She took a deep breath. “I think we should tread carefully here.” Erin pushed Todd back and scrambled to sit on the low table so she could face them both. Christ, they were like sexy bookends.
“Why?” she asked Todd.
“I want to give you that, to share that with you and with him. I see how he looks at you.”
“Would you feel more comfortable if I left?” Ben asked her.
She shook her head. “No, I think since Todd brought it up in your presence it’s important to include you now.” Erin looked back to Todd.
“Our relationship isn’t a tourist destination, Todd. Inviting someone in takes a lovely fantasy”—she looked over Ben slowly and fanned herself—“and makes it reality. Reality is complicated. Reality has consequences you can’t begin to understand until it’s already happening. I love you, Todd. I’m attracted to Ben, yes. Lord, look at him, how could you not be? But are you going to be able to handle it? Seeing me with someone else?”
He nodded eagerly and she wanted to laugh.
“I know I am, and that’s why it’s so f**king hot. I can’t explain it; it just makes me hard every time a man looks at you and wants to f**k you. I want to see you with another man eating your cunt.” He blushed and she licked her lips.
“You’re blushing. Just when I think you can’t surprise me anymore, you blush. We can do this in ways that don’t involve your best friend. We can f**k when people can hear, or even see. Like this afternoon. There are clubs, things like that.”
“I don’t want you to f**k a stranger. I want you to f**k someone I know and trust. I know and trust Ben. I know and trust you. If it’s too much, it’s okay. I understand. I just wanted to be honest with you. To share that fantasy.”
“You don’t know how much it makes me want to crawl up your body and impale myself on your c**k right now just hearing that. Since we’re discussing particulars and all, let me say I don’t want to see you with another woman. I’d have to hurt someone, you too.” She shrugged. “It’s not fair, I know. But I don’t want you with any woman but me.”
“Good. I don’t want any other woman but you. But I’m not talking about me being with another woman, and now that I know you don’t want it, we’ve gotten that out of the way. But what if Ben and I . . . if we were together too?” He paused, waiting for her to speak again.
A flush bloomed over her at the idea of her man and Ben all over each other. “I can’t lie and say it doesn’t turn me on to imagine myself sandwiched between you and Ben. Or um, imagining you and Ben. But what does this mean? Have you been together before? Do you envision this to be a one-off or what? What do you think, Ben?”
“I haven’t thought it all out down to the combination of sexual positions. To be honest, I haven’t really had fantasies about men before, but I’m not ruling out a kiss or a touch. Three people naked in a bed, it’s only natural that people would touch. I just want to know what you’re okay with.”
Erin did like that answer a lot. Showed her he wasn’t just all whee—three-way, but was really thinking on what may happen and how to keep it okay for everyone.
“You’ve done this before?” Todd asked her.
She burst out laughing. “No. Why would you say that?”
“Aren’t threesomes like communion to rockstars?”
She snorted. “The whole rockstar thing—that’s dude rockstars, or so I hear. But I’m not a dude. I did suck a guy off in full view at a club in Amsterdam. That was before fame. Once I got famous I had to be very careful. And in truth, I’d only want that with someone I felt very secure with. I like being watched.” Now it was her turn to blush. “I used to finger myself in the tour bus when I knew Jeremy could see me but couldn’t do anything.”
Todd made a desperate sound and Ben groaned.
“He didn’t like it. He was always too worried. It was his job though.”
“Did you finger yourself like the way you did at the tavern playing pool the other day? Feel free to finger yourself anytime you want in my line of vision. Or anyone else’s vision as long as I’m with you. I don’t want you unsafe. You like being watched, honey, I like watching. You’re perfect. My perfect little artsy-fartsy freak.”
She wasn’t offended by his words; it pleased her that he felt comfortable enough to tease her, and she liked that she was an artsy-fartsy freak.
Ben cleared his throat. “You asked what I thought? I’ve been attracted to you since day one. I love that Todd loves you. He’s my best friend, which makes me care about you all the more. But I adore you independent of that too. Todd and I have never been together like that, but I can’t lie and say I don’t find him attractive that way. You should know I’m bi, so I’m certainly not against a true three-way between us. But I don’t think Todd is ready to jump into sucking cock.”
Erin laughed and Todd rolled his eyes. “And you envision this as?”
“Let’s take it one step at a time. It could be horrible.” Ben laughed. Erin sincerely doubted that part. “I lived in a triad for several years. I enjoyed it. I know it’s possible with a great deal of negotiation and communication. But that may not be what you two want. I think it’s important to talk about it but to keep our expectations minimal for the time being. I want to f**k you, Erin. I can’t lie.”
