Love Bites
Chapter 11 Creepy Man and Monster Girl

 Ellen Schreiber

  • Background:
  • Text Font:
  • Text Size:
  • Line Height:
  • Line Break Height:
  • Frame:

Mom I need you! I declared when Alexander dropped me off at my house. Where are you?
I found my parents sitting in the family room. My mom was finishing a scrapbook and my dad was channel surfing.
I need your help I continued.
I already gave you your allowance, my mother said, gluing a border on a photograph.
I dont need money.
    
Im not signing a note asking for you to be dismissed early because you want to watch Dark Shadows. I told you to DVR it.
Mom. This is way important.
Are you suspended? she asked.
No.
Expelled?
I shook my head.
Arrested?
I folded my arms in disgust. Are you finished?
Im all ears, my mom said.
Alexander needs some new furniture for the Mansion.
HmmI suppose you want something Victorian? You never know what you might find at a yard sale.
    
We dont have time to wait for the weekend.
How about Annies Antiques?
No, were doing a makeover. We need to make the Mansion look like our home. Or the neighbors. Or the Mitchells.
My dad came out of his TV coma. Whats going on?
Raven needs some tips on making the Mansion appear morenormal. She wants it to look more like our home.
My father was confused. Our home? But we dont have bats.
Or spiderwebs, my mom said.
Or creaking floors, my dad added.
We do have those upstairs, my mom corrected.
That's true.
    
Are you through? I asked, disgusted with my parents teasing. This has to be done immediately. Where are all your catalogs?
Why all of a sudden do you want to do this makeover? my mom asked.
Alexander is going to have an interview.
How exciting, she replied.
But I wasnt as thrilled. Once the reporter sees what the Mansion looks like, Alexander will be the laughingstock of this town.
I hardly think that will happen.
You just did it yourself. You both were making fun of it. How will he feelwith some reporters comments published throughout town?
For once I had silenced my parents.
See our problem? I asked.
    
Your father and I were just kidding. Youre rightwe really shouldnt have said those things.
But the townthey wont be fooling around. Theyll mean it. You see how Ive been treated for years.
Thats what I dont understand, my dad said. I thought you were all about being yourselfno matter what.
I am.
Then I figured Alexander would be, too.
Of course he is, I said emphatically.
There is no reason, then, my mom said, that Alexander should change who he isor where he lives.
She had a point.
So where is our nonconforming daughter? my dad asked. What has happened to you?
    
We dont want the whole town to know my boyfriends a vampire. That he sleeps in a coffin and has a cellar filled with bottles of blood, okay? I wanted to say.
I was on trial in front of my parents. They waited for the accused to speakto declare if I was guilty of trading in my own belief system. I was asking them to understand why I was changing my whole character in order to impress the very town from which Id been an outcast my entire life.
They were correct. Under normal circumstances, Id never go along with Alexander trying to change who he was. But if the town knew he was a vampire, hed be the one in danger.
Maybe Alexander doesnt want the town to see his real image, I began.
Why? my mom asked.
Its an invasion of his space.
How do you figure that?
    
The Mansion is his studio, his home, his family. Hes already shared his soul in his paintingsdoes he have to share it in a newspaper, too?
My parents agreed. I was beginning to get through to them.
Besides, its not my decision, I said. Its Alexanders. And he wants the Mansion to appear like any other home in Dullsville.
My mothers bewilderment turned to joy. Then I guess Im forced to help you shop.
Jameson and I are going to pick up the furniture after school. I just dont know where to begin, and I thought youd be great in giving me some ideas.
Come into my private stash. I followed my mom into her bedroom.
Where a man might have stashed Playboys, my mom had hidden her Pottery Barns. She reached underneath her bed and pulled out a large plastic container.
I have every issue from every home store.
    
We hunkered down on her bed like two girls at a sleepover. We spread out the catalogs and pored over the slick pages.
Rugs are a great accent. Framed pictures can make a statement. Clocks can really be striking. She noted pages with Post-its, and with a thick black marker I circled items that reminded me of Trevors home.
I was hoping for a day like this since you were a little girl, she said, for decorating your roombut Ill settle for decorating Alexanders.
Jameson and I were armed with catalogs and a credit card. We had to go to the one place Id never imagined the Creepy Man would ever escort me tothe mall.
It was an understatement to say that we were an odd pair. Elderly mall walkers, tweens with cell phones and Vera Bradley backpacks, kissing couples, and families filled the food court. There was only one bald butler and morbidly dressed girl.
We entered a home store Id only been in when I was being dragged by my mother and the mall benches were already occupied.
We were immediately confronted by a friendly woman with a rock star headset. Do you need help? she asked sincerely.
You could say that, I said. Wed like to purchase a few things for the home.
Her forehead wrinkled as she tried to assess the couple who stood before her. Uncle and niece? Father and daughter? Boyfriend and young girlfriend?
By the expression on her face, I think she settled for Creepy Man and Monster Girl.
Its not for my home, I reassured her. Its for his home.
All right, then. The saleswoman did her best to hide her discomfort.
Miss? Jameson asked.
Lauren.
    
