Amanda glared at Chantal, who just laughed. "On the arm. You didn't write it?" She gave Amanda a knowing smirk. "Well. Ain't that something . . ."
I heard Amanda mumble something under her breath, but was too busy looking at my name carved on the wooden arm of the chair. My fingers traced the letters.
"Do you want me to leave?" her voice was so soft I almost didn't hear it.
My head whipped up to face her. "No. Do you want to leave?"
"No." Then she just stood there, her eyes focused on my face. Probably the cut on my lip, and the slight redness on my cheek.
Chantal came back and made an annoyed huffing sound. We both turned to her. "What are you guys doing? You're not twelve." She threw her hands up in the air. "Talk." She placed her hands on Amanda's shoulders and maneuvered her to the seat opposite me. Amanda's gaze never left mine. Chantal pointed at the book and spoke to Amanda, "I got it signed for you."
Amanda finally looked away and up at Chantal. "No you didn't!" she said, with excitement in her voice.
"Yes," Chantal replied. "Look."
Amanda smiled as she opened the book. Fuck, I miss that smile. "Never regret," she breathed out, and then looked up at Chantal in awe. Chantal smiled back. "Never regret," she repeated.
She kept her eyes on the book for a while, her smile getting wider with each second.
"You come here a lot?" I asked her, but then rolled my eyes at myself. Lame.
"Why, Logan," she smirked and put the book in her bag, "you've lost your game. That was a horrible pick up line."
I couldn't help but laugh. So did she. And somehow, in that one moment, the world tilted on its axis and the atmosphere became something closer to normal.
"I do, actually." She fidgeted with a bunch of bracelets on her wrists, and then placed them under the table. "Whenever I get a chance, between classes and what-not."
I nodded, thankful she was speaking to me.
"So," she started, looking around the store. "I assume you’re going back to UNC?"
"Yeah," I told her. "Next semester I start back, so I'll be a year behind."
She smiled softly. "How come you moved out here now, then? Why not after summer break?"
I felt the tension leave my muscles. She was talking to me; we were talking to each other. Things would be okay. "I wanted to get in early and find a place. I know it becomes harder the closer we get to the school year."
She was about to speak, but Chantal cut her off by placing a bowl on the table: red Gummy Bears and ice cream.
Amanda's eyes went wide, and then a smile formed on her lips. "How did she know?" she asked me, bringing the bowl closer to her.
I shrugged. "No clue."
"Liar."
I laughed.
"What happened to your face?" Chantal asked. I forgot she was standing there.
Amanda choked.
"Nothing," I said.
Amanda coughed some more.
Chantal eyed me, and then Amanda. "Nothing?" She raised her eyebrows.
Amanda calmed herself down. "I slapped him," she answered for me.
Chantal placed her hands on her hips. "Well, did you deserve it?" she asked me.
"Yes," I answered, the same time as Amanda said, "No."
Chantal shook her head, and walked away.
Amanda put the bowl to the side and leaned forward with her elbows on the table. "You didn't deserve that, Logan. I'm so sorry. I don't know what came over me. I should have never laid a hand on you."
"It's fine. It really—"
"It's not fine. It's never fine." She reached out and pulled on my shirt until my position mimicked hers. Our faces so close I felt her exhale of breath against my skin. Then I felt her hand on my cheek. My eyes drifted shut. Her thumb skimmed my lip. "Does it hurt?"
I covered her hand with mine and brought my face closer to hers. I kept my eyes closed. I didn't want to see her pull away. Our noses rubbed against each other.
My heart pounded.
My hand trembled.
"You're shaking," she whispered.
Shit. "Mm," was all I could say.
She placed my hand between both of hers and pulled away. I wanted to tell her to stay. I wanted her to be closer. "Are you okay?" she asked.
"Mm," I said again.
I felt her bring my hand up, and press her mouth on my palm. She kissed it once, twice—by the third kiss it'd stopped shaking.
And I knew it then.
I knew she had the power to make everything better. That's why I needed her, but it was more than that. It was so much more than that.
