More Than Enough
Page 96
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Riley’s eyes narrow at first, as if she’s clicked that I’ve read her letters.
I won’t tell her.
She won’t ask.
Her gaze stays on mine for a long moment while silence fills the yard. Then her eyes drift shut, her chest rising with her intake of breath. Her cheeks puff with the force of her exhale and a second later, it’s over.
Dad clears his throat and all eyes go to him. He raises the beer in his hand. “I uh, I wanted to make a toast to my son.” He waves his hand toward me. “Dylan. Who, we all know. Obviously.” He rubs the back of his neck while Riley squeezes mine. “I’m bad at this so I’ll make it quick…” He looks down at his feet and takes a breath. Then rubs his eyes before looking back up. “I’m so damn proud of you, son. We all are. And I’m glad you’re home safe and now I’m ramblin’ so here,” he says, reaching into his pocket and throwing something at me. I catch it. Ford keys.
“What’s this?” I ask, looking from the keys to him.
“Well, you were deployed on your twenty-first birthday so it’s a little late, but it’s parked out front.”
“You got me a car?” I almost shout.
“You got him a car?” Eric repeats. “Man, I was deployed on my twenty-first and all I got was a damn card with a giraffe on it!”
I practically push Riley off my lap. The guys laugh. “If this is a joke—”
“No joke. And a truck. Not a car. Go check it out!” Dad says.
Eric whines, “A giraffe! What did that even mean?”
Dad didn’t just get me any old truck. He got me my dream truck. The one I’d wanted when I’d turned sixteen but wasn’t able to afford. A black 2005 Ford F150 dual cab. “Holy shit.” I open Riley’s side first so she can get in and then run to the driver’s side. I slip in the key, turn it and then I don’t really know what happens but I’m pretty sure it’s sexual considering everything that goes on in my pants.
I turn to Riley. “Did you know?”
She nods. “He’s been looking since the accident.”
“A giraffe!” Eric shouts.
“So?” Riley says. “Shall we?”
“Right now? What about—”
“My mom’s going to help clean up. It’ll be clear by the time we come home.”
“Home?”
She nods again, scooting across the seat until she’s next to me and my hand instantly goes to her leg. “Our home.”
“And your mom’s okay with us moving out?” I ask, glancing at Holly standing next to Dr. Matthews.
“Yeah. She supports us no matter what.”
My smile matches hers. “So where to?” I put the car in gear.
“Where else?”
“Horizon, it is.”
It’s two in the morning by the time we get home from the drive. And five in the morning when I find myself inhaling deeply, blinking at the reflection in the shattered mirror and wondering why… why the hell would he come to me now? After one of the best days of my life, why fucking haunt me now? It’s been weeks since I’ve seen him. Not since I spent the entire night bleeding my heart out to Holly. I thought it was over.
I was wrong.
His words replay in my head. “I fucking failed, Dylan!” Over and over.
“Babe?” Riley says, sitting up in the bed. “You okay?”
My shoulders tense. So does my jaw. “I’m fine.”
Her hand skims across my side of the bed. She’ll feel the sweat. It’s impossible not to.
I sigh, looking back in the mirror before running the tap and splashing water on my face.
“Are you hot?” Riley asks, now walking toward me. “I can turn the air up.” She grabs a face cloth and sits on the counter next to my arm, then runs it under the cold water.
Her eyes are tired, just like mine.
She wipes the cloth across my forehead, down my neck and onto my shoulders while I breathe through the visions.
“Did you have a bad dream?” she whispers, the towel on my chest now. “I’m sorry,” she adds. “You don’t have to tell me.”
Behind the fatigue, I see the determination in her eyes, the need to make me better somehow.
And I remember the messages from Dave—her promise to take care of me. So I swallow my pride, and I give her what she needs. What she deserves. “Yeah, Ry. I did. And I can’t get back to sleep now.”
Her eyes widen in surprise. “Okay,” she squeaks, sitting up higher. “Is there anything I can do? Do you want me to make you some… I don’t know… warm milk or something? That used to help me when I had nightmares. I know it’s not the same—”
I shift to the side, cutting her off, and place my hands on the counter either side of her. Tilting my head, I ask, “Warm milk?”
