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Slowly, he started to turn over, and with shaking limbs, got himself up on his knees and sat there on his heels, looking like he barely had enough strength to hold his head up. Water cascaded down his face, making his black hair hang over his eyes, and I knew I couldn’t ever not love him. Bleeding, broken, lost, and alone, he was back up, wasn’t he? He would always be able to take whatever anyone did to him. Twist it. Turn it. Swallow it.
Kai approached, and I followed. He knelt down, staring at my brother.
“We didn’t choose Rika over you,” he told him calmly. “Or Banks.” He leaned in, his tone firm. “You left us.”
Will watched Damon out of the corner of his eye, anger still raging through his eyes but they glistened, too.
Kai stood up. “Where is the body?”
Rika and Michael inched closer, and I watched Damon take a deep breath. “Gone,” he said.
Kai bent down and grabbed the top of his head by the hair. “Where?”
Damon raised his eyes, almost amused. “You didn’t kill her.”
I stepped toward him, and Kai let him go, straightening.
“What?” I asked.
“She was fine when you and Kai left the hotel.”
“How do I know you’re telling the truth?” Kai demanded.
“Because she was breathing when you left, wasn’t she?”
“Well, where is she, then?” I asked. She’d need money at some point. It was too long for no one to have seen or heard from her.
“I need proof she’s okay,” Kai told him. “I still hurt her.”
“No, she was hurting us.” Damon pushed himself to his feet, struggling to square his shoulders. “And you stopped her. End of story.”
“So, she was fine when I left the hotel?” Kai challenged him. “Was she fine when you left the hotel?”
Damon held Kai’s eyes, giving nothing away as the silence stretched between them, and I knew…I just knew…
She was dead.
That night wasn’t over when Kai and I left The Pope.
“Kai!” Alex shouted. “Oh, my God, hurry!”
We all spun around, spotting her inside the house, across the kitchen, and looking down the hallway.
She turned her worried eyes back to us. “Where’s the fire extinguisher?”
We all shot off. Running back into the house, I raced through the kitchen, feeling Kai’s hand take mine. We left Damon outside, and I knew that he’d run. A big part of me hoped he would.
Alex stood in the foyer, looking toward the sitting room, and Michael, Rika, Kai, and I rushed up to her, seeing the black drape crawling with flames. A small tree had crashed through the window, glass and rain covering the floor.
“The candles,” Kai breathed. “Shit!”
I glanced at the floor, and sure enough, the fallen tree had knocked the candles onto the floor, causing the drapes to catch fire.
Kai pointed at Will. “Closet!” And all of them, including Michael, ran back down the hallway, swinging open the closet door and diving inside for the extinguishers.
I raced into the sitting room, seeing the flames spread up the curtain, and then I noticed the shanais hanging on the wall next to the window.
“Rika!” I called, running over and grabbing one off the wall.
The heat of the flames stung my eyes, and rain hit my arm as I reached up again, pulling another sword off the wall. I choked on the tears stuck in my throat.
He’d already lost the dojo. I couldn’t let this happen again.
Rika worked with me, pulling everything off the wall and tossing it to one of the couches.
“No!” I heard Kai yell. “Banks, stay back!”
He ran in and grabbed my arm, yanking me behind him. “Put out the rest of the candles!”
The flames spread across the valance, and I rushed over to blow out the other tapers just in case the wind blew any more onto the floor.
Michael and Will ran in, Michael darting his horrified eyes toward us.
“Rika!” he shouted.
And I twisted around. A piece of the fabric hanging above, consumed in flames, spilled down, hanging by threads. She followed his gaze, looking up, and he shot off, hurrying for her. Suddenly, the gold rod broke, spilling down from the wall, and everything went in slow motion. The drapes, ablaze, came crashing down, and everyone reached out for her, but just then, she was grabbed by the shirt, hauled backward, away from the flames, and sent tumbling to the hardwood floor at the center of the room. She crashed onto her back, wincing out of fear or pain, I wasn’t sure.
And I looked up and saw Damon. I hadn’t even seen him enter.
Rika blinked a few times, the wind knocked out of her as Michael dived down and pulled her up.
“Jesus Christ,” he gasped, holding her face. “You okay?”
She seemed stunned, just trying to catch her breath. Then she looked over, and so did I, Damon standing there with his jaw clenched.
Everyone was momentarily frozen, piecing together what the hell had just happened, but Kai turned back to the flames, and pointed the nozzle at the window. He and Will sprayed the extinguisher up, down, and over, the bright, hot flames quickly turning to smoke, Will coughing as the fire was put out.
I exhaled, trying to catch my breath.
