“Being without you...it’s been harder than I expected,” he says.
“I know. I hate being without you.”
He rolls on top of me, kisses me again, kisses me hard and deep and thorough, until I’m panting and shaking and aching, desperate for more. For him. Only him.
“Request a court date,” I say, close to begging him. “Join me in Troika. You aren’t happy in Myriad.”
Features ragged, tortured, he shakes his head. “I can’t leave yet.”
“You can!” I have to reach this boy. “Killian... I know you believe in Fusion. I know you think your mother’s spirit is Fused with a human, but Myriad is wrong. Troikan spirits enter into the Rest after Second-death and Myriadian spirits... I think they enter Many Ends. Spirits never die, right?” I rush out before he can protest. “After Second-death they have to go somewhere, and there’s a connection between Myriad and Many Ends. Why else would there be a connection?”
He stiffens, but he doesn’t argue with me. And I think... I think I’m finally making progress.
One by one...
“I don’t know if Myriadians end up in Many Ends after Second-death,” he rasps. “You saw no proof of that when you escaped, and I’m not sure how it would work. But I do know Fusion is a lie. When both my General and my Leader refused to tell me my mother’s name, pretending they had to jump through hoops to get the information, I took matters into my own hands. I snuck around and got the information on my own.”
I tremble as I ask, “What name did you discover?”
“In her Firstlife, her name was Honor Flynn. The human she is supposedly Fused to is Estella Orzo.” He tenses as he says, “I visited her. That girl...my mother was not a part of that girl.”
The anger in his tone gives added weight to his conviction. Proceed with care. “You died as an infant and never met your mother. How are you so sure?” What finally convinced him?
“The things that girl was doing... My mother would never act that way. Would never attempt to sleep with me. Honor Flynn has to be somewhere else. Maybe you’re right, maybe she’s in Many Ends.”
I give him a comforting squeeze. “So...what do we do now?”
“I have to find a way in to search for her. If she’s there, I can’t leave her. I never knew her, but I need to know her.”
Dread slithers around me, a boa determined to choke all hope out of me. Killian is going to continue endangering himself, and one day he’s going to be caught.
“I will find a way back inside Many Ends, Killian. I promise you. I don’t know how many spirits are there—whether they’re all Unsigned or if Myriadians are part of the mix. I don’t know how many are trapped in the mountains, food for the birds and monkeys.” The monsters! “But we can rescue everyone...together.”
Words Archer once spoke to me. I chose to act without him, and I lost him. I pray Killian doesn’t choose to act without me.
“What do you remember about the entrance and exit?” he asks.
“Each time I entered, I died in physical form and simply woke up there. Twice my body was revived and I left as quickly as I arrived. The last time, I had to swim to the bottom of a lake filled with ravenous mermaids.” I shudder.
“A lake,” he says, and I wonder if there’s something similar inside Myriad.
I change the subject—for now—not wanting to give him any ideas. I don’t want him traversing Many Ends without me. “Any leads on the spy?”
“Nothing yet.”
Who could it be? Kayla, Reed, Deacon, Victor? I trust them. Elizabeth? I would love to blame her. Levi? Even though I’m angry with him, he doesn’t strike me as a fox but a shepherd. He fights foxes, keeping them away from his flock.
“If I had to guess, I’d say Victor,” Killian says. “He defected, but still has ties to Myriad.”
“What a shocker. You do remember you admitted you’ve never liked him, right?”
“Yes, but I like him even less since you met him,” he grumbles, and I laugh. “He always had a string of women chasing after him. He promised each of them the world, but never committed.”
Well. That certainly fits Kayla’s experience. “Is that the real reason you abducted him? To keep him away from me? And how did you wipe his memory?”
“I abducted him because I suspected him of being the spy, and I wanted to make sure he couldn’t pass information to Myriad. But information was passed even while I had him. And no, I didn’t wipe his memory.”
I cross Victor off my mental Who’s the Spy list. One down. “Then who did wipe his memory? And why did you suggest Victor was the spy if you knew he wasn’t?”
“I didn’t say I stopped suspecting him. He could have found a way to pass on your secrets while in captivity.”
Maybe, but not likely. “Then why did you set him free?”
“I didn’t. Sir Zhi Chen found him. My Leader.”
My throat constricts. “Did you get in trouble for harming one of your own?”
A corner of his mouth lifts with wry amusement. “I spun the story to best suit my needs. I received a reward.”
Phew. “I’m not surprised. Spinning is your specialty.”
“Actually, I spun the story with truth, said I had to prove I would do anything—absolutely anything—for you in order to earn your trust. Zhi doesn’t know that I’m doing these things because I love you, not because I plan to use your feelings for me against you.” He gives me another hard kiss, rocking my world, before standing and drawing me to my feet. “And now I should go. I’ve been off Grid too long already.”
