After a few minutes, I calm down enough to push myself back up to my feet. I need to just suck it up. I can’t let him see the effect he still has on me. That will only allow him to hurt me again. I won’t let that happen.
“Okay. You can do this,” I whisper. “He’s part of the past. He’s part of the past.” I try to convince myself but I suck at it. “Dammit.”
I stand up tall and take a deep breath before exhaling and pulling the bathroom door open. What I see in front of me causes my breath to be taken away . . . again.
Hemy is standing there still shirtless, just staring at the door as if he had been waiting for it to open.
“Onyx,” Hemy whispers. His eyes are soft and caring as they meet mine. Something in them looks different but I can’t tell what that means just yet. It’s like he’s looking at me with different eyes than before. It makes me want to believe he’s clean but I know that’s almost impossible. “We need to talk about us.”
“Hemy,” I breathe in frustration. I run my hands through my hair and close my eyes. “There is nothing to talk about. There hasn’t been an us in a very long time.”
I try to step around Hemy, but he places one arm against the wall, blocking me in. “There is an us. There always has been and you know it.” He stops and brings his eyes down to my lips. He licks his own and slides his free hand in the back of my hair. “I’ve missed you, Onyx. I’ve tried for the last four years to find you but your family are stubborn assholes. I’ve ended up at their doorstep once a month for the last four years. They’re definitely dedicated. I give them that.”
Hemy admitting he tried for years to find me shakes something loose inside me that I thought was long lost, but I must remain strong.
I suck in a breath as his body presses against mine. “Hemy.” I place my hand to his firm chest to block him from getting any closer. “Please,” I plead. “Don’t do this to me. It’s only going to get you hurt. I don’t want to hurt you. Don’t make me do it.” My eyes land on his lip ring as he bites it. Damn! I want to bite it too.
He takes a step back and untangles his hand from my hair before placing it against the wall so I’m completely blocked in. “You already have. You are right now, dammit. I can’t believe you didn’t tell me you were back. We were friends before we dated and you decided to throw that away as well. You left! You actually fucking left! ”
I try to concentrate on what he’s saying but him being so close is making it nearly impossible. I can’t think straight. Especially when I have a clear view of my name going down his side. It’s not only there, but it’s huge. It’s definitely there for show.
“When did you get my name on you?” I ask while staring at his naked torso. “Why? Why would you do that?”
He drops his arms and takes a step back. “I got it a year after you left. Why? I got it because I couldn’t get over you. And I’m still not.”
My mouth opens but I can’t speak. If I do then it will put me right where I don’t want to be. So instead, I just walk away.
“Onyx.” I keep going. “Fuck!”
I hear something crash as I walk down the stairs as calmly as I can and try to ignore the fact that Hemy is still into me. All I have to do is make it through this stupid party and then I’ll just pretend I never saw him. Pretend that seeing him doesn’t still take the breath straight from my lungs.
“There you are.” Ash appears at the bottom of the staircase looking up at me. Shit. Not good. She brushes her brown curls behind her ear. “Why did you run off? The party is just starting. These boys are so sexy. You need a dance from Stone.”
I reach for Ash’s arm and pull her around the corner just as Hemy starts walking down the steps. Today is definitely not the day for all this shit to happen. It’s too soon and I can’t be sure that Hemy has changed. I need to think of something fast.
I press Ash against the wall and force a smile. “Hey. I’m sorry. I was talking to Roman and he needs you to go into work. I would but I really have to be somewhere.” I brush her hair behind her ear and try to calm myself. “Is that okay? Would you mind going in? It’s Jade’s birthday and I-”
“Onyx,” she cuts in. “Of course I will go in. I could use the money anyways. No worries. I’ll leave now.”
She goes to walk away, but I grab her arm to stop her. “Thank you. I owe you.”
She flashes me her perfectly sweet smile. “You’ve already done enough for me. I’ll catch you later at home.”
I nod my head and lean against the wall as she walks outside. How the hell am I going to do this? I don’t know if I can.
Hemy appears around the corner with a frustrated scowl on his face. He looks around for a few seconds before his eyes find me. And when they do, they go soft for just a brief moment. “Don’t run away again. I can’t do this shit, Onyx.”
My eyes rake over his gorgeous, toned body before I pull my eyes away and walk toward the door. “I have to go. Just please go take care of Jade. Tell her I had to run out.”
I pull the door open and start heading for my Harley. I pull the ponytail holder from my wrist and wrap my hair in it before straddling my bike.
Of course that stubborn ass can’t listen and I feel his presence behind me once again. Hemy walks over with wide eyes as I grip the handle and start the engine. “You drive a motorcycle,” he says in disbelief. His eyes take in my ride before it finally dawns on him. “Is that my old Harley? You had it fixed up?”
I toss my helmet on and kick the stand up with my foot. “I fixed it.”
“Since when do you know how to work on motorcycles?”
I give him a stern look and rev the engine. “I learned from the best.” I rev the engine again and force a smile, fighting back my emotions. “Actually, I’ve learned a lot from the best.”
His jaw grinds as he watches me drive away. I don’t look back. I just drive, needing to escape.
Crap! Crap! Crap!
Chapter Four
Hemy
Onyx hasn’t left my mind once since last night, not that I tried very hard to forget her. After she rode off on my old motorcycle, all I wanted to do was chase after her. I fought so hard not to jump into my truck and chase her down. I know she needs time. I’m trying to respect that, but it’s been four damn years already. How much more time could she possibly need?
