Real Vampires Hate Skinny Jeans
Page 34

 Gerry Bartlett

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“That’s enough, Aggie.” My stomach rolled as I started the car. I didn’t put it in gear yet, though. I pushed the button to lower the top then looked at Flo’s pale face under the light from the streetlamp. “You okay, Flo?”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean… You are nothing like this creature.” She hissed when Aggie reached through to adjust the rearview mirror so she could reapply her lipstick. “I have only known the vampire Gloriana, my dear friend. The one who dances like an angel and has ancient vampire blood, not blood that reeks of seaweed and clams. You are nothing like her, Glory.”
“Gag me. What next? A flurry of Facebook posts about how much you love your BFF? Or maybe you should tweet about it. Just spare me listening to this crap.” Aggie tossed her lipstick into her purse. “Get going. If we’re late, we’ll all be sorry.”
“You want to get out, Flo? I wouldn’t blame you. In fact, I hope you’ll stay here. Aggie’s aggravation is nothing compared to what the Storm God will pull out of his bag of tricks.” I touched Flo’s clenched fist. “Please. I don’t want you to get hurt because of me.” I gave Aggie a “Go to hell” look when she broke into “O Solo Mio.”
“No. We go. We fight. We win.” She hit Aggie’s hand when the Siren reached for the rearview mirror again. “Sit back. Now that the top is down, your smell will blow away in the wind. And know this, Aggie. My best friend is nothing like you. You should pay attention to how she treats people. You say you want friends of your own? Then watch her and learn.” Flo opened her own purse and put on fresh lipstick by feel then handed the tube to me. “This is a new color, Firecracker. We will blow this god out of the water. He will worship at our feet. Eh?”
I sighed. “Wait, honey. Maybe we should stop and pick up nuns’ habits. Do you really want to charm a guy who has a harem?”
“Pah. I only know one way to deal with a man. I use it.” She nodded at the lipstick. “He didn’t kill you when he had the chance, amica. I say go with your best look.”
“You have a point.” I shook my head and applied the color with the expertise of years of practice. Leave it to Flo to make this into a battle she would fight with her best weapons. I turned and glanced at Aggie. I knew where all this hostility was coming from. I’d had centuries of freedom, well away from Achelous’s obviously abusive reign of terror. I could afford to cut the Siren some slack.
“Relax, Ag. I really don’t want to be your enemy. You’ve obviously had a tough life. If Achelous asks? I’ll say you’ve been singing his praises. Almost making me sorry I ever lost my spot on a rock.” Of course if he reads my mind…
“Glory, you can’t say that. You might end up back in an ocean somewhere.” Flo grabbed my hand before I could shift into drive.
“She’s right. I’ll speak for myself. But I appreciate the thought. Best to just let Achy do the talking. He will anyway.” Aggie shuddered. “I don’t mind telling you I’m creeped out. Any meeting with Achy is a crapshoot. I have no idea how this could play out. So let’s just get this over with.”
“Yeah. One way or another, I want some answers.” But would I be able to live with them? And why did I have the feeling that getting out of this meeting alive wasn’t exactly a sure thing? I put the car in gear and had to force my foot to hit the accelerator. When I had to stop at a red light, I looked up into a clear night sky. Not a sign that a storm was coming. If only I could count on that.
Twelve
Laurie was waiting for us when we walked onto the stone terrace that faced the lake. We’d had to leave the car in the driveway and pick our way around the debris from the ruined house to the meeting place. It was a shame that a confrontation with a sicko vampire hunter had led to the house going up in flames. It had been a rental, fully insured, but the depressed real estate market had apparently kept the owner from rebuilding. Too bad. The view from the terrace was spectacular with stone steps leading down to a charred boat dock and one of Austin’s many lakes gleaming in the moonlight.
“No sign of him yet.” Laurie hadn’t changed out of her pretty outfit. I guess she figured looking good might come in handy as a weapon in this case or at least a distraction.
“We are a little early.” Aggie stared out at the lake. “I wonder if I have time for a swim.” She laid her sweater on the stone wall and reached back as if she was about to unzip her blue silk dress.
“Spare us.” I grabbed her arm. “We really don’t want to watch you strip down.”
“Speak for yourself.” The booming voice was accompanied by a sizzle of lightning that popped and snapped nearby. A small bush went up in flames and we all froze. The man shimmering into view was tall, athletic and garbed in a Roman look, from the laurel wreath crowning his golden blond hair to the snow white toga draping his perfect body.
