Rennie stares out the window; her eyes are laser beams. “When I find them, they’re so dead.” Every car that passes, she looks to see who might be in it.
To be honest, I feel bad for her. Not getting to enjoy her own party after she worked so hard on it. I don’t even know what to believe right now, but I can’t help feeling pissed at Lillia.
This better be a huge misunderstanding. I can’t even think about the alternative, if Rennie somehow has this right in her head. If Reeve and Lillia have something real going, I’ll kill Lillia myself. Because doing that to Mary would be the most f**ked-up thing in the whole world.
We get to my house. Rennie and I both get out of her Jeep. She slams her door loud, and with too much force. She’s still pissed. Really really pissed.
“Give me my keys,” Rennie says. “I’ll drive by the cliffs. You check the dunes.”
I have this feeling, this terrible feeling that something bad is going to happen.
I squeeze my hand around her keys. The ring is full of charms and shit that dig into my hands. “Are you sure you’re okay to drive? You’re so upset. And you’ve been drinking.”
“I’m fine.” She takes the keys out of my hand. As she does, she looks up at me and gives me a half smile. I get the feeling that she’s happy I’m not giving her a guilt trip or a hard sell or offering to sleep over so I can babysit her. We never had that kind of friendship anyway. So it seems weird to try and have it now.
I get in the car as Rennie peels out.
But I don’t drive to the dunes, like she wants. I drive back to the party. I have to get those pictures, before anyone else finds them.
I hope Lillia knows what she’s doing. ’Cause if she doesn’t, we’re dead.
CHAPTER SIXTY-ONE
I don’t know how I make myself get up off the ground and go to Rennie’s party. I’m in such a fog; I feel like I’m floating outside my body, watching myself move down the streets. Snow has started falling, tiny gentle flakes, dusting the ground and the trees and the dead grass. I can’t even feel the cold. I try to swallow, but my throat is closed. What happened to my dad? Why didn’t my mom let me go with her? Did they really leave me all alone?
My powers couldn’t stop them.
When I get down to T-Town, I break into a run, all the way to the gallery. I need to find Lillia and Kat. They’ll help me. They’ll help me find my mom and Aunt Bette.
I reach the gallery door and come face-to-face with a bouncer in a black pinstripe suit and black fedora pulled low over his eyes. I think about trying to slip right past him, but he’s so big, he fills the door frame like a human wall. Just beyond him I hear music and laughter and merriment, and it makes my chest hurt, because I’m so far from any of that right now. I doubt I’ll ever laugh again.
“I need to find my friends,” I say, desperate, breathless. “They’re inside.”
He doesn’t say anything, doesn’t even raise his chin so I can look him in the eyes.
Crap. The stupid speakeasy password. What was it? I had it written down, in my purse. I rack my brain but I can’t hold on to any thought. It’s all a jumble. “Please, sir. Please. This is an emergency.”
Again the bouncer doesn’t say anything. I wonder how many kids he’s turned away tonight. People Rennie didn’t think belonged in her company. I pull on my hair, hard, but it doesn’t hurt, and I concentrate all my energy on willing myself to remember. “I know there’s a password to get in. My friend told me. I . . . I even know the special one where I don’t have to pay a cover charge. Rennie invited us herself. But I—I . . . My friend Kat, she’s definitely inside. She has short black hair.” The bodyguard arches his back into a deep, long stretch, and then fishes a flask out of his jacket pocket.
I think about trying to ask for Rennie, but she probably wouldn’t let me in. Not after the way I acted when Aunt Bette came to the gallery to get her paintings back. I can’t even bribe my way in with money because I don’t have a red cent on me.
It finally comes to me. “Moonshine! Moonshine! Moonshine!” I shout it as loud as I can, but the bodyguard still pretends not to hear me. It’s like I’m not even standing in front of him. My lips quiver and the tears come. What’s happening? “Please,” I’m begging. “Please let me in.” Only it’s no use.
I walk backward away from him and try peeking through the foggy glass in the front window. I don’t see Kat or Lillia inside, can’t make either of them out in the crowds of revelers. But I know they are here. I can feel it. I sit down on the curb and touch for my heartbeat, because it feels like it’s pounding in my chest, but I can’t feel a thing. Probably because it’s broken.
And then, suddenly, I turn my head back to the gallery door, and there’s Lillia standing out front on the curb. She’s shivering in a thin dress and her stockings. Is she looking for me? She must have felt that I needed her.
I step toward her, but then Reeve appears, carrying her coat. He wraps her in it. They run across the street, and Reeve picks up Lillia and puts her inside the cab of his truck. They seem like they’re in a hurry.
They kiss on the lips before they drive away. A tender, slow, warm kiss.
Oh no. Oh no.
I turn around; I’m spinning. I can’t breathe. It’s like I’ve been kicked in the stomach. From out the back of the store, Rennie’s white Jeep goes flying down the road in the other direction. Kat’s behind the wheel.
I lift a shaky hand and push my hair behind my ears. I’ve got nowhere to go, no idea what’s going on. My whole world is falling apart.
Maybe I can catch Mom and Aunt Bette before the ferry leaves. I can make them take me with them. So I run. I run as fast as I can, my shoes slipping on the slick roads, and scream, “Wait for me! Wait for me!” until my throat is raw. I know they won’t hear me, I’m too far, but I have to do something.
I get to the ferry landing. Normally bright, tonight it’s cloaked in darkness. I search the parking lot, but it’s empty. A thick metal chain ropes off the entrance. All the white lights running along the planks are turned off. The ferry has stopped running. Mom and Aunt Bette must have boarded the last one.
They’re gone.
I don’t even know what to do. I head up the hill, sobbing. I don’t know how long I walk for.
