Night's Honor
Page 64

She threw out one hand in an uncontrolled gesture. After everything that had happened, she felt like she had come full circle, back to the same place she had been the night of the Vampyre’s Ball. Nothing he did seemed out of place or unconsidered, and everything she did felt overdone, out of balance.
“It was rather hard to miss,” she said. “Unlike all the many clues I’ve seen over the last six weeks.”
“And this upsets you.” He cocked his head, studying her as if she were an alien.
Where was his warmth, the passion and emotional openness from earlier this morning? Had it all been an act?
She turned away from him, wrapped her arms around her middle and hunched her shoulders. “Yes. No. I don’t know.”
His hands came down on her shoulders, and she jumped. He said in her ear, “Well, that is definitely a comprehensive range of reaction, I must admit.”
Her body reacted again to the sound of his voice, so close. She felt as if he had just passed a hand down her naked back, and she shivered.
His hands tightened. He said even more softly, “Will you not tell me what is going through your mind right now? I truly don’t have any clue.”
He sounded so patient and gentle, this centuries-old Vampyre who was once a priest.
Who played the piano, loved to waltz, read philosophy and quoted love poetry.
And ran a spy ring.
She closed her eyes. I’m nobody, she thought. I’m not even out of my twenties. I’ve never been anywhere interesting or done anything useful. I’m just a foster brat who got too greedy and cocky, and barely managed to make it out of a tricky situation alive.
“I’m trying to run away,” she whispered. “Inside my head.”
“You promised you wouldn’t. And I told you what would happen if you did.” He ran his lips lightly over the delicate shell of her ear, and she shivered. “I would come after you.”
What if she kept her eyes closed and let herself fall back, and trusted that he would catch her?
Tentatively, she leaned back into him.
His arms came around her, and he pulled her against his chest, holding her tightly. “Don’t stop talking,” he said, very low. “Show me where you are so I can find you.”
“I feel stupid,” she confessed. “I saw the clues, but I didn’t put any of them together.”
“Why would you? Why would any normal person put all of that together?” He kissed her temple. “Does it matter that much to you what I do?”
“Honestly, no, it doesn’t,” she told him.
He laughed a little, a quiet exhalation of breath. “Now I am completely in the dark again.”
She shook her head. “I didn’t say that right. Of course it matters what you do. In fact, I’m fascinated. But when I heard you talking and put it all together, the thing that shook me was—we made love. I made love to you.”
“I remember it all too well.” He laid his head on her shoulder as he cradled her. “I haven’t been able to get it out of my mind.”
She gripped his forearm. “In the moment, I truly felt like I knew what I was doing, and I wasn’t just being impetuous, but you know what? I was being impetuous, and I don’t really know you. That’s what I realized when I listened to you and Diego. And you were right, when you brought this up earlier—I’ve barely gotten over the fact that you’re a Vampyre. We’ve been acquainted for six weeks, and we’ve spent one night together, and . . .” The growing lump in her throat forced her into silence.
“Tess,” he whispered. He rubbed his face in her tousled hair. “I know it’s early days, and we have so much more to learn about each other. But it’s still okay to fall in love with me. I would be so honored if you did, and I would keep all of your emotions safe. I will never betray your trust. I swear it.”
She let her head fall against his shoulder, turned her face toward him and he bent her back and kissed her, and the thing of it was, she believed him.
She really believed him.
She said against his mouth, “It’s hard to let go and stay in one place.”
“I’ve never once seen you run when you’re afraid, and I’ve seen you very afraid.” His lips pulled into a smile. He kissed the tip of her nose. “You have such courage. It’s one of the things I admire most about you.”
Twisting around to face him fully, she slipped an arm around his neck and returned his kiss. Heat built between them, fast and urgent. She clenched her fists in the back of his shirt, so hungry again for him she shook all over.
Somehow, despite everything he’d been through and everything he did, he carried a light inside of himself that made her ravenous. When she wasn’t with him, the world felt darker and colder. It was impossible to imagine she could ever get enough of him, and that scared her more than anything.
He slanted his mouth over hers, his lips hardened and demanding. Shuddering, she kissed him back with everything she had. He slid one long-fingered hand into her hair, at the back of her head, holding her in place while he cupped and massaged her breast through the soft, thin material of the robe.
After several moments, he pulled back with obvious reluctance. “Much as I would love to take you back to bed and pick up where we left off, I promised to drive Diego into the city.”
With an immense effort, she tried to chain the crazy woman inside of her that urged her to ignore all common sense and tear off all his clothes. She pulled back enough to search his gaze. “Are you upset over him leaving?”
“I’m disappointed, but I’m not surprised.” He shook his head. “Life at the estate is a very small, specific world.”
“I love it there,” she said quietly.
His face lit with a smile. “I do too, but I also recognize that the lifestyle isn’t for everyone. As much as Melisande moans about the rat race in Los Angeles, she could never leave it.” His smile faded. “And I simply don’t have anything else to offer him. I offered to talk to Julian about finding Diego a position at Evenfall, but he’s determined to make a complete change.”
Straightening her spine, she made herself let go of his shirt. “Do you want me to stay here while you take him?”
“Hell, no,” he said forcefully. He rubbed his face and continued with more moderation. “I’m not leaving you alone in Evenfall, especially not when Justine is around.”