Mini Shopaholic
Page 83
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‘Maybe it’s the department layout,’ suggests a young guy in glasses.
‘Yes, good idea!’ I say quickly.
But Brenda is shaking her head. She’s quite bright, Brenda, that’s the trouble.
‘Customer service is the key, in my opinion,’ she says. ‘You’re obviously pressing the right buttons somewhere. Could I come and observe you for a few days?’
Oh my God. No way do we want Brenda skulking around. She’d instantly realize what we were doing and blab to Trevor.
‘I don’t think so,’ I say hastily. ‘Jasmine and I work very well as a team, with no one else. My worry is that if we start messing with the formula, we might jeopardize the success we’ve got.’
I can see that word ‘jeopardize’ lodge in Trevor’s brain.
‘Well, let’s leave it for now,’ he says heavily. ‘Just keep doing what you’re doing. Good work, everyone.’ He pushes his chair back and looks at me. ‘Danny and Becky, would you like a spot of lunch? We’ve booked a table at Gordon Ramsay, if that suits?’
‘Yes please!’ I say joyfully.
Lunch at Gordon Ramsay with the managing director! Employee of the Year! I am so heading towards the board of directors.
As Trevor takes a call on his mobile, Danny pushes his chair over to mine.
‘So, how’s the party going?’
‘Sssh!’ I glare at him. ‘Not so loud!’
‘Only I was at this fashion bash in Shoreditch last week and I thought of you.’ He offers me some gum. ‘I don’t know what security firm you’re using, but Fifteen Star Security is in really terrible form. The bouncers were, like, totally aggressive and the valet parking was a shambles. So if you’ve booked them, you might want to think again.’
For a moment I can’t quite find an answer.
Bouncers? Valet parking? I haven’t even thought about bouncers and valet parking.
‘Well, I certainly won’t use that company, then,’ I say as convincingly as I can.
‘Cool.’ Danny swings his feet up on to a chair. ‘Who are you using?’
‘I’m just … er … firming up on security arrangements.’
It’s fine. Don’t panic. I’ll just add it to the list. Book bouncers and valet –parking.
‘The restrooms were great, though,’ he adds enthusiastically. ‘They were in a separate tent, and everyone got a foot massage. Are you hiring foot masseurs?’
I can’t reply. I’m too gripped by horror.
Restrooms. Shit. How could I have forgotten those? Was I expecting two hundred people to use Janice’s en suite?
Surreptitiously I write ‘Book loos’ on my hand with a biro.
‘Of course I’m having foot masseurs.’ I try to sound nonchalant. ‘And hand masseurs. And … reiki people.’
I’m not letting some stupid fashion bash in Shoreditch beat my party.
‘Excellent.’ His eyes gleam. ‘And Luke has no idea?’
‘None. And keep your voice down!’
‘Well, that won’t last. No one ever threw a surprise party that was a genuine surprise.’
‘Yes they did!’ I retort crossly, but Danny is shaking his head.
‘Take it from me, Becky. Some moron’ll blab. Hey, look what I made for my god-daughter.’ He pulls out a little tartan T-shirt with “Minnie Rocks” in hot-pink letters.
It’s always the same with Danny. Just as you’re about to clonk him over the head for being so annoying, he does something really sweet and you fall in love with him all over again. I can’t help throwing an arm around him and giving him a hug.
But, oh God. What if he’s right?
*
As I’m arriving home, my mobile rings, and it’s finally Bonnie calling me back.
‘Bonnie!’ I retreat into the bushes. ‘How are you?’
‘I’m well, thank you.’ Bonnie sounds a bit strained, and not like her usual self. ‘All’s well.’
I peer at the phone dubiously. ‘Bonnie, what’s wrong? You sound really hassled.’
‘Well, the truth is …’ Bonnie sighs. ‘Luke didn’t react well when I tried to mention his shower gel just now. In fact, he became quite irritable with me.’
‘Oh, sorry,’ I say guiltily. ‘Well, don’t worry about that any more. It was worth a try. How’s the party going your end?’
‘We’ve had lots more acceptances today! I’ve made a file of all the details and special requests.’
