My Soul to Steal
Page 10
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But I couldnt just forget about everything hed done. If I took him back before I was sure we were both ready, we could fall apart for real. Forever. Rushing in could ruin everything for both of us.
Of course, so could Sabine.
Im glad. Thats really good, Nash, I said, hating how lame I sounded. Did Hallmark make a card for former addict ex-boyfriends who were trying to stay clean?
Sowhat did you want to talk about? he asked, as I clung to the strap of my backpack like a life preserver. Why was I so nervous?
I just I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, then made myself look at him. How worried should I be about Sabine?
At the mention of her name, Nashs irises exploded into motion, swirling so fast I couldnt interpret what he was feeling. And with sudden, frightening insight, I realized that was because he didnt know what he was feeling. Probably several conflicting emotions. But whatever they were, they were strong.
Worried about her? His irises went suddenly still, as he slammed the lid shut on his emotions, blocking me out. I couldnt blame him. Who wants to walk around looking like a giant mood ring? But I was desperate for a hint of what he really felt about her. And about me. I needed to know where I stood. Why would you
But before he could finish, she was suddenly there, down the hall, shouting his name like she didnt care who heard. Or who turned to stare.
Sabine was fearless.
Nash! She jogged down the hall toward us, bag bouncing on her back, low-cut khakis barely hanging on to her hips. As she came to a stop, she reached into her hip pocket and pulled out a cell phone. Nashs cell phone. You left this in my car. You know, you should really set it to autolock. Otherwise, all your informations just there for the taking Instead of handing him the phone, she stepped close and slid it slowly into his front left pocket, letting her fingers linger until he actually had to pull her hand from his pocket. Right there in the hall.
My face flamed. I could feel my cheeks burning and could see a scarlet half-moon at the bottom edge of my vision.
Umthanks, Nash said.
Anytime, she purred, then finally seemed to notice me standing there. Hey, Katie, whats up? Her black eyes stared into mine, and I flashed back to my dream from the night before. Chill bumps popped up beneath my sleeves, and if I didnt know any better, Id swear the fluorescent light overhead flickered just to cast deep shadows beneath her eyes.
It was everything I could do not to shudder. Something was wrong with her. How could Nash not see it? Looking into Sabines eyes was like taking a breath with my head stuck inside the freezer.
Its Kaylee, I said throughgritted teeth, forcing the words out when what I really wanted was to excuse myself and walk away. Fast. And we were talking.
Oh, good! She turned back to Nash, grinning like shed just made a clever joke and I was the punch line, and I was ashamed of how relieved I was to no longer be the focus of her attention. What are we talking about?
Its private, I said, my hand clenching around my backpack strap.
Oh. Speaking of private, I actually slept pretty well last night, for once. I think I just needed to be really worn out to make it happen, you know? She raised one brow at me, and I fought another chill as she turned to Nash. Good thing your mom works nights now.
I reeled like Id been punched in the gut. My breath deserted me, and my lungs refused to draw in more air.
Kaylee Nash tried to reach for me, but I pushed him away and stumbled backward into the lockers. When I could finally breathe, I looked right into his eyes, silently demanding that he let me see the truth.
You were with her last night?
More like early this morning, Sabine said casually, like she couldnt tell I was upset. But she knew exactly what she was doing. I could tell from the way she watched for my reaction, rather than his. She was studying me. Sizing up the competition. And deep inside, I knew I should have been happy about thatthat she considered me serious competition.
But closer to the surface, I was thoroughly pissed. Warm flames of rage battled the chill that resurged every time I glanced at her, until I felt half frozen, half roasted, and thoroughly confused.
We had a lot to catch up on, she added, while Nashs jaw clenched. Thats not a problem, is it? I mean, you guys broke up, right? Thats what Nash said
Sabine, he said at last. Ill see you at lunch. I need to talk to Kaylee before the bell.
She shrugged and smiled like she hadnt just ruined my whole day. Or like shed meant to. I gotta head to class, anyway. Im trying out this punctuality thing. The guidance counselor says its all the rage. She winked at himactually winked!then turned to squint at my cheek, like Id suddenly grown a wart. Hold still, Kay My pulse spiked at her unwelcome use of my nickname. Youve got an eyelash.
Sabine reached out and brushed one finger slowly, deliberately across my cheek, but her gaze never left mine. In fact, it strengthened, as if she was trying to see through my eyes into the back of my skull.
