“Maybe there’s trouble.”
“Between Brad and Kitty?” Dad took a sip of water. “Maybe there is. But that’s not our business.”
“So if Brad is off in Bolivia, what are Kitty and Mickey doing here?”
“They’re looking to settle back in the States. They’re debating between this area and California.”
Another lie, Myron was sure. Way to manipulate the old man, Kitty. Get Myron off my back and maybe we will want to live near you. Keep him bugging us and we move across the country. “Why now? Why did they come back home after all these years?”
“I don’t know. I didn’t ask.”
“Dad, I know you like to give your kids privacy, but I think you’re taking this not-interfering thing a little too far.”
He chuckled at that. “You have to give them room, Myron. I never told you how I felt about Jessica, for example.”
Again with his old girlfriend. “Wait, I thought you liked Jessica.”
“She was bad news,” Dad said.
“But you never said anything.”
“It wasn’t my place.”
“Maybe you should have,” Myron said. “Maybe it would have saved me a lot of heartache.”
Dad shook his head. “I would do anything to protect you”—he almost glanced outside, having proved the point mere minutes ago—“but the best way to do that is to let you make your own mistakes. A mistake-proof life is not worth living.”
“So I just let it go?”
“For now, yes. Brad knows you reached out—Kitty will tell him. I e-mailed him too. If he wants to reach back, he will.”
Myron flashed to another memory: Brad, age seven, getting bullied at sleepaway camp. Myron remembered Brad just sitting out by the old softball field by himself. Brad had made the last out and the bullies had taunted en masse. Myron tried to sit with him but Brad just kept crying and telling Myron to go away. It was one of those times you feel so helpless you’d kill to make the pain go away. He remembered another time, when the entire Bolitar family went to Miami during the February school break. He and Brad shared a hotel room, and one night, after a fun-filled day at the Parrot Jungle, Myron asked him about school and Brad broke down and cried and said that he hated it and had no friends and it broke Myron’s heart in about a thousand places. The next day, sitting out by the pool, Myron asked Dad what he should do about it. His father’s advice had been simple: “Don’t raise it. Don’t make him sad now. Just let him enjoy his vacation.”
Brad had been gawky, awkward, a later bloomer. Or maybe it had just been growing up behind Myron.
“I thought you wanted us to reconcile,” Myron said.
“I do. But you can’t force it. Give them room.”
His father was still breathing hard from the earlier altercation. There was no reason to get him all upset now. It could wait until the morning. But then: “Kitty is using drugs,” Myron said.
Dad raised an eyebrow. “You know this?”
“Yes.”
Dad rubbed his chin and considered this new development. Then: “You still need to leave them alone.”
“Are you serious?”
“Did you know that at one point your mother was addicted to painkillers?”
Myron said nothing, stunned.
“It’s getting late,” Dad said. He started to get up from the couch. “You okay?”
“Wait, you’re just going to drop this bomb on me and walk away?”
“It wasn’t a big deal. That’s my point. We worked it out.”
Myron didn’t know what to say. He also wondered what Dad would make of it if he told him about Kitty’s sex act in the nightclub, and man, he hoped that Dad wouldn’t use another Mom-did-same analogy on that one.
Give it a rest for the night, Myron thought. No reason to do anything hasty. There will be nothing new until daylight. They heard a car pull into the driveway and then the sound of a car door slamming shut.
“That will be your mother.” Al Bolitar rose gingerly. Myron stood too. “Don’t tell her about tonight. I don’t want her worrying.”
“Okay. Hey, Dad?”
“Yes?”
“Nice tackle out there.”
Dad tried not to smile. Myron looked at the aging face. He had that overwhelming feeling, the melancholy one he got when he realized that his parents were getting older. He wanted to say more, wanted to thank him, but he knew that his father knew all that and that any additional discussion on the subject would be unseemly or superfluous. Let the moment alone. Let it breathe.
19
At two thirty A.M., Myron headed upstairs to that same childhood bedroom he’d shared with Brad, the one that still had the Tot Finder sticker on the window, and flipped on the computer.
He logged on to Skype. The screen opened on Terese’s face, and as always, he felt the heady rush and, yep, the lightness in his chest.
“God, you’re beautiful,” he said.
Terese smiled. “May I speak frankly?”
“Please.”
“You are the sexiest man I’ve ever known, and right now, just looking at you is driving me up a wall.”
Myron sat up a little taller. Talk about the perfect medicine. “I’m trying very hard not to preen,” he said. “And I’m not even sure what preening is.”
“May I continue to be frank?” she asked.
“Please.”
“I would be willing to try, uh, something via video, but I don’t quite get it, do you?”
“I confess I don’t.”
“Does that make us old-fashioned? I don’t get computer sex or phone sex or any of that.”
“I tried phone sex once,” Myron said.
“And?”
“And I never felt so self-conscious in my life. I started laughing at a particularly inopportune stage.”
“Okay, so we’re in agreement.”
“Yep.”
“You’re not just saying that? Because, you know, I mean, I know we’re far apart—”
“I’m not just saying that.”
“Good,” Terese said. “So what’s going on over there?”
“How much time do you have?” Myron asked.
“Maybe another twenty minutes.”
“How about we spend ten of it just talking like this and then I’ll tell you?”
Even through a computer monitor, Terese looked at him as though he were the only man in the world. Everything vanished. There was just the two of them. “That bad?” she said.
