No kids. I refuse to have children. “I don’t really know. I’ve never thought about it.”
“Seriously? You’ve never thought about your future and where you’d like to be? What you’d like to be?”
“Not once.” The most I’d ever thought about the future was in terms of weeks.
“I thought girls start planning their weddings when they’re little, and have crazy dreams like being an actress or a singer.”
I shrugged. When I was little, I wanted to grow up to be a princess. But my dad treated me like one, so I’d already thought I was one. The day he died, all dreams of the future stopped, and I hadn’t had one since. “What about you?”
“I want to finish college and move back to the ranch so I can take over it for my dad. Other than a family, that’s all I’ve ever wanted.”
“That sounds perfect for you.” I was already jealous of his future wife.
“You’ve really never thought about it? Never aspired to be a doctor, or a scientist, or a coffee shop girl?”
I laughed and rolled my eyes even though he couldn’t see. “Nope.”
“Everyone thinks about their future, but if you don’t want to tell me, that’s fine, I get it,” he joked, and squeezed me tighter. When I didn’t say anything for a few minutes, he whispered, “Are you with me, or did you fall asleep?”
“Gage, can I tell you something I’ve never told anyone?” I asked softly.
“Of course you can.”
“I wasn’t lying to you, I really haven’t ever thought about what I wanted to do with my life. I, uh . . .” Clearing my throat, I tried again. “I never thought I’d live long enough to be able to move out of that house, so it seemed pointless to think about the future.”
“Cass,” he breathed, “I’m so—”
“No, I didn’t tell you that so you’d feel sorry for me. I just didn’t want you to think I was keeping something from you. I want you to know who I really am, Gage.”
He didn’t talk for a moment. “Thank you for trusting me with that.” He rolled me onto my back, his left arm still under me, and propped himself on his elbow. Brushing back loose strands of hair, he ran his fingers down my jaw; my eyes shut and I tilted my head back when he continued the line down my neck. “You’re away from them; you’ll never have to see them again. You have your whole life ahead of you, darlin’.” His voice dropped another octave and my eyes shot back open when I felt his breath on my lips. “It’s okay to dream about the future.”
My heart started racing as he slowly lowered his body to mine. Heat zinged through my entire body when his chest pressed against me, his lips still hovering less than an inch from my own. Our eyes searched each other, and his green eyes darkened as he leaned in closer to brush his lips across my forehead and both cheeks. Pulling back slightly, he waited, giving me the opportunity to stop him. I ran a hand through his messy black hair and curled it around the back of his neck, giving the slightest pressure so he’d know I wanted this too. A soft smile broke across his face and he leaned toward me again. Just before his lips could meet mine, my cell phone blared Tyler’s ringtone.
We both started and stared at each other for a long moment before I reached into my pocket and grabbed my phone. “Hey, Tyler.”
“Hey! God, I can’t wait to see you, you won’t believe what a shitty day it’s been. I’m about to leave but I’m starving. Do you want me to pick up some food?”
Gage was still hovering less than an inch above my face, his eyes locked on mine.
“Uh, no. We already ate. We went for a drive though, so you might make it home before we do.”
“Oh. Yeah, okay.”
I sighed and shut my eyes. I hated not being there for Tyler, even if it was just when he got home from a long day at school. He’d been there for me almost every night for eleven years; I owed it to him to be waiting for him when he got back. “We’re on our way, promise. See you soon.”
“All right, love you, Cassi.”
“Love you too, Ty.”
Gage was off me and out of the bed of the truck before I could even end the call. I knew I’d ruined the moment the second I’d grabbed for the phone, but there was no way I could ignore a call from Ty. Surely he knew that.
“We better get going.” He acted like nothing had just happened. “It’s already really late, and you have to work in the morning.”
I wanted to groan into my hands. I couldn’t believe I’d just stopped that kiss from happening. And there was no way I could salvage the situation now. Gage didn’t say anything the entire way back; his right hand was on the steering wheel, making his body lean away from me. I knew this was my fault, so I stayed pressed against the passenger-side door and didn’t push him to talk to me either. Tyler tried to take me into the bedroom as soon as we got home, but Gage stopped us.
“Tyler, can I talk to you for a minute first?”
“Sure, man.” He hugged me quickly and told me he’d meet me in our room after.
I waited anxiously on the edge of the bed for when he’d come back, my knees bouncing up and down. Thankfully he wasn’t in there long and not five minutes later he was walking into our room, shutting and locking the door behind him.
“Cassi, you need to leave Gage alone for a while.”
