“Preston?”
I nod.
“He was finishing cooldowns when I left, so he shouldn’t be long.”
“Thanks.”
“No worries.” He points down the tunnel toward the field. “There he is now.”
Luke stands center of the tunnel, a silhouette against the bright backdrop. “Lane?” he asks.
“Babe! Wait up!” I recognize the voice. I couldn’t not. The voice had been part of Luke’s life for the past six months. Grace appears, ponytail swinging from side to side, another silhouette, and now she’s holding his arm and Luke’s letting her, and I can’t see his face, or hers, because I’m blinded. By the sun. By the rage. By the overwhelming heartache. And it’s as if all air, all life, leave me at once, and my shoulders drop and so does my gaze because I can’t look at them and I feel
So.
Fucking.
Stupid.
“You okay?” Cooper says.
I pick up my bag, the pieces of my shattered heart, and I hate tunnels. There’s no escape. One way leads me to the locker rooms, and the other way leads me to them.
So.
Fucking.
Stupid.
A hand curls around my elbow, Cooper’s, and he says, his voice low, “I’m trying to work out which one of you is the woman scorned.”
“Fuck off.”
Footsteps get louder and louder, echoing off the stupid walls of the stupid tunnel, and I’m angry and terrified all at once. Cooper puts his arm around my shoulders and says, “I’ll give you a ride home, okay?” And he leads me away, using his body as my barrier, and Luke says nothing as we pass him. Not a damn thing. I get in Cooper’s tiny red sports car, a Porsche or a Lamborghini or some other obnoxious car his parents gifted him when he turned sixteen. Or maybe it’s not the same car. Whatever.
“You want to talk about it?” he asks.
The last thing I want to do is talk about it.
He drives, and by the time I push aside the rage enough to look at the time, an entire hour has passed. “You’ve been driving for an hour?” I yell.
Cooper laughs. “Well, I asked where you lived and you didn’t respond, so I’ve just been driving.”
“You’re an idiot.”
He laughs again. “Okay. I’m the idiot.”
“What are you even doing here?”
“I’m giving you a ride home.”
“I don’t mean here, in the car.” I’m mad at him for existing. “I mean, why were you at the school?”
He shrugs. “Community service.”
“Your parents’ credit card bounced, so you held up a liquor store?”
“I like how you think you know me, Lois Lane.”
“Don’t call me that.”
He changes gears, changes lanes. We’re on a highway. He’s taking me somewhere far away and he’s going to kill me. Well, at least I won’t die a virgin. He says, “So only guys who treat you like their personal fuck toy get to have nicknames for you?”
I scrunch my nose. “You’re a pig.”
“And you’re mean.”
I roll my eyes.
He smiles. “I feel like we got off on the wrong foot.” He extends his hand. “I’m Cooper Kennedy. And you are?”
I reluctantly shake his hand. “Lois Sanders.”
His smile widens. “The girl with the blue dress and bright red cowboy boots…”
“What are you talking about?”
“It was the dress you wore the first day of your freshman year.”
“You’re kidding…”
“My eyes don’t lie, Lois Sanders.” He winks. A little creepy. “So Lucas did a number on you, huh?”
I press my lips tight.
“And let me guess. You’re feeling pretty damn stupid right now.”
So.
Fucking.
Stupid.
PAST | LOIS
“So Cam and Lucy want to take us to the movies tomorrow night. Do you want to go?” Lucas asked, laying across my bed, baseball mitt in one hand, throwing a ball in the air with the other.
“Why?” I ask, turning away from my mirror on the dresser and facing him. Dad said I was too young to wear make-up even though high school started in a couple of days, so he bought me a pack of colored, flavored Lip-Smackers in the hopes we could find a happy medium. The strawberry one was red, made my lips pop and smelled nice, too.
Luke shrugged and rolled over onto his stomach. “I guess they want to celebrate us starting high school or something. If it’s a money thing, I can cover you.”
I smiled. I couldn’t help it. “Like a date?”
“Pshh.” He scoffed, then his features straightened. “I mean. It’s not a date. My sister and her boyfriend will be there so…”
“Okay,” I said, hiding my disappointment. “Only if you’re paying, though, because I spent all my allowance on some new outfits.”