‘Special requests?’ I echo uncertainly.
‘Yes, good idea!’ I say quickly.
But Brenda is shaking her head. She’s quite bright, Brenda, that’s the trouble.
‘Customer service is the key, in my opinion,’ she says. ‘You’re obviously pressing the right buttons somewhere. Could I come and observe you for a few days?’
Oh my God. No way do we want Brenda skulking around. She’d instantly realize what we were doing and blab to Trevor.
‘I don’t think so,’ I say hastily. ‘Jasmine and I work very well as a team, with no one else. My worry is that if we start messing with the formula, we might jeopardize the success we’ve got.’
I can see that word ‘jeopardize’ lodge in Trevor’s brain.
‘Well, let’s leave it for now,’ he says heavily. ‘Just keep doing what you’re doing. Good work, everyone.’ He pushes his chair back and looks at me. ‘Danny and Becky, would you like a spot of lunch? We’ve booked a table at Gordon Ramsay, if that suits?’
‘Yes please!’ I say joyfully.
Lunch at Gordon Ramsay with the managing director! Employee of the Year! I am so heading towards the board of directors.
As Trevor takes a call on his mobile, Danny pushes his chair over to mine.
‘So, how’s the party going?’
‘Sssh!’ I glare at him. ‘Not so loud!’
‘Only I was at this fashion bash in Shoreditch last week and I thought of you.’ He offers me some gum. ‘I don’t know what security firm you’re using, but Fifteen Star Security is in really terrible form. The bouncers were, like, totally aggressive and the valet parking was a shambles. So if you’ve booked them, you might want to think again.’
For a moment I can’t quite find an answer.
Bouncers? Valet parking? I haven’t even thought about bouncers and valet parking.
‘Well, I certainly won’t use that company, then,’ I say as convincingly as I can.
‘Cool.’ Danny swings his feet up on to a chair. ‘Who are you using?’
‘I’m just … er … firming up on security arrangements.’
It’s fine. Don’t panic. I’ll just add it to the list. Book bouncers and valet –parking.
‘The restrooms were great, though,’ he adds enthusiastically. ‘They were in a separate tent, and everyone got a foot massage. Are you hiring foot masseurs?’
I can’t reply. I’m too gripped by horror.
Restrooms. Shit. How could I have forgotten those? Was I expecting two hundred people to use Janice’s en suite?
Surreptitiously I write ‘Book loos’ on my hand with a biro.
‘Of course I’m having foot masseurs.’ I try to sound nonchalant. ‘And hand masseurs. And … reiki people.’
I’m not letting some stupid fashion bash in Shoreditch beat my party.
‘Excellent.’ His eyes gleam. ‘And Luke has no idea?’
‘None. And keep your voice down!’
‘Well, that won’t last. No one ever threw a surprise party that was a genuine surprise.’
‘Yes they did!’ I retort crossly, but Danny is shaking his head.
‘Take it from me, Becky. Some moron’ll blab. Hey, look what I made for my god-daughter.’ He pulls out a little tartan T-shirt with “Minnie Rocks” in hot-pink letters.
It’s always the same with Danny. Just as you’re about to clonk him over the head for being so annoying, he does something really sweet and you fall in love with him all over again. I can’t help throwing an arm around him and giving him a hug.
But, oh God. What if he’s right?
*
As I’m arriving home, my mobile rings, and it’s finally Bonnie calling me back.
‘Bonnie!’ I retreat into the bushes. ‘How are you?’
‘I’m well, thank you.’ Bonnie sounds a bit strained, and not like her usual self. ‘All’s well.’
I peer at the phone dubiously. ‘Bonnie, what’s wrong? You sound really hassled.’
‘Well, the truth is …’ Bonnie sighs. ‘Luke didn’t react well when I tried to mention his shower gel just now. In fact, he became quite irritable with me.’
‘Oh, sorry,’ I say guiltily. ‘Well, don’t worry about that any more. It was worth a try. How’s the party going your end?’
‘We’ve had lots more acceptances today! I’ve made a file of all the details and special requests.’
‘Special requests?’ I echo uncertainly.