Jake Understood
Page 19
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When she pointed out that I had some blood on my mouth, instead of wiping it with something, I intentionally licked it off as she watched every movement of my tongue slide across my lip. I swallowed it. I wanted her in a primal way, and I guess this was my way of expressing that, even though I wouldn’t consider acting on it in other ways.
Still, I realized that wasn’t a normal manner of showing it. It was a complete loss of control, forever referred to in my mind as the “vampire incident.”
***
The second major setback was what began the process of my complete undoing when it came to Nina.
It was a Friday, and as usual, my bag was packed and ready to go with me at work for the weekend trip to Boston.
I normally hopped a train after my shift ended, but that entire day, thoughts of Nina would not stop invading my brain. I started convincing myself that being friends with her would be better than nothing, especially since I couldn’t seem to stay away from her.
Maybe we could be friends.
Famous last words.
I wanted so much to stay the weekend and just spend time with her.
That night, as I was walking to the train station, I impulsively turned around and headed back to the apartment, deciding to take an early Saturday morning train instead so that we could hang out. I would ask her if she wanted to go out and eat or rent a movie. Those were harmless things, right?
I loved lying to myself, apparently.
Dropping my travel bag by the apartment door, I made my way down the hall. Nina’s bedroom door was open, and she was standing there looking at herself in the full-length mirror attached to her closet.
My jaw dropped, and my heart pounded as I took her in. A tight dress hugged her voluptuous body. Her hair was cascading down her back in beautiful long curls that almost reached the top of her amazing ass.
She was wearing stripper heels. Nina looked like she’d been kidnapped and done up by a tribe of whores.
It was the hottest fucking thing I’d ever seen in my entire life.
She hadn’t noticed me just outside the door, so I moved in closer. Her dress was bright purple, and I decided to make a dumb joke about it since telling her what I was really thinking might have gotten me arrested. “Nina, Barney the dinosaur called. He wants his skin back.”
She flinched when she saw my reflection in the mirror. “Jake! What are you doing here? You’re supposed to be on your way to Boston.”
“Nice to see you, too.”
“Well, it’s just that you usually leave from work and—”
I lied to her. “I missed the 5:15 Amtrak, so I might either catch the last train at 9:30 or just go in the morning.”
“Oh.”
She seemed absolutely shocked to see me and quite uncomfortable. Then, she turned around.
She turned around.
Fuck.
My eyes unapologetically went where they needed to go. The dress had a plunging neckline that showed way too much of her massive cleavage. While the back view looked hot, the front view was downright indecent. My throat seemed to freeze. I knew I should have said something but couldn’t find the words. No other woman had so much as crossed my mind sexually since Nina entered my life. My earlier conclusion that staying friends was a good idea now seemed ludicrous as I stood there taking her in and praying away my erection. I sure had been lying to myself. My mouth was watering for fuck’s sake. The truth was…I was starving for her. Only her.
The way her chest was heaving as I looked at her, the way she always reacted to me made me feel like she wanted me that way, too.
I forced myself to speak. “Nina…you look—”
“Interesting?” She smiled in an attempt to lighten mood.
My hungry eyes travelled slowly downward, taking in her tits and the way the material of her dress clung to her taut stomach. Her bare legs looked longer in heels. “That’s one way of putting it.”
Our eyes met again. She could tell where my mind was. Hell, it couldn’t have been more obvious.
“Jake!”
I turned around to see our roommate, Tarah, enter the room but quickly returned my gaze back to Nina.
“Tarah!” I said, mimicking her shocked tone of voice. Understandably, everyone seemed so surprised to see me here on a Friday night. It dawned on me that maybe they were getting ready to go out on a girls’ night.
Would it have been wrong to invite myself?
I plopped down on Nina’s bed and joked, “I didn’t know we were going out tonight, Nina.”
“We…are not going anywhere,” Tarah said. “She is going on a date.”
It was like my world stopped spinning when she said it.
My head and ears began to throb as jealousy hit me like a ton of bricks.
Get your shit together, Jake.
I couldn’t.
It was impossible to pretend that this news wasn’t wrecking me. As much as I’d tried to distance myself, as much as I knew Nina could never accept my life if she knew the truth…in my heart, I believed she was mine. Mine. It was the first time the realization of that deluded misconception really hit me.
The only words that would come out of my mouth were, “I see.” My hands formed into fists to ward off the anger building inside me. “I suppose he’s taking you to the Vegas Strip in that outfit?”
Tarah said something, but I didn’t even hear it because I was too busy staring at Nina, this time into her eyes. I wanted to carry her in my arms back to my room and cover her with my body. I had no right to feel this way and knew I needed to leave before I made a total fool of myself since I apparently couldn’t hide my jealousy. This had honestly never happened to me before. Maybe if I’d had a chance to practice this reaction when I was thirteen, I wouldn’t have been acting like a teenager right now.