“Oh yeah?” he asked, sitting up, his eyes narrowed. “What kind of outfits?”
“Just stuff more suitable for high school, you know? I can’t walk around in slogan tees forever.”
“I like your slogan tees,” he said.
I smiled again and turned away from him, watching him watch me through the mirror. “You’ve changed,” he stated, his tone very matter-of-fact.
“How?”
He shrugged. “I don’t know.”
“Good or bad?”
“I said I don’t know.”
And just like that, my smile faded.
I wore a new outfit I’d been saving for school. It was a purple dress with black palm tree prints that went to just above my knees and boots that stopped just below them. I’d never owned boots before. At least not ones like those. And I sprayed on perfume my grandmother (on my dad’s side) had sent me for my birthday. So even though Luke had said it wasn’t a date, I treated it like one. I couldn’t help it.
That was my first mistake.
When the doorbell rang at 7:30 pm on the dot, my heart began to race. Dad answered, and I heard them talking. Three voices. Dad, Cam, and Lucas.
They exchanged pleasantries as I made my way up the basement stairs and toward the front door. “Wow,” Cameron said when I came into view.
I rubbed my palms on my dress and smiled at Dad who was smiling at me, the look in his eyes conveying, “my little girl’s all grown up.” And I was. At least, I felt like it.
Cameron whistled, low and slow. “Lane, you look—”
“Overdressed,” Lucas cut in.
My dad’s eyes snapped to his.
“Not in a bad way,” Luke said, hands up in surrender. “I just mean… I feel underdressed is all.”
I quickly forgave him for his earlier comment.
That was mistake number two.
Luke wore khaki shorts and a white polo. He looked nice, even if he didn’t work at it.
“Be good, kids,” Dad said as he closed the door behind us.
“I’m sorry about what I said. I didn’t mean you were overdressed. It’s just…” Luke paused as he opened the door of the minivan for me. “You’re dressed like this is a date or something, and I told you it wasn’t.”
I nod.
“He was finishing cooldowns when I left, so he shouldn’t be long.”
“Thanks.”
“No worries.” He points down the tunnel toward the field. “There he is now.”
Luke stands center of the tunnel, a silhouette against the bright backdrop. “Lane?” he asks.
“Babe! Wait up!” I recognize the voice. I couldn’t not. The voice had been part of Luke’s life for the past six months. Grace appears, ponytail swinging from side to side, another silhouette, and now she’s holding his arm and Luke’s letting her, and I can’t see his face, or hers, because I’m blinded. By the sun. By the rage. By the overwhelming heartache. And it’s as if all air, all life, leave me at once, and my shoulders drop and so does my gaze because I can’t look at them and I feel
So.
Fucking.
Stupid.
“You okay?” Cooper says.
I pick up my bag, the pieces of my shattered heart, and I hate tunnels. There’s no escape. One way leads me to the locker rooms, and the other way leads me to them.
So.
Fucking.
Stupid.
A hand curls around my elbow, Cooper’s, and he says, his voice low, “I’m trying to work out which one of you is the woman scorned.”
“Fuck off.”
Footsteps get louder and louder, echoing off the stupid walls of the stupid tunnel, and I’m angry and terrified all at once. Cooper puts his arm around my shoulders and says, “I’ll give you a ride home, okay?” And he leads me away, using his body as my barrier, and Luke says nothing as we pass him. Not a damn thing. I get in Cooper’s tiny red sports car, a Porsche or a Lamborghini or some other obnoxious car his parents gifted him when he turned sixteen. Or maybe it’s not the same car. Whatever.
“You want to talk about it?” he asks.
The last thing I want to do is talk about it.
He drives, and by the time I push aside the rage enough to look at the time, an entire hour has passed. “You’ve been driving for an hour?” I yell.
Cooper laughs. “Well, I asked where you lived and you didn’t respond, so I’ve just been driving.”
“You’re an idiot.”
He laughs again. “Okay. I’m the idiot.”
“What are you even doing here?”
