Hideaway
Page 58

“You’re the girl I didn’t know, and we could be anyone in that confessional. Everything else fell away. Everything. We could hide and fuck with the world in that little room. It was just us.”
I closed my eyes, exhaustion seizing me.
All those years ago. That wasn’t really me, was it?
I relaxed into him, unable to find the will to fight.
I almost remember being her. Back when I still hoped there were possibilities. When I thought there was some way I could have him and have the fun things that normal girls had. When I let myself crave those stolen kisses and his eyes on me; imagining him wanting things a man wanted from a woman and wanting them from me.
My lungs burned, and I sucked in a breath, realizing I’d forgotten to breathe. God, all that need flooded back, washing over me and heating up my skin. I’d starved myself dry, and I suddenly felt like nothing but bones so weak I could break. I was so hungry.
I turned my head, meeting his gaze an inch from mine. His fingers relaxed in my hair, while I stared into his dark pools, my mind too foggy to think.
“Hold my eyes,” he said softly. “Just keep looking at me.”
I did. I just dived and surrendered and fell.
The confessional.
We were back in the confessional. We were younger, and it was no one but us. Tucked away, safe.
I was safe.
His hand between my legs started to move, rubbing back and forth so gentle and slow. “No one sees us,” he breathed out. “There’s no one but you and me. We’re invisible. We don’t exist.”
I nodded weakly, but my lids started to droop with the sensation of his caresses. Oh, God.
“Keep your eyes on me, baby,” he told me.
I blinked several times, refocusing as his hand drifted up, running over my stomach. His touch sent shivers down my arms, and I moaned, struggling to hold his eyes as his hand came to my breast. He cupped it, kneading so softly and taunting me.
I caught him glance at my chest, his mouth open and his gaze thick with hunger like he wanted what was in his hand in his mouth instead.
Licking my lips, I felt him move to my other breast, fondling the nipple until that one, too, had tightened into a pebble. Butterflies swarmed in my belly, and I started to feel the pulse in my clit throb, wanting his hand back there now.
His fingers dug lightly into my skin, running back down my torso and stomach, sending shocks out of every pore on my body as he grabbed me a little harder between the thighs this time.
I closed my eyes and arched my back, feeling his erection pulse under me. “Kai…”
Every touch, every breath heightened the weightlessness taking over my body. I was floating, the room was spinning, and I didn’t want to get off the ride.
Turning my head, I parted my lips, searching for his.
His teeth caught my bottom lip, dragging it out tauntingly.
“This is what it should’ve been,” he told me. “It wouldn’t have hurt so much if I’d gotten you ready first. I’m sorry. I should’ve gone slowly.”
Opening my eyes, I looked up at him. Instinct told me to bolt. Tuck back into my shell and stay in the darkness.
But I wasn’t Banks tonight. He wasn’t Kai, and we weren’t here. None of this was happening.
“So, go slow with me then,” I whispered.
He only hesitated a moment before sliding out from under me and laying me down on the bed. I immediately raised my arms to cover myself, a golf ball in my throat and my heart palpitating.
I wanted him, but I was still shy. No one had ever seen me naked.
Life had gotten a hell of lot more complicated in the last ten minutes.
He wasn’t looking anywhere but in my eyes as he came to hover over me.
“I want you.” He gently pulled my arms down.
His stare bore into me as he ran his hand up the center of my torso, gliding between my breasts to my neck. He dived down, covering my nipple with his mouth, and I threw my head back, moaning. “Kai,” I said again.
I placed my hands on his arms as he held himself up with one hand and used the other to grope the breast he was kissing. His hot mouth sucked on the tight, hard skin, drawing the nipple out and then going in for more before he began moving around all over.
I shuddered. “That feels so good.”
He quickly switched over to the other one, leaving his hand where it was and keeping me warm.
He trailed down my stomach, and I shivered, fisting my fingers in his hair.
“Open your legs,” he said huskily.
I lifted up my head, and my eyes instantly fell between his legs, seeing him hard and thick. “Uh,” I whimpered. “No.”
Without looking up, he descended lower and lifted up my leg by the back of the knee. “Gotta get you ready, babe.”
He dipped his head between my legs, burying his mouth, and I tried to push him off. “No, don’t do that—”
But with the subtle flick of his tongue, my eyelids suddenly felt so heavy.
He swirled around just above the hood, rubbing me with his mouth as his hand circled my thigh, holding it up, and his body settled in between my thighs.
Licking and nibbling, his assault was soft at first, sending my stomach reeling and fireworks shooting down my legs. I felt like I was on a swing twenty stories up, leaning back with my hair flying in the air.
I wanted more. Deeper.
Then he started sucking. Everything. In, out, and around, kissing my skin down there and still kneading my breast with one hand. I lifted up my head, watching him.
“You’re so fucking tight down here,” he panted, gently biting me. “But you’re going to stretch. I promise.”
I bit my lip as he looked up at me.
“Do you like this?” he asked, licking me up and down slowly.
My cheeks heated with a blush, and a small smile crossed his face.
“Or this?” He watched me as he swirled his tongue around my clit over and over again.
I lost my breath, my eyelids fluttering.
He grinned, taunting me. “Or maybe this?”
And then he covered my clit with his lips and sucked strong, pulling and tugging, the heat of his mouth torture as I arched off the bed and groaned. “Ah,” I moaned breathlessly.
“So beautiful,” he whispered. “Are you ready, kid?”
My stomach quivered with anticipation, and I wasn’t even annoyed he called me “kid” again. For this one time, it sounded endearing.
I nodded, slipping my hand into his hair. I wasn’t sure what I was ready for other than just more. I just wanted more.
Coming up, he kissed me, working my mouth open and dipping his tongue inside. I groaned, my body taking over as I grabbed his hips and parted my legs, lifting up my knees and letting him in.
My nipples brushed his chest, and I pushed up, kissing him back with full force. His smell, his skin, his taste…in this moment, I was new.
Kneeling over me, he reached down between us and positioned himself at my opening. The tip pushed inside, and the tight burn immediately made me freeze up again.
“It hurts.” Every muscle tightened up, and I was afraid to move.
“Look at me,” he said.
I raised my shaky eyes, staring at the flat spot on his bottom lip.
“Bend your knees more,” he told me.
I did, my fingers curling into his hips.
“Now, relax your thighs,” he instructed. “Spread ’em wide and let them fall to the bed, okay? Open for me. Just open.”
I laid down my thighs, knees bent and spread for him.
He pushed a little more, and I sucked in a breath, but I didn’t try to stop him. He paused himself and leaned down, whispering over my lips. “You’re torturing me. I just want to sink into you so bad.”
“It’s not in yet?”
He shook with a laugh. “Not all the way. Does it still hurt?”
I was about to say yes. It was definitely uncomfortable, but…I guess it didn’t really hurt.
I shook my head.
Looking into my eyes, he slowly sank deeper, and I started to feel stretched and full and kind of strange.
“How about now?”
“I…I don’t…” I stammered, adjusting to him. “I don’t know.”
He thrust all the way in, bottoming out, and hit me so deep, my eyes rolled back. Oh, shit.