Coming round the side and bitter with cold, I wondered what to do about the guards. I couldn’t much climb past them, and my head weren’t working proper enough to figure out a better plan. Moments came and went, and I were just colder and colder yet.
Looking to the residences, I wondered if I had to go back. If I had to return to him in his foul temper in that thimble of a room. I stepped forward, then stopped. Weren’t nothing that way but pain and trouble. How could I go back?
“My lady,” the guards said.
I turned. They stepped their heels together in an awful clamor.
I walked toward them slow, careful, and they kept their watch.
Walking past them, every step got more quick as I realized they full meant to let me walk out unbothered. It seemed there were something I could like about being a noblewoman after all.
The guards at the base of the castle opened the gates for me, and gave me a horse and a cloak besides. I could bare stammer out my thanks, stunned stupid with surprise.
I rode out into the night, heading straight for Edwinstowe. The horse bore me more quick than my feet would, and the beast took me through the narrow wooded path that led to the monastery. I dismounted and left the horse in the yard, going to the warming room.
I stopped at the door, my hand trembling near the latch, remembering the last time I were in there.
My hand made its decision and the latch tripped, the door opening and the warmth running over me. The three boys stopped. They weren’t asleep yet, and for one horrible breath, I wondered if in skirts and a noble’s kit I didn’t belong here.
“Christ, it’s good to see you, Scar,” Much said, bounding over to me and hugging me.
John were next, lifting me off the floor with his big arms.
Then he let me go and Robin were there, and the part of me that weren’t much tough at all, the part that loved him and were terror-struck at Gisbourne rose up, and tears jumped from my eyes.
He caught me close, tucking me tight into his chest till it felt like my own chest, till it felt like he drew breath and it ran through me to make me strong. “They can’t see,” he whispered in my ear. “Cry as much as you need to, Scar. I won’t let them see.”
His arms strapped closer around me and gave me their strength. “I am so scared of him, Rob,” I whispered soft, rubbing his neck with my words.
“You’re all right,” he murmured, his hands like running water down my back to draw my pain away. “You’re with me now. And if you want, you don’t ever have to go back there.”
“Just hold on to me a bit longer,” I breathed into his neck, the skin hot and damp with tears.
He nodded, and I thanked God for his calm heart.
I held him till my breath ran steady and I could bear to untwine my arms from him. As I let go, I looked at his face and I knew in a heartbeat he weren’t calm at all. He were furious, rage and steel and hellfire in his eyes, but he were calm for me. He gave calm to me so I could be strong.
“So,” I asked, giving a bare smile, “what’s the plan?”
“Thoresby’s been allowed to compete,” Much said, “but he can’t beat much of anything in an archery contest. He’s truly a terrible shot.”
“The obvious thing is just to dress Rob up like Thoresby,” John said, “but he doesn’t want to do it.”
“I’m working with him,” Rob said. “He’s getting better.”
“He’s not really,” said Much. “But I’m trying to figure some sort of arm band to make his aim better.”
“Why won’t you just stand in for him?” John asked. “You’ll be in a coat and scarf and such anyway. We could make you pass. Dammit, Rob, it’s the simplest plan.”
“No, it isn’t,” Rob said quiet. “We all know what’s happening to me and I can’t be counted on for much. Besides, if they catch me, he’s disqualified entirely. And I’ll be killed.”
I threaded his fingers through mine and squeezed. It weren’t like I would ever let that pass.
“I’ll see what I can pick up about the others,” I said.
“Gisbourne’s a good shot,” John said. “We know that.”
I nodded. “I think that’s why Prince John chose this. Gisbourne claims it were promised to him, and I think the prince is just making a show and giving it to Gisbourne anyway.”
“All we’ve got is Thoresby,” John said with a sigh. “I don’t think it will be enough.”
Gripping Rob tight, I stepped forward. “It has to be enough. Our people have gone through hell and more under the last sheriff. If Gisbourne is sheriff we won’t never be free.”
“We’ve gone through hell,” John growled. “And we have nothing to show for it. I’m beyond weary of all of this.”
“We’re close, John,” I told him. “Things will be different with Thoresby.”
“Things are never different,” he said, and stared at the fire.
“You lot go to sleep,” Rob said. “Scar, are you going back tonight?”
My pipes ran thick, and I swallowed. I had to, didn’t I? “Yes,” I said soft.
“I’ll walk you back.”
He let go of my hand for a moment to pull on a cape and boots, and even that small bit of him I wanted back. It returned swift, and his fingers pressed into mine, gloveless and warm.