She nods quickly. Then, somehow, her eyes get even wider. “Oh, I know!” She raises her finger between us. “Wait here, okay?” She’s smiling. I don’t know why she’s smiling but I love her smile and her need to resolve my pain makes me love her more.
She shoves my chest gently, moving me out the way. “Just wait,” she rushes out, her bare legs moving quickly as she exits the room.
She takes the pillows from the bed, as well as all of the blankets and takes them somewhere out of my vision. Doors open. Doors close. Her feet shuffle across the floor moving around the house. And I wait in the bathroom like she told me to.
“Okay,” she calls out. “You can come out now.”
With heavy steps, I walk out of the bathroom and into the bedroom. She’s sitting against the wall between both rooms, blankets and cushions surrounding her. She taps her lap, her smile soft when she says, “Lie down. Head here.”
My grin is instant. So is the overwhelming calm that washes over me. I lie down on my back, my head on her lap, her hands in my hair as she continues to smile down at me. “Remember this?” she asks.
My eyes drift shut. “I’ll never forget this.”
“You said you liked it.”
“I do.”
“You almost fell asleep when I did it so I thought…”
“You take such good care of me, Ry,” I tell her honestly.
“Really?”
“Swear.”
Her smile widens.
“Tell me something, Riley.”
“Something?”
“Anything. I love your voice. It’s the thing I missed the most while I was deployed. I mean, besides your body. And your cooking.”
She laughs quietly. “So Mom has a date with Dr. Matthews tomorrow. Or tonight, I should say.”
“No shit?”
“Yep. She’s really nervous.”
“Believe me,” I tell her. “He’s worse. I’m surprised he had the balls to ask her.”
“He didn’t. She asked him.”
“That’s awesome.”
“Oh! And apparently when we were gone Eric wouldn’t shut up about you getting a truck and him getting a card so your dad called him out and told everyone that he started wetting the bed again when you were born. He kept thinking you would crawl into his room at night and stab him in his sleep.”
I won’t tell her.
She won’t ask.
Her gaze stays on mine for a long moment while silence fills the yard. Then her eyes drift shut, her chest rising with her intake of breath. Her cheeks puff with the force of her exhale and a second later, it’s over.
Dad clears his throat and all eyes go to him. He raises the beer in his hand. “I uh, I wanted to make a toast to my son.” He waves his hand toward me. “Dylan. Who, we all know. Obviously.” He rubs the back of his neck while Riley squeezes mine. “I’m bad at this so I’ll make it quick…” He looks down at his feet and takes a breath. Then rubs his eyes before looking back up. “I’m so damn proud of you, son. We all are. And I’m glad you’re home safe and now I’m ramblin’ so here,” he says, reaching into his pocket and throwing something at me. I catch it. Ford keys.
“What’s this?” I ask, looking from the keys to him.
“Well, you were deployed on your twenty-first birthday so it’s a little late, but it’s parked out front.”
“You got me a car?” I almost shout.
“You got him a car?” Eric repeats. “Man, I was deployed on my twenty-first and all I got was a damn card with a giraffe on it!”
I practically push Riley off my lap. The guys laugh. “If this is a joke—”
“No joke. And a truck. Not a car. Go check it out!” Dad says.
Eric whines, “A giraffe! What did that even mean?”
Dad didn’t just get me any old truck. He got me my dream truck. The one I’d wanted when I’d turned sixteen but wasn’t able to afford. A black 2005 Ford F150 dual cab. “Holy shit.” I open Riley’s side first so she can get in and then run to the driver’s side. I slip in the key, turn it and then I don’t really know what happens but I’m pretty sure it’s sexual considering everything that goes on in my pants.
I turn to Riley. “Did you know?”
She nods. “He’s been looking since the accident.”
“A giraffe!” Eric shouts.
“So?” Riley says. “Shall we?”
“Right now? What about—”
“My mom’s going to help clean up. It’ll be clear by the time we come home.”
“Home?”