“Why?” she asked Todd.
“I want to give you that, to share that with you and with him. I see how he looks at you.”
“Would you feel more comfortable if I left?” Ben asked her.
She shook her head. “No, I think since Todd brought it up in your presence it’s important to include you now.” Erin looked back to Todd.
“Our relationship isn’t a tourist destination, Todd. Inviting someone in takes a lovely fantasy”—she looked over Ben slowly and fanned herself—“and makes it reality. Reality is complicated. Reality has consequences you can’t begin to understand until it’s already happening. I love you, Todd. I’m attracted to Ben, yes. Lord, look at him, how could you not be? But are you going to be able to handle it? Seeing me with someone else?”
He nodded eagerly and she wanted to laugh.
“I know I am, and that’s why it’s so f**king hot. I can’t explain it; it just makes me hard every time a man looks at you and wants to f**k you. I want to see you with another man eating your cunt.” He blushed and she licked her lips.
“You’re blushing. Just when I think you can’t surprise me anymore, you blush. We can do this in ways that don’t involve your best friend. We can f**k when people can hear, or even see. Like this afternoon. There are clubs, things like that.”
“I don’t want you to f**k a stranger. I want you to f**k someone I know and trust. I know and trust Ben. I know and trust you. If it’s too much, it’s okay. I understand. I just wanted to be honest with you. To share that fantasy.”
“You don’t know how much it makes me want to crawl up your body and impale myself on your c**k right now just hearing that. Since we’re discussing particulars and all, let me say I don’t want to see you with another woman. I’d have to hurt someone, you too.” She shrugged. “It’s not fair, I know. But I don’t want you with any woman but me.”
“Good. I don’t want any other woman but you. But I’m not talking about me being with another woman, and now that I know you don’t want it, we’ve gotten that out of the way. But what if Ben and I . . . if we were together too?” He paused, waiting for her to speak again.
A flush bloomed over her at the idea of her man and Ben all over each other. “I can’t lie and say it doesn’t turn me on to imagine myself sandwiched between you and Ben. Or um, imagining you and Ben. But what does this mean? Have you been together before? Do you envision this to be a one-off or what? What do you think, Ben?”
“I haven’t thought it all out down to the combination of sexual positions. To be honest, I haven’t really had fantasies about men before, but I’m not ruling out a kiss or a touch. Three people naked in a bed, it’s only natural that people would touch. I just want to know what you’re okay with.”
Erin did like that answer a lot. Showed her he wasn’t just all whee—three-way, but was really thinking on what may happen and how to keep it okay for everyone.
“You’ve done this before?” Todd asked her.
She burst out laughing. “No. Why would you say that?”
“Aren’t threesomes like communion to rockstars?”
She snorted. “The whole rockstar thing—that’s dude rockstars, or so I hear. But I’m not a dude. I did suck a guy off in full view at a club in Amsterdam. That was before fame. Once I got famous I had to be very careful. And in truth, I’d only want that with someone I felt very secure with. I like being watched.” Now it was her turn to blush. “I used to finger myself in the tour bus when I knew Jeremy could see me but couldn’t do anything.”
Todd made a desperate sound and Ben groaned.
“He didn’t like it. He was always too worried. It was his job though.”
“Did you finger yourself like the way you did at the tavern playing pool the other day? Feel free to finger yourself anytime you want in my line of vision. Or anyone else’s vision as long as I’m with you. I don’t want you unsafe. You like being watched, honey, I like watching. You’re perfect. My perfect little artsy-fartsy freak.”
She wasn’t offended by his words; it pleased her that he felt comfortable enough to tease her, and she liked that she was an artsy-fartsy freak.
Ben cleared his throat. “You asked what I thought? I’ve been attracted to you since day one. I love that Todd loves you. He’s my best friend, which makes me care about you all the more. But I adore you independent of that too. Todd and I have never been together like that, but I can’t lie and say I don’t find him attractive that way. You should know I’m bi, so I’m certainly not against a true three-way between us. But I don’t think Todd is ready to jump into sucking cock.”
Erin laughed and Todd rolled his eyes. “And you envision this as?”
“Let’s take it one step at a time. It could be horrible.” Ben laughed. Erin sincerely doubted that part. “I lived in a triad for several years. I enjoyed it. I know it’s possible with a great deal of negotiation and communication. But that may not be what you two want. I think it’s important to talk about it but to keep our expectations minimal for the time being. I want to f**k you, Erin. I can’t lie.”
