She looks over at her grumbling husband and rolls her eyes. “He’ll get over it. You need me.”
She doesn’t let up. Not when Melissa walks over and joins. Not when Dee shuffles under my arm and burrows close to Izzy. And not even when Chelcie brings up the rear and wraps her arms around the three other girls. Each of them at one time was just as lost as I was. I’ve watched, helped, and cheered silently from the shadows as each of them overcame and thrived with one of my brothers.
Hope. Trust in the unknown. And love. It’s been right in front of me for so long, but I’ve been too blind to see it.
I close my eyes and let my guard down. Then I take the masks and shields I’ve used as tools to keep others out and throw them away. With a deep shudder, my breath catching and my arms tightening around the each of the women in my life who have loved every dark piece of me, I allow myself to break.
Their arms get tighter, and together, they help me hold myself up. Help me let it out without judgment and give me the time I need to express my pain.
I open my eyes, the wetness falling from my lids and rolling down my cheeks. When I meet each of my brothers’ eyes, I see their understanding and support trained my way. All four of them give me a tip of their chins and turn their attention back to each other—allowing me this moment.
Thirty minutes later, the women back next to their husbands—and since Sway walked in during the tail end of their hugs, I just detached him from my body seconds before—the doctor comes into the room.
“The family of Ms. Keeze?” he asks the room.
I move quickly and stand before him. “Maddox. Husband,” I say in way of greeting.
He scans the room before addressing me again. “Is there somewhere we can speak privately?”
“This is her family, Doctor, so anything you need to tell me can be said right here.”
“Very well. Your wife is resting as comfortably as possible at the moment. X-rays show that she has a fracture to her ulna, and although it’s stabilized, the swelling is too great for her to be placed in a cast at the moment. She has also has a transverse tibia fracture. The swelling issue is also present. Both will be placed in a cast as soon as possible. Her throat will be sore for a few days. There isn’t any internal damage. However, she was complaining about the pain. I placed two stitches to the laceration on her temple. All things considered, your wife is a very lucky woman.”
My mind is racing to make sense of her injuries. I understand, at some level, what he is trying to say to me, but I can’t compute it until I see her.
“Do you have any questions for me?”
“I need to see her.”
“She’s just being moved to her room now. How about we take a walk and we can go over those questions.”
I nod and mutely follow behind. He goes over her injuries in more detail and tells me that she will need to be admitted for observation and hopefully her swelling will be down enough for her cast to be placed by morning.
“I understand that you rode in with her, but it’s been a few hours and her bruising had gotten a little worse. Be prepared, Mr. Keeze—she isn’t going to look like the woman you brought in here. The bruising will fade. The bones will heal. She’s alive.”
He gives me a moment. I slow my breathing and will my heart to calm before it beats out of my chest. With a shaking hand, I push open her door and step into the room. When I see her battered face for the first time, a deep rumble bursts through my chest. I push it down and focus on being there for her. Hesitantly, I walk forward. Then I take the chair placed on her right side and reach out for her slim hand. Feeling the warmth against my skin is the green light my soul has been waiting for.
I drop my head to the bed, next to her hip, and press my lips to her fingers.
The bed shakes with my heaving breaths. I let it all out, prepared to stuff my pain back inside when she wakes and be the strength she now needs.
“I love you,” I whisper hoarsely against her skin, closing my eyes tight and vowing to God for the first time in too many years to be the man she deserves.
Chapter 24—Emmy
I don’t want to move. I keep my eyes closed long after I heard him whisper those three words, their meaning filling my body, effortlessly picking up the pieces of my heart, which I thought would be forever broken.
Turning my head and ignoring the soreness in my neck, I open my eyes. The lighting in the hospital room causes me to blink a few times, the tint on the windows keeping the sunlight from being to harsh, but my dry eyes take a few moments to adjust. My body hurts, but the majority of my pain is coming from my arm and my leg. I know from before the doctor brought me in here that I broke both my left arm and leg. Other than some other minor injuries, I’m fine—all things considered.
Having Maddox here is just the medicine I need. Well, that and the high dose of pain meds they pushed through my IV thirty minutes before. I’m sure my pain level would be quite different had I not gotten those.
Moving my eyes down to where I feel him against my side, I take in his hunched over form. His large frame is folded in the plastic chair, both tan hands wrapped around my much paler one, his head lying against the mattress so that his mouth is resting next to my fingers. His eyes are closed, and if it weren’t for the wet tear streaks falling down his cheeks, I wouldn’t even think he was awake. Even though he’s hurting, he’s more at peace in this moment that I’ve ever seen him.
“Hey,” I mumble. My voice is deeper and rougher than normal.
When he hears me speak, he jerks up in his seat—eyes wide and hopeful. “God…”
He doesn’t say anything else, so I give him a small smile, trying to let him know that I’m okay.
“Do you need the nurse?”
I shake my head.
“Water?” His brow crinkles, and if he weren’t still holding my hand in a death grip, I would run my fingers over them.
Again, I shake my head, causing his frown to deepen.
“Bathroom?”
“Stop, Mad. I’m good. I have everything I need right here next to me,” I sigh. It takes me a little while to get the words out—my throat rawer than I thought. “I just need you.”
