Preppy: The Life & Death of Samuel Clearwater, Part Two
Page 38
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“She saved my life.
“After I got out of the hospital I checked back into rehab and I never touched a needle again. And every time I feel myself sliding down into the abyss I find comfort in thinking about her. In a way I like to think that talking about her gives her a new kind of life, because although it was short, it had so much meaning. SHE had meaning.
“I was slipping. I wasn’t strong enough to save myself, But it turns out that she was strong enough for the both of us. So now it’s my job to be strong for her,” I scanned the crowd and my eyes fell on the motionless shadow in the back row. “And I have no intentions of ever letting her down.”
****
I left right after my speech, not waiting until the end. I walked down the aisle to find the last row empty. Pain welled in my chest as I told myself that it was expected. There would be no reason for him to stick around after what I’d just said. I knew he’d be angry, I knew he’d hate me for what I’d done and he had every right to. But he had a right to know and although I was crushed he wasn’t there, a big part of me was glad he finally knew about his daughter.
I pushed open the double doors that lead to the front room of the church from the chapel and was about to exit through the front when a voice stopped me. “She was mine?”
I turned to find Preppy standing against the wall in the corner, his expression unreadable. “I thought you left.”
“She was mine?” he repeated.
I nodded.
“Fuck you,” he spat. “Why didn’t you come tell me? Why...” he stopped, pushed off the wall and came to stand in front of me. His eyes rimmed in red as they searched mine for answers.
“After how we left things I didn’t think you’d really care and even if you would care what would be the point? It was too late, there wasn’t anything that could be done.”
“I would’ve cared,” he argued. “And I could’ve been there for you.”
“I wouldn’t have known that,” I responded, biting my bottom lip and I could tell from the shift in his expression that he understood.
“You...” he started, his eyebrows furrowed. He glanced down to my stomach in confusion and reached out, placing his flattened palm over the fabric of my dress then bunching the fabric in his hands. I felt the warmth of his hand through the material of my dress as if he were touching bare skin. “You were carrying my baby,” his voice almost a whisper.
Although it wasn’t a question, I nodded, sniffling and shuffling my feet as he continued to stare at me as if he were seeing me for the first time.
“You had to go through that all alone,” he said. “My baby...”
“I’m so sorry,” I said, filling the awkward silence. “My body was still recovering and too weak to carry her and I’m so...”
“Stop,” Preppy said, holding up a hand.
“But...”
“Stop!” he said. “God damnit, Doc! You should have told me. I would’ve been there for you. I would have come running if I knew you’d just lost our baby. You shouldn’t have been alone for that.”
“I’m just so so...”
My apology was cut short when Preppy descended on me, crushing his lips against mine. I squealed as a surprising bolt of confusion and desire pulsed through my entire body as his kiss grew deeper and more desperate. He lifted me off my feet and swung me around, pushing my back against the wall next to a door marked OFFICE. I opened my mouth to him and when our tongues tangled together he groaned and used his knee to spread my legs further apart. My dress rode up my thighs, one less layer between us as his hands met my bare ass.
A thin strip of wet cotton was all that was left to cover me.
Preppy rocked against me, groaning. I gasped into his mouth when I felt his hard cock, huge and ready, against my core. “I thought,” I started, searching his face. The chords in his neck were tight. His face was flushed.
Preppy chuckled and spoke against my lips. “I thought too, Doc. I guess my cock was just waiting for the right place and time.”
“A church during an NA meeting?” I asked with a smile, panting as my body responded to his every touch. He rocked against me again, harder this time. My insides clenched, needing him to fill me, wanting him deep inside of me.
“If my cock wants to fuck you in a church then who the fuck am I to argue?” Preppy asked before pressing his lips back to mine and continuing the agony of the most passion filled kiss I’d ever experienced in my life. “I’ll take it as a sign from God that I should fuck you right here and now.”
“What?” I asked breathlessly, as Preppy dipped one hand between us pushing my panties aside. The second his fingers connected with my delicate flesh I bucked off the wall and Preppy grabbed me tighter by the waist, pulling me in closer, locking me to him.
“Shhhh, gonna fuck you, Doc. Gonna make you come so hard you’re gonna drip down my fucking cock,” he said, his voice low and raw as he circled my aching clit and I writhed for more.
“Is that what’s happening? We’re fucking?” I asked. “Because there is a room full of people in there that will be coming out of those doors in about ten minutes or so.”
He stared deep into my eyes. “Doc, I’ve waited way too long for this. I don’t care that it’s in a church. I don’t care if we have an audience gathered around us. I don’t care if the cops show up and try to drag us away because I won’t let them. All I care about is this and us. Right now. Right fucking now,” he groaned inserting a finger inside me. “Holy fucking shit, Doc. You’re tighter than I remember. Holy fucking shit.” Preppy looked around and then back to me. “Here,” he said, reaching for the door handle marked office and carrying me inside the small room. “But only because I know once I get inside that tight fucking pussy that I won’t want to come out for a while.”
My insides screamed for his words to be reality and I was embarrassingly wet, dripping down my inner thighs.
Inside the room was small. A few computers lined one of the walls with a desk in the middle and a small couch on the other side. At one of the computers, sitting in the dark, was a portly guy around his early thirties with a shaved head. When we barged into the room he stood up abruptly, knocking over a chair as Preppy set me down but didn’t let me get too far, he held me close to his side. “Get out,” Preppy instructed the man.