Miss Lauren, he began in a soft and velvety Romanian accent, I am so delighted that you will be helping us. I can tell you have impeccable taste.
Lauren was immediately captured by the Creepy Mans compliment. Thank you, she gushed.
And, Miss Lauren, we need to have these delivered quickly, Jameson told her.
If its in stock, we can have it delivered the next day.
Then lead me to those items, he said.
Lauren guided us around the store like a docent in a fine arts museum.
We picked out a few rugs, a desk and hutch, and furniture covers. She showed us a dozen lamps and pushed one long hanging rug after another until Jameson found one he liked.
I had a blast shopping with the Creepy Man. My mom usually took ages to decide between two varieties of the same item, then, after deciding on the most perfect one, went to another store, only to finally come back to the original and buy it, while Jameson instantaneously picked out furniture, rugs, and accessories.
Lauren rang up our purchases and Jameson handed over his credit card and signed his name.
We left the store with oversized shopping bags like any other normal Dullsvillian.
Now all we needed was a cleaning company.
Alexander wouldnt let me inside until the Mansions makeover was complete. I heard bustling and tried to peek into the window, but the dirt blocked my view.
I was seated on the stoop when I received a text.
Hey Hottie, What are you doing?
The sender was from an unavailable number. I dismissed the call, and as I waited on the stoop, the Mansions door finally creaked open.
Alexander stood as Id never seen him before. He was wearing pressed jeans and an oxford shirt, a brown leather belt and shiny loafers. He was unbearably handsome.
Where is Alexander? I asked.
What do you think? he asked, nervous about my response.
You are gorgeous! Id never imagined you as an insider, I said, checking him out. You look like you belong in a prep school.
Good, thats the look were going for.
The Mansion had been transformed into a spread from Homes & Gardens. Everything seemed completely wrong. With the new slipcovers, the couches appeared brand new and the room clean, sweet-smelling, and free of any unwanted eight-legged insects. Hurricane lamps and framed flowers lined the mantel. Bright yellow and white pillows popped out against white linen-covered chairs.
    
It looks like someone else lives here, I said.
You think so? Sebastian asked, pleased with the results. Alexander will be like any other person living in townonly hell have a butler instead of a few parents. That will accentuate his trust-fund status, he said, thinking out loud.
Youve covered all your bases, I said, noticing that a floor-length candelabra had been replaced with a silver floor lamp. Giles Lunken wont have anything to say, except Hes one of our own.
And, Sebastian began, it gets better. Now theres no need for a photographer.
I followed Sebastian into a roomformerly the parlor, now a studio with desk, computer, and easel.
Its almost finished. I just have to print it out, he said.
Sebastian went to the printer tray and handed me a glossy photo. I held it in my hand.
    