She doesn’t let up. Not when Melissa walks over and joins. Not when Dee shuffles under my arm and burrows close to Izzy. And not even when Chelcie brings up the rear and wraps her arms around the three other girls. Each of them at one time was just as lost as I was. I’ve watched, helped, and cheered silently from the shadows as each of them overcame and thrived with one of my brothers.
Hope. Trust in the unknown. And love. It’s been right in front of me for so long, but I’ve been too blind to see it.
I close my eyes and let my guard down. Then I take the masks and shields I’ve used as tools to keep others out and throw them away. With a deep shudder, my breath catching and my arms tightening around the each of the women in my life who have loved every dark piece of me, I allow myself to break.
Their arms get tighter, and together, they help me hold myself up. Help me let it out without judgment and give me the time I need to express my pain.
I open my eyes, the wetness falling from my lids and rolling down my cheeks. When I meet each of my brothers’ eyes, I see their understanding and support trained my way. All four of them give me a tip of their chins and turn their attention back to each other—allowing me this moment.
Thirty minutes later, the women back next to their husbands—and since Sway walked in during the tail end of their hugs, I just detached him from my body seconds before—the doctor comes into the room.
“The family of Ms. Keeze?” he asks the room.
I move quickly and stand before him. “Maddox. Husband,” I say in way of greeting.
He scans the room before addressing me again. “Is there somewhere we can speak privately?”
“This is her family, Doctor, so anything you need to tell me can be said right here.”
“Very well. Your wife is resting as comfortably as possible at the moment. X-rays show that she has a fracture to her ulna, and although it’s stabilized, the swelling is too great for her to be placed in a cast at the moment. She has also has a transverse tibia fracture. The swelling issue is also present. Both will be placed in a cast as soon as possible. Her throat will be sore for a few days. There isn’t any internal damage. However, she was complaining about the pain. I placed two stitches to the laceration on her temple. All things considered, your wife is a very lucky woman.”
My mind is racing to make sense of her injuries. I understand, at some level, what he is trying to say to me, but I can’t compute it until I see her.
“Do you have any questions for me?”
“I need to see her.”
“She’s just being moved to her room now. How about we take a walk and we can go over those questions.”
I nod and mutely follow behind. He goes over her injuries in more detail and tells me that she will need to be admitted for observation and hopefully her swelling will be down enough for her cast to be placed by morning.
“I understand that you rode in with her, but it’s been a few hours and her bruising had gotten a little worse. Be prepared, Mr. Keeze—she isn’t going to look like the woman you brought in here. The bruising will fade. The bones will heal. She’s alive.”
He gives me a moment. I slow my breathing and will my heart to calm before it beats out of my chest. With a shaking hand, I push open her door and step into the room. When I see her battered face for the first time, a deep rumble bursts through my chest. I push it down and focus on being there for her. Hesitantly, I walk forward. Then I take the chair placed on her right side and reach out for her slim hand. Feeling the warmth against my skin is the green light my soul has been waiting for.
I drop my head to the bed, next to her hip, and press my lips to her fingers.
The bed shakes with my heaving breaths. I let it all out, prepared to stuff my pain back inside when she wakes and be the strength she now needs.
“I love you,” I whisper hoarsely against her skin, closing my eyes tight and vowing to God for the first time in too many years to be the man she deserves.
Chapter 24—Emmy
I don’t want to move. I keep my eyes closed long after I heard him whisper those three words, their meaning filling my body, effortlessly picking up the pieces of my heart, which I thought would be forever broken.
Turning my head and ignoring the soreness in my neck, I open my eyes. The lighting in the hospital room causes me to blink a few times, the tint on the windows keeping the sunlight from being to harsh, but my dry eyes take a few moments to adjust. My body hurts, but the majority of my pain is coming from my arm and my leg. I know from before the doctor brought me in here that I broke both my left arm and leg. Other than some other minor injuries, I’m fine—all things considered.
Having Maddox here is just the medicine I need. Well, that and the high dose of pain meds they pushed through my IV thirty minutes before. I’m sure my pain level would be quite different had I not gotten those.
Moving my eyes down to where I feel him against my side, I take in his hunched over form. His large frame is folded in the plastic chair, both tan hands wrapped around my much paler one, his head lying against the mattress so that his mouth is resting next to my fingers. His eyes are closed, and if it weren’t for the wet tear streaks falling down his cheeks, I wouldn’t even think he was awake. Even though he’s hurting, he’s more at peace in this moment that I’ve ever seen him.
“Hey,” I mumble. My voice is deeper and rougher than normal.
When he hears me speak, he jerks up in his seat—eyes wide and hopeful. “God…”
He doesn’t say anything else, so I give him a small smile, trying to let him know that I’m okay.
“Do you need the nurse?”
I shake my head.
“Water?” His brow crinkles, and if he weren’t still holding my hand in a death grip, I would run my fingers over them.
Again, I shake my head, causing his frown to deepen.
“Bathroom?”
“Stop, Mad. I’m good. I have everything I need right here next to me,” I sigh. It takes me a little while to get the words out—my throat rawer than I thought. “I just need you.”