“Between Brad and Kitty?” Dad took a sip of water. “Maybe there is. But that’s not our business.”
“So if Brad is off in Bolivia, what are Kitty and Mickey doing here?”
“They’re looking to settle back in the States. They’re debating between this area and California.”
Another lie, Myron was sure. Way to manipulate the old man, Kitty. Get Myron off my back and maybe we will want to live near you. Keep him bugging us and we move across the country. “Why now? Why did they come back home after all these years?”
“I don’t know. I didn’t ask.”
“Dad, I know you like to give your kids privacy, but I think you’re taking this not-interfering thing a little too far.”
He chuckled at that. “You have to give them room, Myron. I never told you how I felt about Jessica, for example.”
Again with his old girlfriend. “Wait, I thought you liked Jessica.”
“She was bad news,” Dad said.
“But you never said anything.”
“It wasn’t my place.”
“Maybe you should have,” Myron said. “Maybe it would have saved me a lot of heartache.”
Dad shook his head. “I would do anything to protect you”—he almost glanced outside, having proved the point mere minutes ago—“but the best way to do that is to let you make your own mistakes. A mistake-proof life is not worth living.”
“So I just let it go?”
“For now, yes. Brad knows you reached out—Kitty will tell him. I e-mailed him too. If he wants to reach back, he will.”
Myron flashed to another memory: Brad, age seven, getting bullied at sleepaway camp. Myron remembered Brad just sitting out by the old softball field by himself. Brad had made the last out and the bullies had taunted en masse. Myron tried to sit with him but Brad just kept crying and telling Myron to go away. It was one of those times you feel so helpless you’d kill to make the pain go away. He remembered another time, when the entire Bolitar family went to Miami during the February school break. He and Brad shared a hotel room, and one night, after a fun-filled day at the Parrot Jungle, Myron asked him about school and Brad broke down and cried and said that he hated it and had no friends and it broke Myron’s heart in about a thousand places. The next day, sitting out by the pool, Myron asked Dad what he should do about it. His father’s advice had been simple: “Don’t raise it. Don’t make him sad now. Just let him enjoy his vacation.”
Brad had been gawky, awkward, a later bloomer. Or maybe it had just been growing up behind Myron.
“I thought you wanted us to reconcile,” Myron said.
“I do. But you can’t force it. Give them room.”
His father was still breathing hard from the earlier altercation. There was no reason to get him all upset now. It could wait until the morning. But then: “Kitty is using drugs,” Myron said.
Dad raised an eyebrow. “You know this?”
“Yes.”
Dad rubbed his chin and considered this new development. Then: “You still need to leave them alone.”
“Are you serious?”
“Did you know that at one point your mother was addicted to painkillers?”
Myron said nothing, stunned.
“It’s getting late,” Dad said. He started to get up from the couch. “You okay?”
“Wait, you’re just going to drop this bomb on me and walk away?”
“It wasn’t a big deal. That’s my point. We worked it out.”
Myron didn’t know what to say. He also wondered what Dad would make of it if he told him about Kitty’s sex act in the nightclub, and man, he hoped that Dad wouldn’t use another Mom-did-same analogy on that one.
Give it a rest for the night, Myron thought. No reason to do anything hasty. There will be nothing new until daylight. They heard a car pull into the driveway and then the sound of a car door slamming shut.
“That will be your mother.” Al Bolitar rose gingerly. Myron stood too. “Don’t tell her about tonight. I don’t want her worrying.”
“Okay. Hey, Dad?”
“Yes?”
“Nice tackle out there.”
Dad tried not to smile. Myron looked at the aging face. He had that overwhelming feeling, the melancholy one he got when he realized that his parents were getting older. He wanted to say more, wanted to thank him, but he knew that his father knew all that and that any additional discussion on the subject would be unseemly or superfluous. Let the moment alone. Let it breathe.
19
At two thirty A.M., Myron headed upstairs to that same childhood bedroom he’d shared with Brad, the one that still had the Tot Finder sticker on the window, and flipped on the computer.
He logged on to Skype. The screen opened on Terese’s face, and as always, he felt the heady rush and, yep, the lightness in his chest.
“God, you’re beautiful,” he said.
Terese smiled. “May I speak frankly?”
“Please.”
“You are the sexiest man I’ve ever known, and right now, just looking at you is driving me up a wall.”
Myron sat up a little taller. Talk about the perfect medicine. “I’m trying very hard not to preen,” he said. “And I’m not even sure what preening is.”
“May I continue to be frank?” she asked.
“Please.”
“I would be willing to try, uh, something via video, but I don’t quite get it, do you?”
“I confess I don’t.”
“Does that make us old-fashioned? I don’t get computer sex or phone sex or any of that.”
“I tried phone sex once,” Myron said.
“And?”
“And I never felt so self-conscious in my life. I started laughing at a particularly inopportune stage.”
“Okay, so we’re in agreement.”
“Yep.”
“You’re not just saying that? Because, you know, I mean, I know we’re far apart—”
“I’m not just saying that.”
“Good,” Terese said. “So what’s going on over there?”
“How much time do you have?” Myron asked.
“Maybe another twenty minutes.”
“How about we spend ten of it just talking like this and then I’ll tell you?”
Even through a computer monitor, Terese looked at him as though he were the only man in the world. Everything vanished. There was just the two of them. “That bad?” she said.