They set the tanks down, all of us just stood there, tired, confused, angry, or whatever. I looked over to Alex. She had a hand on her chest, breathing hard, while Michael stood in front of Rika, both of them not saying anything.
Will fell down on the couch, resting his head in his hands, and Kai…Kai turned his eyes on Damon finally.
“You think we won’t call the police?” he threatened. “You should’ve run.”
“I’m not running,” Damon said, staring at the wall. “Call them.”
I swallowed, pain stretching my throat. I knew Kai was looking at me. What could I say? Please, don’t.
My father won’t let Damon go back to prison. He’ll send him somewhere where he can’t embarrass him again, and he’ll keep him there, out of sight, for however long it takes for Damon to get a hold of himself.
If I were Kai, I’d know Damon deserved to suffer. I’d know what I needed to do for the safety of my friends and family.
But I wasn’t Kai.
I closed my eyes, my chin trembling. I was too close to the situation. My heart couldn’t bear to see him suffer anymore.
“Rika?” Kai said, coming up to me and threading his fingers through mine. “Michael? Will? You guys do what you need to do. I can’t deal with this now.”
He pressed his lips into my temple. I couldn’t ask any of them to just let him go, but I was grateful Kai stood with me.
No one spoke, and I opened my eyes to see Rika look away from Damon. There was anger in her eyes, but also conflict.
And confusion. He had just saved her from getting hurt or worse.
And what had he whispered to her before the guys showed up?
“Don’t get confused,” Damon told her. “I’m not a good guy. Call the police.”
Michael turned, looking ready to hit him, but Rika pulled him back. “Get the fuck out,” she growled to Damon. And then she turned away, breathing so hard her anger looked ready to spill over.
Damon cast me a look, and there was so much I wanted to say.
But we both knew he had to get out of here before she changed her mind.
He walked out, and I heard the front door swing open, the sound of the rain pouring in.
What if I never saw him again? Damon was all I had for so long. Everything was new now. My home, my days, even my clothes…I exhaled, pain twisting my stomach.
I ran out of the room and out the front door. “Damon!”
Tears streamed down my face, and I could barely see him through the blur in my eyes. But I saw his dark form stop and slowly turn around. Blood had dried around his eye, but the rain had washed most of it away.
“Did you ever love me?” I asked.
He slowly approached me, staring hard. “Love is pain, Nik,” he told me. “It’s never felt good.”
“Not even my love?”
He dropped his eyes, shaking his head. “I don’t want to hurt you. Anymore,” he added. “That’s all I know.”
Kai approached, and I followed. He knelt down, staring at my brother.
“We didn’t choose Rika over you,” he told him calmly. “Or Banks.” He leaned in, his tone firm. “You left us.”
Will watched Damon out of the corner of his eye, anger still raging through his eyes but they glistened, too.
Kai stood up. “Where is the body?”
Rika and Michael inched closer, and I watched Damon take a deep breath. “Gone,” he said.
Kai bent down and grabbed the top of his head by the hair. “Where?”
Damon raised his eyes, almost amused. “You didn’t kill her.”
I stepped toward him, and Kai let him go, straightening.
“What?” I asked.
“She was fine when you and Kai left the hotel.”
“How do I know you’re telling the truth?” Kai demanded.
“Because she was breathing when you left, wasn’t she?”
“Well, where is she, then?” I asked. She’d need money at some point. It was too long for no one to have seen or heard from her.
“I need proof she’s okay,” Kai told him. “I still hurt her.”
“No, she was hurting us.” Damon pushed himself to his feet, struggling to square his shoulders. “And you stopped her. End of story.”
“So, she was fine when I left the hotel?” Kai challenged him. “Was she fine when you left the hotel?”
Damon held Kai’s eyes, giving nothing away as the silence stretched between them, and I knew…I just knew…
She was dead.
That night wasn’t over when Kai and I left The Pope.
“Kai!” Alex shouted. “Oh, my God, hurry!”
We all spun around, spotting her inside the house, across the kitchen, and looking down the hallway.
She turned her worried eyes back to us. “Where’s the fire extinguisher?”
We all shot off. Running back into the house, I raced through the kitchen, feeling Kai’s hand take mine. We left Damon outside, and I knew that he’d run. A big part of me hoped he would.
Alex stood in the foyer, looking toward the sitting room, and Michael, Rika, Kai, and I rushed up to her, seeing the black drape crawling with flames. A small tree had crashed through the window, glass and rain covering the floor.
“The candles,” Kai breathed. “Shit!”
I glanced at the floor, and sure enough, the fallen tree had knocked the candles onto the floor, causing the drapes to catch fire.
