She probably still wished him to the fiery depths of hell. When people said his name, she probably cringed and regretted every moment she had spent with him. He broke her. Probably worse than the cancer she fought ever did. When he would look at her Facebook and study at the pictures she allowed the world to see, all he saw was fakeness. She wasn’t smiling the way she did when she was with him. She just looked pained.
Or at least he hoped she was.
“What’s up with you?”
Looking over, Karson met Jordie’s dark brown gaze. Despite it not being play-off season, Jordie had a long beard that he was currently twisting around his finger as he eyed Karson. The guy looked like he belonged back home in the backwoods of Colorado with an axe in one hand while wearing a plaid shirt. Looked as if he should be skinning a rabbit with his bare hands instead of murdering guys on the ice. He was the best enforcer on the Assassins, and Karson was glad he was his friend. He was kind of scary.
“Nothing,” Karson lied.
“Jack shit. You always get dumb when we come here. When are you going to tell me why?” he asked, receiving a dark look from Karson. “I know it has to do with that girl, so just tell me.”
Shrugging, he said, “She lives here.”
“Yeah, so? Hasn’t it been twenty years since you’ve seen her? Isn’t it time to get over it?”
Yeah, it was.
“It’s been nine, and I don’t see how this is any of your concern,” Karson said as he reached for the door handle to The Gage.
“Asshole,” JT threw at him, but he ignored it as he looked for their friends. When he spotted his teammates Erik Titov and Phillip Anderson, he made his way toward them, ignoring the hot little hostess who was trying to catch his eye. He wouldn’t have anything to do with her. Not here. If she were in Nashville, it would be a different story, but he didn’t touch anyone in Chicago.
It always worried him that Lacey could find out. Not that she even cared anymore. Even though a little piece of him hoped she would. He knew that was pathetic and disgusting, but he hoped anyway.
Letting out a breath, he shook hands with his friends before dropping into the chair as Erik said, “Man, you sucked today at practice. Better clean that up before the game tomorrow. What’s up with you?”
For shit’s sake.
“I asked the same thing. He’s being a fucking pussy, still caught up on some girl from thirty years ago,” JT said and Karson glared.
“Aren’t you only thirty?” Erik asked with his brow up.
“Yeah, and fuck you, JT. Why am I even your friend?”
“’Cause I am fucking awesome, dude. Duh,” he answered like it was as true as the sky was blue.
Which it wasn’t. JT was kind of an asshole, but everyone still liked him for some odd reason.
“Oh, that Lacey chick, she lives here, doesn’t she?” Phillip asked and Karson rolled his eyes.
“Guys, let’s drop it. I don’t want to talk about it.”
He never did. Not to anyone. Not his mom, his sister, not even his dad. Not that he would ever tell his dad anyway. They were superclose, but they didn’t talk about emotional shit at all. When Karson had come home, broken over Lacey, all his dad did was hand Karson a stick and stand in goal, blocking each shot that he shot until Karson basically collapsed to the ground in tears and exhaustion. Even then, his dad simply patted him on the back before walking away. Karl King didn’t do emotion. But he must have told his mom because Regina King was out there in a second, fussing and fawning over him.
As she held him tight in her arms, all Karson could do was wish that he could do it all over again.
He would have chosen her.
He wouldn’t have given in to her father and allowed him to ruin them. He would have told him to fuck off and prayed that he could give Lacey the life she deserved. He was pretty sure he could have too. He went third in the draft, first round. He didn’t even go into the AHL; he went straight into the pros, playing for the Lightning with a great contract. He loved Tampa; it was great but it wasn’t home, and most of the time he was just lost, trying to mend the pieces of his broken heart.
After playing for six years with them, he was traded to the Assassins, and crazily enough, he felt as if he was finally home. It was weird. He had been with the same group of guys for six years and hadn’t felt as comfortable as he did when he stepped into the Assassins’ locker room. It wasn’t just a team; it was a family. For the last three years, he had played great hockey but also had become part of an extended family. He loved the Assassins, minus JT, but he knew he would give it all up for her.
He once tried to do just that too.
After a year apart, when he knew he was settled and was sure he could take care of her if her cancer came back, he tried to contact her, but that went south quickly. Grady, her brother, threatened to kill him, and her dad changed her phone number, but that didn’t derail him. He was about to go to Chicago to see if he could get her back, but what stopped him was when his coach bumped him down to the fourth line, saying he wasn’t performing the way he should. Karson knew it was all crap, that it was Nate Martin warning him to stay away. And like a coward, he again did what Nate Martin wanted and again chose hockey over Lacey.
