Fearless In Love
Page 33
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Susan tutted with sympathy. “I know how hard it is on him, but you have to stop blaming yourself, honey.” When he’d told Susan about Noah’s fall by the pool, she’d said the same thing. “You never believe you’re stepping up enough, but honey, I wish you’d see that you constantly take responsibility. You’re there for your brothers whenever they need you. You’re there for us without question. You’re there for your company, your people, even your business partners. And you are there in every way possible for Noah.”
“Then why can’t I find a way to fix Irene so that Noah isn’t brutalized after every one of her visits?” The same way Matt had been with every cruel word his father said, every time his mother refused to stick up for him or help him in any way. It ripped his heart to shreds watching his son. And it was his job to fix it. His inability to do so made him feel like he was just as bad of a parent as his own had been. In a different way, maybe, but the result was the same every time Noah cried himself to sleep, wasn’t it?
“You can’t fix Irene, honey. You can only be there for Noah. And you are, every single day.” Then she clucked at him. “I know what you’re thinking, but you’re nothing like your father.” When he didn’t answer, she added, “You listen to me—I’m not the only one who thinks you’re one of the best dads in the whole world. We all do.”
“Yes, ma’am,” he said as if she were his commanding officer. Which, to be honest, she was more often than not.
“Now tell me how that lovely Ariana is working out.” Susan had liked her the moment she’d met her, when they were all working to build the youth home in San Jose.
“Noah loves her. She turns everything they do into a learning experience. She’s even got him interested in mummies after she took him to the local museum.”
“I’m so glad. If you’d come back to me with another nanny horror story, I would have given up and moved out there to take care of Noah myself.”
All the Mavericks would love it if Bob and Susan moved out West, but they were born-and-bred Chicagoans. They loved the change of seasons, fall colors, white Christmas, and they were dying with impatience for Harper and Will’s holiday wedding.
If not for Susan and Bob, Matt would have avoided Chicago like a plague of rats. At least the Mavericks had moved the couple out of the old neighborhood, and with retirement, the two of them were finally enjoying life.
“You’ll see how great Ari is for yourself when you fly out for Will’s Halloween party,” he said.
At least, they’d see her if Matt didn’t screw everything up and lose her before then. He never took a nanny to a Maverick event. Yet he’d planned without question that Ari would go with them. Not only did she know Daniel and the rest of the Mavericks, it seemed natural to include her. Everything about her seemed so damned natural…
For the first time, he found himself wondering—was there a chance that Susan wouldn’t actually blame him for finding Ari irresistible?
Although, even that wouldn’t change the fact that he wasn’t right for Ari, that she needed a man who stepped up every time, who had moved past his shadows and would never crush her joy, her hopefulness.
“Oh, I hear Bob calling, sweetheart. We’re binge-watching Sons of Anarchy, and he’s dying for the next episode.”
Binge-watching Sons of Anarchy? Susan and Bob? Now that was scary. “That’s really violent, Mom. I’m shocked.” Midsomer Murders was more their speed. “Maybe I need to speak to Daniel about putting parental controls on your streaming service,” he teased.
“Do not even think about separating a woman from her streaming, especially when there are good-looking men on motorcycles involved,” she said with a mock growl, then blew him a kiss over the phone. “Dad sends his love.”
“Love you both too.”
As soon as he disconnected, his cell phone beeped with several texts that had come in while he was talking to Susan. After quickly checking to see if any of them were from Rafe regarding Ari’s brother, Matt had to work to bank his disappointment that his friend hadn’t turned up any real leads yet. Fortunately, there was one thing Matt could do to make things better. Something he hoped would not only make Noah smile, but Ari too.
Chapter Sixteen
Ari was surprised to find two burly men from the sporting goods store installing a safety net on the trampoline when she and Noah returned home. Though Noah was overjoyed, she made sure Matt’s name was on the work order.
“Can I, can I, can I?” Noah dashed around the lawn like a satellite orbiting the earth. “Please, please, please?”
She hunkered down in front of him. “Let’s wait for your daddy.” She was just as excited, though.
Maybe the water wings wouldn’t have to wait until next summer. Maybe Matt was starting to see he didn’t have to hold on so tightly or be so worried—and that his son would be safe if he let him fly a little higher once in a while.
She heard the car, and Noah ran to the driveway. Moments later, he was back, skipping around his father, herding him into the backyard.
Her pulse pumped harder, her heart beat faster, every nerve tingling for Matt. She’d heard all of her friends’ warnings, but she was beyond being careful.
Because she wanted to risk everything for the chance that true love might actually be real.
“Welcome home.” Her heart fluttered up to her throat, making her a little dizzy. “Noah got your present.” He smiled at her, and that was all it took for her heart to race like a wild thing. “Do you want to do the honors for the first bounce?”
“I’d rather watch Noah. And you, Ari. I want to see you both having fun together.”
It thrilled her to be included. As if she were more than just the nanny. As if she were family.
Noah was already running to the trampoline, and she scooped him up, tossing him into the middle before she climbed up. They jumped and rolled and played and his laughter filled the air.
It was glorious. It was freedom. It was like being the kid she’d never had a chance to be. When they finally came down, she was breathless…and Matt’s gaze was so hot she swore it set her skin on fire.