Kai pointed at Will. “Closet!” And all of them, including Michael, ran back down the hallway, swinging open the closet door and diving inside for the extinguishers.
I raced into the sitting room, seeing the flames spread up the curtain, and then I noticed the shanais hanging on the wall next to the window.
“Rika!” I called, running over and grabbing one off the wall.
The heat of the flames stung my eyes, and rain hit my arm as I reached up again, pulling another sword off the wall. I choked on the tears stuck in my throat.
He’d already lost the dojo. I couldn’t let this happen again.
Rika worked with me, pulling everything off the wall and tossing it to one of the couches.
“No!” I heard Kai yell. “Banks, stay back!”
He ran in and grabbed my arm, yanking me behind him. “Put out the rest of the candles!”
The flames spread across the valance, and I rushed over to blow out the other tapers just in case the wind blew any more onto the floor.
Michael and Will ran in, Michael darting his horrified eyes toward us.
“Rika!” he shouted.
And I twisted around. A piece of the fabric hanging above, consumed in flames, spilled down, hanging by threads. She followed his gaze, looking up, and he shot off, hurrying for her. Suddenly, the gold rod broke, spilling down from the wall, and everything went in slow motion. The drapes, ablaze, came crashing down, and everyone reached out for her, but just then, she was grabbed by the shirt, hauled backward, away from the flames, and sent tumbling to the hardwood floor at the center of the room. She crashed onto her back, wincing out of fear or pain, I wasn’t sure.
And I looked up and saw Damon. I hadn’t even seen him enter.
Rika blinked a few times, the wind knocked out of her as Michael dived down and pulled her up.
“Jesus Christ,” he gasped, holding her face. “You okay?”
She seemed stunned, just trying to catch her breath. Then she looked over, and so did I, Damon standing there with his jaw clenched.
Everyone was momentarily frozen, piecing together what the hell had just happened, but Kai turned back to the flames, and pointed the nozzle at the window. He and Will sprayed the extinguisher up, down, and over, the bright, hot flames quickly turning to smoke, Will coughing as the fire was put out.
I exhaled, trying to catch my breath.
They set the tanks down, all of us just stood there, tired, confused, angry, or whatever. I looked over to Alex. She had a hand on her chest, breathing hard, while Michael stood in front of Rika, both of them not saying anything.
Will fell down on the couch, resting his head in his hands, and Kai…Kai turned his eyes on Damon finally.
“You think we won’t call the police?” he threatened. “You should’ve run.”
“I’m not running,” Damon said, staring at the wall. “Call them.”
I swallowed, pain stretching my throat. I knew Kai was looking at me. What could I say? Please, don’t.
My father won’t let Damon go back to prison. He’ll send him somewhere where he can’t embarrass him again, and he’ll keep him there, out of sight, for however long it takes for Damon to get a hold of himself.
If I were Kai, I’d know Damon deserved to suffer. I’d know what I needed to do for the safety of my friends and family.
But I wasn’t Kai.
I closed my eyes, my chin trembling. I was too close to the situation. My heart couldn’t bear to see him suffer anymore.
“Rika?” Kai said, coming up to me and threading his fingers through mine. “Michael? Will? You guys do what you need to do. I can’t deal with this now.”
He pressed his lips into my temple. I couldn’t ask any of them to just let him go, but I was grateful Kai stood with me.
No one spoke, and I opened my eyes to see Rika look away from Damon. There was anger in her eyes, but also conflict.
And confusion. He had just saved her from getting hurt or worse.
And what had he whispered to her before the guys showed up?
“Don’t get confused,” Damon told her. “I’m not a good guy. Call the police.”
Michael turned, looking ready to hit him, but Rika pulled him back. “Get the fuck out,” she growled to Damon. And then she turned away, breathing so hard her anger looked ready to spill over.
Damon cast me a look, and there was so much I wanted to say.
But we both knew he had to get out of here before she changed her mind.
He walked out, and I heard the front door swing open, the sound of the rain pouring in.
What if I never saw him again? Damon was all I had for so long. Everything was new now. My home, my days, even my clothes…I exhaled, pain twisting my stomach.
I ran out of the room and out the front door. “Damon!”
Tears streamed down my face, and I could barely see him through the blur in my eyes. But I saw his dark form stop and slowly turn around. Blood had dried around his eye, but the rain had washed most of it away.
“Did you ever love me?” I asked.
He slowly approached me, staring hard. “Love is pain, Nik,” he told me. “It’s never felt good.”
“Not even my love?”
He dropped his eyes, shaking his head. “I don’t want to hurt you. Anymore,” he added. “That’s all I know.”