Grave Phantoms
Page 68

“The fog’s still rolling back down toward the city, and it’s early. Give it a little time to warm up out there. How about a nice hot bath first? Might make you feel better.”
“Together?” she said.
“It’s an old tub, but it’s big.”
She smiled her consent, and they spent the better part of an hour in the big bathtub, mostly lounging and exploring each other’s bodies. She was too sore for anything else—that quickly became obvious to Bo. He forced her to take aspirin, and they helped bathed each other, which was a small but satisfying pleasure, then groomed themselves as best they could with what meager supplies the cottage provided.
After dressing in last night’s clothes, they scrounged the small kitchen for a breakfast of soda crackers, peanut butter, and hot tea. The tea was Bo’s private stash of Longjing Dragon Well tea, imported from China, and for which he’d traded Canadian whiskey. The teacups were mismatched and the plates chipped, but Astrid didn’t seem to care. Dressed in their coats, they took their meager meal outside in the briny morning air to a small stone table that overlooked the ocean, and with the blanket from the bed wrapped around them, ate while the sun continued to rise.
Astrid curled her fingers around the hot teacup and inhaled deeply. “This is perfect. Let’s stay here and never leave.”
“And what would we do for money?”
“That is a problem, isn’t it?” She lay her head on his shoulder and tugged the blanket tighter around them. A seagull sailed in front of them and landed on the cottage roof with a loud squawk. When the bird settled down, she said, “Bo? I need to tell you something.”
His heart skittered inside his chest, but he tried not to let any panic show. “You can always tell me anything, unconditionally.”
“I know. It’s just that I’m a little ashamed of this. Well, a lot. Do you remember when we went to the Anthropology annex to see Lowe and Hadley, and you asked me what Hadley and I discussed privately?”
“And you refused to tell me. Yes, I remember.”
“Well . . . the thing is, I’d asked for her advice because I’m doing poorly in school. My grades are terrible across the board, but Luke, that is, Professor Barnes, failed me.”
Bo felt a flush of anger in the center of his chest. “That rotten, dirty pig. He lures you into sleeping with him and then turns around and fails you?”
“He didn’t lure me. I’m not defending him—”
“That man should be suspended from his post. And I’m not just saying that because I want to choke the life out of him for touching you.”
She put a hand on his wrist. “I know you do. But the fact of the matter is that I stopped going to class. So they are threatening to expel me.”
Oh. That wasn’t good. At all.
Bo didn’t know how to feel about this, but he could see plainly that Astrid was anxiously avoiding his eyes. “Maybe Lowe could talk to somebody,” he suggested. “After all, he works for U.C. Berkeley.”
“Another reason not to raise a stink. He’s trying to build a life with Hadley that doesn’t rely on illegal activities. His reputation is precarious, especially considering the family business. I’m not putting his job in jeopardy over my poor grades and attendance. That’s not fair to him.”
As much as he wanted to argue, she had a point. But he damn sure wished she hadn’t put it that way, because it only made him feel that Lowe was doing the right thing, and here Bo was, on the illegal side of the family business with Winter.
She scratched her forehead and looked out over the water. “I have one more shot in January. One semester to bring my grades up before they expel me. And I guess that’s what I’m struggling with. Do I go back?”
“Of course you go back. Do you know how many women in this city would love to have that opportunity?”
“I know, but what if I’m not a scholar? And what about us? Being apart nearly killed me, and that was when I only had hope. Now I have this,” she said, putting a hand on his chest. “How am I going to go back now?”
He sighed heavily. No matter how hard he’d tried to avoid that negative inner voice, there it was, saying, I told you so. You thought happiness would be easy? Think again. There’s always a price.
“We will find a way to make it work. I can take the train down to see you.”
“When? You work six days a week. I’ll bet you have runs tonight, don’t you?”
He did. “Winter will give me the time off,” he said, but as soon as it was out of his mouth, he knew it was a lie. Once Winter found out what Bo had been doing with his sister . . .
All his old worries tumbled back. Winter would disown him. Bo would lose his job and wouldn’t be allowed to go near Astrid. He could see it all in his mind, playing out like a picture show in a theater.
He tried to shove them all back into the dark corners of his mind and busied himself spreading peanut butter on a cracker. He handed it to Astrid, but she didn’t eat it. He took a big gulp of hot tea and attempted to clear his head.
“If I didn’t go back to school . . .” Astrid said softly. “And I’m not saying I’m giving up, but I can’t help but wonder why I’m doing something that makes me miserable, and that maybe there’s something else out there for me. Hadley says I just need to find out what that is.”
Bo didn’t know how to help her find that. He didn’t know how to find it himself.