I wanted to pull away, but I couldnt. I could only stare back as that instant stretched into eternity, and I stood frozen.
Of course, so could Sabine.
Im glad. Thats really good, Nash, I said, hating how lame I sounded. Did Hallmark make a card for former addict ex-boyfriends who were trying to stay clean?
Sowhat did you want to talk about? he asked, as I clung to the strap of my backpack like a life preserver. Why was I so nervous?
I just I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, then made myself look at him. How worried should I be about Sabine?
At the mention of her name, Nashs irises exploded into motion, swirling so fast I couldnt interpret what he was feeling. And with sudden, frightening insight, I realized that was because he didnt know what he was feeling. Probably several conflicting emotions. But whatever they were, they were strong.
Worried about her? His irises went suddenly still, as he slammed the lid shut on his emotions, blocking me out. I couldnt blame him. Who wants to walk around looking like a giant mood ring? But I was desperate for a hint of what he really felt about her. And about me. I needed to know where I stood. Why would you
But before he could finish, she was suddenly there, down the hall, shouting his name like she didnt care who heard. Or who turned to stare.
Sabine was fearless.
Nash! She jogged down the hall toward us, bag bouncing on her back, low-cut khakis barely hanging on to her hips. As she came to a stop, she reached into her hip pocket and pulled out a cell phone. Nashs cell phone. You left this in my car. You know, you should really set it to autolock. Otherwise, all your informations just there for the taking Instead of handing him the phone, she stepped close and slid it slowly into his front left pocket, letting her fingers linger until he actually had to pull her hand from his pocket. Right there in the hall.
My face flamed. I could feel my cheeks burning and could see a scarlet half-moon at the bottom edge of my vision.
Umthanks, Nash said.
Anytime, she purred, then finally seemed to notice me standing there. Hey, Katie, whats up? Her black eyes stared into mine, and I flashed back to my dream from the night before. Chill bumps popped up beneath my sleeves, and if I didnt know any better, Id swear the fluorescent light overhead flickered just to cast deep shadows beneath her eyes.
It was everything I could do not to shudder. Something was wrong with her. How could Nash not see it? Looking into Sabines eyes was like taking a breath with my head stuck inside the freezer.
Its Kaylee, I said throughgritted teeth, forcing the words out when what I really wanted was to excuse myself and walk away. Fast. And we were talking.
Oh, good! She turned back to Nash, grinning like shed just made a clever joke and I was the punch line, and I was ashamed of how relieved I was to no longer be the focus of her attention. What are we talking about?
Its private, I said, my hand clenching around my backpack strap.
Oh. Speaking of private, I actually slept pretty well last night, for once. I think I just needed to be really worn out to make it happen, you know? She raised one brow at me, and I fought another chill as she turned to Nash. Good thing your mom works nights now.
I reeled like Id been punched in the gut. My breath deserted me, and my lungs refused to draw in more air.
Kaylee Nash tried to reach for me, but I pushed him away and stumbled backward into the lockers. When I could finally breathe, I looked right into his eyes, silently demanding that he let me see the truth.
You were with her last night?
More like early this morning, Sabine said casually, like she couldnt tell I was upset. But she knew exactly what she was doing. I could tell from the way she watched for my reaction, rather than his. She was studying me. Sizing up the competition. And deep inside, I knew I should have been happy about thatthat she considered me serious competition.
But closer to the surface, I was thoroughly pissed. Warm flames of rage battled the chill that resurged every time I glanced at her, until I felt half frozen, half roasted, and thoroughly confused.
We had a lot to catch up on, she added, while Nashs jaw clenched. Thats not a problem, is it? I mean, you guys broke up, right? Thats what Nash said
Sabine, he said at last. Ill see you at lunch. I need to talk to Kaylee before the bell.
She shrugged and smiled like she hadnt just ruined my whole day. Or like shed meant to. I gotta head to class, anyway. Im trying out this punctuality thing. The guidance counselor says its all the rage. She winked at himactually winked!then turned to squint at my cheek, like Id suddenly grown a wart. Hold still, Kay My pulse spiked at her unwelcome use of my nickname. Youve got an eyelash.
Sabine reached out and brushed one finger slowly, deliberately across my cheek, but her gaze never left mine. In fact, it strengthened, as if she was trying to see through my eyes into the back of my skull.
I wanted to pull away, but I couldnt. I could only stare back as that instant stretched into eternity, and I stood frozen.