“I know. I hate being without you.”
He rolls on top of me, kisses me again, kisses me hard and deep and thorough, until I’m panting and shaking and aching, desperate for more. For him. Only him.
“Request a court date,” I say, close to begging him. “Join me in Troika. You aren’t happy in Myriad.”
Features ragged, tortured, he shakes his head. “I can’t leave yet.”
“You can!” I have to reach this boy. “Killian... I know you believe in Fusion. I know you think your mother’s spirit is Fused with a human, but Myriad is wrong. Troikan spirits enter into the Rest after Second-death and Myriadian spirits... I think they enter Many Ends. Spirits never die, right?” I rush out before he can protest. “After Second-death they have to go somewhere, and there’s a connection between Myriad and Many Ends. Why else would there be a connection?”
He stiffens, but he doesn’t argue with me. And I think... I think I’m finally making progress.
One by one...
“I don’t know if Myriadians end up in Many Ends after Second-death,” he rasps. “You saw no proof of that when you escaped, and I’m not sure how it would work. But I do know Fusion is a lie. When both my General and my Leader refused to tell me my mother’s name, pretending they had to jump through hoops to get the information, I took matters into my own hands. I snuck around and got the information on my own.”
I tremble as I ask, “What name did you discover?”
“In her Firstlife, her name was Honor Flynn. The human she is supposedly Fused to is Estella Orzo.” He tenses as he says, “I visited her. That girl...my mother was not a part of that girl.”
The anger in his tone gives added weight to his conviction. Proceed with care. “You died as an infant and never met your mother. How are you so sure?” What finally convinced him?
“The things that girl was doing... My mother would never act that way. Would never attempt to sleep with me. Honor Flynn has to be somewhere else. Maybe you’re right, maybe she’s in Many Ends.”
I give him a comforting squeeze. “So...what do we do now?”
“I have to find a way in to search for her. If she’s there, I can’t leave her. I never knew her, but I need to know her.”
Dread slithers around me, a boa determined to choke all hope out of me. Killian is going to continue endangering himself, and one day he’s going to be caught.
“I will find a way back inside Many Ends, Killian. I promise you. I don’t know how many spirits are there—whether they’re all Unsigned or if Myriadians are part of the mix. I don’t know how many are trapped in the mountains, food for the birds and monkeys.” The monsters! “But we can rescue everyone...together.”
Words Archer once spoke to me. I chose to act without him, and I lost him. I pray Killian doesn’t choose to act without me.
“What do you remember about the entrance and exit?” he asks.
“Each time I entered, I died in physical form and simply woke up there. Twice my body was revived and I left as quickly as I arrived. The last time, I had to swim to the bottom of a lake filled with ravenous mermaids.” I shudder.
“A lake,” he says, and I wonder if there’s something similar inside Myriad.
I change the subject—for now—not wanting to give him any ideas. I don’t want him traversing Many Ends without me. “Any leads on the spy?”
“Nothing yet.”
Who could it be? Kayla, Reed, Deacon, Victor? I trust them. Elizabeth? I would love to blame her. Levi? Even though I’m angry with him, he doesn’t strike me as a fox but a shepherd. He fights foxes, keeping them away from his flock.
“If I had to guess, I’d say Victor,” Killian says. “He defected, but still has ties to Myriad.”
“What a shocker. You do remember you admitted you’ve never liked him, right?”
“Yes, but I like him even less since you met him,” he grumbles, and I laugh. “He always had a string of women chasing after him. He promised each of them the world, but never committed.”
Well. That certainly fits Kayla’s experience. “Is that the real reason you abducted him? To keep him away from me? And how did you wipe his memory?”
“I abducted him because I suspected him of being the spy, and I wanted to make sure he couldn’t pass information to Myriad. But information was passed even while I had him. And no, I didn’t wipe his memory.”
I cross Victor off my mental Who’s the Spy list. One down. “Then who did wipe his memory? And why did you suggest Victor was the spy if you knew he wasn’t?”
“I didn’t say I stopped suspecting him. He could have found a way to pass on your secrets while in captivity.”
Maybe, but not likely. “Then why did you set him free?”
“I didn’t. Sir Zhi Chen found him. My Leader.”
My throat constricts. “Did you get in trouble for harming one of your own?”
A corner of his mouth lifts with wry amusement. “I spun the story to best suit my needs. I received a reward.”
Phew. “I’m not surprised. Spinning is your specialty.”
“Actually, I spun the story with truth, said I had to prove I would do anything—absolutely anything—for you in order to earn your trust. Zhi doesn’t know that I’m doing these things because I love you, not because I plan to use your feelings for me against you.” He gives me another hard kiss, rocking my world, before standing and drawing me to my feet. “And now I should go. I’ve been off Grid too long already.”
