“How old do you think I am?” he asked her.
“Fifteen, tops,” she said. “So how old are you?”
“Fifteen,” he admitted. “I got the job because my uncle owns the place. I’m here for the rest of the summer. How old are you?”
“Fourteen,” Rennie said.
He finally looked over at me. I’d been staring into the glass freezers, my arms wrapped around me, pretending not to listen. “I’ve seen you here before,” he said. “You got blueberry last time, right? With sprinkles?”
I nodded.
On the way home I said to Rennie, “I can’t believe he remembered me.”
She said, “Of course he remembered you. There are, like, no Asians on the island.”
I looked at her to see if she was joking, but she was already onto the next thing. It was true that there were hardly any other Asian families on the island. But she’d never brought it up before. My being different from her.
She hooked up with him later that week. It was on a day that I was at the barn. She got mad because I told her I couldn’t go to the beach because I had a horseback-riding lesson. I don’t remember the boy’s name. I couldn’t even get mad about it, because what would I have done with him? It’s not like I would have made out with him on the docks like she did. I wasn’t allowed to go on dates.
The thing I remember about it was how it made me feel when she assumed the only reason he would remember me was my Asianness. Like there was nothing else special or worth remembering about me. The idea prickled under my skin and stayed there for a long time.
CHAPTER FORTY-NINE
Lil mentioned something about maybe hanging out this weekend, but I was still surprised when she texted today asking if Mary and I wanted to sleep over. That was something totally new. I texted back sure, why not, and I dug my sleeping bag out of the garage. I think the last time I went to an actual sleepover was back in the day when I was friends with Rennie.
Pat couldn’t drop me off. Our car was busted again. There were a few guys in our garage. Most of them were drinking. Ricky wasn’t. “Okay. Guess I’ll walk.”
I’m about halfway down the driveway when Ricky comes after me.
“I actually need to gas up my bike, so I can give you a ride if you want.”
I stare him down. “Thanks but no thanks.” I don’t need the charity.
“Kat, wait.”
“What, Ricky?” I make sure I sound bored, uninterested.
“You’re ignoring me. Why? Because I wouldn’t kiss you?”
Damn. He doesn’t beat around the bush. Well, neither will I. “What makes you think I wanted to kiss you? Don’t flatter yourself.”
Ricky laughs. “Um, you pushed me against the wall and you were about two seconds from eating my face off.”
I sneer. Who does this ass**le think he is? “You must have been dreaming.”
“Look. Do you want me to come clean?”
I stop walking and spin around. “Speak.”
“I do like you. I’ve liked you for a while.”
“Then what’s the problem?”
Ricky makes a half turn to the garage. “It’s Pat, okay? I tried to come correct, tell him how I felt about you, but he told me to step off.”
“Shouldn’t I be the one to make those decisions?”
“He wasn’t saying it to be a dick. But you know, you’re applying to that fancy college, and I don’t think he wants anything to distract you. Plus, he’s my friend. If he draws that line, I ain’t going to cross it.” He shakes his head. “Anyway, what would we have together? A few months, tops? And then you’d leave? I don’t want to . . . you know, fall for you any worse than I already have.”
Okay, seriously. That is sweet of Pat. But also, what the hell is he doing, sticking his big nose into my affairs? He can’t bother to pick his shit up around the house, but he needs to weigh in on who I can and can’t hook up with?
In some ways it’s a blessing in disguise. ’Cause I like Ricky, but I for sure haven’t fallen for him. Not the way he’s talking about.
I give him a peck on the cheek. “Friends?”
He looks glum, but he offers up a weak smile. “Yeah. Friends.”
Mary’s waiting on the steps when Ricky drops me off. “Hey,” I say. “Why are you outside?”
“Hey, yourself,” Mary says, cocking her eyebrow. “I don’t
think Lil’s home. I’ve been knocking forever, but she hasn’t answered.”
“Huh.”
I ring the bell ad a few seconds later Lil throws the door open and beams a big smile. “Yay! You guys are finally here!” She’s wearing a big Harvard sweatshirt and leggings and thick socks. No makeup. Her hair up in a towel. Guess she was in the shower.
“Thanks for inviting us,” Mary chirps.
We come inside, and it takes me forever to unlace my combat boots. Taking shoes off and on is annoying. The people in my family will pass out in bed with their shoes on.
When I’ve finally got them off, Lillia leads us through the foyer to the kitchen. I lift myself onto the marble kitchen island, and Mary sits at the table.
“So how’d it go last night?” Mary asks.
Lillia tugs on the sleeves of her sweatshirt so her hands disappear inside. “Not awesome. You guys, there’s no way we’re making it to New Year’s Eve. I . . . I think it’s over.”
I roll my eyes. “You’ve said that, like, ten times Lil!”
Lillia shakes her head defiantly. “It’s different this time. I think Reeve was jerking me around me from the start.”
Mary folds her arms. “No way. He’s in love with you, Lil. I’ve seen it with my own eyes.”
“Mary, he’s been playing me the same way he played you!”
“All right, all right,” I say. “What happened? Did he not show up to the party?”
“No, no. He came. And things were going well . . .” “And?” Mary leans forward, looking tense as hell.
Lillia’s face turns pink. “See, we had this talk the other day. About taking things public. Letting our friends know we’re together. He was the one who was pushing for it!” She bites her bottom lip. “So when I saw an opportunity last night, I went for it. In front of everyone. Alex. Rennie. Everybody.”
Wow. I have to hand it to Lil. She really is all in. Girl went the extra mile.
“But then he freaking denies me. He leaves me hanging in front of everyone!” Lillia turns to Mary, her eyes wide. “All night I thought about you, Mary. And that day on the ferry. How humiliated you must have been.” She shakes her head. She can’t even finish her thought.