She nods again, scooting across the seat until she’s next to me and my hand instantly goes to her leg. “Our home.”
“And your mom’s okay with us moving out?” I ask, glancing at Holly standing next to Dr. Matthews.
“Yeah. She supports us no matter what.”
My smile matches hers. “So where to?” I put the car in gear.
“Where else?”
“Horizon, it is.”
It’s two in the morning by the time we get home from the drive. And five in the morning when I find myself inhaling deeply, blinking at the reflection in the shattered mirror and wondering why… why the hell would he come to me now? After one of the best days of my life, why fucking haunt me now? It’s been weeks since I’ve seen him. Not since I spent the entire night bleeding my heart out to Holly. I thought it was over.
I was wrong.
His words replay in my head. “I fucking failed, Dylan!” Over and over.
“Babe?” Riley says, sitting up in the bed. “You okay?”
My shoulders tense. So does my jaw. “I’m fine.”
Her hand skims across my side of the bed. She’ll feel the sweat. It’s impossible not to.
I sigh, looking back in the mirror before running the tap and splashing water on my face.
“Are you hot?” Riley asks, now walking toward me. “I can turn the air up.” She grabs a face cloth and sits on the counter next to my arm, then runs it under the cold water.
Her eyes are tired, just like mine.
She wipes the cloth across my forehead, down my neck and onto my shoulders while I breathe through the visions.
“Did you have a bad dream?” she whispers, the towel on my chest now. “I’m sorry,” she adds. “You don’t have to tell me.”
Behind the fatigue, I see the determination in her eyes, the need to make me better somehow.
And I remember the messages from Dave—her promise to take care of me. So I swallow my pride, and I give her what she needs. What she deserves. “Yeah, Ry. I did. And I can’t get back to sleep now.”
Her eyes widen in surprise. “Okay,” she squeaks, sitting up higher. “Is there anything I can do? Do you want me to make you some… I don’t know… warm milk or something? That used to help me when I had nightmares. I know it’s not the same—”
I shift to the side, cutting her off, and place my hands on the counter either side of her. Tilting my head, I ask, “Warm milk?”
She nods quickly. Then, somehow, her eyes get even wider. “Oh, I know!” She raises her finger between us. “Wait here, okay?” She’s smiling. I don’t know why she’s smiling but I love her smile and her need to resolve my pain makes me love her more.
She shoves my chest gently, moving me out the way. “Just wait,” she rushes out, her bare legs moving quickly as she exits the room.
She takes the pillows from the bed, as well as all of the blankets and takes them somewhere out of my vision. Doors open. Doors close. Her feet shuffle across the floor moving around the house. And I wait in the bathroom like she told me to.
“Okay,” she calls out. “You can come out now.”
With heavy steps, I walk out of the bathroom and into the bedroom. She’s sitting against the wall between both rooms, blankets and cushions surrounding her. She taps her lap, her smile soft when she says, “Lie down. Head here.”
My grin is instant. So is the overwhelming calm that washes over me. I lie down on my back, my head on her lap, her hands in my hair as she continues to smile down at me. “Remember this?” she asks.
My eyes drift shut. “I’ll never forget this.”
“You said you liked it.”
“I do.”
“You almost fell asleep when I did it so I thought…”
“You take such good care of me, Ry,” I tell her honestly.
“Really?”
“Swear.”
Her smile widens.
“Tell me something, Riley.”
“Something?”
“Anything. I love your voice. It’s the thing I missed the most while I was deployed. I mean, besides your body. And your cooking.”
She laughs quietly. “So Mom has a date with Dr. Matthews tomorrow. Or tonight, I should say.”
“No shit?”
“Yep. She’s really nervous.”
“Believe me,” I tell her. “He’s worse. I’m surprised he had the balls to ask her.”
“He didn’t. She asked him.”
“That’s awesome.”
“Oh! And apparently when we were gone Eric wouldn’t shut up about you getting a truck and him getting a card so your dad called him out and told everyone that he started wetting the bed again when you were born. He kept thinking you would crawl into his room at night and stab him in his sleep.”