He tugged a slight bit and I followed him.
Looking to the residences, I wondered if I had to go back. If I had to return to him in his foul temper in that thimble of a room. I stepped forward, then stopped. Weren’t nothing that way but pain and trouble. How could I go back?
“My lady,” the guards said.
I turned. They stepped their heels together in an awful clamor.
I walked toward them slow, careful, and they kept their watch.
Walking past them, every step got more quick as I realized they full meant to let me walk out unbothered. It seemed there were something I could like about being a noblewoman after all.
The guards at the base of the castle opened the gates for me, and gave me a horse and a cloak besides. I could bare stammer out my thanks, stunned stupid with surprise.
I rode out into the night, heading straight for Edwinstowe. The horse bore me more quick than my feet would, and the beast took me through the narrow wooded path that led to the monastery. I dismounted and left the horse in the yard, going to the warming room.
I stopped at the door, my hand trembling near the latch, remembering the last time I were in there.
My hand made its decision and the latch tripped, the door opening and the warmth running over me. The three boys stopped. They weren’t asleep yet, and for one horrible breath, I wondered if in skirts and a noble’s kit I didn’t belong here.
“Christ, it’s good to see you, Scar,” Much said, bounding over to me and hugging me.
John were next, lifting me off the floor with his big arms.
Then he let me go and Robin were there, and the part of me that weren’t much tough at all, the part that loved him and were terror-struck at Gisbourne rose up, and tears jumped from my eyes.
He caught me close, tucking me tight into his chest till it felt like my own chest, till it felt like he drew breath and it ran through me to make me strong. “They can’t see,” he whispered in my ear. “Cry as much as you need to, Scar. I won’t let them see.”
His arms strapped closer around me and gave me their strength. “I am so scared of him, Rob,” I whispered soft, rubbing his neck with my words.
“You’re all right,” he murmured, his hands like running water down my back to draw my pain away. “You’re with me now. And if you want, you don’t ever have to go back there.”
“Just hold on to me a bit longer,” I breathed into his neck, the skin hot and damp with tears.
He nodded, and I thanked God for his calm heart.
I held him till my breath ran steady and I could bear to untwine my arms from him. As I let go, I looked at his face and I knew in a heartbeat he weren’t calm at all. He were furious, rage and steel and hellfire in his eyes, but he were calm for me. He gave calm to me so I could be strong.
“So,” I asked, giving a bare smile, “what’s the plan?”
“Thoresby’s been allowed to compete,” Much said, “but he can’t beat much of anything in an archery contest. He’s truly a terrible shot.”
“The obvious thing is just to dress Rob up like Thoresby,” John said, “but he doesn’t want to do it.”
“I’m working with him,” Rob said. “He’s getting better.”
“He’s not really,” said Much. “But I’m trying to figure some sort of arm band to make his aim better.”
“Why won’t you just stand in for him?” John asked. “You’ll be in a coat and scarf and such anyway. We could make you pass. Dammit, Rob, it’s the simplest plan.”
“No, it isn’t,” Rob said quiet. “We all know what’s happening to me and I can’t be counted on for much. Besides, if they catch me, he’s disqualified entirely. And I’ll be killed.”
I threaded his fingers through mine and squeezed. It weren’t like I would ever let that pass.
“I’ll see what I can pick up about the others,” I said.
“Gisbourne’s a good shot,” John said. “We know that.”
I nodded. “I think that’s why Prince John chose this. Gisbourne claims it were promised to him, and I think the prince is just making a show and giving it to Gisbourne anyway.”
“All we’ve got is Thoresby,” John said with a sigh. “I don’t think it will be enough.”
Gripping Rob tight, I stepped forward. “It has to be enough. Our people have gone through hell and more under the last sheriff. If Gisbourne is sheriff we won’t never be free.”
“We’ve gone through hell,” John growled. “And we have nothing to show for it. I’m beyond weary of all of this.”
“We’re close, John,” I told him. “Things will be different with Thoresby.”
“Things are never different,” he said, and stared at the fire.
“You lot go to sleep,” Rob said. “Scar, are you going back tonight?”
My pipes ran thick, and I swallowed. I had to, didn’t I? “Yes,” I said soft.
“I’ll walk you back.”
He let go of my hand for a moment to pull on a cape and boots, and even that small bit of him I wanted back. It returned swift, and his fingers pressed into mine, gloveless and warm.
He tugged a slight bit and I followed him.