I opened my eyes slowly, and that's when I saw it.
The mark on her wrist.
She must've noticed because she started to pull away. I gripped it and moved her bracelets so I could see it clearly.
And then I gasped. Like a fucking girl.
"What is this?" My eyes left her wrist and moved to her face.
She looked sick, like she was going to puke. She pulled her arm out of my grasp and stood up. "I gotta go."
She rushed for the front door.
I wanted to yell out. I wanted to stop her.
But I didn't do shit.
I just let her walk away.
What the fuck had happened while I was gone?
12
Logan
Another sleepless night. I couldn't get her out of my head. Honestly, she was always in my head. She'd only been in my life again for two days. Two fucking days, and this was the effect she was having on me. I had to keep reminding myself that she wasn't mine, and that it was my choice.
There was a knock on my door. No one knew I was back. No one knew where I lived. Only Amanda. I stood up and rushed to the door so fast my head spun. Way too excitedly, I opened it, but it wasn't Amanda.
She was pissed.
I grimaced.
"You fucking asshole." She shoved me hard against my chest.
"Nice to see you, too."
"No!" she yelled, hitting my chest a few times.
I tried to block her, but she was adamant on contact. "Fuck, what is with people hitting me?"
She stopped, her fist raised mid punch, but then narrowed her eyes. "You deserve it this time." She got in a few more hits before she started to cry. "I was so worried about you, Logan. Nobody knew anything, and you've been here. Why didn't you call me? Email . . . anything?" Her body slumped, as she wiped frantically at her tears.
"I'm an asshole, Lucy. I'm sorry. Come here." I brought her in for a hug. She resisted at first, but eventually gave in.
"I hate you," she said, and then I heard her sniff. "I missed you so damn much."
Ten minutes later, after I'd finally settled her down enough, she spoke, "How come no one knows you're here?"
I shrugged. "I just want to lay low for a bit. You can't tell anyone I'm here, Luce. Not even Cameron."
Her eyes went wide. "Well, that's going to be tough."
"Try, okay?"
She nodded.
"How did you even know I was here?"
I heard Amanda mumble something under her breath, but was too busy looking at my name carved on the wooden arm of the chair. My fingers traced the letters.
"Do you want me to leave?" her voice was so soft I almost didn't hear it.
My head whipped up to face her. "No. Do you want to leave?"
"No." Then she just stood there, her eyes focused on my face. Probably the cut on my lip, and the slight redness on my cheek.
Chantal came back and made an annoyed huffing sound. We both turned to her. "What are you guys doing? You're not twelve." She threw her hands up in the air. "Talk." She placed her hands on Amanda's shoulders and maneuvered her to the seat opposite me. Amanda's gaze never left mine. Chantal pointed at the book and spoke to Amanda, "I got it signed for you."
Amanda finally looked away and up at Chantal. "No you didn't!" she said, with excitement in her voice.
"Yes," Chantal replied. "Look."
Amanda smiled as she opened the book. Fuck, I miss that smile. "Never regret," she breathed out, and then looked up at Chantal in awe. Chantal smiled back. "Never regret," she repeated.
She kept her eyes on the book for a while, her smile getting wider with each second.
"You come here a lot?" I asked her, but then rolled my eyes at myself. Lame.
"Why, Logan," she smirked and put the book in her bag, "you've lost your game. That was a horrible pick up line."
I couldn't help but laugh. So did she. And somehow, in that one moment, the world tilted on its axis and the atmosphere became something closer to normal.
"I do, actually." She fidgeted with a bunch of bracelets on her wrists, and then placed them under the table. "Whenever I get a chance, between classes and what-not."
I nodded, thankful she was speaking to me.
"So," she started, looking around the store. "I assume you’re going back to UNC?"
"Yeah," I told her. "Next semester I start back, so I'll be a year behind."
She smiled softly. "How come you moved out here now, then? Why not after summer break?"
I felt the tension leave my muscles. She was talking to me; we were talking to each other. Things would be okay. "I wanted to get in early and find a place. I know it becomes harder the closer we get to the school year."