“Okay. You can do this,” I whisper. “He’s part of the past. He’s part of the past.” I try to convince myself but I suck at it. “Dammit.”
I stand up tall and take a deep breath before exhaling and pulling the bathroom door open. What I see in front of me causes my breath to be taken away . . . again.
Hemy is standing there still shirtless, just staring at the door as if he had been waiting for it to open.
“Onyx,” Hemy whispers. His eyes are soft and caring as they meet mine. Something in them looks different but I can’t tell what that means just yet. It’s like he’s looking at me with different eyes than before. It makes me want to believe he’s clean but I know that’s almost impossible. “We need to talk about us.”
“Hemy,” I breathe in frustration. I run my hands through my hair and close my eyes. “There is nothing to talk about. There hasn’t been an us in a very long time.”
I try to step around Hemy, but he places one arm against the wall, blocking me in. “There is an us. There always has been and you know it.” He stops and brings his eyes down to my lips. He licks his own and slides his free hand in the back of my hair. “I’ve missed you, Onyx. I’ve tried for the last four years to find you but your family are stubborn assholes. I’ve ended up at their doorstep once a month for the last four years. They’re definitely dedicated. I give them that.”
Hemy admitting he tried for years to find me shakes something loose inside me that I thought was long lost, but I must remain strong.
I suck in a breath as his body presses against mine. “Hemy.” I place my hand to his firm chest to block him from getting any closer. “Please,” I plead. “Don’t do this to me. It’s only going to get you hurt. I don’t want to hurt you. Don’t make me do it.” My eyes land on his lip ring as he bites it. Damn! I want to bite it too.
He takes a step back and untangles his hand from my hair before placing it against the wall so I’m completely blocked in. “You already have. You are right now, dammit. I can’t believe you didn’t tell me you were back. We were friends before we dated and you decided to throw that away as well. You left! You actually fucking left! ”
I try to concentrate on what he’s saying but him being so close is making it nearly impossible. I can’t think straight. Especially when I have a clear view of my name going down his side. It’s not only there, but it’s huge. It’s definitely there for show.
“When did you get my name on you?” I ask while staring at his naked torso. “Why? Why would you do that?”
He drops his arms and takes a step back. “I got it a year after you left. Why? I got it because I couldn’t get over you. And I’m still not.”
My mouth opens but I can’t speak. If I do then it will put me right where I don’t want to be. So instead, I just walk away.
“Onyx.” I keep going. “Fuck!”
I hear something crash as I walk down the stairs as calmly as I can and try to ignore the fact that Hemy is still into me. All I have to do is make it through this stupid party and then I’ll just pretend I never saw him. Pretend that seeing him doesn’t still take the breath straight from my lungs.
“There you are.” Ash appears at the bottom of the staircase looking up at me. Shit. Not good. She brushes her brown curls behind her ear. “Why did you run off? The party is just starting. These boys are so sexy. You need a dance from Stone.”
I reach for Ash’s arm and pull her around the corner just as Hemy starts walking down the steps. Today is definitely not the day for all this shit to happen. It’s too soon and I can’t be sure that Hemy has changed. I need to think of something fast.
I press Ash against the wall and force a smile. “Hey. I’m sorry. I was talking to Roman and he needs you to go into work. I would but I really have to be somewhere.” I brush her hair behind her ear and try to calm myself. “Is that okay? Would you mind going in? It’s Jade’s birthday and I-”
“Onyx,” she cuts in. “Of course I will go in. I could use the money anyways. No worries. I’ll leave now.”
She goes to walk away, but I grab her arm to stop her. “Thank you. I owe you.”
She flashes me her perfectly sweet smile. “You’ve already done enough for me. I’ll catch you later at home.”
I nod my head and lean against the wall as she walks outside. How the hell am I going to do this? I don’t know if I can.
Hemy appears around the corner with a frustrated scowl on his face. He looks around for a few seconds before his eyes find me. And when they do, they go soft for just a brief moment. “Don’t run away again. I can’t do this shit, Onyx.”
My eyes rake over his gorgeous, toned body before I pull my eyes away and walk toward the door. “I have to go. Just please go take care of Jade. Tell her I had to run out.”
I pull the door open and start heading for my Harley. I pull the ponytail holder from my wrist and wrap my hair in it before straddling my bike.
Of course that stubborn ass can’t listen and I feel his presence behind me once again. Hemy walks over with wide eyes as I grip the handle and start the engine. “You drive a motorcycle,” he says in disbelief. His eyes take in my ride before it finally dawns on him. “Is that my old Harley? You had it fixed up?”
I toss my helmet on and kick the stand up with my foot. “I fixed it.”
“Since when do you know how to work on motorcycles?”
I give him a stern look and rev the engine. “I learned from the best.” I rev the engine again and force a smile, fighting back my emotions. “Actually, I’ve learned a lot from the best.”
His jaw grinds as he watches me drive away. I don’t look back. I just drive, needing to escape.
Crap! Crap! Crap!
Chapter Four
Hemy
Onyx hasn’t left my mind once since last night, not that I tried very hard to forget her. After she rode off on my old motorcycle, all I wanted to do was chase after her. I fought so hard not to jump into my truck and chase her down. I know she needs time. I’m trying to respect that, but it’s been four damn years already. How much more time could she possibly need?
