Lion's Share
Page 15

“Well, I’m sure either of them will look beautiful on you.” He frowned. “Oh, wait, the bride usually wears white, doesn’t she?”
Usually. The word echoed in my brain until I couldn’t hear anything else.
Brian looked horrified. “That didn’t come out right. I didn’t mean you can’t wear white. Of course you’ll wear white.”
“Brian.” But I didn’t know what else to say.
“I’m so sorry.” He hesitated. “You never talk about it, though. Don’t you think we should—?”
“No.” I said it too quickly, and he looked hurt. “I’m sorry, but no.” The last thing I wanted was to discuss my very darkest memories in the middle of the woods with the man I’d be marrying in six months.
“If you change your mind…” He tried to pull me into an embrace but let go immediately when I didn’t relax or hug him back. “Okay, you’re not ready. That’s okay. Sometimes, it takes a long time to get over—”
“That’s not it,” I snapped, irrationally irritated by his assumption that he knew what I was thinking and feeling.
He knew nothing. Because I’d never told him. Just the thought of how that conversation might go made me sick to my stomach.
“Is it me?” Brian frowned, studying my eyes. “Am I the problem?”
“No.”
“Then it’s Jace.” His gaze dropped to the ground, but not before I caught a fleeting glimpse of jealousy. “I should have known.”
“What?” My pulse raced with a sudden burst of alarm. “No—”
He looked up sharply. “I see the way you look at him, Abby. He’s so pissed at you right now that he can’t even stand to be in the same house with you, but you still have that look on your face, like you want to take a bath in his pheromones.”
My face flushed, and I hoped he couldn’t see that in the dark. What I wanted didn’t matter, because it wasn’t reciprocated. Because it would be extraordinarily inappropriate. Because I’d already given my word and accepted a ring. “It’s not like that, Brian. He’s my Alpha.”
“That’s why you want him, isn’t it? It’s some kind of biological imperative. He’s an Alpha, so deep down, you think he must be the best possible father for your kids, but—”
“Okay, that’s enough!” I snapped, finished with trying to coddle his ego. “My biological imperatives are not the issue. I don’t even have biological imperatives, because this isn’t the Stone Age and I’m not some knuckle-dragging cavewoman, helpless to fight her reproductive urges.”
Brian’s eyes widened, and I could practically smell panic in the beads of sweat that popped up on his forehead. He’d never heard me yell. He only knew the Abby who’d been afraid of her own shadow. Afraid of everyone’s shadow.
The Abby who would agree to almost anything just so she wouldn’t have to talk anymore.
But that Abby was gone, and this Abby was going to have to start talking her way out of trouble rather than into it.
“Jace is my Alpha and nothing more.” I took another deep breath to cover the hitch in my pulse. “I’m wearing your ring.” I held up my left hand, and the diamond glittered in the moonlight. “Does that make you feel better?”
Brian nodded. “I guess I just needed the reminder. Sometimes, it seems like everyone else knows you better than I do.” He took my hand, running his thumb over my knuckles. “I love seeing that on your finger.”
Yet somehow, I couldn’t get used to the bulk of the ring, as if that one third of a carat weighed as heavily on my mind as it did on my hand.
Brian cleared his throat, then met my gaze with more boldness than I’d ever seen from him. “I’ll be so good to you, Abby. I’ll do everything I can to make you happy.”
My chest ached as if he’d punched me square in the sternum, but my heart was the real target. Brian was sweet, and honest, and my parents loved him. Maybe someday I could too.
Maybe…
“I know you will,” I said at last. His eyes lit up, and it worried me that a few words from me could change his entire demeanor. I didn’t want to be responsible for his mental state. Hell, I didn’t want to be responsible for my own mood.
“Okay. I need some space now, if you don’t mind. I need to think.”
Brian frowned and glanced around at the dense woods. “I’m not supposed to leave you alone out here.”
I made sure he could see me roll my eyes. “I’m an enforcer now. Besides, we’re in the middle of the South-Central Territory, less than a mile from the ranch. I’ll be fine.”
He glanced in the direction of the main house. “You sure?”
“Yeah. I’ll catch up with you before you even get back. I just need a few minutes. Please.”
“Okay. But hurry.” He took one last look at me, then walked off through the woods. When his footsteps finally faded from earshot, I exhaled and leaned against a tree, staring up at the moon between its bare branches.
Why did I find every conversation about my impending marriage utterly exhausting?
A twig snapped in the dark and I jerked upright, instantly on alert. I scanned the woods to my left and right, suddenly wishing I’d taken the time to shift my eyes. But then I inhaled to survey the ambient scents, and…
“How long have you been there?” I demanded in a whisper I knew damn well he could hear.
Jace stepped out of the shadows, his hands in the pockets of his jeans, his arms relaxed, as if he were on a casual midnight stroll. Through the deep woods, exactly where he’d sent me on “patrol” with Brian. “Long enough.”
Shit. He’d heard everything Brian had said about him. “It isn’t nice to eavesdrop.”
Jace took a silent step toward me, and the gravity of his gaze belied his casual posture. “‘Nice’ isn’t in an Alpha’s job description.”
“Brian just bared his soul, and he had no idea you could hear him.”
“I gave him every opportunity to notice me.” He took another step forward, his intense focus pinning me where I stood. Was that anger in the line of his jaw or…something else?
My heart hammered so hard, I was sure he could hear it. “Don’t blame him. I didn’t notice you either.”