She was about to speak, but Chantal cut her off by placing a bowl on the table: red Gummy Bears and ice cream.
Amanda's eyes went wide, and then a smile formed on her lips. "How did she know?" she asked me, bringing the bowl closer to her.
I shrugged. "No clue."
"Liar."
I laughed.
"What happened to your face?" Chantal asked. I forgot she was standing there.
Amanda choked.
"Nothing," I said.
Amanda coughed some more.
Chantal eyed me, and then Amanda. "Nothing?" She raised her eyebrows.
Amanda calmed herself down. "I slapped him," she answered for me.
Chantal placed her hands on her hips. "Well, did you deserve it?" she asked me.
"Yes," I answered, the same time as Amanda said, "No."
Chantal shook her head, and walked away.
Amanda put the bowl to the side and leaned forward with her elbows on the table. "You didn't deserve that, Logan. I'm so sorry. I don't know what came over me. I should have never laid a hand on you."
"It's fine. It really—"
"It's not fine. It's never fine." She reached out and pulled on my shirt until my position mimicked hers. Our faces so close I felt her exhale of breath against my skin. Then I felt her hand on my cheek. My eyes drifted shut. Her thumb skimmed my lip. "Does it hurt?"
I covered her hand with mine and brought my face closer to hers. I kept my eyes closed. I didn't want to see her pull away. Our noses rubbed against each other.
My heart pounded.
My hand trembled.
"You're shaking," she whispered.
Shit. "Mm," was all I could say.
She placed my hand between both of hers and pulled away. I wanted to tell her to stay. I wanted her to be closer. "Are you okay?" she asked.
"Mm," I said again.
I felt her bring my hand up, and press her mouth on my palm. She kissed it once, twice—by the third kiss it'd stopped shaking.
And I knew it then.
I knew she had the power to make everything better. That's why I needed her, but it was more than that. It was so much more than that.
I opened my eyes slowly, and that's when I saw it.
The mark on her wrist.
She must've noticed because she started to pull away. I gripped it and moved her bracelets so I could see it clearly.
And then I gasped. Like a fucking girl.
"What is this?" My eyes left her wrist and moved to her face.
She looked sick, like she was going to puke. She pulled her arm out of my grasp and stood up. "I gotta go."
She rushed for the front door.
I wanted to yell out. I wanted to stop her.
But I didn't do shit.
I just let her walk away.
What the fuck had happened while I was gone?
12
Logan
Another sleepless night. I couldn't get her out of my head. Honestly, she was always in my head. She'd only been in my life again for two days. Two fucking days, and this was the effect she was having on me. I had to keep reminding myself that she wasn't mine, and that it was my choice.
There was a knock on my door. No one knew I was back. No one knew where I lived. Only Amanda. I stood up and rushed to the door so fast my head spun. Way too excitedly, I opened it, but it wasn't Amanda.
She was pissed.
I grimaced.
"You fucking asshole." She shoved me hard against my chest.
"Nice to see you, too."
"No!" she yelled, hitting my chest a few times.
I tried to block her, but she was adamant on contact. "Fuck, what is with people hitting me?"
She stopped, her fist raised mid punch, but then narrowed her eyes. "You deserve it this time." She got in a few more hits before she started to cry. "I was so worried about you, Logan. Nobody knew anything, and you've been here. Why didn't you call me? Email . . . anything?" Her body slumped, as she wiped frantically at her tears.
"I'm an asshole, Lucy. I'm sorry. Come here." I brought her in for a hug. She resisted at first, but eventually gave in.
"I hate you," she said, and then I heard her sniff. "I missed you so damn much."
Ten minutes later, after I'd finally settled her down enough, she spoke, "How come no one knows you're here?"
I shrugged. "I just want to lay low for a bit. You can't tell anyone I'm here, Luce. Not even Cameron."
Her eyes went wide. "Well, that's going to be tough."
"Try, okay?"
She nodded.
"How did you even know I was here?"