“After I got out of the hospital I checked back into rehab and I never touched a needle again. And every time I feel myself sliding down into the abyss I find comfort in thinking about her. In a way I like to think that talking about her gives her a new kind of life, because although it was short, it had so much meaning. SHE had meaning.
“I was slipping. I wasn’t strong enough to save myself, But it turns out that she was strong enough for the both of us. So now it’s my job to be strong for her,” I scanned the crowd and my eyes fell on the motionless shadow in the back row. “And I have no intentions of ever letting her down.”
****
I left right after my speech, not waiting until the end. I walked down the aisle to find the last row empty. Pain welled in my chest as I told myself that it was expected. There would be no reason for him to stick around after what I’d just said. I knew he’d be angry, I knew he’d hate me for what I’d done and he had every right to. But he had a right to know and although I was crushed he wasn’t there, a big part of me was glad he finally knew about his daughter.
I pushed open the double doors that lead to the front room of the church from the chapel and was about to exit through the front when a voice stopped me. “She was mine?”
I turned to find Preppy standing against the wall in the corner, his expression unreadable. “I thought you left.”
“She was mine?” he repeated.
I nodded.
“Fuck you,” he spat. “Why didn’t you come tell me? Why...” he stopped, pushed off the wall and came to stand in front of me. His eyes rimmed in red as they searched mine for answers.
“After how we left things I didn’t think you’d really care and even if you would care what would be the point? It was too late, there wasn’t anything that could be done.”
“I would’ve cared,” he argued. “And I could’ve been there for you.”
“I wouldn’t have known that,” I responded, biting my bottom lip and I could tell from the shift in his expression that he understood.
“You...” he started, his eyebrows furrowed. He glanced down to my stomach in confusion and reached out, placing his flattened palm over the fabric of my dress then bunching the fabric in his hands. I felt the warmth of his hand through the material of my dress as if he were touching bare skin. “You were carrying my baby,” his voice almost a whisper.
Although it wasn’t a question, I nodded, sniffling and shuffling my feet as he continued to stare at me as if he were seeing me for the first time.
“You had to go through that all alone,” he said. “My baby...”
“I’m so sorry,” I said, filling the awkward silence. “My body was still recovering and too weak to carry her and I’m so...”
“Stop,” Preppy said, holding up a hand.
“But...”
“Stop!” he said. “God damnit, Doc! You should have told me. I would’ve been there for you. I would have come running if I knew you’d just lost our baby. You shouldn’t have been alone for that.”
“I’m just so so...”
My apology was cut short when Preppy descended on me, crushing his lips against mine. I squealed as a surprising bolt of confusion and desire pulsed through my entire body as his kiss grew deeper and more desperate. He lifted me off my feet and swung me around, pushing my back against the wall next to a door marked OFFICE. I opened my mouth to him and when our tongues tangled together he groaned and used his knee to spread my legs further apart. My dress rode up my thighs, one less layer between us as his hands met my bare ass.
A thin strip of wet cotton was all that was left to cover me.
Preppy rocked against me, groaning. I gasped into his mouth when I felt his hard cock, huge and ready, against my core. “I thought,” I started, searching his face. The chords in his neck were tight. His face was flushed.
Preppy chuckled and spoke against my lips. “I thought too, Doc. I guess my cock was just waiting for the right place and time.”
“A church during an NA meeting?” I asked with a smile, panting as my body responded to his every touch. He rocked against me again, harder this time. My insides clenched, needing him to fill me, wanting him deep inside of me.
“If my cock wants to fuck you in a church then who the fuck am I to argue?” Preppy asked before pressing his lips back to mine and continuing the agony of the most passion filled kiss I’d ever experienced in my life. “I’ll take it as a sign from God that I should fuck you right here and now.”
“What?” I asked breathlessly, as Preppy dipped one hand between us pushing my panties aside. The second his fingers connected with my delicate flesh I bucked off the wall and Preppy grabbed me tighter by the waist, pulling me in closer, locking me to him.
“Shhhh, gonna fuck you, Doc. Gonna make you come so hard you’re gonna drip down my fucking cock,” he said, his voice low and raw as he circled my aching clit and I writhed for more.
“Is that what’s happening? We’re fucking?” I asked. “Because there is a room full of people in there that will be coming out of those doors in about ten minutes or so.”
He stared deep into my eyes. “Doc, I’ve waited way too long for this. I don’t care that it’s in a church. I don’t care if we have an audience gathered around us. I don’t care if the cops show up and try to drag us away because I won’t let them. All I care about is this and us. Right now. Right fucking now,” he groaned inserting a finger inside me. “Holy fucking shit, Doc. You’re tighter than I remember. Holy fucking shit.” Preppy looked around and then back to me. “Here,” he said, reaching for the door handle marked office and carrying me inside the small room. “But only because I know once I get inside that tight fucking pussy that I won’t want to come out for a while.”
My insides screamed for his words to be reality and I was embarrassingly wet, dripping down my inner thighs.
Inside the room was small. A few computers lined one of the walls with a desk in the middle and a small couch on the other side. At one of the computers, sitting in the dark, was a portly guy around his early thirties with a shaved head. When we barged into the room he stood up abruptly, knocking over a chair as Preppy set me down but didn’t let me get too far, he held me close to his side. “Get out,” Preppy instructed the man.