I froze. “What? Why?”
“Seriously? You’ve never thought about your future and where you’d like to be? What you’d like to be?”
“Not once.” The most I’d ever thought about the future was in terms of weeks.
“I thought girls start planning their weddings when they’re little, and have crazy dreams like being an actress or a singer.”
I shrugged. When I was little, I wanted to grow up to be a princess. But my dad treated me like one, so I’d already thought I was one. The day he died, all dreams of the future stopped, and I hadn’t had one since. “What about you?”
“I want to finish college and move back to the ranch so I can take over it for my dad. Other than a family, that’s all I’ve ever wanted.”
“That sounds perfect for you.” I was already jealous of his future wife.
“You’ve really never thought about it? Never aspired to be a doctor, or a scientist, or a coffee shop girl?”
I laughed and rolled my eyes even though he couldn’t see. “Nope.”
“Everyone thinks about their future, but if you don’t want to tell me, that’s fine, I get it,” he joked, and squeezed me tighter. When I didn’t say anything for a few minutes, he whispered, “Are you with me, or did you fall asleep?”
“Gage, can I tell you something I’ve never told anyone?” I asked softly.
“Of course you can.”
“I wasn’t lying to you, I really haven’t ever thought about what I wanted to do with my life. I, uh . . .” Clearing my throat, I tried again. “I never thought I’d live long enough to be able to move out of that house, so it seemed pointless to think about the future.”
“Cass,” he breathed, “I’m so—”
“No, I didn’t tell you that so you’d feel sorry for me. I just didn’t want you to think I was keeping something from you. I want you to know who I really am, Gage.”
He didn’t talk for a moment. “Thank you for trusting me with that.” He rolled me onto my back, his left arm still under me, and propped himself on his elbow. Brushing back loose strands of hair, he ran his fingers down my jaw; my eyes shut and I tilted my head back when he continued the line down my neck. “You’re away from them; you’ll never have to see them again. You have your whole life ahead of you, darlin’.” His voice dropped another octave and my eyes shot back open when I felt his breath on my lips. “It’s okay to dream about the future.”
My heart started racing as he slowly lowered his body to mine. Heat zinged through my entire body when his chest pressed against me, his lips still hovering less than an inch from my own. Our eyes searched each other, and his green eyes darkened as he leaned in closer to brush his lips across my forehead and both cheeks. Pulling back slightly, he waited, giving me the opportunity to stop him. I ran a hand through his messy black hair and curled it around the back of his neck, giving the slightest pressure so he’d know I wanted this too. A soft smile broke across his face and he leaned toward me again. Just before his lips could meet mine, my cell phone blared Tyler’s ringtone.
We both started and stared at each other for a long moment before I reached into my pocket and grabbed my phone. “Hey, Tyler.”
“Hey! God, I can’t wait to see you, you won’t believe what a shitty day it’s been. I’m about to leave but I’m starving. Do you want me to pick up some food?”
Gage was still hovering less than an inch above my face, his eyes locked on mine.
“Uh, no. We already ate. We went for a drive though, so you might make it home before we do.”
“Oh. Yeah, okay.”
I sighed and shut my eyes. I hated not being there for Tyler, even if it was just when he got home from a long day at school. He’d been there for me almost every night for eleven years; I owed it to him to be waiting for him when he got back. “We’re on our way, promise. See you soon.”
“All right, love you, Cassi.”
“Love you too, Ty.”
Gage was off me and out of the bed of the truck before I could even end the call. I knew I’d ruined the moment the second I’d grabbed for the phone, but there was no way I could ignore a call from Ty. Surely he knew that.
“We better get going.” He acted like nothing had just happened. “It’s already really late, and you have to work in the morning.”
I wanted to groan into my hands. I couldn’t believe I’d just stopped that kiss from happening. And there was no way I could salvage the situation now. Gage didn’t say anything the entire way back; his right hand was on the steering wheel, making his body lean away from me. I knew this was my fault, so I stayed pressed against the passenger-side door and didn’t push him to talk to me either. Tyler tried to take me into the bedroom as soon as we got home, but Gage stopped us.
“Tyler, can I talk to you for a minute first?”
“Sure, man.” He hugged me quickly and told me he’d meet me in our room after.
I waited anxiously on the edge of the bed for when he’d come back, my knees bouncing up and down. Thankfully he wasn’t in there long and not five minutes later he was walking into our room, shutting and locking the door behind him.
“Cassi, you need to leave Gage alone for a while.”
I froze. “What? Why?”