Aggie bowed before him, her forehead almost touching her knees. She gestured like the rest of us should do the same, but I decided that just wasn’t happening. Flo and Laurie took their cues from me. I felt sick that apparently at least some of what Aggie had been telling me was true. And Ian’s report. Siren blood. God. I had to struggle to keep from running screaming back to the car.
“Achelous. You summoned me?” At least I could still speak and actually move. I could shift the hell out of there. No, this had to be faced. Flo nervously fussed with the hem of her top and bit her lip, signs he’d left her free too. Laurie eased nearer the low stone wall. He must not have thought much of my allies to allow them their mobility. Of course the god could make any of us statues on a whim.
“Yes, Gloriana. Aglaophonos informed me that you now know your true identity and that you have questions for me.” Achelous’s smile, a dazzling show of perfect white teeth, reminded me of Lucifer’s. Both of them were cold, self-centered men who didn’t have a lot of respect for women. “I thought I was done with you centuries ago. But obviously somehow you managed to avoid the fate I intended. Amazing, really. Imagine my surprise when I saw you here the first time. And a blood sucker at that.” He swept his gaze over me in a way that made me want to cover my breasts. “Come closer, my dear.”
“I’d rather not. I had a taste of your temper when we met here before. Down at the boat dock and not that long ago.” I glanced at Aggie. “Can she get up now?”
“Aglaophonos? Of course. Child? Quit prostrating yourself. Feeling guilty? You should. It is your carelessness that brought Gloriana and me together again. I thought myself well rid of her.” Achelous waved his hand and wind whipped across the clearing, stirring up trash and bending tree branches.
“I-I’m sorry, sire. I didn’t know that my blood—” Aggie blanched when he placed his hand on her shoulder.
“You gave your blood to a vampire. Not just to test, but you let him drink from you, shared his bed. Is that not so?” Thunder shook the stones under our feet as Achy glared at the Siren. Flo and I exchanged glances. So Ian drank from Aggie during their bed play. No surprise there.
“Is it forbidden? Mentioned in the archives? I didn’t know.” Aggie’s voice trembled and she sank to her knees. “What is my punishment to be?” You could tell that her choices were bad and worse.
“Get up, out of my sight. I will think about it. It should be common sense that we don’t share our blood with lesser beings.” He thrust her away with his foot and she scurried off into the darkness. We heard a splash and I figured she’d jumped into the lake, clothes and all.
“Did you learn anything from that, Gloriana?” Achelous approached me and I tried not to cringe when he stopped just inches away.
“That you think vampires are beneath you?” I kept my chin up. “I figure a god would of course hold himself above all others.” I didn’t share that I was having a hard time swallowing the idea that Aggie was better than me.
“I see that you have pride in what you are now. Of course you do. You were always full of yourself. Thought you were above my rules.” Achy flung out an arm and dark clouds roiled and roared. Okay, so I did cringe that time. The noise was horrific.
I noticed that Laurie had eased behind him and she wasn’t a bit disturbed by the racket. If she went tiger, could she take him down? I knew there was no way that she’d live through a move like that. I shook my head slightly when Achelous looked up to admire a particularly brilliant lightning display.
“What rules? You erased my memories so I have no idea what I did to piss you off. Then apparently you tossed me out of the sea. Want to tell me about it? Why I lost my place in what Aggie calls a sisterhood?” I wondered if I really wanted to know. I’d obviously served this man once just as Aggie still did. Done things… I pressed my trembling hands to my queasy stomach. It had been a lucky escape from what I could tell.
“How old am I?” The question popped out of me.
Achy laughed. “Interesting question. And one only a woman would concern herself with when her life is hanging by a thread.” He walked around me, examining me. “You served me for a little more than a millennia. Add the several odd centuries you’ve been vampire to that and you have your age.”
“You’re fourteen hundred years old!” Flo gasped. “Glory, you’re even older than I am.”
“Thanks a lot, Flo.” I let that fact whirl around in my mind for a moment. “Now will you tell me exactly why you banished me?”
“First, I must solve a little problem.” Achy suddenly disappeared, just vanished. I peered into the darkness surrounding us.
“Where’d he go?” I figured Laurie would have the best idea.
“He’s rounding up some visitors.” She made a face. “We should have known they wouldn’t stay away.”
“What do you mean?”
“Look, Glory.” Flo squeezed my arm and pointed to the edge of the clearing where the house had once stood. Sure enough Achelous was striding behind two men. You couldn’t miss the procession because of the ring of lightning bolts forming bars around them, like a moving jail cell holding prisoners. Apparently Rafe and Jerry had decided to join the party.