If I Die
Page 85

 Rachel Vincent

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Its more complicated than that. He was hurting. And anyway, it was the frost, I insisted. No matter how mad he got at me and Tod, he wouldnt have done something like that if hed been clean. I was absolutely certain of that.
Tod was unconvinced. It was him on frost.
Is he okay? Em asked, settling into her chair again.
Sabine and my mom seem to have it under control, at least for the moment, Tod said. But I dont think we should count on either of them for backup tonight.
So, what, its just the three of us? Em asked, and I was relieved to hear a tremor of fear in her voice. The real trouble would come later, when Beck unleashed his charm on her again, and she forgot to be afraid.
What, you dont think I can protect you? I said, only half kidding as I ducked into the living room to grab my laptop from my backpack.
I dont doubt your bean sidhe skills, Kaylee. Emma leaned back in her chair to see me around the kitchen doorway. I just dont see how theyre going to be any good against an incubus. I mean, we dont even know how to fight him, short of a good hard kick to the groin.
You cant go wrong with that, Tod mumbled, looking distinctly uncomfortable at the thought.
Except that by the time its time to kick him, thats the last thing youre going to want to do. Which is where this comes in. I set my laptop on the kitchen peninsula and turned it on. So far, we havent had much luck fighting Netherworld evil with tips from the internet, but Alec says that because they need humans to breed with, as well as to feed from, incubi have a long, and presumably well-documented history in our world. And I was hoping that at least some of that history had made its way to the web.
Ooh, I have mine, too, so I can double our efforts. Emma claimed the second bar stool and plugged her laptop in next to mine. While we searched with Google like madwomen, Tod stood behind us where he could see both screens, reading and pointing out anything he thought might be useful.
Is this chick for real? Emma asked, about ten minutes into the research, and I leaned over to glance at her screen. She claims shes been communicating with demons that appear and disappear at night in her room since she was a kid, but now shes tired of them and wants to know how to get rid of them.
Antipsychotic medication, Tod suggested, scowling at the screen. The internet is full of crackpots claiming to have personal contact with demons who bear no resemblance to any Netherworld creature Ive ever heard of, except for hellions. And if hellions could cross the barrier into your bedroom, wed have bigger things to worry about than one horny incubus.
I wish you wouldnt throw that word around like its harmless, I said, elbowing him in the ribs.
Horny? Tod grinned.
Emma laughed. She means crackpot.
Just because someone talks to things other people cant see or hear doesntmean those things arent there, and it doesnt necessarily mean shes crazy, I insisted. She could just be having a series of bad dreams.
The reapers brows rose in amusement over my automatic defense of the mentally unstable. Or, she could have an over-active imagination and a pathological need to be the center of attention. With all due respect to those whove unjustly served time in mental institutions, people who are really hearing and seeing things they shouldnt either go crazyin which case a coherent internet plea for help would be improbableor they keep quiet about their so-called delusions to avoid looking crazy.
Tod spun my stool so that I faced him, then looked straight into my eyes, so I could see sincerity swirling in his. You are none of the above, Kaylee, so you can quit worrying about that. But just because youre not crazy or looking for attention doesnt mean that he glanced at Emmas screen, then back at me DemonQueen87 is in possession of all her marbles.
Okay, valid point, I said, when I couldnt find fault with his logic. So, did DemonQueen get any advice we could use? Just because her problem was probably bogus didnt mean all the answers would be.
Yeah, I dont think so. Em scrolled slowly, reading aloud as her finger slid down the mouse pad. Banishing incantations
Bullshit, Tod declared, rolling bright blue eyes. Even if that wasnt a bunch of mumbo jumbo nonsense, incantations wouldnt work against something with a physical presence. You cant fight evil by chanting a few magic words.
Religious rituals Em continued, without even looking up for his rant. Ceremony conducted by the high priest of a Wiccan church or aMagickian? She looked up from the screen, frowning. Is that even a real word?
Dunno. I shrugged. Do Wiccans have high priests?
I have no idea. Emma leaned over to glance at my screen. You having any better luck?
Not unless you believe that sleeping with scissors under your pillow will prevent midnight ninja incubus attacks.
Thats superstitious nonsense. Tod sank into one of the kitchen chairs, looking more frustrated than Id ever seen him. A long time ago, people used to blame fictional incarnations of incubi to cover up an affair or pregnancy out of wedlock. It was this whole, I was raped by a demon defense that absolved the victim of guilt and gave everyone something intangible to blame. That created this whole legend of ethereal demons that could seduce people in their sleep, like some version of a mara who would molest you instead of scaring you, thus tempting you to damn your own soul by committing sinful acts of sex. Unfortunately, that means that all the methods of fighting these demons that come out of that era assume that the incubus has no true physical form.