Knox's Stand
Page 43

“I try.” He tried to appear humble, though somehow Diamond had a feeling this man had plenty of confidence.
Diamond motioned for him to have a seat on the chair by the window as she walked over to take the other one. Pastor Dean followed her to the seating area, pausing before he sat down to look out the window.
“You have quite a view of my church.”
Diamond nodded. “It can be a pain sometimes when I’m thinking of billing my customers for an extra hour and look outside to see the church; keeps me from padding the bills,” Diamond said wryly.
“I have a good view also. Perhaps we should learn a signal. I could signal you when I have a parishioner that wants to stay forever and you could signal me when you have a client you can’t get rid of,” he joked.
“Don’t temp me; I’ve had several of those.”
“I noticed Knox coming by several weeks ago, but he hasn’t been around for a while, why is that?” Pastor Dean inquired.
Diamond was surprised that he’d bluntly let her know he had noticed Knox coming into her office as well as his question. “His case was dropped, so there wasn’t any need for him to come around anymore.”
Pastor Dean nodded his head. “I was glad to hear it. Knox and I were in the service together,” he explained.
“You’re friends?” Diamond asked in surprise.
“Yes, I consider myself one of the few honored with that position. We started out in the service together straight out of high school. Knox didn’t have many friends then, still doesn’t. The Last Riders are his friends and family, but I think that’s it. He ended up in foster care when he was pretty young. He told me he had been in over fifteen foster homes before he graduated and joined the service.”
“Fifteen?” Diamond was shocked.
“Yes, I imagine that was hard growing up; every time you became attached to a new family, being sent away.”
Diamond felt the pain for Knox in her chest, aching for the man when he was a child who had been unable to control his own life. It would have been doubly hard on Knox who had such a dominant personality.
“I knew his wife also,” Pastor Dean said, watching her reaction.
“His wife?” Diamond whispered.
“They got married about a year after he joined the service. She was very pretty and shy. I can still see her in my mind on their wedding day. They were both nineteen and thought nothing could touch them. They didn’t even have time for a honeymoon. They wanted to get married before Dena got shipped out. It was the first wedding I performed. She was shipped out thirty minutes later. They didn’t even have time to consummate their marriage, yet they didn’t care. Both of them simply laughed and held hands while they waited on the chopper to pick her up.”
“What happened?” Diamond whispered, seeing that Pastor Dean’s hands had clenched at his side.
“She was killed by a roadside bomb two days later. I was the one who had to tell him. I’ve had to deliver that news sixty-three times, but Knox was the worst. He was a friend and I saw something inside of him die that day.” Diamond couldn’t help the tears that fell from her eyes. “He met Evie and joined The Last Riders two years later, but he never let himself fall for another woman. It would be a leap of faith for him to do that and I think he gave up on God the day Dena died.”
“Why are you telling me this?” Diamond asked, finally realizing that he’d had more than one purpose in coming to her office.
“As I said, my church has a perfect view of your building.”
Diamond’s face flamed, remembering the night she had worked late and Knox had showed up. He had lifted her onto her desk and taken her until she had begged for mercy, promising she wouldn’t be late meeting him again. Pastor Dean must have gotten an eyeful.
“He had a look on his face I hadn’t seen in years. Frankly, I was happy to see someone in his life that he cared about again.”
“He doesn’t care about me,” Diamond said. “I asked him, he wouldn’t tell me.”
“Knox isn’t much of a talker. That’s for damn sure, but I’m not surprised he’s running away, especially if he cares for you. He won’t willingly put himself out there to be hurt again,” Pastor Dean advised.
“He wouldn’t. He’s a marshmallow,” she agreed with his assessment.
“A marshmallow?” Diamond nodded. “Yes, well, I don’t know if I’d agree with that analogy, but if it keeps you from playing ‘Rolling in the Deep’ over and over again, I’m all for it.”
“You can hear that?” Pastor Dean nodded. Diamond couldn’t help but laugh. “You and my secretary won’t be hearing it again,” Diamond promised.
“Thank God,” Pastor Dean declared, standing up.
“It was nice to meet you, Pastor Dean, and I think I will take you up on your invitation. I’ll see you Sunday.”
“It was nice to meet you, too, Diamond.” Pastor Dean left her office, closing the door behind him.
As soon as he left, Diamond went to her desk phone, pushing in Knox’s number. She wanted to talk to him. She didn’t know what she would say, she just wanted to hear his voice. He didn’t answer on her first call, he didn’t answer the next six times she called, nor did he return any of her texts or messages. After an hour of failed attempts, Diamond left her office, going to her car.
She had somewhere to go now.
Driving carefully through the tears clouding her vision, she went in search of the one person who could make it better.
 
 
Chapter Nineteen
 
No one was home as Diamond put her key into the door, going inside the quiet house. It was ironic that the last few weeks her parents had called and Diamond hadn’t returned their calls, yet now that she wanted someone to talk to, no one was around. Diamond walked around the empty house, unsure of what to do. She went outside onto the back porch, sitting in the swing that faced the yard. Her foot gently sent the swing into motion.
She heard the back door open and close. “Diamond? Why are you sitting out here? It’s freezing out.”
Her father walked around to the front of the swing.
“What’s wrong?” He sat down beside her.
“I love Knox. I love him so much.” Diamond buried her face in her hands. “I don’t even know why I love the big jerk.” Her father put his arm around her shoulder. Diamond turned to him, crying on his shoulder.
“How does he feel?” Her father looked over his shoulder to his wife and Sex Piston standing silently behind the swing. He started to get up and let his wife handle the situation, but Sizzle shook her head.
“He doesn’t love me back.” Diamond cried harder.
“Are you sure?” Her father pulled her closer.
“Yes, now he won’t even talk to me.”
“Then make him,” he said matter-of-factly.
“What?” Diamond looked up from his shoulder.
“Make him talk to you. It’s what your mother did.”
“When?” Diamond couldn’t remember her parents ever even having an argument.
Her father took a deep breath. “When you girls were little, we broke up for a while. We argued over custody so we decided to live together until you girls were older. It was the worst six months of my life. I loved your mom, but she was sick of me putting the Destructors first. She didn’t want me to leave the club, she just wanted equal time. I was stupid and put the club first and you guys second. When I missed Sex Piston’s birthday party, she’d had it. Living with your mom and yet not being with her was terrible. I’m ashamed to say I did stupid shit that I regret, that I will always regret, Diamond.”