have let what he’d said about being okay pass. Not this one.
He paused, thinking because it was a smart question and one he’d skirted. “I want that sort of relationship Asa has with his mom. I was wrapped up in this idea that I should want to pick up the phone to share things with them. And them with me, especially the big stuff like rehab. But the longer I was there, the more I realized even if I lived next door, it wouldn’t be like that.”
“It’s not you.” Carmella put her hand on his chest, above his heart.
“Doesn’t matter,” Duke said. “I wasn’t sure even on the plane back up here if this situation with my family was something I could be all right with until you. When you walked into that restaurant tonight, I knew you. I looked into your eyes and I saw to your heart and all the worry and upset dropped away. I thought, Carmella’s here, everything will be okay now.”
And what a revelation that had been. To see her and feel suddenly so very safe and all right. She calmed down all that agitation he’d had in his belly for weeks.
“How are things with Virgie? I’m sorry I haven’t been here to help you through it.” The guilt of that hung heavy in his gut. He’d been torn the entire time he was in LA because he’d known she had to process all the stuff with her mother moving.
“I haven’t spoken to her in a week or so. I’d be lying to say I hadn’t considered just driving over there to see it for myself. I got to Issaquah once. But I stopped and got doughnuts and came back home.”
“She doesn’t deserve how much you care about her.” Virgie and Steven Hay made him livid. “You’re so fucking good and kind and they just shit all over you.”
“Just because I love you doesn’t mean I want to hear this. It is what it is.”
He kissed the top of her head. “I hate it, Carm. You’re over here worrying and she doesn’t even check in?”
“Now it’s my turn to say you should listen to your own very good advice.” She shifted so they lay side by side, hands linked. Ginger hopped up on the bed and looked carefully over the mound of blankets to see if she was going to get busted.
Carmella wore a smile as Duke patted the mattress for Ginger to lie down.
“I know you want to fix things for me because you love me. But you know as well as I do that some things can’t be fixed. I hope she’ll have a happy ending. But I feel like her story will end in tears.”
He heard the emotion in her tone. “I’m sorry. The last thing I want is to upset you.”
She snorted. “Now you’re going to apologize all the time? Neither of us knows how to be with someone like this. So we’ll feel our way along. Fight. Because you’re pushy in a chipper and yet steadfast way and that’s super annoying.”
He laughed. “I missed this most of all.”
“Me telling you how annoying you can be? That’s probably true as most people are too busy fawning over you.”
“You don’t fawn over me?” he teased.
“I ogle you. I don’t have to fawn, though, because you’re mine. But you’re vexing sometimes and I’m going to say something when you are. I’ll blow it off mainly, I’ve come to discover.”
“I do have a superhuman ability to piss you off.”
“You like to rile me up.”
“We all know I’m a danger junkie. You’re so fucking magnificent when you’re mad I can’t help it.”
Carmella sighed. “Tomorrow is a big day, Mr. Bradshaw. Grand opening. Wait until you see the new showroom. It’s gorgeous. You left before they did the last bit of paint and finish work.”
“Everyone has been sending pictures but I’m pretty excited to see it myself tomorrow. I love you. I’m going to say that a lot more now since you’ve finally admitted you love me too.”
“No complaints here. I love you too.”
“Did you work on anything with your parents?”
“Most of the time I was just around. I did a lot of listening, gathering up all the information I could get so I could understand what was going on. Once I did, and once I was convinced what they were recommending was the best for him, my parents and I were able to talk a lot more. It was difficult and it’s not solved by any means. I don’t know that I’ll ever be as close as the other four are. But it’s okay for me to be whatever kind of close we are.”
“Are you truly?” He heard the challenge in her question. Most people would have let what he’d said about being okay pass. Not this one.
He paused, thinking because it was a smart question and one he’d skirted. “I want that sort of relationship Asa has with his mom. I was wrapped up in this idea that I should want to pick up the phone to share things with them. And them with me, especially the big stuff like rehab. But the longer I was there, the more I realized even if I lived next door, it wouldn’t be like that.”
“It’s not you.” Carmella put her hand on his chest, above his heart.
“Doesn’t matter,” Duke said. “I wasn’t sure even on the plane back up here if this situation with my family was something I could be all right with until you. When you walked into that restaurant tonight, I knew you. I looked into your eyes and I saw to your heart and all the worry and upset dropped away. I thought, Carmella’s here, everything will be okay now.”
And what a revelation that had been. To see her and feel suddenly so very safe and all right. She calmed down all that agitation he’d had in his belly for weeks.
“How are things with Virgie? I’m sorry I haven’t been here to help you through it.” The guilt of that hung heavy in his gut. He’d been torn the entire time he was in LA because he’d known she had to process all the stuff with her mother moving.
“I haven’t spoken to her in a week or so. I’d be lying to say I hadn’t considered just driving over there to see it for myself. I got to Issaquah once. But I stopped and got doughnuts and came back home.”
“She doesn’t deserve how much you care about her.” Virgie and Steven Hay made him livid. “You’re so fucking good and kind and they just shit all over you.”
“Just because I love you doesn’t mean I want to hear this. It is what it is.”
He kissed the top of her head. “I hate it, Carm. You’re over here worrying and she doesn’t even check in?”
“Now it’s my turn to say you should listen to your own very good advice.” She shifted so they lay side by side, hands linked. Ginger hopped up on the bed and looked carefully over the mound of blankets to see if she was going to get busted.
Carmella wore a smile as Duke patted the mattress for Ginger to lie down.
“I know you want to fix things for me because you love me. But you know as well as I do that some things can’t be fixed. I hope she’ll have a happy ending. But I feel like her story will end in tears.”
He heard the emotion in her tone. “I’m sorry. The last thing I want is to upset you.”
She snorted. “Now you’re going to apologize all the time? Neither of us knows how to be with someone like this. So we’ll feel our way along. Fight. Because you’re pushy in a chipper and yet steadfast way and that’s super annoying.”
He laughed. “I missed this most of all.”
“Me telling you how annoying you can be? That’s probably true as most people are too busy fawning over you.”
“You don’t fawn over me?” he teased.
“I ogle you. I don’t have to fawn, though, because you’re mine. But you’re vexing sometimes and I’m going to say something when you are. I’ll blow it off mainly, I’ve come to discover.”
“I do have a superhuman ability to piss you off.”
“You like to rile me up.”
“We all know I’m a danger junkie. You’re so fucking magnificent when you’re mad I can’t help it.”
Carmella sighed. “Tomorrow is a big day, Mr. Bradshaw. Grand opening. Wait until you see the new showroom. It’s gorgeous. You left before they did the last bit of paint and finish work.”
“Everyone has been sending pictures but I’m pretty excited to see it myself tomorrow. I love you. I’m going to say that a lot more now since you’ve finally admitted you love me too.”
“No complaints here. I love you too.”