“Fifteen, tops,” she said. “So how old are you?”
“Fifteen,” he admitted. “I got the job because my uncle owns the place. I’m here for the rest of the summer. How old are you?”
“Fourteen,” Rennie said.
He finally looked over at me. I’d been staring into the glass freezers, my arms wrapped around me, pretending not to listen. “I’ve seen you here before,” he said. “You got blueberry last time, right? With sprinkles?”
I nodded.
On the way home I said to Rennie, “I can’t believe he remembered me.”
She said, “Of course he remembered you. There are, like, no Asians on the island.”
I looked at her to see if she was joking, but she was already onto the next thing. It was true that there were hardly any other Asian families on the island. But she’d never brought it up before. My being different from her.
She hooked up with him later that week. It was on a day that I was at the barn. She got mad because I told her I couldn’t go to the beach because I had a horseback-riding lesson. I don’t remember the boy’s name. I couldn’t even get mad about it, because what would I have done with him? It’s not like I would have made out with him on the docks like she did. I wasn’t allowed to go on dates.
The thing I remember about it was how it made me feel when she assumed the only reason he would remember me was my Asianness. Like there was nothing else special or worth remembering about me. The idea prickled under my skin and stayed there for a long time.
CHAPTER FORTY-NINE
Lil mentioned something about maybe hanging out this weekend, but I was still surprised when she texted today asking if Mary and I wanted to sleep over. That was something totally new. I texted back sure, why not, and I dug my sleeping bag out of the garage. I think the last time I went to an actual sleepover was back in the day when I was friends with Rennie.
Pat couldn’t drop me off. Our car was busted again. There were a few guys in our garage. Most of them were drinking. Ricky wasn’t. “Okay. Guess I’ll walk.”
I’m about halfway down the driveway when Ricky comes after me.
“I actually need to gas up my bike, so I can give you a ride if you want.”
I stare him down. “Thanks but no thanks.” I don’t need the charity.
“Kat, wait.”
“What, Ricky?” I make sure I sound bored, uninterested.
“You’re ignoring me. Why? Because I wouldn’t kiss you?”
Damn. He doesn’t beat around the bush. Well, neither will I. “What makes you think I wanted to kiss you? Don’t flatter yourself.”
Ricky laughs. “Um, you pushed me against the wall and you were about two seconds from eating my face off.”
I sneer. Who does this ass**le think he is? “You must have been dreaming.”
“Look. Do you want me to come clean?”
I stop walking and spin around. “Speak.”
“I do like you. I’ve liked you for a while.”
“Then what’s the problem?”
Ricky makes a half turn to the garage. “It’s Pat, okay? I tried to come correct, tell him how I felt about you, but he told me to step off.”
“Shouldn’t I be the one to make those decisions?”
“He wasn’t saying it to be a dick. But you know, you’re applying to that fancy college, and I don’t think he wants anything to distract you. Plus, he’s my friend. If he draws that line, I ain’t going to cross it.” He shakes his head. “Anyway, what would we have together? A few months, tops? And then you’d leave? I don’t want to . . . you know, fall for you any worse than I already have.”
Okay, seriously. That is sweet of Pat. But also, what the hell is he doing, sticking his big nose into my affairs? He can’t bother to pick his shit up around the house, but he needs to weigh in on who I can and can’t hook up with?
In some ways it’s a blessing in disguise. ’Cause I like Ricky, but I for sure haven’t fallen for him. Not the way he’s talking about.
I give him a peck on the cheek. “Friends?”
He looks glum, but he offers up a weak smile. “Yeah. Friends.”
Mary’s waiting on the steps when Ricky drops me off. “Hey,” I say. “Why are you outside?”
“Hey, yourself,” Mary says, cocking her eyebrow. “I don’t
think Lil’s home. I’ve been knocking forever, but she hasn’t answered.”
“Huh.”
I ring the bell ad a few seconds later Lil throws the door open and beams a big smile. “Yay! You guys are finally here!” She’s wearing a big Harvard sweatshirt and leggings and thick socks. No makeup. Her hair up in a towel. Guess she was in the shower.
“Thanks for inviting us,” Mary chirps.
We come inside, and it takes me forever to unlace my combat boots. Taking shoes off and on is annoying. The people in my family will pass out in bed with their shoes on.
When I’ve finally got them off, Lillia leads us through the foyer to the kitchen. I lift myself onto the marble kitchen island, and Mary sits at the table.
“So how’d it go last night?” Mary asks.
Lillia tugs on the sleeves of her sweatshirt so her hands disappear inside. “Not awesome. You guys, there’s no way we’re making it to New Year’s Eve. I . . . I think it’s over.”
I roll my eyes. “You’ve said that, like, ten times Lil!”
Lillia shakes her head defiantly. “It’s different this time. I think Reeve was jerking me around me from the start.”
Mary folds her arms. “No way. He’s in love with you, Lil. I’ve seen it with my own eyes.”
“Mary, he’s been playing me the same way he played you!”
“All right, all right,” I say. “What happened? Did he not show up to the party?”
“No, no. He came. And things were going well . . .” “And?” Mary leans forward, looking tense as hell.
Lillia’s face turns pink. “See, we had this talk the other day. About taking things public. Letting our friends know we’re together. He was the one who was pushing for it!” She bites her bottom lip. “So when I saw an opportunity last night, I went for it. In front of everyone. Alex. Rennie. Everybody.”
Wow. I have to hand it to Lil. She really is all in. Girl went the extra mile.
“But then he freaking denies me. He leaves me hanging in front of everyone!” Lillia turns to Mary, her eyes wide. “All night I thought about you, Mary. And that day on the ferry. How humiliated you must have been.” She shakes her head. She can’t even finish her thought.