It was a picture of Alexander!
This will be his artists headshot, Sebastian boasted.
I was amazed. For the first time in my life, I held a picture of my vampire boyfriend. I love it! It looks exactly like you!
I used one of my image-enhancement software programs, Sebastian proudly said, and played around with some photographs I found online. I used Johnny Depp and made a few tweaks to bone structure and added pale skin, and voil! Alexander.
It looks like a real photograph. And it looks like you! Can I keep it?
We have to give it to Mr. Lunken for the article. But I can print you another one.
Print a hundred! I ordered.
I was so distracted by finally possessing a photograph of Alexander, I almost forgot that the preppy guy standing in front of me was him.
My boyfriend tugged at the collar of his shirt and fiddled with his shoes. I watched him as he uncomfortably tried to adapt to his new image. He was trying his best to fool even himself.
We returned to the living room, where he put a log in the fireplace.
You hate it, dont you, I said.
This house is beautifuldont get me wrong, he lamented. And the clothes look great on a guy in a magazine. But
What?
I dont want to let you down.
Me? I said. Ive spent my whole life not conforming. Why would I judge you if you dont feel comfortable in an image that isnt your own?
Because if I dont do itif that reporter snoops around or it slips out that I sleep in a coffinthat I drink blood for breakfast Alexanders voice rose. It is dangerous not only for me, but for you.
I understand. I, too, was afraid Mr. Lunken would find out and reveal Alexanders true identity. But mostly for Alexanders sake.
Im not sure you do. Is this the life you really want, Raven? The one youve desired all your life? Or is it just about the fantasy of it?
What do you mean? I asked. Being a vampire had always fascinated me. I knew there were drawbacks, but werent there drawbacks to being mortal?
You are all about showing the world who you truly are. What if you couldnt anymore? he asked sincerely.
It was something I hadnt thought about. Id imagined a life of darkness and mystery, but not one where Id have to hide who I was. I dont know.
Think about it. Me, Sebastian, Jagger, even Luna. Were all in a club that no mortal wants to joinexcept for you.
But
Have you even told your own mother about me? Or Becky?
Of course not. I thought you didnt
I know. I dont. He wandered back to the mantel, stoked the fire, and gazed into the crackling flames shooting from the burning logs. But sometimes I do.
I was speechless. Alexander was so much more complicated than I could ever imagine. I did feel sorry for him. I never hid from others my thoughts and tastes, no matter how outlandish, and yet he had to keep secret everything about his lifestyle.
Sometimes I want your parents to know, he continued. Just be able to be who I am. And not have them be fearful of me. Not have them run away.
I couldnt imagine my parents running from Alexander under any circumstances. Maybe this was my opportunity to let them into his world.
Do you want me to tell them? I moved toward him and drew him in to me.
It will be the end of everythingof our relationship, of my living here.
What if it isnt? I asked excitedly. What if they embrace it? Then neither one of us would have to hide it anymore.
You think your father wants you dating a vampire? A guy who drinks blood to exist?
Theyre former hippies. They might think they were having a flashback.
Im serious. They arent hippies anymore. They are parents of a teenage girl.
Well
He sat down on the sofa. Its been great having Sebastian here.
    
And you. Its been a long time since Ive been able to be myself, apart from being with you.
It was quite the sightAlexander, my once gothic prince, transformed into a handsome quarterback from a boarding school, living in a palatial mansion, pained with loneliness even as I sat right next to him.
This is my life, Raven, whether I have to hide out in a Mansion, live among my kind, or hide out in the Dungeon at the Coffin Club. Its all about secrecy and survival.
Id never been about hiding or not getting in peoples faces. Maybe I couldnt be a vampire after all. Could I take the solitude? Or wandering around like Sebastian, trying to find those who were like me?
I felt Alexander was pushing me awaynot from him, but from the fantasy of being a vampire. So if I was to truly be with him, Id have to show him how much I cared for him and push back.
But wed live together, I said. Like your parents do. I just want to be with youand I just want everyone to love you for who you are, just like I do. But I understandAlexander, I know Im impulsive, but I want whats best for youno matter what that means.
He turned to me, his eyes soulful and his shiny hair glistening. A gorgeous smile emerged from his serious face.
I fixed his collar so it rested flatly. Besides, it is only temporary. But dont be mad at me if I slip and call you Trevor.
Alexander didnt find my joke amusing, and he rose.
I didnt mean to I started.
He didnt speak but shook his head.
Im sorry. I was just teasing.
Noyoure right. This isnt how I live. And most important, this isnt who I am. He unbuttoned his shirt and removed it, exposing a white Cure T-shirt.
I was startled and elated by his bravado. I ran to him and gave him a squeeze so hard I thought Id pushed the air out of him.
Jameson, we have some moving to do, he called.
Sebastian and Jameson entered the room.
Were returning the Mansion and me to our original state, Alexander declared.
What happened? Sebastian asked.
Its just not me. I dont have to come out and say Im a vampire, but on the other hand, I also dont have to be ashamed of being myself.
So what do you want to do now? Jameson asked.
Reschedule the interview. Were going to return the furniture. Immediately.
All of it? Sebastian asked.
Alexander nodded.
    
Jameson shuffled over to Alexander. Can we at least keep this rug?
Alexander smiled. Of course.
And my desk? Sebastian pleaded.
Yes.
Can we keep that outfit? I whispered, coyly tugging at his brown leather belt. Just for fun?
Fine! he reconciled. But everything else goes back. I have an interview to do!