“I’m giving you a ride home.”
“I don’t mean here, in the car.” I’m mad at him for existing. “I mean, why were you at the school?”
He shrugs. “Community service.”
“Your parents’ credit card bounced, so you held up a liquor store?”
“I like how you think you know me, Lois Lane.”
“Don’t call me that.”
He changes gears, changes lanes. We’re on a highway. He’s taking me somewhere far away and he’s going to kill me. Well, at least I won’t die a virgin. He says, “So only guys who treat you like their personal fuck toy get to have nicknames for you?”
I scrunch my nose. “You’re a pig.”
“And you’re mean.”
I roll my eyes.
He smiles. “I feel like we got off on the wrong foot.” He extends his hand. “I’m Cooper Kennedy. And you are?”
I reluctantly shake his hand. “Lois Sanders.”
His smile widens. “The girl with the blue dress and bright red cowboy boots…”
“What are you talking about?”
“It was the dress you wore the first day of your freshman year.”
“You’re kidding…”
“My eyes don’t lie, Lois Sanders.” He winks. A little creepy. “So Lucas did a number on you, huh?”
I press my lips tight.
“And let me guess. You’re feeling pretty damn stupid right now.”
So.
Fucking.
Stupid.
PAST | LOIS
“So Cam and Lucy want to take us to the movies tomorrow night. Do you want to go?” Lucas asked, laying across my bed, baseball mitt in one hand, throwing a ball in the air with the other.
“Why?” I ask, turning away from my mirror on the dresser and facing him. Dad said I was too young to wear make-up even though high school started in a couple of days, so he bought me a pack of colored, flavored Lip-Smackers in the hopes we could find a happy medium. The strawberry one was red, made my lips pop and smelled nice, too.
Luke shrugged and rolled over onto his stomach. “I guess they want to celebrate us starting high school or something. If it’s a money thing, I can cover you.”
I smiled. I couldn’t help it. “Like a date?”
“Pshh.” He scoffed, then his features straightened. “I mean. It’s not a date. My sister and her boyfriend will be there so…”
“Okay,” I said, hiding my disappointment. “Only if you’re paying, though, because I spent all my allowance on some new outfits.”
“Oh yeah?” he asked, sitting up, his eyes narrowed. “What kind of outfits?”
“Just stuff more suitable for high school, you know? I can’t walk around in slogan tees forever.”
“I like your slogan tees,” he said.
I smiled again and turned away from him, watching him watch me through the mirror. “You’ve changed,” he stated, his tone very matter-of-fact.
“How?”
He shrugged. “I don’t know.”
“Good or bad?”
“I said I don’t know.”
And just like that, my smile faded.
I wore a new outfit I’d been saving for school. It was a purple dress with black palm tree prints that went to just above my knees and boots that stopped just below them. I’d never owned boots before. At least not ones like those. And I sprayed on perfume my grandmother (on my dad’s side) had sent me for my birthday. So even though Luke had said it wasn’t a date, I treated it like one. I couldn’t help it.
That was my first mistake.
When the doorbell rang at 7:30 pm on the dot, my heart began to race. Dad answered, and I heard them talking. Three voices. Dad, Cam, and Lucas.
They exchanged pleasantries as I made my way up the basement stairs and toward the front door. “Wow,” Cameron said when I came into view.
I rubbed my palms on my dress and smiled at Dad who was smiling at me, the look in his eyes conveying, “my little girl’s all grown up.” And I was. At least, I felt like it.
Cameron whistled, low and slow. “Lane, you look—”
“Overdressed,” Lucas cut in.
My dad’s eyes snapped to his.
“Not in a bad way,” Luke said, hands up in surrender. “I just mean… I feel underdressed is all.”
I quickly forgave him for his earlier comment.
That was mistake number two.
Luke wore khaki shorts and a white polo. He looked nice, even if he didn’t work at it.
“Be good, kids,” Dad said as he closed the door behind us.
“I’m sorry about what I said. I didn’t mean you were overdressed. It’s just…” Luke paused as he opened the door of the minivan for me. “You’re dressed like this is a date or something, and I told you it wasn’t.”
