My Soul to Take
Page 57
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Not that I needed him. Thanks to his cowardice, I had a perfectly good set of guardians at my disposal. But he owed me an explanation, and if I wasnt going to get it in person, I could at least demand it over the phone.
I tossed the covers back and stepped into the pajama pants pooled on the floor, and when I opened my door, there stood Sophie, completely dressed and in full makeup, looking as fresh and well-put-together as Id ever seen her. The only sign that her nights slumber had been chemically induced was the slight puffiness around her eyes, which would probably be gone within the hour.
The last time Id taken one of the zombie pills, Id woken up looking like roadkill.
Thanks. I took the home phone from Sophie, and she only nodded, then turned and plodded down the hall with none of her usual watch-me-prance energy.
I kicked my door shut and held the cordless phone to my ear. It felt huge and cumbersome after my cell, and I couldnt remember the last time Id actually held the home phone.
You could have called my cell, I said into the receiver.
I know.
My fathers voice was just like I remembereddeep, and smooth, and distant. He probably looked exactly the same too, which meant my appearance would likely come as a bit of a shock to him, despite his understanding of the passage of time. I was almost fifteen the last time hed seen me. Things had changed. I had changed.
I have this number memorized, so it was just easier, he continued. That was absentee-father-speak for Im too embarrassed to admit I dont remember your cell-phone number. Even though I pay the bill.
So let me guess. I pulled out my desk chair and plopped into it, punching the power button on my computer just to keep my hands busy. Youre not coming.
Of course Im coming. I could practically hear him frowning over the line, and thats when I realized I could also hear actual background noise. An official-sounding voice over a loudspeaker. Random snatches of conversation. Echoing footsteps.
He was at the airport.
My flights been delayed by engine trouble in Chicago. But with any luck, Ill be in this evening. I just wanted to let you know Id be late.
Oh. Okay. Soooo glad I didnt start by demanding he tell me everything over the phone. I guess Ill see you tonight.
Yeah. Silence settled over the line then, because he didnt know what to say, and I was not going to make it easier on him by speaking first. Finally, he cleared his throat. Are you okay? His voice feltheavy, as if he wanted to say more, but left the unspoken words hanging.
Fine. Not that you could fix it if I werent, I thought, jiggling my mouse to find the cursoron-screen. Its all taken some getting used to, but Im ready to have all the secrets out in the open.
Im so sorry about all this, Kaylee. I know I owe you the truthabout everythingbut some of this wont be easy for me to say, so I need you to bear with me. Please.
Like I have a choice. But as furious as I was over the massive lie that was my life, I was desperate to know why theyd all lied in the first place. Surely they had a good reason for letting me think I was crazy, rather than telling me the truth.
My father sighed. Can I take you out for dinner when I get in?
Well, Ill have to eat something. I double-clicked on my Internet browser and typed the name of a local news station into the search bar, hoping for an update.
He hesitated for another long moment, as if waiting for more, and as badly as part of me wanted to speak, wanted to spare him the awful silence Id suffered, I resisted. Birthday visits and Christmas cards werent enough to hold his place in my life. Especially since theyd stopped comingIll see you tonight, then.
Okay. I hung up and set the phone on the desktop, staring at it blankly for several seconds. Then I released the breath I hadnt realized I was holding and scrolled through the days headlines online, hoping to purge my father from my thoughts. At least until he showed up on the porch.
There was nothing new about Alyson Baker or Meredith Cole, but the coroner had officially declared a cause of death for Heidi Anderson. Heart failure. But wasnt that ultimately what everyone died of? However, in Heidis case, there was no cause listed for her heart failure. As Id known all along, shed simply died. Period.
Frustrated all over again, I turned off the computer and dropped the home phone into its cradle on my way to the bathroom. Twenty minutes later, showered, blow-dried, and dressed, I sat at the bar in the kitchen with a glass of juice and a granola bar. Id just ripped open the wrapper when Aunt Val wandered in, wrapped in my uncles terry-cloth robe, rather than her usual silky one. Her hair was one big blond tangle, yesterdays styling gel spiking random strands in odd places, like a leftover punk rockers. Eyeliner was smeared below her eyes, and her skin was pale beneath lingering blotches of blush and foundation.
She shuffled straight to the coffeepot, which was already full and steaming. For several minutes, I chewed in silence as she sipped, but by the time she brought her second mug to the counter, the caffeine had kicked in.