If Noah hadn’t launched himself at his father right then, she might have jumped on him herself.
“Come on, Daddy, you too.” At Matt’s back, Noah attempted to push the immovable object. Until finally it moved.
“Then why can’t I find a way to fix Irene so that Noah isn’t brutalized after every one of her visits?” The same way Matt had been with every cruel word his father said, every time his mother refused to stick up for him or help him in any way. It ripped his heart to shreds watching his son. And it was his job to fix it. His inability to do so made him feel like he was just as bad of a parent as his own had been. In a different way, maybe, but the result was the same every time Noah cried himself to sleep, wasn’t it?
“You can’t fix Irene, honey. You can only be there for Noah. And you are, every single day.” Then she clucked at him. “I know what you’re thinking, but you’re nothing like your father.” When he didn’t answer, she added, “You listen to me—I’m not the only one who thinks you’re one of the best dads in the whole world. We all do.”
“Yes, ma’am,” he said as if she were his commanding officer. Which, to be honest, she was more often than not.
“Now tell me how that lovely Ariana is working out.” Susan had liked her the moment she’d met her, when they were all working to build the youth home in San Jose.
“Noah loves her. She turns everything they do into a learning experience. She’s even got him interested in mummies after she took him to the local museum.”
“I’m so glad. If you’d come back to me with another nanny horror story, I would have given up and moved out there to take care of Noah myself.”
All the Mavericks would love it if Bob and Susan moved out West, but they were born-and-bred Chicagoans. They loved the change of seasons, fall colors, white Christmas, and they were dying with impatience for Harper and Will’s holiday wedding.
If not for Susan and Bob, Matt would have avoided Chicago like a plague of rats. At least the Mavericks had moved the couple out of the old neighborhood, and with retirement, the two of them were finally enjoying life.
“You’ll see how great Ari is for yourself when you fly out for Will’s Halloween party,” he said.
At least, they’d see her if Matt didn’t screw everything up and lose her before then. He never took a nanny to a Maverick event. Yet he’d planned without question that Ari would go with them. Not only did she know Daniel and the rest of the Mavericks, it seemed natural to include her. Everything about her seemed so damned natural…
For the first time, he found himself wondering—was there a chance that Susan wouldn’t actually blame him for finding Ari irresistible?
Although, even that wouldn’t change the fact that he wasn’t right for Ari, that she needed a man who stepped up every time, who had moved past his shadows and would never crush her joy, her hopefulness.
“Oh, I hear Bob calling, sweetheart. We’re binge-watching Sons of Anarchy, and he’s dying for the next episode.”
Binge-watching Sons of Anarchy? Susan and Bob? Now that was scary. “That’s really violent, Mom. I’m shocked.” Midsomer Murders was more their speed. “Maybe I need to speak to Daniel about putting parental controls on your streaming service,” he teased.
“Do not even think about separating a woman from her streaming, especially when there are good-looking men on motorcycles involved,” she said with a mock growl, then blew him a kiss over the phone. “Dad sends his love.”
“Love you both too.”
As soon as he disconnected, his cell phone beeped with several texts that had come in while he was talking to Susan. After quickly checking to see if any of them were from Rafe regarding Ari’s brother, Matt had to work to bank his disappointment that his friend hadn’t turned up any real leads yet. Fortunately, there was one thing Matt could do to make things better. Something he hoped would not only make Noah smile, but Ari too.
Chapter Sixteen
Ari was surprised to find two burly men from the sporting goods store installing a safety net on the trampoline when she and Noah returned home. Though Noah was overjoyed, she made sure Matt’s name was on the work order.
“Can I, can I, can I?” Noah dashed around the lawn like a satellite orbiting the earth. “Please, please, please?”
She hunkered down in front of him. “Let’s wait for your daddy.” She was just as excited, though.
Maybe the water wings wouldn’t have to wait until next summer. Maybe Matt was starting to see he didn’t have to hold on so tightly or be so worried—and that his son would be safe if he let him fly a little higher once in a while.
She heard the car, and Noah ran to the driveway. Moments later, he was back, skipping around his father, herding him into the backyard.
Her pulse pumped harder, her heart beat faster, every nerve tingling for Matt. She’d heard all of her friends’ warnings, but she was beyond being careful.
Because she wanted to risk everything for the chance that true love might actually be real.
“Welcome home.” Her heart fluttered up to her throat, making her a little dizzy. “Noah got your present.” He smiled at her, and that was all it took for her heart to race like a wild thing. “Do you want to do the honors for the first bounce?”
“I’d rather watch Noah. And you, Ari. I want to see you both having fun together.”
It thrilled her to be included. As if she were more than just the nanny. As if she were family.
Noah was already running to the trampoline, and she scooped him up, tossing him into the middle before she climbed up. They jumped and rolled and played and his laughter filled the air.
It was glorious. It was freedom. It was like being the kid she’d never had a chance to be. When they finally came down, she was breathless…and Matt’s gaze was so hot she swore it set her skin on fire.
If Noah hadn’t launched himself at his father right then, she might have jumped on him herself.
“Come on, Daddy, you too.” At Matt’s back, Noah attempted to push the immovable object. Until finally it moved.