At that point, he decided he didn’t deserve her and left her alone, even though it didn’t feel right. He was young and stupid though because now, he would give it all up. Everything. Because what is a life without love?
Or at least he hoped she was.
“What’s up with you?”
Looking over, Karson met Jordie’s dark brown gaze. Despite it not being play-off season, Jordie had a long beard that he was currently twisting around his finger as he eyed Karson. The guy looked like he belonged back home in the backwoods of Colorado with an axe in one hand while wearing a plaid shirt. Looked as if he should be skinning a rabbit with his bare hands instead of murdering guys on the ice. He was the best enforcer on the Assassins, and Karson was glad he was his friend. He was kind of scary.
“Nothing,” Karson lied.
“Jack shit. You always get dumb when we come here. When are you going to tell me why?” he asked, receiving a dark look from Karson. “I know it has to do with that girl, so just tell me.”
Shrugging, he said, “She lives here.”
“Yeah, so? Hasn’t it been twenty years since you’ve seen her? Isn’t it time to get over it?”
Yeah, it was.
“It’s been nine, and I don’t see how this is any of your concern,” Karson said as he reached for the door handle to The Gage.
“Asshole,” JT threw at him, but he ignored it as he looked for their friends. When he spotted his teammates Erik Titov and Phillip Anderson, he made his way toward them, ignoring the hot little hostess who was trying to catch his eye. He wouldn’t have anything to do with her. Not here. If she were in Nashville, it would be a different story, but he didn’t touch anyone in Chicago.
It always worried him that Lacey could find out. Not that she even cared anymore. Even though a little piece of him hoped she would. He knew that was pathetic and disgusting, but he hoped anyway.
Letting out a breath, he shook hands with his friends before dropping into the chair as Erik said, “Man, you sucked today at practice. Better clean that up before the game tomorrow. What’s up with you?”
For shit’s sake.
“I asked the same thing. He’s being a fucking pussy, still caught up on some girl from thirty years ago,” JT said and Karson glared.
“Aren’t you only thirty?” Erik asked with his brow up.
“Yeah, and fuck you, JT. Why am I even your friend?”
“’Cause I am fucking awesome, dude. Duh,” he answered like it was as true as the sky was blue.
Which it wasn’t. JT was kind of an asshole, but everyone still liked him for some odd reason.
“Oh, that Lacey chick, she lives here, doesn’t she?” Phillip asked and Karson rolled his eyes.
“Guys, let’s drop it. I don’t want to talk about it.”
He never did. Not to anyone. Not his mom, his sister, not even his dad. Not that he would ever tell his dad anyway. They were superclose, but they didn’t talk about emotional shit at all. When Karson had come home, broken over Lacey, all his dad did was hand Karson a stick and stand in goal, blocking each shot that he shot until Karson basically collapsed to the ground in tears and exhaustion. Even then, his dad simply patted him on the back before walking away. Karl King didn’t do emotion. But he must have told his mom because Regina King was out there in a second, fussing and fawning over him.
As she held him tight in her arms, all Karson could do was wish that he could do it all over again.
He would have chosen her.
He wouldn’t have given in to her father and allowed him to ruin them. He would have told him to fuck off and prayed that he could give Lacey the life she deserved. He was pretty sure he could have too. He went third in the draft, first round. He didn’t even go into the AHL; he went straight into the pros, playing for the Lightning with a great contract. He loved Tampa; it was great but it wasn’t home, and most of the time he was just lost, trying to mend the pieces of his broken heart.
After playing for six years with them, he was traded to the Assassins, and crazily enough, he felt as if he was finally home. It was weird. He had been with the same group of guys for six years and hadn’t felt as comfortable as he did when he stepped into the Assassins’ locker room. It wasn’t just a team; it was a family. For the last three years, he had played great hockey but also had become part of an extended family. He loved the Assassins, minus JT, but he knew he would give it all up for her.
He once tried to do just that too.
After a year apart, when he knew he was settled and was sure he could take care of her if her cancer came back, he tried to contact her, but that went south quickly. Grady, her brother, threatened to kill him, and her dad changed her phone number, but that didn’t derail him. He was about to go to Chicago to see if he could get her back, but what stopped him was when his coach bumped him down to the fourth line, saying he wasn’t performing the way he should. Karson knew it was all crap, that it was Nate Martin warning him to stay away. And like a coward, he again did what Nate Martin wanted and again chose hockey over Lacey.
At that point, he decided he didn’t deserve her and left her alone, even though it didn’t feel right. He was young and stupid though because now, he would give it all up. Everything. Because what is a life without love?