Im sorry about last night, hon. She combed one hand over her hair, trying to smooth it. I didnt mean to embarrass you in front of your boyfriend.
I tossed the covers back and stepped into the pajama pants pooled on the floor, and when I opened my door, there stood Sophie, completely dressed and in full makeup, looking as fresh and well-put-together as Id ever seen her. The only sign that her nights slumber had been chemically induced was the slight puffiness around her eyes, which would probably be gone within the hour.
The last time Id taken one of the zombie pills, Id woken up looking like roadkill.
Thanks. I took the home phone from Sophie, and she only nodded, then turned and plodded down the hall with none of her usual watch-me-prance energy.
I kicked my door shut and held the cordless phone to my ear. It felt huge and cumbersome after my cell, and I couldnt remember the last time Id actually held the home phone.
You could have called my cell, I said into the receiver.
I know.
My fathers voice was just like I remembereddeep, and smooth, and distant. He probably looked exactly the same too, which meant my appearance would likely come as a bit of a shock to him, despite his understanding of the passage of time. I was almost fifteen the last time hed seen me. Things had changed. I had changed.
I have this number memorized, so it was just easier, he continued. That was absentee-father-speak for Im too embarrassed to admit I dont remember your cell-phone number. Even though I pay the bill.
So let me guess. I pulled out my desk chair and plopped into it, punching the power button on my computer just to keep my hands busy. Youre not coming.
Of course Im coming. I could practically hear him frowning over the line, and thats when I realized I could also hear actual background noise. An official-sounding voice over a loudspeaker. Random snatches of conversation. Echoing footsteps.
He was at the airport.
My flights been delayed by engine trouble in Chicago. But with any luck, Ill be in this evening. I just wanted to let you know Id be late.
Oh. Okay. Soooo glad I didnt start by demanding he tell me everything over the phone. I guess Ill see you tonight.
Yeah. Silence settled over the line then, because he didnt know what to say, and I was not going to make it easier on him by speaking first. Finally, he cleared his throat. Are you okay? His voice feltheavy, as if he wanted to say more, but left the unspoken words hanging.
Fine. Not that you could fix it if I werent, I thought, jiggling my mouse to find the cursoron-screen. Its all taken some getting used to, but Im ready to have all the secrets out in the open.
Im so sorry about all this, Kaylee. I know I owe you the truthabout everythingbut some of this wont be easy for me to say, so I need you to bear with me. Please.
Like I have a choice. But as furious as I was over the massive lie that was my life, I was desperate to know why theyd all lied in the first place. Surely they had a good reason for letting me think I was crazy, rather than telling me the truth.
My father sighed. Can I take you out for dinner when I get in?
Well, Ill have to eat something. I double-clicked on my Internet browser and typed the name of a local news station into the search bar, hoping for an update.
He hesitated for another long moment, as if waiting for more, and as badly as part of me wanted to speak, wanted to spare him the awful silence Id suffered, I resisted. Birthday visits and Christmas cards werent enough to hold his place in my life. Especially since theyd stopped comingIll see you tonight, then.
Okay. I hung up and set the phone on the desktop, staring at it blankly for several seconds. Then I released the breath I hadnt realized I was holding and scrolled through the days headlines online, hoping to purge my father from my thoughts. At least until he showed up on the porch.
There was nothing new about Alyson Baker or Meredith Cole, but the coroner had officially declared a cause of death for Heidi Anderson. Heart failure. But wasnt that ultimately what everyone died of? However, in Heidis case, there was no cause listed for her heart failure. As Id known all along, shed simply died. Period.
Frustrated all over again, I turned off the computer and dropped the home phone into its cradle on my way to the bathroom. Twenty minutes later, showered, blow-dried, and dressed, I sat at the bar in the kitchen with a glass of juice and a granola bar. Id just ripped open the wrapper when Aunt Val wandered in, wrapped in my uncles terry-cloth robe, rather than her usual silky one. Her hair was one big blond tangle, yesterdays styling gel spiking random strands in odd places, like a leftover punk rockers. Eyeliner was smeared below her eyes, and her skin was pale beneath lingering blotches of blush and foundation.
She shuffled straight to the coffeepot, which was already full and steaming. For several minutes, I chewed in silence as she sipped, but by the time she brought her second mug to the counter, the caffeine had kicked in.
Im sorry about last night, hon. She combed one hand over her hair, trying to smooth it. I didnt mean to embarrass you in front of your boyfriend.