Still, I realized that wasn’t a normal manner of showing it. It was a complete loss of control, forever referred to in my mind as the “vampire incident.”
***
The second major setback was what began the process of my complete undoing when it came to Nina.
It was a Friday, and as usual, my bag was packed and ready to go with me at work for the weekend trip to Boston.
I normally hopped a train after my shift ended, but that entire day, thoughts of Nina would not stop invading my brain. I started convincing myself that being friends with her would be better than nothing, especially since I couldn’t seem to stay away from her.
Maybe we could be friends.
Famous last words.
I wanted so much to stay the weekend and just spend time with her.
That night, as I was walking to the train station, I impulsively turned around and headed back to the apartment, deciding to take an early Saturday morning train instead so that we could hang out. I would ask her if she wanted to go out and eat or rent a movie. Those were harmless things, right?
I loved lying to myself, apparently.
Dropping my travel bag by the apartment door, I made my way down the hall. Nina’s bedroom door was open, and she was standing there looking at herself in the full-length mirror attached to her closet.
My jaw dropped, and my heart pounded as I took her in. A tight dress hugged her voluptuous body. Her hair was cascading down her back in beautiful long curls that almost reached the top of her amazing ass.
She was wearing stripper heels. Nina looked like she’d been kidnapped and done up by a tribe of whores.
It was the hottest fucking thing I’d ever seen in my entire life.
She hadn’t noticed me just outside the door, so I moved in closer. Her dress was bright purple, and I decided to make a dumb joke about it since telling her what I was really thinking might have gotten me arrested. “Nina, Barney the dinosaur called. He wants his skin back.”
She flinched when she saw my reflection in the mirror. “Jake! What are you doing here? You’re supposed to be on your way to Boston.”
“Nice to see you, too.”
“Well, it’s just that you usually leave from work and—”
I lied to her. “I missed the 5:15 Amtrak, so I might either catch the last train at 9:30 or just go in the morning.”
“Oh.”
She seemed absolutely shocked to see me and quite uncomfortable. Then, she turned around.
She turned around.
Fuck.
My eyes unapologetically went where they needed to go. The dress had a plunging neckline that showed way too much of her massive cleavage. While the back view looked hot, the front view was downright indecent. My throat seemed to freeze. I knew I should have said something but couldn’t find the words. No other woman had so much as crossed my mind sexually since Nina entered my life. My earlier conclusion that staying friends was a good idea now seemed ludicrous as I stood there taking her in and praying away my erection. I sure had been lying to myself. My mouth was watering for fuck’s sake. The truth was…I was starving for her. Only her.
The way her chest was heaving as I looked at her, the way she always reacted to me made me feel like she wanted me that way, too.
I forced myself to speak. “Nina…you look—”
“Interesting?” She smiled in an attempt to lighten mood.
My hungry eyes travelled slowly downward, taking in her tits and the way the material of her dress clung to her taut stomach. Her bare legs looked longer in heels. “That’s one way of putting it.”
Our eyes met again. She could tell where my mind was. Hell, it couldn’t have been more obvious.
“Jake!”
I turned around to see our roommate, Tarah, enter the room but quickly returned my gaze back to Nina.
“Tarah!” I said, mimicking her shocked tone of voice. Understandably, everyone seemed so surprised to see me here on a Friday night. It dawned on me that maybe they were getting ready to go out on a girls’ night.
Would it have been wrong to invite myself?
I plopped down on Nina’s bed and joked, “I didn’t know we were going out tonight, Nina.”
“We…are not going anywhere,” Tarah said. “She is going on a date.”
It was like my world stopped spinning when she said it.
My head and ears began to throb as jealousy hit me like a ton of bricks.
Get your shit together, Jake.
I couldn’t.
It was impossible to pretend that this news wasn’t wrecking me. As much as I’d tried to distance myself, as much as I knew Nina could never accept my life if she knew the truth…in my heart, I believed she was mine. Mine. It was the first time the realization of that deluded misconception really hit me.
The only words that would come out of my mouth were, “I see.” My hands formed into fists to ward off the anger building inside me. “I suppose he’s taking you to the Vegas Strip in that outfit?”
Tarah said something, but I didn’t even hear it because I was too busy staring at Nina, this time into her eyes. I wanted to carry her in my arms back to my room and cover her with my body. I had no right to feel this way and knew I needed to leave before I made a total fool of myself since I apparently couldn’t hide my jealousy. This had honestly never happened to me before. Maybe if I’d had a chance to practice this reaction when I was thirteen, I wouldn’t have been acting like a teenager right now.