A white Jeep pulls up beside me. Inside is Rennie. I can tell she’s been crying, the way her makeup raccoons around her eyes.
To be honest, I feel bad for her. Not getting to enjoy her own party after she worked so hard on it. I don’t even know what to believe right now, but I can’t help feeling pissed at Lillia.
This better be a huge misunderstanding. I can’t even think about the alternative, if Rennie somehow has this right in her head. If Reeve and Lillia have something real going, I’ll kill Lillia myself. Because doing that to Mary would be the most f**ked-up thing in the whole world.
We get to my house. Rennie and I both get out of her Jeep. She slams her door loud, and with too much force. She’s still pissed. Really really pissed.
“Give me my keys,” Rennie says. “I’ll drive by the cliffs. You check the dunes.”
I have this feeling, this terrible feeling that something bad is going to happen.
I squeeze my hand around her keys. The ring is full of charms and shit that dig into my hands. “Are you sure you’re okay to drive? You’re so upset. And you’ve been drinking.”
“I’m fine.” She takes the keys out of my hand. As she does, she looks up at me and gives me a half smile. I get the feeling that she’s happy I’m not giving her a guilt trip or a hard sell or offering to sleep over so I can babysit her. We never had that kind of friendship anyway. So it seems weird to try and have it now.
I get in the car as Rennie peels out.
But I don’t drive to the dunes, like she wants. I drive back to the party. I have to get those pictures, before anyone else finds them.
I hope Lillia knows what she’s doing. ’Cause if she doesn’t, we’re dead.
CHAPTER SIXTY-ONE
I don’t know how I make myself get up off the ground and go to Rennie’s party. I’m in such a fog; I feel like I’m floating outside my body, watching myself move down the streets. Snow has started falling, tiny gentle flakes, dusting the ground and the trees and the dead grass. I can’t even feel the cold. I try to swallow, but my throat is closed. What happened to my dad? Why didn’t my mom let me go with her? Did they really leave me all alone?
My powers couldn’t stop them.
When I get down to T-Town, I break into a run, all the way to the gallery. I need to find Lillia and Kat. They’ll help me. They’ll help me find my mom and Aunt Bette.
I reach the gallery door and come face-to-face with a bouncer in a black pinstripe suit and black fedora pulled low over his eyes. I think about trying to slip right past him, but he’s so big, he fills the door frame like a human wall. Just beyond him I hear music and laughter and merriment, and it makes my chest hurt, because I’m so far from any of that right now. I doubt I’ll ever laugh again.
“I need to find my friends,” I say, desperate, breathless. “They’re inside.”
He doesn’t say anything, doesn’t even raise his chin so I can look him in the eyes.
Crap. The stupid speakeasy password. What was it? I had it written down, in my purse. I rack my brain but I can’t hold on to any thought. It’s all a jumble. “Please, sir. Please. This is an emergency.”
Again the bouncer doesn’t say anything. I wonder how many kids he’s turned away tonight. People Rennie didn’t think belonged in her company. I pull on my hair, hard, but it doesn’t hurt, and I concentrate all my energy on willing myself to remember. “I know there’s a password to get in. My friend told me. I . . . I even know the special one where I don’t have to pay a cover charge. Rennie invited us herself. But I—I . . . My friend Kat, she’s definitely inside. She has short black hair.” The bodyguard arches his back into a deep, long stretch, and then fishes a flask out of his jacket pocket.
I think about trying to ask for Rennie, but she probably wouldn’t let me in. Not after the way I acted when Aunt Bette came to the gallery to get her paintings back. I can’t even bribe my way in with money because I don’t have a red cent on me.
It finally comes to me. “Moonshine! Moonshine! Moonshine!” I shout it as loud as I can, but the bodyguard still pretends not to hear me. It’s like I’m not even standing in front of him. My lips quiver and the tears come. What’s happening? “Please,” I’m begging. “Please let me in.” Only it’s no use.
I walk backward away from him and try peeking through the foggy glass in the front window. I don’t see Kat or Lillia inside, can’t make either of them out in the crowds of revelers. But I know they are here. I can feel it. I sit down on the curb and touch for my heartbeat, because it feels like it’s pounding in my chest, but I can’t feel a thing. Probably because it’s broken.
And then, suddenly, I turn my head back to the gallery door, and there’s Lillia standing out front on the curb. She’s shivering in a thin dress and her stockings. Is she looking for me? She must have felt that I needed her.
I step toward her, but then Reeve appears, carrying her coat. He wraps her in it. They run across the street, and Reeve picks up Lillia and puts her inside the cab of his truck. They seem like they’re in a hurry.
They kiss on the lips before they drive away. A tender, slow, warm kiss.
Oh no. Oh no.
I turn around; I’m spinning. I can’t breathe. It’s like I’ve been kicked in the stomach. From out the back of the store, Rennie’s white Jeep goes flying down the road in the other direction. Kat’s behind the wheel.
I lift a shaky hand and push my hair behind my ears. I’ve got nowhere to go, no idea what’s going on. My whole world is falling apart.
Maybe I can catch Mom and Aunt Bette before the ferry leaves. I can make them take me with them. So I run. I run as fast as I can, my shoes slipping on the slick roads, and scream, “Wait for me! Wait for me!” until my throat is raw. I know they won’t hear me, I’m too far, but I have to do something.
I get to the ferry landing. Normally bright, tonight it’s cloaked in darkness. I search the parking lot, but it’s empty. A thick metal chain ropes off the entrance. All the white lights running along the planks are turned off. The ferry has stopped running. Mom and Aunt Bette must have boarded the last one.
They’re gone.
I don’t even know what to do. I head up the hill, sobbing. I don’t know how long I walk for.
A white Jeep pulls up beside me. Inside is Rennie. I can tell she’s been crying, the way her makeup raccoons around her eyes.
